YSaC, Vol. 1284: Not Craigslist edition
2012 June 28
Okay, it’s not from Craigslist. Sue me. Sarajean sent me this eBay ad a while ago, and I thought it deserved to be seen. I’m leaving out all the usual eBay nonsense and focusing on the bit that really matters.
Lovely Preety Words Stud Earrings 453
These would look great on a bruneete smoking a cigareete. Of course, she should be a clarineettist dueeting with a corneetist. Anything else would be gheeto. But don’t be unseetled; regreetably her largheeto was forgeetable, and she and her peeticoats piroueeted away peetily.
This post has been brought to you by a website that contains a list of all words that contain the letters “ett“. Why that website exists, I have no idea, but it sure came in handy today.
If only it were Words With “Ett” then we could have Etta James belt out torch songs . . . except my fickle mind, what little is left after a ludicrous quantity of sequential Mondays, will only offer up samples of Eartha Kitt. The latter being no musical slouch either, just not an “Ett.”
I’ll just guess that the target–egads, that would be a horrible pun–of this jewelry is that it is meant for those who “dress up” to go to Wal*Mart™.
Otherwise, I am left with a stereotypical mental image of the person wearing this item having hair color from a bottle, applied at home, without skill at the task, who also engages in reflexive incessant gum-popping while chain-smoking Galoise (since you caint git ’em cloves no maor), who embodies “rode hard and put away wet” an indeterminate number of years and rodeo ago. Who would not consider the implications in being given “peaty” or “petey” earrings, and would wear them for being “shiney” . . .
I may have spent too much of my like around hicks and (proto)hipsters . . .
I picture someone who has “Joocy” on their butt.
eBay currently has 302 listings for “preety,” or 538 if you search both title and description. The overwhelming majority have nothing to do with people whose actual first name is Preety. That’s preety unseetling.
I believe these are for the girlfriend of Canadian financial expert Preet Banerjee, author of the blog wheredoesallmymoneygo.com. Also, he’s a race car driver.
Where’s the chocker necklace to go with the errings?
I was thinking a mouth grill would compleete the look.
That’s “neckless,” Ralph. Sadly, I am not kidding – check eBay.
Yes, do check out eBay, Ralph. I really think you might enjoy it. (insert obligatory winky face here)
And while you’re at it, can you find me a hairloom seahell braclet with some decrotive cellulite churbs on it? I need some antic jewery to go with my breaded satan weeding dress.
This is one of those times I wish eBay wasn’t blocked on my work computer. Damn my boss for not letting me search for breaded satans!
They have some georgeous bearded stain ones too. Very shinny, not too much sequence.
Now, you stop yur ‘scriminatin’ agin the cervically-deprived. ‘Tain’t theys fault they ain’ gots no necks (nor nex) . . .
[oh, hello, that burst of leptons appears to be my spell-checker fleeing to Magrithea–go figure]
All I took from that was “Magrithea”.
Steempy! You eediot!
I actually bought a pair of these after I sent the ad in to the Llamanun (BBUH) and they look exactly like the picture.
You go, keety!
I didn’t realize that you still had faith in humanity.
Of course I don’t – I read fanfiction. But I was kinda hoping I’d get a pair that said “gorejuice” or something like that.
She probably doesn’t now …
Gasp! Now we know ghostcat’s seecreet ideentiteee!
Oh, dear; there goes all my carefully crafted mystique.
Say hello to my preety friend.
I feel preety
Oh so preety
I’ll make eerings
And sell them
Online!
And I piity
Any soul
Who buys from mee
Toonight
(And if you haven’t ever heard Little Richard cover that tune, you really owe it to yourself.)
Sadly, IF, I am out of time this morning for link clicking. (Whew!)
AH, see, you need the “linkey” errings (or the “cleecky” ones)
OT Bidniss: Ghostie is 3 for 4 this week, box-wise. She will probably set a new world’s record for not sucking.
When she’s hott, she’s hott!
Unless she’s hawt. Or haute.
Or given her tag…haunt 🙂
Ah do like me a stud who can say them preety words.
ghostie and Hips, Friday finally got here. Go forth and snark. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Preety Mades All Inna Row!