YSaC, Vol. 1151: Here’s Georg, but what happened to Yortuk?
To have loving – m4w – 32 (Middle of City)
Are you nice and want for to have sex with foreign guy? I stay in the middle of ####### City for one month at hotel by blue bear. I visit for business but always I look for the nice love. If you are nice faced woman write me your number or look for me in downtown Hyatt. I have wide chest and am loud.
Please know photograph is not of me. It is dead general I admire.
Hello ladies! I am blog writer! Are you nice and for want to have sex with me? Don’t tell llama-nun, but I am looking for the nice love. Or maybe you want to have nice love with ostrimu AND llama-nun? I do not have wide chest, but am very loud!
OK, enough of that. Two more facts of interest:
1. The name of the city in which Borat here is staying does NOT actually contain the word “city.” That was extra.
2. The photograph turns out to be the former second in command of Russian Military Intelligence (Also known as the GRU.) who was found mysteriously dead this summer on a Turkish beach. I swear I am not making this up.
Thanks for the link, Ashley!
(Update: Drmk has just informed me that I will be found dead on a Turkish beach if I follow through with this.)
But everyone looking for the nice love at the hotel by the blue bear has a wide chest and is loud.
Um, or so I’ve read. I’ll be here in the corner by the green wolf in case anyone needs me.
Dave…does green wolf make for nice with ferret tribe?
Are we sure the general is dead? Maybe the Russians just leaked the story so that he could start a new life with a new identity and meet a nice faced woman in middle of ########## City! And create lots of kids with different moms, some of whom will help him in his drug and prostitution rings, and one who will come back and kill him because he used to beat up her mom. . . oh, wait.
Circuit City is not for counting there, Boris.
I have small chest (need big styrofoam balls) but all the dead generals say my nice face make up for that.
That’s OK, Valarie – I have a large chest (six drawers, with a mirror on top) and I can assure you, it isn’t the size, it’s what you put in it.
My mother warned me about French perventals like you!
Damn! All I have is a chest of drawers.
Is it hexagonal?
What is this “chest of drawers”? Do you mean Chester Draws?
“Hey big, strong, handsome man! Me like you; you very handsome. Me love you long time. You like? We go, O.K.?” – Urban Dictionary
*pout* You stole my comeback Lolly. ‘Cept I would have spelled it “Me ruv you rong time!” There, at least I got it out of my system.
If all online dating posts were required to include a picture of a dead general admired by the poster, instead of one of the poster themselves, it would make it much easier to find someone compatible*.
*Weed out the crazies.
Oh, to be honest, I could make a better man out of duct tape and nacho cheese than most of the men on dating posts. My gay fish agrees, he does the weeding for me.
If you’re a good hooker, I’ve got a crochet pattern that makes a pretty nice man.
Why for am I in corner with wolf covered in ferrets? Is what crocheters are called!
So Taco is a hooker? It must have something to do with the Taco thong.
How do you think he could afford something with that much bling?
A new post? On a Saturday? It’s a Nerky Beesmas miracle!
(Or Dan and I just lost track of what day it was while we’re on vacation.)
Either way … Nerky Beesmas to all!
And thank you both for it! It was a pleasant gift!
Many bees upon you both! Enjoy your vacation!!
Yay! Bees! Vacation! Nerky Nerky Beesmas to all!
Based on picture and writing of English languages, this might be a red bear with blue balls.
I am located in corner for business for short time. Would like to meet pretty coffee slice for “hot kuchen”, or maybe blintz… Please to send telephone number and size of your mug.
Well, hey there
sailorsoldierrandom creeper. 😉I have a hobo in a sock who might be interested in this.
Does anyone else have a pop up in the lower right corner that purports to be “Other Sucking You Might Like”?
Oh, Thank You, Holy Llama-nun and Ostrimu! PrOn for Beesmas!
Yes. I was ignoring it. I’ve had spiked eggnog, and it just sounds dirty *blush*
I’m glad you said this. I have a blocker thingie so I don’t see it at home, only at work. I thought it had gone away. My only complaint was that I couldn’t move it somewhere out of my way or close it, and whenever I clicked on it, Taco showed up.
I generally have a complaint when I can’t move Taco out of the way, too.
I want four two, too…
Doing my daily clicking. ‘Cause I know Santa’s watching.
*click click click*
Oh yeah. You like that, don’t ya? Talk dirty sponsorship to me. Ooooo, yeeeaaaaaa….
Oh, wicked, bad, naughty Monkey!
Click me!
A Spanking! A Spanking!
Nerky Beesmas Eve!
Up near the Kremlin Lenin rots
Out jumps good old Gorbachev
Out to Siberia go lots of young
All for a little slip of the tongue
No, no, no! I wouldn’t go!
No, no, no! I wouldn’t go!
Put up in chains, click, click, click
Down to the dungeon with ol’ Tsar Nick
Alas poor Yortuk, I viewed his fellatio, and now how abhorr’d in my imagination it is! My gorge rises at it.
Alas, poor Yortuk! I knew him well, Horatsevich,
A fellow of infinitely split preposition, and mien most fancy.
He hath hosteled many the night in ******* City, and
How abhorrent his late brow is now.
Here hung those lips unkisst by nice faced woman,
None know how oft (and shudder us thus in enumeration).
Where is your bear, blue, now? Where gibes thy
Hyatt? Your business meetings with continental breakfasts?
No, now we also mark your cheek crest-fallen,
As if to mock your CL longings!
Anon, Horatsevich, call the lady to ‘er chamber, there
To lay the foundation an inch deep, ere to this
Bear come she thus.
Pray prithee, Horatsevich, doth ye think [asian gentelman]
Looked so meek and alone as dear Yortuk here?
Aye, Sire, e’en so.
And, smelt so rank?
Indeed, Sire, as a sow’s designer purse left at the starbucks.
An imperialist plot to besmirch the Rodhina, and sore
Oppress the Proletariat Workers with the Caffeine inherent
In the System!
Curst; a jinx laid on, most palpable jinx; Wine, then for honorable Ralph!
You’ll shoot your eye out, Cap’n!
Never has a thread sounded so drunk so early. Well done crew!
Drews hunk? I reshmemble thash!
Nerkey Beesmas to all, and to all a Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Virginia!