YSaC, Vol. 1203: Chain of Fuels
2012 March 7
Man.. what did I DO last night? I’ve really got to remember that mixing tequila and paint thinner is a poor life choice. OK, don’t panic, maybe I didn’t post anything to Craigslist this time.
wanted old fuel pump – $1
old fuel pump wanted if you have a couple would restore one for a pump but if not would just restore one for you i do them in and out quality is a must i guarantee will do other items also old you see what these shops get too restore items there out of there tree i am reasonableyou may call ### ### ####
Dan
I have GOT to stop doing this. I still haven’t figure out what to do with the wheelbarrow full of carburetors from LAST time.
Thanks for staging the intervention, Taco!
Why don’t have a homonym harmony tag? I’m sure it might come in handy from time to time. And why is #1203 between #1201 and #1202 on the main page?
It’s a TRAP!!
We do the Time Warp on Wednesday.
Time Warp Wednesday is almost as much fun as Tittie Twisting Thursdays.
*bends over and grabs edge of desk, readying self for Taco’s spanking*
What about TacoThong Tuesdays?
I think I’ll see you guys on Friday.
And Fur Flinging Fridays?
EDIT: D’oh! I posted that before I saw OMV’s. You’re welcome to join us on Fridays, One. But I’d recommend wearing goggles and carrying one of them lint roller thing-a-ma-bobbers.
I get the impression that no day is safe around here.
(Of course Noday is the eighth day of the week, the only day I get any rest.)
You guys are getting really demanding. Now you want things to be in numerical order? Sheesh.
If you have a couple, try Viagra first to restore the pump before you let Sparky in and out.
Pump up the post
Pump it up
Cuz it’s out of order
And the post is slumpin’
Look above the counter needs jumpin’
Pump it up a little more
Get the post goin’ below the header
See ’cause that’s where the party’s at and you’ll Find out if you do that
You see?! That right there is why YSaC is one of the most dank and sordid porn sites on the net!
Look out folks! Tasty Taco is now the Ethics Police! He totally spanked me yesterday for being nasty.
Damn straight I am! YSaC keeps losing all their sponsors because of all the filth that keeps being posted on here.
I have to pound it into everyone that we need to strive toward a more socially acceptable website. I know that many don’t really like it when I thrust the point home, but really we won’t get any better unless I keep banging on this problem. This issue must be brought to task, and that requires a firm grasp of the situation and the will to enter into a new era.
Heaven knows we don’t need another Taco pounding. I think you’ve really driven the point home. I appreciate your willingness to stand firmly and defend the site from this type of smut. It takes real courage to proudly declare that you are a monkey spanker and aren’t afraid to take control with your own two hands. I think we all appreciate your grasp of the situation. Thanks for being such a hands-on member of this site!
Brag, brag, brag.
Funky Monkey saw some porn.
E I E I O!
Tasty Steaks took her to task,
E I E I O!
With a spank, spank here,
and a spank, spank there.
Here a spank, there a spank.
Everywhere a spank, spank,
Funky Monkey saw some porn.
E I E I O!
The Tasty Steaks line should probably be:
Tasty sent her to the corner.
This ad does seem to read like some pornish game then?
OMV: Your “pornish game then” to me read like “cornish game hen” and now I’m hungry.
Now I’m imagining porn involving cornish game hens. Your work here is done, FM. Well played.
I’m a helper!
Then my porn pun was successful.
And hoping that we never see YSaC-memed Rule 34 . . .
Pr0nish game hens; vintage cereals; vintage crisco; snake-filled auntie couches; haunted dolls and raptors–all set around winter bagels and swingsets and bedazzled “bits” . . . .
There, there tree. There, there.
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.
Ralph, I hope you enjoy your day in the box, and please feel free to clear the junk off the new cabinets. Didn’t know they would arrive with all the clutter still attached.
The odd coincidence is that I’m getting new countertops installed tomorrow. I have plenty of my own junk ready to put on them.
The even odder coincidence is that Ralph submitted that ad. I think he was holding back on us, saving his good one-liner until we posted it.
Hmmm. I have my doubts about that. I’m fairly certain there is no reasonable me.
(Is reasonableyou the sequel to despicable me?)
I think that yuproablti right.
Indescribable You
Irreplaceable You….
Well, I’m no mechanic, but I believe you restore a vehicle. The individual parts, you rebuild.
Unless Sparky means a gas station pump, but I don’t know anyone who just has those laying around the house.
Oops – Looks like I also shouldn’t huff cardamom while posting to YSaC. Date error fixed.
When the zipper breaks on the only pair of dress slacks that still fit, cardamom is the only worthy crutch. And maybe, fennel.
Hey Dan, BBUY,
We missed you at the last T&PT Anonymous meeting last week.
..and you were soooo close to your one month token too.
.,,,….?!. . There you go Sparky, the punctuation you need. Please install these where they belong.
Once you have that done, you will need to replace some letters with these. OIIQIYTIY
You’re not done yet, swap these out for their counterparts. to, They’re, their.
.s don’t belong at the beginning of sentences, I know, but I doubt Sparky knows that.
Shush.
Yoda has gone deciduous!
he seems evergreen to me
Yoda tree i am
Forested one of the force
Green up your bottom
I don’t know why, but reading this lovely haiku aloud is making me laugh so hard I’m crying.
I are fuel, fuel I are.
Will you pump me Spark you are?
I will pump you in your car.
I will pump you near and far.
I will pump you if you’re old,
I will pump your manifold.
I will pump you in and out,
I will pump you so don’t pout.
I will pump you when you’re treed.
I will pump you, guaranteed.
I can pump with quality,
I can ‘ump without a P.
Would I, could I pump a dish?
Even twice pump if you wish.
Can I pump you fuel I are?
I can pump you, Spark you are.
-Dr. Pseus
A few questions:
1.) Fuel pump fuel pump fuel pump
b.) You would restore a fuel pump for a fuel pump? Ok…
iii.) “Quality is a must”… my fuel pump, or your repair service?
pi.) “…there out of there tree” What?
FOUR.) “will do other items also old you” No thanks.
Old me is as uninterested as young me.
A few Answers:
1.) Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse
c.) Get a time machine and you could drive him nuts…
• ) Different kinda service being sought here – see rule 34
cake) When one’s family tree is a spiral this sentence makes much more sense.
IV) Mxyzptlk (what you wanted all this to make sense?)
Awesome! Since I only have one old fuel pump, and you are going to restore it just for li’l old me, can you turn it into a chocolate dispenser?
*e-mails dollar bill, waits by mailbox*
Ralph, you may go, but first! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Tequila Sunrise!