YSaC, Vol. CLXVI.v
A bonus for New Years Eve:
flammable stuff for new years party!!!
we are looking for stuff to burn for winterburn’s rockin new years eve party! desks, couches, christmas trees, anything that will go up in righteous new years flaming glory! contact dan winterburn @ xxx-xxx-xxxx. asap!!!
I’m going to file this one under “this can only end badly”. In fact, I think I might actually need to start a tag for that.
Does anybody else imagine that if this guy was reading the posting out loud he’d sound like Beevis? Maybe it’s me.
Aw, you’re just mad because your invitation to winterburn’s rockin new years eve party hasn’t come in the mail yet.
Dan scares me. And yes, in my head he totally sounds like Beavis!!
Oh, dear. Well, I suppose their “winterburn” will be *festive*, at the very least, though I can think of at least a dozen other words to describe it.
If by “festive” you meant “festering”.
Perhaps Zentastic meant it in the festive sense of Wickerman. Not just the immolation of live sacrifices pagan rite, but also both of the stinker movies about same. [makes motions to forfend against evil]
Dangerous, toxic, stupid, frightening, childish, asinine, smoky, swealtering, noxious, pointless, illegal, and really-bad-example-for-actual-children-who-might-be-present?
OK, so I took minor liberties with the word “word” on that last one, but that’s what hyphens are for!
1. the guy has a major farmer’s tan.
2. Why a picture of a guy in a Sonics jersey? why not a picture of a fire, possibly examples of previous “winterburn’s rockin new years eve” parties?
3. WTF is with the mask and cowboy hat?
4. Is he in the middle of dancing? seems like an odd pose.
I think he’s in the middle of poppin’. Because, you know, that’s cool or something.
One must admit: this guy has the perfect surname to match the apparent main event at his annual New Year’s Eve bash.
As the Black Plague spread through Sparkington, anything that could have been exposed to the deadly menace had to be burned. Meanwhile, Dan Winterburn started putting on his plague doctor’s outfit, piece, by piece, and practicing his dance to drive out the plague demons.
Nice mask. According to something we watched recently about superstitions, the bird-like appearance was a coincidence and the long beak was really just there to hold the aromatic wossnames.
As you were.
Oh damn! There goes the coffee spray on the computer screen. There is nothing like a good bubonic plague reference to get my morning going. Oh, hey. And muffin in my keyboard too.
Was it a good, crumbly, muffin?
With seeds and/or nuts that will just get under the keys?
But are just big enough to not shake loose, so, you really need a new keyboard?
Even though the one you have is broken-in just right, and they don’t make that keyboard anymore, so any replacement will be a lesser piece of hardware, and will require elbenty trips to stores with a bunch of PFKs who just-Don’t-Get-It nad are uncaring about how the world could be made a more caring, more happy, more satisfied place, with comradrie and fraternite and bonhomie–if only we’d just up and collect more ecologically-sensible flammables to expend in celebratory conflagration?
Dang, those would be good muffins . . .
Might just be my rural roots showing, but this sounds like a NYE party I want to be at. (And BTW, ever burned a Christmas tree? It’s alarming – once they catch, they go up with a disturbing “fwoomp” noise and are completely incinerated in no time.)
The bare arms worry me, though. Mr. Winterburn, you will live to regret it if you create a massive year-ending bonfire with highly flammable and toxic materials. Safety first, pal.
Only thing more exciting than that “What do you mean, did we change the water for the tree?” Whoompf, is when Spark’ has left mylar tinsel and a string or two of lights they couldn’t be bothered to remove.
Which makes for: Whoompf! Snap! Crackle! Pop! [toxic fumes] [broken glass] [melting cupric compounds] [melting pine resins and pitch] Oh My!
[OT] I’ve found something yummy to help Bacontini ring in the new year. [/OT]
Hey, Bacontini tink he dated a Bacon Sunday once. She was a nice enough beverage, but after a few weeks she started seeing a Steak Smoothie behind de Bacontini’s back. Tings ended kinda bitterly after Bacontini found out… and dey wouldn’t let him join in de meaty-meaty.
The scary thing is, he lives in an apartment, and is going to be torching things on his balcony. Better put Emergency Services on stand-by.
Well, as long as it’s not Bridgete’s apartment complex. Again.
WINTER NOT ON FIRE!
Yet.
That was the New Years that the Sonics lost their mascot, Paunchy Cowboy.
ARRRGGGGHHH! Kill it with fire!
Wait… that’s actually gonna happen this time. Cool.
I can only hope the fire department saw this before any fellow sparkies. Hmm… sparkies burning things, how well-named
offtopic: I baked a cake today!
it exploded
see?
maybe I shouldn’t be allowed to bake things
Have you considered adding “Torte brulés d’hiver” to your name <G>
Heh. Though it didn’t burn, at least it didn’t burst into flames and the cake itself (what stayed in the pan rather than going *FWOOP* all over the oven) was still edible.
Actually, I was more thinking, you could send your pudding al carbon to sparky-dan bruile d’hivre, above.
Not to suggest that you are a deliberate or habitual torte incinerator. As that assertion would be clearly slanderous and defamatory and unsupportable by either common or unique knowledge.
Oh no! Nothing sadder than baked goods that can’t be eaten.
IF, congratulations on just missing the 2012 record keeping session. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Winterburn Pub, Warley, Halifax!