YSaC, Vol. 1220: 3-Acrost has a tougher clue than 17-Dwon.

2012 March 30

huge mear and other mis stuff


i habe a huge mear mesures 5’4” in hight by 3′ acrost dont use havent used in years. it is heavy ans it is not in a frame just a big mear come get taking up space. a 6 pack of pepsi and dirt pepsi from the 90’s xnas design on them empty just dont wont any more and a 6 pack ou coaccola glass bottles form xmas 96 i believe in a holder small ones just dont wont any more come get it serious replys only. if add is listed i still have it. please no call me i wont the stuff if you wont it just email a day to come get it and we will figure it out from there

Now, far be it from me to point out the obvious – but is it really necessary to specify that you no longer want the thing you are selling? If you wanted it, isn’t it fair to assume that you wouldn’t be selling it? Conversely, doesn’t the fact that you are selling it necessarily mean that you don’t want it?

Also… dirt pepsi?

Thanks for the scary, that girl!

77 Responses leave one →
  1. 2012 March 30

    This guy’s English is terrible!

    But, his German isn’t half bad.

    Adores: 6
  2. 2012 March 30

    i wont the stuff if you wont it

    I feel that this could be the first line of a pretty decent song.

    Adores: 3
  3. 2012 March 30

    dont use havent used in years, hundreds of years. Email me fir mure info Count@Dracula.org

    Adores: 7
  4. 2012 March 30

    Ah dowent unnerstain whach teh prolbem is wif dis add? Mebbe iz jess meh.

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 30
      funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

      Yup, totally just “meh”.

      Adores: 0
  5. 2012 March 30

    Little known fact: The Mear is the first Moose/Bear hybrid ever found in the wild. Captive breeding programs have thus proven fruitless, though.

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 30
      Windrose permalink

      Although not for the bears. They rather enjoy it. The moose, not so much.

      Adores: 7
      • 2012 March 30
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        Well, no wonder the the captive breeding program was fruitless. The bees couldn’t get in to pollinate them.

        Adores: 3
  6. 2012 March 30

    Mear, mear, on the wall, which one of us is the most spelling-challenged of all?

    Adores: 7
    • 2012 March 30
      Digitalaxis permalink

      Go easy on him, his spell-checker exploded last week.

      Adores: 3
  7. 2012 March 30
    D / DM permalink

    huge mear [. . .] dont use havent used in years.

    I don’t think anyone has used it since reentry, and it’s likely not very safe to be around it, what with all the radiation. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ll take it!

    Adores: 5
    • 2012 March 30
      Tankerbell permalink

      Ooh, that could be cool, if he has a chunk of the Mir space station and he’s just spelling it wrong (what are the chances?). I could live in it and pretend I’m Peter Stormare in Armageddon! Actually, maybe that’s what Sparky is doing. That would explain the spelling; he’s trying to type with a Russian accent.

      Adores: 2
      • 2012 March 30
        Kaziganthi permalink

        Or the radiation fried too many brain cells!

        Adores: 0
  8. 2012 March 30
    funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

    “i habe a huge mear mesures 5’4” in hight by 3′ acrost ”

    She could be talking about Casey Mears. Them Nascar drivers are kind of short, but I don’t think Casey is quite 3′ acrost.

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 30

      He kinda let himself go these last few months…

      Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 30
      Tankerbell permalink

      Or maybe Indy car legend Rick Mears. I’d deal with this Sparky for Rick Mears. No matter what his current dimensions.

      Adores: 0
  9. 2012 March 30
    Gary permalink

    “and we will figure it out from there”

    Can I please have his contact info? I desperately need to figure this out.

    Adores: 4
  10. 2012 March 30

    I’m pretty sure Dirt Pepsi was introduced as a direct competitor against New Coke. It wasn’t as infamous though, because the name pretty much admitted what it tasted like, whereas New Coke took everybody by surprise.

    Also, “mear” sounds like a noise my cat makes.

    Adores: 6
  11. 2012 March 30

    Dirt Pepsi – still more successful than Crystal Pepsi.

    Adores: 7
    • 2012 March 30
      Digitalaxis permalink

      Ah, they should have gone directly to Cristal Pepsi

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 30

        I hear Crystal Meth Pepsi does very well.

        Adores: 5
        • 2012 March 30
          Digitalaxis permalink

          The shaking isn’t from the caffeine, though.

          Adores: 5
        • 2012 March 30
          D / DM permalink

          Enjoy Crystal Meth Pepsi, the crisp, clear way to keep the spiders away.

          Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 30
          P-Rex permalink

          What’s wrong with spiders? Specieist!

          Adores: 3
        • 2012 March 30

          Don’t make us get a Kleenex!

          Adores: 2
    • 2012 March 30
      funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

      Dirt Pepsi: Still more entertaining than Joe Dirt*.

      *Not true. Loved that movie. “Is this where you wanna be when Jesus comes back?!”

      Adores: 0
      • 2012 March 30
        Kaziganthi permalink

        I was thinking Dirt Pepsi was a ‘Joe Dirt’ promotional can of Pepsi.

        Adores: 0
  12. 2012 March 30
    Supreme Ruler permalink

    Buckwheat lives!

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 30
      funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

      And I bet he’s still wookin’ pa nub.

      Adores: 9
  13. 2012 March 30
    Digitalaxis permalink

    I keep reading “mear” as “smear”, which makes it all the more disturbing.

    Adores: 1
  14. 2012 March 30
    Digitalaxis permalink

    Last time I tried to email a day, the Time Lords got angry. Can I use a pickup truck to come get it instead?

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 31
      SilvaNoir permalink

      I think an entire day would exceed the limit of what I can e-mail. Maybe I could fit a half-an-hour, if I put it in a .zip file

      Adores: 1
  15. 2012 March 30
    Windrose permalink

    “other mis stuff”

    Dang, I’m a missus, so I can’t get involved. Good thing there’s nothing here I want.

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 30
      kelli permalink

      Windy, I think you can still buy it if you have really bad aim.

      Adores: 6
    • 2012 March 30
      One Moving Violation permalink

      Im Jess A. Sole hose in ten sins argued
      Olod, police doughn’t lech me Bea Miss Undie Stud.

      Adores: 7
  16. 2012 March 30
    kelli permalink

    Not to defend Sparky, but just because you are selling something doesn’t mean you don’t want the thing you are selling. There are a myriad of reasons you could be selling something including the ever popular need to pay bills.

    That said, I think dirt Pepsi was an attempt to compete with the Italian soda that Coke produces. The name escapes me, but it definitely tastes like dirt.

    Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 30
      Digitalaxis permalink

      I’ve been to the World of Coke in Atlanta, and the Italian drink called “Beverly” in their hall of international flavors was unabashedly horrid. Imagine mint Listerine mixed with Cherry Coke, and severely watered down.

      Adores: 0
      • 2012 March 30
        kelli permalink

        Beverly was the one I was talking about! I had it at the Coke World in Vegas in September. We all agreed it was dirt flavored and we began questioning Italian taste buds.

        Adores: 0
        • 2012 March 30
          Digitalaxis permalink

          Luigi, I have had too much good food, how will I ever enjoy your pasta risotto with veal and truffle sauce as it deserves?
          Giuseppi, take some of this horrible American drink. After that, even a plate of ashes will make your mouth sing with delight!

          Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 31

          San Pel Chinotto is pretty dirty.

          Adores: 0
    • 2012 March 30
      Rabbit Roulette permalink

      In the case of rabbits, sometimes you have to sell some you would rather keep just to free up cage space for new arrivals. I sometimes regret selling favorites so much I go and pay extra just to buy them back.

      Adores: 1
  17. 2012 March 30

    Dave and Ferret, you have a difficult task ahead of you today. You must keep the peace in the box, armed only with this piece of chalk and your ready wit. Good luck.

    Adores: 0
  18. 2012 March 30
    One Moving Violation permalink

    Lady on Tradio: Hello, I have seven pap smears I’d like to sell.
    DJ;What? You have what?
    LoT:Pap smears, My husband has been storing them in the garage. He passed away last year and I don’t want them anymore.
    DJ: Pap smears, you’re selling pap smears on the radio. Is this for real? Why would anyone try to sell pap smears?
    LoT: What do you mean?
    DJ: They’re PAP SMEARS lady. That’s pretty wierd.
    LoT: Not really, one has ducks on it, another has a moose, and another has geese, and elk.
    DJ: Oh, (laughs) I missunderstood. Well that makes sense then. Sorry folks.

    Adores: 1
  19. 2012 March 30
    One Moving Violation permalink

    5′-4″ and 3′ across guy: Psst, mear. yeah you, k’mear. I got these 6 packs of pepsi and coke products I want to sell you. I drank them all but the bottles are collector’s items.
    Selling empty bottles huh? You could maybe get a nickel apiece in some states, a dime in California.

    Adores: 0
  20. 2012 March 30

    Just the other day I drank a beer from the early 90’s. I think it was called SkünkenBräu.

    It wasn’t so good.

    Adores: 5
  21. 2012 March 30
    Irregular Fractal permalink

    Good to see Boomhauer finally clearing out the garage.

    Adores: 9
    • 2012 March 30
      Tankerbell permalink

      IF, I don’t care what cover band you’re touring with, I will be your groupie forever for that comment.

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 30

        But first you have to find a pair of sequined lederhosen that will fit a tank.

        Adores: 3
  22. 2012 March 30
    mud "" slicker permalink

    To quote the Cap’n: Words fail me…

    Adores: 0
    • 2012 March 30
      D / DM permalink

      No. Words failed Sparky. You, on the other hand, are just expecting too much of them.

      Adores: 1
      • 2012 March 30
        mud "" slicker permalink

        I mean Sparky could have grabbed a third grader off the street to help him with this ad and come out with something cleaner and more legible than this. Granted, he’d probably also be arrested by Chris Hansen*…but at least his ad would have made more sense.

        Mear, Mear is the big movie opening today, isn’t it?

        *anybody in the mood for some sweet tea?*

        Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 30

          I mean Sparky could have grabbed a third grader

          That was as far as my brain read before wandering off… then everything came to a screeching halt with a, “Wait, what?!”

          Adores: 3
  23. 2012 March 30
    grumpy grammy permalink

    What the he** is a mear? Since when did 5 year olds who can’t spell get to post on Criag’s list?

    Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 30
      D / DM permalink

      Who are you to tell us who can and can’t port on the Crag’s lisp?

      Adores: 2
  24. 2012 March 30

    OT Just want to let everyone know, in case you aren’t already my friend on Facebook, you can actually friend me! No, really! Look for Demi Hungerford, and tell me who you are on here. I won’t stalk you, I will get to know you. No, really. 8) *parks the windowless van around the back of the lounge.

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 30

      She’s got awesome candy, though it makes me kinda sleep… zzzzzzzzzzzzz

      Adores: 5
    • 2012 March 30
      tigprincess permalink

      Hi Windrose – if you get a facebook friend request from Corralejo its me!

      Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 30
      Kaziganthi permalink

      Friend request sent, I am the black hat on the lattice.

      Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 30
      One Moving Violation permalink

      I’m the One with the nekkid scalp.

      Adores: 1
      • 2012 March 31
        Windrose permalink

        Hooray, new friends! 8)

        Adores: 0
  25. 2012 March 31
    Concerned Momn permalink

    Although I find poor spelling /grammar intolerable, when I read this, I see someone with a learning disability. My daughter is 3 years behind in reading and spelling and would probably write something such as this. I don’t find it funny. I find it sad. This person may not have someone in their lives to help them. Also, sorry, I don’t mean to get up on my high horse and scold. I just think there is always two sides to everything.

    Adores: 0
    • 2012 March 31
      Windrose permalink

      Dear Concerned Momn, we get it. We totally get it. We would never do this if there was a chance the person involved would know about it. Or be hurt by it. In real life, we are a secret band of super heroes who help the less fortunate. We come here to chill out and get some relief from our daily worries.

      As long as your daughter knows how to use spell check, everything should be fine. 8)

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 31
        Concerned Momn permalink

        Thanks for your reply. Obviously, the fact I’m on your site, indicates I see the humour in it too. But every once in a while I worry it’s gonna be my kid on one of these sites. You can appreciate how that would make you feel. She will learn how to use spell check – or I will help her. Thank you.

        Adores: 0
        • 2012 March 31
          drmk permalink

          Concerned Momn, I totally get your concern … and in fact, we frequently don’t post things that feel to us like someone has a disability of some kind, or is just a result of someone being a second language speaker, because we don’t feel like making fun of that is funny at all. If I tried to write in Spanish, for example, it would be (mostly) the right words in the wrong order with the wrong verb conjugations — so that kind of thing isn’t snarkworthy for me.

          Similarly, I won’t claim to be an expert on learning disabilities, or their effect on spelling/writing (although I do encounter both of these things fairly regularly in my day job), but this ad didn’t (and still doesn’t) seem to me to be the result of a disability.

          Also, we try very hard not to resort to commentary that just consists of “HA HA you’re stupid because you spelled mirror wrong!”. We try to ensure that we’re making fun of the ad, not the person. We don’t always succeed in that, and I’ll be the first to admit it — but it really is part of the intent of the site.

          I do appreciate you reading, and commenting.

          Adores: 1
  26. 2012 March 31
    Windrose permalink

    Sister Lyle, please give Dave and Taco these for me: Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Atlanta!

    Adores: 0

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