YSaC, Vol. 1062: It’s the root of all evil today.
revaluationary war prints,very cool x2 – $25
cool old pics in original frames with old store tages still on back. call ONLY xxx-xxx-xxxx thank you
The Revaluationary War took place when half of the country decided that 5 actually equaled 2.* (This was an early predecessor to cat math.) The war lasted either nine months or 3.6 months, depending on who you asked, and resulted in a loss of 6,000 (or 2,400) troops.
These items have been priced historically accurately, as according to the Revaluationary Army, $25 would actually be equal to $10; this is about twice as much as what they’re probably actually worth, which is the going rate for a quoted price in a Craigslist ad.
Interestingly, the Revaluationary Army never drummed up interest in their cause; this was caused by a deflation of their ability to get their assets in gear. Ultimately, nobody depreciated them, and the army returned to their unsecured capital without any gains.
* This isn’t as far-fetched as it may seem — don’t forget, Indiana once tried to legislatively change the value of pi to 3.2, 4, or approximately 3.4 all within the same bill.
“very cool x2 ”
I want that on a tee shit.
You want a shirt that just says “very cool, very cool”?
I’d buy that.
Nope. I want it word for word “very cool x2”. But then pervs would think I’m talking about my hooties, wouldn’t they? Sigh.
Pervs? Yeah, pervs. Them. I – ooh look a corner!
How about “I’m so cool I’ve lost toes to frostbite.”
I’m so cool, it’s difficult to maintain water in a liquid state in my vicinity.
I’m so cool that frost forms on me. Nitrogen frost, that is.
“I’m so cool, you could keep a side of beef in me for a month.”
Oooooh Smedley had to go to the corner!!!
I’m so cool, Pluto uses me to stop its drinks from warming up.
I’m so cool my entropy has reached its minimum value.
I’m so cool I make Absolute Zero look like a zero.
I’m so cool that Kelvin looks at me and says, “Woah, you’re pretty cool.”
I was cool before it was cool.
Bacontini so cool, he refreshing.
I’m so cool my boogers are frozen.
Too gross?
FM, I don’t think that’s too gross. If Calvin measures how cold it is by whether his boogers freeze, I think the rest of us can do so. Just be careful when you get home – a tiger may be waiting behind the door to pounce.
I’m so cool I’ve been banned from twelve zoos for causing premature hibernation.
I’m so cool I delayed global warming by 50 years.
Smedley went to the corner? Smedley also sent my brain to the corner in a hot second!
Side of beef in …
I’m so cool you’ve never heard of me.
I.Am.So.Cool
I wish I was cool. I’m just hawt!
I’m so cool — (How cool are you?) I’m so cool they named a frozen dessert after me on Mars!
Psst, FM, you left out a letter there. Ew.
That was (probably) intentional. It’s a TacoTypo-ism that we’ve adopted as a meme.
I’ll buy that for a dollar!
Xenia Recordia, Keeper of Figtail Fiefings and Revaluationary War Artifact Collector
Man, American history is awesome – we get land quarrels, long walks and rampant parrots and you get WARS fought with DRAGONS.
I love Sirocco. Sirocco makes me so happy.
I’m sure he would be happy to return your regard.
I don’t see the cool old pics. Are they behind those ugly, poorly photographed bird-things?
They have old store tages on the bag. According to Uncle Wikipedia, “Tages was a founding prophet of Etruscan religion.” Furthermore, representations of him are rare, but “winged figures, representing divinity, are also common, especially on funerary urns from Tarquinia, but whether any depict Tages is questionable.”
I think we need to revaluate these objects in light of their obvious religious significance.
We could start our own old
storeschool religion!1. Buy ugly bird-thing pictures.
2. Peel Tages off back.
3. ???
4. Prophet!
So many adores – is multiple adoring allowed under this new religion, O Holy Ghostie?
Of course! I’m sure Tages would endorse polyadory.
Wow! The Church of YSaC has its first break-away cult! Awesome.
Headed by the Bhagwan Shree Raj G.C.
But you can just call me Al.
“[O]ld store tage” is very unsettling, the Tage being a clan in NE India.
Sparki are racist, not a mental stretch of any length–but, adhering Apatani shopkeepers to junk store kitche does seem a little over the top.
Hmmm… There are old store tages on the backs of these. According to Urban Dictionary, those are breasts. These paintings are suddenly worth the $25.
Depends on the artistic rating of the tages. I don’t know that I’d fork out $25 for anything less than a B frame… artistically speaking.
The tages that are in smaller frames just aren’t as collectable.
And don’t get me started on any tage that has droopy canvas.
Tage you’re
titit!The Salivationary Army’s lesser-known twin.
Yes, right next door to GoudaWill.
I went to GoudaWill once, but their merchandise was too cheesy.
Not to mention the fact that all the clothes only came in bleu, the only entertainment available was Betamax tapes of “The Roquefort Files,” the only toys featured the Cookie Muenster, and the only books were the Havarti Boys mysteries. I hate to complain about a charity shop, but that one gave me the chevres.
Yeah, and I don’t care for the way their items smell, ya know? Anytime I buy something from there I can’t keep the cats off of it.
I was going to buy a spread there, but at those prices? I told the saleslady they must be crackers to expect people to dip into their savings like that.
well cheez whiz, you guys!
Actually, the Revaluationary War continues today. People who paid $300,000 or more for their houses now find they have to throw in their first born child and a couple stock options to get half that when they sell.
: (
I just noticed that this is Vol. 1062. In a mere 4 days (or 3.2 in Illinois) we’ll reach 1066! I don’t want to be Hastings about that date, and maybe it’s only special to me.
Post 1066 should be named “Norman”.
Damn it, I should have waited.
By the way, if you haven’t seen this, you really need to.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQ8A5gRe_Dw
Genius.
Catchy tune, as are all the rest. An updated history “Schoolhouse Rock”, if you will.
To my everlasting (at least 15 minutes) shame, I did not understand what was wrong with the add until I’d read the comments.
Truly my speling prows are formidable!
And this is why we heart ye, my pequeno burrito.
I heard your poop deck is intimidating too…
Especially after chili night.
You say you want a revaluation
Well you know
We all want to change the price
You tell me that it’s evaluation
Well you know
We all want to know the worth
But when you talk about misconstruing
Don’t you know you can count Sparky in
Don’t you know it’s gonna be all rite
all rite, all rite
Dayum. Hammy beat me to that comment.
*refuses to pet the puppy’s tummy*
Forsoothe, with Ye Olde Store Tages on the back! Perhaps from Walton Market?
Oops!
OT: Eastern seaboard just had an earthquake centered in VA, reportedly. Hope everyone is OK.
I felt it here in NC. Made the doors and windows shake.
They felt it here and on upstate and out to Ohio, according to FB people. That’s a fair range. I am hoping our DC-area people are OK.
The building where I work was evacuated, but we’re back now.
OK here near DC. Had a lot of stuff fall off the walls and off of shelves at home, but nobody hurt. Hope everybody else is ok too.
Curiously coincident, there was a 5.3 quake in southern Colorado, last night about midnight. Items off shelves, rattling, and the like from that one.
jg, whereabouts are you? I’m in Baltimore.
All’s fine here. I noticed bottles rattling on the shelves and assumed it was due to the construction right outside the building. Didn’t realize it was an earthquake until I checked FB 20+ minutes later.
Felt it here. Whole house shook. Nothing major, though.
Glad to hear that there don’t seem to be any casualties so far.
AR: I’m in Fairfax VA. I think I knew you were in Baltimore from your posts. I’m up there a lot, since I owe my life to JHU Hospital. Glad you are OK!
Dittos on the hope everyone is ok. A coworker has a husband that works for the federal government and was told the epicenter was Mineral, VA… a little northwest from Richmond.
Hope all are safe.
Monitoring police/fire scanners – multiple residential collapses in Louisa, VA. No mention on injuries as of yet.
Dang! California is just so last month! We don’t get torndoes or hurricanes, or tsunamis, and now our earthquakes are being out-sourced. Looks like wild fires are all we have. Although the Aussies did it better, with cute koala drinking water photos.
Kidding aside, hope everyone made it through in safety.
I’d be happy to FedEx Hurricane Irene to you.
You’ll want the large flat-rate box, now that Irene is 600-something Km across.
I was hoping tropical storm Don would be bigger, my father-in-law is named that. Would be a great opportunity to say “Dammit Don!!! Are you causing more trouble?! Won’t you please stop? DAMN!” for a few weeks.
Seriously, fingers crossed for anyone shakin’ and swayin’.
Sending good thoughts to everyone affected – earthquakes are the suckiest. Can Mother Nature just chill the frak out already? 2012’s supposed to be the freaky year – she’s early!
Evidently the quake occurred on a little known fault line outside of DC called “Bush’s Fault”.
Oh, what a difference one letter can make…
Bianchi, no hiding in the box after hours! Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Eastern States, wherever you are!
Hey thanks! Twice in a week. What am I, Taco?
Sorry I missed it yesterday. The view from the beach house window of the Pacific has been taking all of my time. Oh and the cell service sucks too…