YSaC, Vol. 1213: Won’t you take me, too, funky chair?

2012 March 21
by drmk

FREE wood ‘Ikea’ desk and funky chair


I need to get rid of an Ikea desk that has three working drawers and a large, top surface. Has been modified by user (top enlarged).

I will throw in an excellent, little chair too!!

FREE FREE FREE

sorry, you must pick up

 

There’s nothing better than pictures that provide no sense of scale or proportion. As far as I can tell, the bottom drawer is as large as the word “Back” on the phone. And I would like to go ‘back’ on the phone — back before Sparky took these pictures and then came up with the brilliant idea of taking pictures of the pictures.

I thought about taking a picture of the pictures of the pictures, but then I realized it would eventually turn into the Infinite Cat Project. The “Infinite IKEA desk project” just didn’t have the same glamorous ring to it, though.

Thanks, Shawn!

 

54 Responses leave one →
  1. 2012 March 21

    So “modified” translates into “I put a piece of poster-board on top, ta-da!” in Sparkese?

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 21
      funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

      I’ve “modified” quite a few things in my day. I modified my old love seat til I had to go buy a new one. The cats helped.

      Adores: 7
  2. 2012 March 21
    valarie permalink

    “Top enlarged”.
    *snicker*

    Adores: 7
    • 2012 March 21

      Heading to the corner early today, aren’t we, Valerie?

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 21
        valarie permalink

        Yes’m. My inner child adolescent escaped.

        Adores: 5
  3. 2012 March 21
    CapnMac permalink

    If this “desk” follows Sparkii rules of ‘draw’ quantity;
    And x = 3 working;
    How many draws are not-working?

    Discuss. Include consideration of how Hapsburg fiscal policy shaped modern macro-economics viz-a-viz social policy and government-paid Unemployment. Correlate with a coefficient of pelagic food-fish and Ikea’s impact on biodiversity in feline playtoys. Show all work, including citations ot self-written wiki. 5 points.

    Adores: 9
    • 2012 March 21

      I’m going to wait for my brother to get here before coming up with an answer that doesn’t involve bashing my head repeatedly against the wall in hopes of enlightenment.

      Adores: 2
      • 2012 March 21
        One Moving Violation permalink

        I suggest waiting for further plot complications before taking any corrective measures.

        Adores: 4
  4. 2012 March 21
    One Moving Violation permalink

    I have an earworm now, funky earworm.

    Adores: 5
  5. 2012 March 21
    One Moving Violation permalink

    I have a desk with three funky drawers and a working chair.

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 21
      valarie permalink

      Are they naturally funky or have they been modified by user?

      Adores: 5
      • 2012 March 21
        funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

        Hey! “Funky” is not necessarily a BAD thing. Come on!

        Adores: 5
        • 2012 March 21
          valarie permalink

          Ooops! My bad. You are correct.
          *fish goes back to bottom feeding*

          Adores: 5
      • 2012 March 21

        And does it have an artificially enhanced top?

        Adores: 3
        • 2012 March 21
          funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

          I want to get an artifically enhanced top but Hubby argues that my top is just fine.

          Adores: 10
        • 2012 March 21
          One Moving Violation permalink

          Your hubby is right, as long as you got outies instead if innies, you’re good. I mean AWESOME. Monkey is awesome. I know, because she told me.

          Adores: 5
        • 2012 March 21
          funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

          Ouch! *thinking about innies on top*

          Adores: 8
        • 2012 March 21

          AHHH!

          Now I’m thinking about it, too!

          Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 21

          Corner, all of you!

          Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 21
          One Moving Violation permalink

          Awww.!

          *casts eyes toward floor*
          *eyes bounce a couple of times then begin rolling*
          *suddenly, mongoose darts from under snarkalounger and snatches left eye*
          *mongoose sneaks up on couch with eye held gently in teeth*
          *mongoose sets eye on floor a few feet in front of couch*

          Mongoose: c@@@@@@ c@@@@ c@ c@@@@ c@@.

          *snake slithers out from under cushion on couch*

          Snake:*hisses* miiiiy eeeeeggg!
          Mongoose:*jumps up and down* Trick trick trick!

          *mongoose pounces on snake killing it instantly*
          *mongoose prances across room to trash receptacle and tosses snake in*
          *mongoose returns eyes to OMV*
          *gives mongoose a good ear scritching*

          At least I’m good for something around here.
          *mumbles* bet they’re sorry they threw me down the stairs now.

          Adores: 3
  6. 2012 March 21
    LimeLolly permalink

    It doesn’t say what the three drawers were working at, but if it requires a large, flat top surface…I think that’s illegal in most states.

    No wonder the chair is a little funky.

    Adores: 8
    • 2012 March 21
      valarie permalink

      He never did say why he “needs” to get rid of this. What sordid endeavors occurred on that surface, I wonder.

      Adores: 5
    • 2012 March 21
      One Moving Violation permalink

      I believe it’s still legal in the state of Anarchy. Most things still are.

      Adores: 1
  7. 2012 March 21
    kelli permalink

    I like the second picture where Sparks has the desk turned around as if it is being punished.

    Adores: 6
    • 2012 March 21
      valarie permalink

      It is just ashamed to show its drawers.

      Adores: 7
    • 2012 March 21
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      Corner?

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 21

        We just put some new, funky chairs in. The corner is getting pretty groovy.

        Adores: 3
  8. 2012 March 21
    valarie permalink

    Sorry, you must pick up! My whole place gets very funky if I don’t pick up occasionally.

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 21
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      Fellas, I’m ready to get up and sell my desk (yeah go ahead!)
      I wanna take pics of it, man, you know (go ahead!)
      Like a, like a large top surface, man, (yeah go ahead!)
      Turnin’ it around, you know
      Can you clear it off? (Go ahead)

      One, two, three, four!

      Pick up, (pick on up)
      Pick up, (pick on up)
      Ikea desk, (pick on up), and a funky chair, (pick on up)

      Adores: 6
      • 2012 March 21
        MandaB permalink

        I regret that I have but one door to give for that, IF!

        Adores: 3
  9. 2012 March 21

    (types “When can I pick up?” in OpenOffice Writer)

    (takes picture of screen with cell phone)

    (sends picture by MMS to Sparky)

    Adores: 9
    • 2012 March 21
      valarie permalink

      Sorry…Rogers phones do not accept MMS.

      Adores: 3
      • 2012 March 21
        One Moving Violation permalink

        I’ve got an Adroit II Smart-ass phone. That’s where I get most of my material.
        But some times it just tells me to shut up and let it do the commenting.

        Adores: 5
        • 2012 March 21

          What a smart ass-phone.

          Adores: 3
  10. 2012 March 21

    Well, based on today’s title, someone has to do it, right?

    *clears throat*

    Got an improved table
    that’s just not right for me.
    Take it; I’m not movin’
    just don’t want it anymore, you see.

    Well, if you can lift if
    You can have it
    You can take it
    Take it from me.

    Take the table
    Take the table
    It comes with a chair.

    Gotta cool chair
    Gotta cool chair
    Gotta cool chair

    Won’t you take it, too?
    Funky-chair!
    From Ikea, it’s new!
    Funky-chair!
    Not a single loose screw!
    Funky-chair!
    I used Krazy-Glue!
    Funky-chair!

    Adores: 9
  11. 2012 March 21

    FREE wood

    Hey, I used to have that sign on my pants!

    I’ll be in the corner.

    Adores: 6
    • 2012 March 21
      valarie permalink

      Pull up a groovy chair, TM. The coffee slices are good today.

      Adores: 2
  12. 2012 March 21
    Gary permalink

    This is a twofer. It has all the qualifications to be listed at Apostrophe Abuse too.

    Adores: 2
  13. 2012 March 21
    Digitalaxis permalink

    But where is the little chair? That’s just another table with posterboard slapped on the top.

    Adores: 3
  14. 2012 March 21
    One Moving Violation permalink

    We gotta find that chair.
    It’s funky, It’s groovy, It knows where it’s at.
    Sparky didn’t tell us where it’s at.
    He’s gotta funk of a different color.
    He don’t know where his desk is at.

    Adores: 5
  15. 2012 March 21
    One Moving Violation permalink

    I didn’t need a bigger top. The drawers however could have been modified from working models to sports models.

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 21

      With the enlarged top it might qualify as a super model.

      Adores: 8
      • 2012 March 21
        funky "looking innuendo" monkey permalink

        See! What did I tell ya! I am SO getting some augmenting done.

        Adores: 2
        • 2012 March 21
          One Moving Violation permalink

          I’m stalking you today FM, I hope the augmentation you are refering to is bigger binoculars.

          Adores: 1
        • 2012 March 21

          The best bet would be in real estate. You can increase your HUUUUUUGE… tracts of land.

          Adores: 5
  16. 2012 March 21
    Ralph permalink

    Three working drawers, three working drawers,
    See how they open, see how they open,
    They all were used in Sparky’s life
    He expanded the top with a carving knife
    Three working drawers.

    Nope, doesn’t scan.

    Adores: 8
    • 2012 March 21
      Windrose permalink

      Insert:

      Would you ever buy such a desk in your life?

      With three working drawers.

      Adores: 7
    • 2012 March 21
      One Moving Violation permalink

      Ralph, is that supposed to be sung to the tune of “Three blonde mice”?

      Adores: 3
  17. 2012 March 21

    I wonder how many other Sparkies have contacted this guy about the phone he’s selling…

    Adores: 2
  18. 2012 March 21

    ‘Ikea’ desk

    I shudder to consider the quality of IKEA knockoff furniture…

    Though the instructions can’t get any worse, so maybe it’ll be easier to assemble.

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 March 21

      It’s probably written in Swedish Chef for authenticity.

      Poot dooel A intu Sucket B. Teeghtee Ellee noot veet sooppleeed vrench. Repeet fuoor teemes unteel ell dooels ere-a ifenly speced. Feenish veet dooct tepe-a und puster-buerd. Sell oon Creeegslist. Bork Bork Bork!

      Adores: 6
      • 2012 March 21
        One Moving Violation permalink

        I’m disturbed. I actually understood that.

        Adores: 1
  19. 2012 March 22
    Windrose permalink

    Sis, I so like these early morning (for me) talks we have. Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Nevada!

    Adores: 0

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