YSaC, Vol. 1239: I’ll take a La Vita Nuova with extra melancholy, please.
What if? – m4w – 22
Alone! As am I, as are you. Cold despite the warmth and easing into the comfort of a woolen sweater that is slightly too large and we have not an undershirt. But if we weren’t and if we did? What wonders we could attain! Each moment as breathless as space itself. Every lie believed and every secret kept. A moment apart, a sojourn to Mesault’s cell. Reunification; a thousand walls broken, a thousand “Ich bin ein Berliner!”‘s. Woe to the fool that wanders alone without Virgilian guide and without the consideration of Beatrice. Woe to me who will not be eating pizza and exchanging Get Hyphy t-shirts on the morrow! Except maybe I will order the pizza. But not! Not indeed! the one in the shape of a heart! Rather the unbroken ring of cheese filled crust that has no beginning and has no end much akin to my servility to Melancholy. Toppings mean nothing, if there is no sauce underneath. I am the cheese. And the cheese, the cheese stands alone.
Wait, I think I got this. I think what they’re saying is that they are finally facing up to the reality that East Germans wear ill-fitting clothes, and that the delivery girl Beatrice keeps stealing their pizza.
Thanks, EclecticBlue!
If I were awake at all, I’d be hungry.
William Shakespeare’s birthday was Tuesday, too.
This next sentence needs eight
Syllables for some reason.
Punch-drunk on fatigue am I
Facing an hour’s drive among idiots
And the uncaring;
To face employ of no great joy
And less satisfaction
(and of lucre, none at all).
I must needs will eschew
Nerdy reference to Foucalt–rebellion
Against Rene’s cartesian grid of streets
I am to traverse, perchance to
Such fate as awaits.
True Story: When my daughter Alexia was a teen, she and I had some difficult times. She asked me for some money one day, and as I could give it, I was getting it out, but I said jokingly, “Filthy lucre.” She burst into tears and said, “You’re always calling me names!” The entire family laughed at her, and very soon she was laughing as well. It became one of her favorite incidents to recall. 8)
Where are the syntax police when you need them? Sparky mixes Virgil with Robert Cormier, is looking for a Sparkette sans saucy, and brings us a shrubbery of mixed metaphors. Like yesterday’s thread, this needs a Macbeth reference: Cheese it! The copse!
FYI: SparkNotes.
Whoa, dude, that is so deep. I’m going to have to borrow that for my first-year comp class. (takes another hit) Oh, yeah, and “the cheese stands alone” is going to be my new catch phrase.
Waaaait a minute. How can the cheese stand alone if it doesn’t have any feet? Or maybe… duuuuuude! What if the cheese IS the feet? That would explain why it smells the way it does! OMG my mind, man, my mind has just been blown wiiiide open, maaaannn. This is some good stuff, where’d you get it?
As if.
Oh, Markov Chain Monte Carlo synthetic text, how I love you…
You simply cannot start a M4W listing with a wool sweater against bare skin analogy. Nope. It is just not done. I’m uncomfortable and sweaty at the outset of reading this.
And it starts to unravel from there. Here, Wanda, pull this string.
Unless it’s cashmere or one of those fluffy mohair ones that make you feel like you’re wearing a kitten.
How often do you wear kittens ghostie?
Depends on how flexible your definition of “kitten” is. Firefly has developed the “endearing” habit of jumping on my shoulders to show how much she loves me and will growl and dig in her claws when I try to remove her, but she’s not really a kitten anymore. She’s also more like a prickly scarf than a sweater.
Kittens make great earmuffs. Especially if you get them both purring.
Kid: Mr. Fox, How many moes does it take to make a mohair sweater that is slightly to large?
Mr Fox: Let’s find out. One, Two, Three…Chomp! nom nom nom… Three.
Anouncer: How many moes does it take to make a mohair sweater that is slightly to large? The world may never know.
There once was a stylish young moe,
who did his hair in a ‘fro.
the shearers, they came,
and he left them in shame.
Cuz a naked moe can’t get no mo’.
I’m in the middle of merging my household (and adult cat) into another household with 2 cats . I am wearing cathair right now from chin to toe.
Funny…”merging”. It was the most romantic word I could come up with over the growls and hisses.
“M4W”
What is that? Manky for Whorish?
“M4W”
What is that? Manky for Whorish?
Last time I went on the World Wide Web, I got propositioned by an L-Mactan.
I don’t wander to far from home anymore.
Oh my! I’ve been duped.
Herman Cain really needs to give up vying for a place in the GOP presidential race!
Ez-becky-becky-becky-stan, indeed!
This makes me think of Hamlet’s “To no or not to be” speech had Shakespeare been on shrooms.
Better yet, Benedick’s monologue from Much Ado About Nothing.
It’s from the little known sequel, “A F*$k-Ton More About Nothing.”
Two bees or not two bees?
Honey, that aint a problem.
A bee, by any other name
would still taste as sweet.
What flight through yonder window makes?
It is a bee!
That’s from Shakesbear’s “Much Ado About Honey”.
Sorry, got one of the quotes wrong. It should be “Hey! What flight through yonder meadow makes.”
My knowledge of the Ursine Bard is limited.
I caught myself a baby bumblebee;
Won’t my mommy be so proud of me?
I caught myself a baby bumblebee;
Ouch! It stung me!
I’m mashing up my baby bumblebee;
Won’t my mommy be so proud of me?
I’m mashing up my baby bumblebee;
Ewww, it’s all over me!
I’m licking up my baby bumblebee;
Won’t my mommy be so proud of me?
I’m licking up my baby bumblebee;
Mmm, it’s inside of me!
[topic veer]
So, I’m driving today, and stop at one of the three lights along my way.
There’s some sort of charitable organization which garners subscribers to help someone named Max.
In the modern way this is fashioned as “Mile 4 Max.”
The Lexus SUV with the magnetic signs proclaiming that the event is nigh, sadly, read somewhat differently:
[medium letters]April 28 2012
[really big letters]M4M
[small letters]Miles for Max
[back to topic]
That’s about as funny as the billboard I’ve seen. (I can’t remember which state or highway)
It says: HO MADE PIES!
Lovecraft needs to give up on the online dating thing.
This would make a kick-ass dramatic reading.
Or a kick ass-dramatic reading. I think Shatner could pull this one off too.
FM-are you suggesting a Shatnerification?
Congrats, Taco, for your extra large entry in the box today, and EB for the submission! Hooray!
Wohoo! Super thong time in the box!
*SNAP*
*JINGLY JINGLY JINGLY*
Oh boy. Glad that my honor doesn’t require me sharing the Box….. :-p
[corey] I’ve never heard of it, but apparently “Hyphy” is a real thing. (In the sense that it has a Wikipedia entry.) [/corey]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyphy
There’s a narrator on some nature show that reads in fragments as opposed to sentences. It’s not David Attenborough or Alex Baldwin; it’s a different man on a different series. It is SO distracting.
“And now. The majestic moose takes a stroll. Down to the water’s edge. Where he first tests for danger. By surveying his surroundings.” Arrrgh!
It’s “Wild Russia.” Beautiful cinematography, distracting narrator.
Yes, well. Moose are. Like that.
But, soft! what cheese doth Sparky speak today?
He is alone. As am I, as are you.
Arise, Sparkette, and steal the moldering cheese,
Who is already hard and crumbling away,
That thou her maid art far more sauce than cheese:
Be not her maid, since she is moldy;
Her outer crust is but sick and green
And none but fools do eat it; cast it off.
It is my pizza, O, it is my cheese!
O, that she knew she were!
Translation: I’m alone and I might order pizza. Please love me for my pretentious drivel.
This is what happens when lonely English majors get the munchies.
What happens when lonely English privates get the munchies? Doughnuts and bananas?
Oh wait, maybe thats lonely English primates.
And the hornies.
He’s Sparky on CL,
He’s Sparky on CL.
Oh no, He’s full of woe,
He’s Sparky on CL.
His sweater’s made of wool,
His sweater’s made of wool.
Oh no, it’s itching so,
His sweater’s made of wool.
He wants to order pie,
He wants to order pie.
A pizza pie so he won’t cry,
He wants to order pie.
What wonders we attain,
What wonders we attain.
If we were upon the spur,
What wonders we attain.
If we have no sauce,
If we have no sauce.
It matters not what is on top,
If we have no sauce.
The cheese stands alone,
The cheese stands alone.
I am the cheese you know,
The cheese stands alone.
“What if?”
What if? What if??!!
It’s IF. Now apologize to Mr. Fractal or he might not cover your band.
Cover your Band is IF’s Bjorn Again cover tribute cover band.
Taco, NOW it’s over. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Wild Russia!