YSaC, Vol. 1040: The fish of the day is trout à la crème. Enjoy your meal.
2011 July 22
Time for some Friday morning cat fish math:
Bettas & betta bowls
Male betta 1st pic
With a pirtty vase for a rehomeing fee of 10.00Female betta 2nd pic
With cool looking bowl for a rehomeing fee of 8.00Or for both.bettas and both betta bowls for a rehomeing fee of 25.00
Even comes with a net and gravel
xxx.xxx.xxxx
Or email
One fish, two fish, Male fish, female fish,
Betta fish, bowl fish, math fish, fail fish.
This one has a pirtty vase,
This one has a pirtty face.
Say! What a lot of fish there are.
Yes! Some are $10 and some are $8.
Some of them are only bait.
For both the fish it’s $25
They may even still be alive.
Thanks, April!
*sits catulator down on table in front of betta bowls and goes to retrieve coffee*
Okay, now….what the…?
Sigh….my catulator says “Urrrrrrrppppp”
*contemplates selling of betta supplies on craigslist*
Let me get my fishulator and run some quick numbers for you. At least Sparky can spell “betta”; that’s the first word most people get wrong when writing about aquariums.
Just keeps git’n betta and betta, don’t it?
I can’t see the “pirtty” vase, is it behind that thrift store reject with the dirt in the bottom?
Given that it’s spelled “pirtty,” which I take to be pronounced with a southern drawl typically interpreted as “purdy,” I’m going to hazard a guess and say that the thrift store reject with the dirt in the bottom is something similar to the one the fish is actually in — which will turn out to be a striated glass tumbler with dried Beef-a-Roni in the bottom.
[phonek corey]
I’ve heard the pronunciation “pritty” in the rural Indiana-Illinois area of the midwest. Sometimes with a slight expiration before the dentalization, i.e., “préh’t’EE.” But also with a hard elidation, too, viz, “prit’ E.”
Here in Texas the “d” pronunciation is rendered more dentally into a “t.” In east Texas, as “pur TEE”; towards south Texas as either “puhrr TEah” or “puhrr TAYh”; out west, as the laconic truncated “puhr’T’ ” occasionally with a rolled “r” as “puhr’ r’T’ ” (without regard to the speaker’s oral use or non-use of tobacco).
[/yahl carr’t ohn nawh, y’har? corey]
I’ve only heard it in the movie Deliverance.
😉
I wonder where that fish has gone.
You did love it so. You looked after it like a son.
And it went wherever I did go.
Is it in the cupboard?
Yes! No!
Wouldn’t you like to know. It was a lovely little fish.
And it went wherever I did go.
It’s behind the sofa!
Where can the fish be?
Have you thought of the drawers in the bureau?
It is a most elusive fish.
And it went wherever I did go!
Oh fishy, fishy, fishy, fish.
Fish, fish, fish, fishy oh!
Oh fishy, fishy, fishy fish.
That went wherever I did go.
[fish rant] I get angry every time I see betta bowls like these. While bettas do have a labyrinth organ that allows them to absorb oxygen from the air, allowing them to survive in dirty or poorly oxygenated water for short periods, it’s very stressful for the fish, as is the lack of space for swimming. It’s cruel, pointless, and shortens the life of a beautiful animal.[/fish rant]
From memory, Betta fish do best in a similar environment to Koi; due to the similarity of natural environement they share.
That is to say warm, balanced water with plenty of plant life and indirect light.
Yeah, actually with any fish I’ve never understood why people would have such tiny bowls. Every time I see a tiny fish bowl I always think whoever owns it bought it specifically as just an accent to whatever it’s sitting on. I don’t own any fish (no real room to do so, and we have cats for whom any surface that doesn’t have their paw prints on it is a surface that has no business being there) but if I did I couldn’t bring myself to get anything so small that the fish would wish they had a tin cup they could rattle. I’d feel compelled to get a large enough tank that I’d be legally obligated to issue a flood warning if it ever broke, just so the fish would have plenty of leg (er, fin) room so they wouldn’t feel like they were trapped in a puddle.
General rule of thumb is one gallon of water per inch of fish, most aquarists try for double that if feasible. I’ve got a little five gallon planted tank (just plants, no fish) that Fearless seems to think I set up simply so she would have an interesting place to nap.
When frosting a cake I use a similar rule:
One inch of fish per pound of cake.
Sounds a little like the cake recipe from Portal.
I don’t know… seems a little fishy to me.
I agree with your original rant on these fish. I despise every time I run through a store and they have a shelf full of them in even smaller containers than the ones shown in the Sparky ad. Alas, until recently I have never been able to keep them as they do *not* get along with other labyrinthine fish (i.e. Gouramis) and also see a challenge in the elongated fins of the beautiful Angel. Now I cannot because I am a home breeder and, well, carnivorous little beasties like these will quickly have many, many meals of sushi.
On the other hand, while I know the 1 inch rule, I don’t agree with it as a fast application for all circumstances. In my 40 plus years of fish keeping I have discovered that you can work around that by two very efficient means: Excessive filtration (I run three filters on my 55 now) and by having a set of fish that are appropriate to different levels, i.e., my catfish and plecos deal with the bottom, my danios are top swimmers and my swords and neons inhabit the middle of the tank.
Okay, end of fish keeper rant.
*mad wanders off in continual search for the elusive zebra pleco*
[more rant] These same people who have these small bowls and keep fish there will be the first to complain if they see a dog chained up so it can’t turn around or a cat in a small cage that’s full of its own droppings. They don’t see that they are keeping the fish in exactly the same conditions. [/rant for now]
We have a huge tank for all my little fishes. It’s like sticking one kid into a playground and telling them the entire thing is just for them. There’s much too much room for all of them. I don’t understand why beta’s seem to always have such small quarters. Not that I would ever get one as I don’t want my other fish to die, but if I did, I’m sure my beta would be shocked by all the space I’d give him.
The only fish – also, coincidentally, bettas – that I have seen in worse conditions than this but still alive are some that one of my neighborhood dollar stores was selling. The little carrying tanks were an OK size considering their designed purpose, but there was maybe an inch and a half of water in them in which the fish could swim, which they did, but rather listlessly (I don’t know if fish could be depressed, but if they can, I bet these were). I debated buying them all to give them a bigger tank (except you can’t put them all in together) and theoretically more freedom, although that would have probably just encouraged them to sell more. Also, my catulator would have done his best to subtract as many of them as possible, which hardly seems a humane change of environment.
/kindness to animals rant
My personal favorite is the vase with the plant roots growing down into it, leaving even less space for moving around.
I hate those things. They say it’s supposed to be self-supporting, that the fish fertilizes the plant (usually a peace lily) and in turn the fish eats the roots to keep it from getting overgrown, but bettas are carnivorous. I’m sure if they were starving they would nibble on the roots, but they usually end up starving to death.
I didn’t realize that! I have been considering betta because I’ve heard they’re fine in small confined spaces and we don’t have room for big aquariums. I’m so glad I never got around to getting them, though I hope I would have found more about them before getting them if I had.
Funny thing is, the person who had told me bettas do fine in confined spaces is someone who worked in numerous pet stores, and she was a manager at one point. X| She gave our mutual friend a betta for her birthday in a tiny aquarium. To my knowledge, it’s still stuck in the same prison. I should tell her next time I see her.
To Sparkie’s credit, he wasn’t trying to sell us Beta Bowels.
If Sparky’s bowels are still in beta, he has more problems than selling a couple of fish.
The real problem with using Beta release bowels is that they tend to crash a lot.
If they’re crashing that much they must be just loaded with bugs.
They’re features, not bugs.
A feature is just a bug with seniority.
No, it’s a “feature” only if it is documented.
Bugs are just undocumented program features.
I thought features had to do with topographic maps.
drmk, your poetry is sure pritty. You should, you know, write a book or somethin’.
I spell pritty
Oh so shitty
I spelled pritty so shitty you say?
And I pity
Any idiot who buys from me today
My math’s smarmy
Oh so smarmy
It’s alarmy how smarmy I add
And so shitty
That I hardly can believe I can breathe
See the pritty fish I’m rehomeing there?
You can take the attractive gravel K?
Such a pritty fish
Such a pritty vase
Such a pritty net
Such a shitty Sparky!
I feel stunned
And entranced
Feel like running
And hiding my face
For I can’t live
With my pritty wunderfule fish
Am I the only one hearing that as a duet with Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler?
Am I?
Okay then.
Ah yes. From “Fish Side Story”. Love it.
OT: Hooray to Monica H. and her willingness to replace AdSense, which senselessly decided we had porn on our site (but they were the ones supplying the Cougar Life ads … WTH?). Thank you for stepping up for drmk and dan; BBU all of you.
I had to move my webpage and blog to another server because the server/provider they were on started also hosting porn sites. What happens is the IP address range of the server gets associated with porn and the who IP range gets blocked as a porn provider.
Taco, your stay in the box today is brought to you by the letters T, R, and Y.
I’ve been seeing a lot of baux time recently. I must have finally hit the correct drip setting for my coffee IV.
You are truly the beta of the box. Just don’t attack your own reflection.
Can I tap on the side of the box? I like to see him ‘flare up’. 🙂
COFFEE IV: A New Brew
It is a period of caffeine deficiency. Auto Drip, pouring out from it’s hidden percolator, has filled it’s very first cup before the Espresso has even finished pressurizing. During the first taste, it’s discovered that there is no more HALF N’ HALF in the fridge, and that secret plans being hatched by the French Press have aims of preventing it from being restocked. Pursued by a pack of French Roasted Coffee Beans, Princess Mocha races to the store on her one cylinder Vespa, the only hope to bring Cream to the Dark Side of the Coffee…
You don’t know the power of the dark roast.
May the frappe be with you.
I find your lack of froth disturbing.
I want that crema, not excuses!
Do not say “frosh” this close to August, you will give our fellows in Academe a twitch.
Latte, I am your father.
Just like making espresso shots for whomp rats in my T16 back home.
I heart ALL of you….
Hey fellers: I’m trying to catch up on my Facebook YSaCL stuff. I promise I’m not ignoring anyone. I don’t get on FB much since I can’t access it at work (I’m home on Hubby Monkey’s puter right now) and my laptop can’t access the intertubes since we had a storm in April that fried our broadband thing-y. I shall put my little monkey foot down and demand he fix the broadband problem. Unless he wants to set off a poo-flinging fit.
And I gotta go take Mini Monkey to her swimming party now. There ain’t no rest for the wicked Monkeys.
Kudos to our Llamanun for the Red Dwarf reference, by the way.
“FISH!”
This makes perfect sense. It’s one thing to give up one fish – it’s enough stress. But two? Let me just say that raising the price to $25 accounts for the emotional stress of losing both fish.
This is just someone having trouble letting go.
A quick search on Petsmart’s site shows me that I can get a plain betta for $3-4. Their expensive betta is currently on sale for $6. So even if Sparky could add 8 and 10 properly, the rehoming fee would still be too much. The post should say instead “a nice vase and small fish tank for sale, bettas included for free.” But then again this whole site is dedicated to “the post should say instead”.
I’m pretty sure you’re not even supposed to sell animals on CL… We were getting rid of our two betta fish (which, not knowing it was bad, we kept in 1/2 gallon glass cubes. But MrEB raised brine shrimp for them to eat, so that makes up for it… Right?) because we realized we weren’t cleaning the tanks enough to be good fish owners, and we said we were selling the fish tanks, with bettas included for free. When we didn’t get a response, MrEB edited the ad to say that he would flush the fish that evening if we didn’t get a taker…. Which, we wouldn’t actually do, but we got rid of them that afternoon! </I-possible-suck-at-fish-owning-and-Craigslist>
You’re not suppose to sell pets, but since Sparky was asking for a “rehomeing fee” rather than an outright price it was probably in enough of a gray area to slip by.
I may be more sourdough than wonder bread, but I’ll wager I do not have the cultural background to re-homie anything.
“Even comes with a net and gravel
xxx.xxx.xxxx
Or email”
Hum. I don’t think I want a fish that comes with email. It will be tying up the computer all the time. And getting the keyboard slimey. Ew.
E-mail is the least of the problem. They’ll completely take over your computer spending all their time on Fishbook.
Not to mention all the prawn they’ll download while you aren’t looking.
And spending entirely too much time sending flirty text bubbles on plentyoffish.com.
Fish just can’t resist the lure of the (inter)net.
Comes with a net and gravel? Great! I need a gravel in my new job as a judge.
Do you bang your little gravel? What, too soon to ask?
New theory:
Male fish = $10
Female fish = $8
He is less willing to part with the male fish because he’s sexist and values his departure more. Since it’s $25 for both, the investor must look at the possibility that they will make little fish babies, therefore legitimizing the purchase and then some.
In my experience, females cost more than males. Unless you go downtown to State Street and see Fredrico, he sometimes gives out coupons to his customers …
Wait, what were we talking about again?
At least you get coupons. All
wepeople get around here is a shirt that says “Jimmy hooked me up and all I got was this lousy T-shirt. And gonorrhea.”America’s Hat is truly a primitive place.
Do you at least get double Green Stamps on Tuesdays?
I thought Salmonella was the putrid ick of the hour.
*sigh*
This is so wrong. On so many levels. So many pirtty, pirtty levels.
Then wrong me this, Ms. Mudsie:
Fish Bowl
He feels confined
By glass
That separates
Our lives from his,
But alas
If he crossed it
He would
Die.
Inez S. deDeugd-McComas
You fixed it all. You are a super hero today.
🙂
So to share my earworm today:
The algae is always greener,
In somebody else’s bowl.
You dream ’bout nice rehoming
But that is the biggest joke.
Just look at the world around you
Right here on the fur-lined floor
Such wonderful things abound here
What more is you looking for?
*snap snap snap* Cool, daddy-o. Let me lay down a bongo beat in the background. 8)
In the small bowl
In the small bowl
Eating small wafas
In here it’s safa
from the beaks of fowls
Taco taco Magic magic, Punchity punch punch!
G’Night, Anna!
[delurking]
I’ve never heard of a re-homing fee except for Craigslist. If I were to assume Sparky read their policy on not selling pets but allowing for a re-homing fee, do you think he would have read the word “re-homing” and thus knew how to spell it?
Of course, that sounds like a pirtty big assumption of me.
[/delurking]