YSaC, Vol. 1138: It’s a Dead Man’s Party.
Medical Billing
Looking for a part time (two day a week) person with a medical billing/insurance background.
Basic secretarial/reception with experience faxing, filing, typing, and phones is also preferred. Must be an up beat friendly person with a séance of humor.Pay is $12 an hour. Duration of job is 4 months, with the possibility of continuing.
Qualified applicants please submit a resumes.
See, this is why the 99% are Occupying Everything. The greedy insurance companies are even trying to collect money from the DEAD now.* Look, you can put away the crystal ball now — I don’t care how nicely you ask, my grandmother is not going to give Dionne Warwick here her credit card number from beyond the grave.
Thanks for the submission, Mary!
*Actually, apparently they’ve been doing it for a while.
Hello,
I am responding to your posting for a position with your insurance company. I have many years experience swindling money out of the baffled masses. I also have extensive practice contacting spirits from beyond the grave. If this sounds like the person you’re looking for, I would love to speak with you.
Sincerely,
JZ Knight
Ramtha’s School of Enlightenment
Yelm, Washington
References Available. Please call for appointment.
This might be that Sparky from LoD who had the fuzzy funicular.
Why does Ramtha look like she should have saved up for the quality lip injections, and not that person who shoots cement into your ass?
Who you gunna call?
Ghost doctors!
I am feeling poorly today – maybe I should go visit the ghost vet.
Maybe they can prescribe some phantom pain killers.
Ghostie, you changed your photo! It is a nice kitteh.
Valarie, where’s Mike, the gay fish??
Seance humor is probably better than gallows humor.
hmm, classical medicine gives us the four humours of Hot, Dry, Wet, and Cold. These expressed through Blood, Black & Yellow Bile, and Phlegm.
Now, the last ‘qualified’ medicos have long since joined the choir invisible and are whistling up fjords and causing mø0s bits on sisters. So, a seancé might be apt, if one wanted Galen to consult.
Hmm, my medical coding class did not include how to ‘cost’ a ‘consult’ from beyond the grave . . .
Perhaps grave bowels are needful?
Send resumes so I can apply, thx.
“Psychic Passing Acquaintances’ Hotline, this is Luxor the Magnificent speaking.”
“Hi, Luxor, this is Sparkinetta from Dr. Sparkington’s office. Can you see into the future to resolve a staffing issue that we’re having?”
“Certainly. Luxor the Magnificent senses that your office has issues with medical billing and proofreading. Do you have wonky speech-to-text software, and does someone in your office have a bit of a drawl?”
“Yes! How did you know?”
“Luxor the Magnificent knows all.”
Eenie-meanie, chili-beanie, the spirits are about to speak……..Bullwinkle.
Are they friendly?
“Bullwinkle”? hhm, pray tell, where is our fave poncho moose?
A seance of humor?
I’m gonna go up there, and knock ’em dead! But seriously, folks, I know people who would kill for this gig!
Séance of Humor is my new Comedy Central show starring, Dom DeLuise, John Belushi, Richard Pryor, Sam Kinison, George Burns, and George Carlin.
Hosted by, John Edward.
I cannot adore that enough.
Ditto what the Taco said.
LOVE this! I miss Dom 🙁
Will Mr. Carlin tell us the 7 words that cannot be said on the “Other Side” ?
1) Love
2) Peace
3) Christmas
4) Serentiy
5) God
6) Happy
7) Jesus
Oh, you mean the other, other side…
I thought it was the Ouijas that sang “Staying Alive.”
The Ouijas are IF’s Grateful Dead tribute band.
Times have been tough for Miss Cleo. I think I’ll give her a thought about this job.
__________________XXX
Apparently, the line is busy. Too bad, she’d of been perfect.
I went to a seance of humor once. A dead uncle hit me in the face with a banana cream pie.
If you are here give us a sign…
*Buh-dump-bump*
Yup, that’s uncle Charlie.
“I’m getting a C name. Charles, Conner, Clark…”
“Uncle Charlie!”
“Yeah, that could be it. He’s asking something about one of your appliances. Probably your fridge. He wants to know if it’s running.”
“Uh… yeah, it was when I left anyway.”
“Charlie is saying that you should go catch it.”
At last, I know how to describe the men I date who aren’t funny: seance of humor. Thank you, Sparky!
And thanks again for another ’80s-earworm title!
Duration of job is 4 months. If still alive after that, we may keep you on.
And if you die we’ll keep you on as a ghost writer, you’ll urn a lot more too.
Darn, we’re missing a huge market for our Coding and Billing course! I’ll tell Marketing to print up some flyers for the nearby graveyards….
Is there an age limit on the course? How many years dead do you have to be to work here?
…does not inspire much confidence in that Doctor’s office. I mean, if they regularly collect from the dead…