YSaC, Vol. M: Retro style!
Hi, I’m Troy McClure. You may know me from such snarky blogs as You Suck at Ping-Pong, Cookie Fail, and Pork Overload. I’m here today to host a retrospective of some of the finest moments that never happened in YSaC history.
Who can forget the time when the Llama-nun traveled to Nunavut for the YSaC convention? Ah, good times. The sheep are still hiding.
And the short-lived Ostrimu spinoff blog, Dan Does Dubuque! That one was declared illegal in thirteen states, including Iowa. That, not to mention the multiple restraining orders, resulted in it being canceled after only one episode, setting a new standard for failure. (Even Clerks: The Animated Series aired two episodes!)
Yes, all these moments that never happened can be yours on the new VHS tape, “The Worst of the Best of You Suck at Craigslist.”
[drmk]: Thanks, Troy. If you want to relive the precious memories of the YSaC moments that DID actually happen, you can click on the 8 Suckiest Craigslist Ads link or the Vote For Your Favorite link or the Learn Craigslist Through Song link.
And since it was really the Not.A.Lion posts that started this whole damned thing, here’s an unexpected twist on the theme:
Kids Tiger Table – $50
sellin kids tiger tabl 50 or best in your pocket. clean, no kid stains. not kidding very clean
Seriously? It’s.A.Lion.
Anyway, this appears to be our 1,000th post, which means we’ve been writing this blog since …. well, since the Crustacean Era, as far as I can tell. I’m sort of amazed, really; this started as a stupid thing I did to amuse friends and family, and now it’s a stupid thing I do to amuse a whole bunch of people who I consider friends and family even though I probably will never meet most of you.
Thanks to everyone who has submitted a Craigslist ad. We have a backlog in our “yes” pile, so if your submission hasn’t appeared yet, don’t despair! A super-special thank you goes to our regular readers and commenters — they’re the best part of the blog, as far as I’m concerned. And a super-SUPER-special thank you goes to Windrose, who has been helping out behind the scenes by managing the selection of the comment of the day for the Don’t Suck box for longer than I can remember, and fixing our stupid mistakes like setting posts to come up at 7 pm rather than 7 am.
I’ll refrain from getting all sentimental here. All I ask is that if you read the blog, I’d love it if you’d comment below — even (and especially!) if you’re not a regular commenter.
Thanks!
-drmk and Dan … with ad submitted by Stryde.
Oh my gosh, I’m so excited! 1,000th post, and I don’t know what to say.
Um… Congratulations, drmk and dan, and thanks for sticking it out this long!!
I got you a present *checks pocket* a tic-tac and a grocery receipt. *checks other pocket* thirty cents.
Here, don’t spend it all in one place. 🙂
1000?
That’s like elebenty brazillion in dog years.
It’s like elebenty godzillion in fly years.
But ironically only one in Godzilla years…
I don’t think I’ve ever wished anyone a happy 1000th anniversary before. I wasn’t sure what the appropriate gift was, so I brought 1000 bees.
Where’s the truck?
It’ll be here later, it had to go jump-start the winter bagel.
I was going to bring the boat, but someone turned it into a sandbox.
Is that the sandbox next to the rusting Viking stove and the swingset/deer carcass hanger?Looks nice!
It’s to the left of the swingfortslide.
Ah, next to the Paleozoic raven, then.
And the Piezoelectric Sparrow.
: puts on hipster beret:
I liked the Piezoelectric Sparrow better back when they were the Vacuum Tube Goshawk, before they went all mainstream.
Vacuum Tube Goshawk
So that’s what that haunted bird was!
I’ve been reading since February or March of 2009, around the time of the granny nylon stockings post; not.a.lions, ahrmwahres, and frensh perventional, oh my. At the time I had no idea I would still be reading, not to mention actively participating, at this point. The people who have become my friends along the way were completely unanticipated, but most appreciated.
Happy M post anniversary, drmk and dan, BBUY. *passes really, really, really big flask*
I don’t remember when I started reading, but it was sometime before the Datsun puppy.
Was that before or after the Chiwuahuah and/or the Hypno-Dogs?
I don’t remember when I started commenting; I can’t remember that far back without regression therapy.
I am glad I found a group of like-minded snarkers; it’s nice to have Facebook friends who aren’t always buggering me for sheep and stuff.
Hmmm… That doesn’t look right.
:checks spelling: “No writing errors found.”
:shrugs: Meh.
:submit comment:
You pay them in sheep? Think of all the money
Ipeople could have saved.But
youthey are much more likely to be fleeced.I’ve been reading since a few months after Lola, actually, but I didn’t comment for a long time. I’m so glad I started commenting and I love my YSaC friends…even when I’m mostly MIA like I’ve been lately.
Love you too, Bridgete! And Severus, too.
Oh, oh! I remember when I started reading, too! It was sometime after the one where it was all like SSFS (no) and there was a picture of a weird aquarium/lamp-stand/blender/whatever and then the text said no no again. Tee hee!
Been reading since sometime within the first 30 posts. Followed them over from Passive Aggressive Notes (which really went downhill, comment wise, since that time long ago). Don’t comment much, work requirements, blah, blah, blah, but never miss weekend catching up.
Happy M folks and may the Sparkies continue to be with you for many more.
Hello, my name is Funky Monkey. You may remember me from such posts as “Flinging Poo” and “Is That a Rash?” I’m at home posting from Hubby Monkey’s puter rather than mine at work, so I know that my gorgeous simian face will be replaced by an anonymous quilt swatch. But know that my sweet orangutan features are beaming, and I am tearing up, just a tad.
Dare I say it? Will I be crucified? Will I be banned from the better banana bars? I’ll say it…I ENJOY CHATTING ON YSaCL MORE THAN ON FACEBOOK!!!!
Keep the faith, llama-nun and ostrimu!
EDIT: Wait, there’s my pretty face! Squee!
Ah, dear FM,
WordPress uses the email address you give to sort out identity.
Which you may do by way of either just above the comment, or, by logging in through the forums[sic] (this latter will show a black bar across the top of the page, with your log-in name and some WordPress options).
Thus, a person can keep track of several identities, if they are of (or out of) a mind to.
That is my theory, it is no one else’s, it is mine; this theory I have[coffcoff].
Ooh, that was a fascinating trip through the Looking Glass.
Almost thought I’d lost Adores again
(for those that are new the Adore count seems to work through a cookie, which may be why they act differently in the mobile version–sometimes).
Look! A brontosaurus? *points->*
The bar thing is optional, you can go to your profile and click the little box if you don’t want it there.
I love you Ann Elk [Miss]. I entirely subscribe to your theory on the brontosaurus. You could say your work changed my life.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAYDiPizDIs
A third theory on south American ungulates . . .
But the not.a.tiger table isn’t even red! My whole worldview is crashing around me.
Congrats on reaching 1,000.
That’s why you can’t take it for free, silly.
Well it’s nearly free if Dave only has pocket lint in his pocket. Or the ferrets pocket.
The lack of white squiggles spoils it for me; here I was expecting the hipster-crushing inhumanity of The Man upon The Hip, and then I’m expected to engage in base, [gasp] capitalist, commerce to attain this treasure?
I swoon, the vapours o’ercome and shall have to retire to a cool parlour in search of a mint julep or some such.
All the worse for having had a one-day cool front yesterday–heat index is in the high nineties this afternoon, in humidity that’s dang-near palpable.
The humidity is so high here that water is falling out of the sky. Or the angels are peeing on us again.
Our agricultural and fire-fighting people would bow down to craven Angles, would that they’d micturate about 1/2″ per day, for, oh, the next 8 to 10 straight days.
Up to the Caprock, they need about 3/4″ every third day for the next thirty days. It’s so dry up there, that they are afraid of thunderstorms. First off, the lightning will light the dry scrub by just looking at it; then the clouds obscure the smoke. Then, a thunderstorm bringing 3-4″ of rain sounds good if it’s a 15-16″ drought, right? Nope. The dust turns to mud, and it drains off to every place it is needed least, and at very high velocity, taking stock, vehicles, property with it.
Tough times.
Ok, made me look, it’s cooled off, as of 1845 heat index is the ambient 93º, being helped by RH being down to a scant 36%, DP of 62º–biggest factor will be the wind, SSE 22 gusting 28. Hope it’s this nice tomorrow evening when the Trishas play our local outdoor amphitheater.
The sky is peeing on us too. I need some sunshine out of it’s bum.
By all means, send some of that angle pee out west. They apparently like us too much to pee on us, but all us lowely mortals would really like to tick them off.
And congrats to LimeLolly for being first! Apparantly 15 minutes WILL give you a 15% chance of being first on the post!
I’m small but quick. 8)
(and been awake since 3:30 AM)
You just described one of my ex-boyfriends. I really like the corner today.
small but quick
Hmmmmm, I’ve often been referred to as “old but slow”, or maybe it was “old butt, slow”. Meh, nevermind….
GRAMPDADDY!!!! Hurrah!
You know you’ve been missed… but only because the newbies don’t believe you have a red nightie.
I also have a donkey who rides on my bike…..
so I can peddle my ass around town.
Grampdaddy!!!!
We’ve sooo missed you pedalling yourself around in the red nightie, with your stories about how it was dating when you were young, had to mix your DNA with sticks …
Edit: LL beat me to the nightie. Oh well. At least she didn’t use the MAJOR AWARD to do it.
I feel like Big Bird after the rest of Sesame Street sees
SnufealSnuffleeeeufSnuffy for the first time. I told you Grampdaddy was real.Now that school’s out for the summer, I hope to be around on a more regular basis, and the coffee slices will keep me more regular on a round basis.
Kelli, set a place for me in the corner – I figure that will be where I spend most of my time.
Yay! It’s one of the old cogs in the wheel back in gear. Did you bring your stick to shake?
Knowing the state of your colon, however, is not necessary.
I am so happy to see you again Grampdaddy. I finished my Master’s! For some reason I really needed to tell you that 😀
Yay Lara! Congratulations on the Masters. For some reason I really needed to tell you that. 🙂
And Hammy, my colon is fine – just one dot above the other. My semi-colon, however, seems to be dragging along the bottom.
Grampdaddy! Come on down and sit a spell!
Congratulations on the 1,000th post! Thank you for being here, AND being funny and irreverent. Also, thank you for not going the “Cheezburger” route.
Just a short walk to 2,000! I think I’ll tag along.
Seconded re: Cheezburger comment.
Thirded re: Cheezburger comment
Quadrupled re: Chezburger comment.
And thanks for all of the snark and laughs.
“Cheezburger” (n+1)thed.
Yeah, I shudder to think what would have happened had the Illustrious duo accepted the bid from the Cheezeburger site.
Good thing they have priciples… the corner notwithstanding.
Is it contagious?
*twitch twitch*
Nope, not at all*
*Twitch*
They got offered something from the cheezeburger people? I didn’t realize that, I just thought we were talking about coherency. Thank you drmk and Dan, that must have been a hell of a decision to make!
Speaking of people “having” things, I offer two examples overheard among friends:
1. Reminding responding firemen to glove up because “this poor woman has hospice.”
2. Sympathizing about a family struggling with a challenging child, “he has ADT.”
It could be worse. It could be DDT.
I think he was going for “pecil-ples”.
“he has ADT.”
Wow, that’s alarming!
(Wow, that was really bad. I won’t do it again, I promise. I do have an excuse, though: Last day of school, and had about 75 out of 100 first graders sobbing because “I’m never gonna have my teacher ever again!!!”)
Why were they crying, Grampdaddy? What did you do to their teacher that was so bad it ended the school year?
I did NOTHING to the teacher! NOTHING! You’ll never be able to prove it and it was all just hypothetical and who knew her head would just pop off like…
Look, just never mind, OK? I’m gonna go back and shred some more papers now and we’ll all just act like nothing ever happened.
*groan*
We have a technical school here referred to as UTI. I snort every time I see their commercial.
Kelli, do students have to do anything to pass there? Must be a real pain…
I do prefer to be able to read the comments on here so I concur.
I’d spent most of a month away from the cheez’ers–mostly due to computer problems–went back a few days ago to see that they’d revamped the pages again.
So, none of my “usual” places were there anymore. The ones that were there had been watered down, too.
Mind you, I’ve not actually read–deliberately–any of the comments sections in a great long time, too. Which makes me wonder just how much of their page traffic is just in “views”–sounds a tough market to sell ad copy within.
Makes me wonder how many lurkers are out there who just do not know how much of the content here is beyond the postings (I suspect a high number of the f/b page members, actually).
So, kudos and congratulations, and hearty welcome to all those brave enough to wander in among this bunch of Python-quoting, Doug Adams-reading, english-professing, geeks, nerds, and fans of everything from MSTK3000 to RHPS to TMBG to TNG and beyond–really, there’s only the least bit of spontaneous haiku here.
Ok, so coffee is by the slice; Jackson Pollack gets to draw the line of propriety (in both senses)–it’s all good. Honest. Really, the worst that happens if you do not fit in is that you either become a meme or are forgotten entire.
And, if you see surreal does*, it is upon your own conscience whether you bedazzle their hooves or not.
_______________________
*Y’know, the cream cheese ones with pretzel-stick legs and the one antler of broccoli–well, no, I did not ask which kind of mushrooms were in that pepperoni-n-shroom crepe last night, why do you ask . . .
You have a point (I think); it took me several posts to realize that there was a comment section under the original posts, and that it was often better than the ad.
The only reason I looked was because of the baux.
“Best in your pocket”?
Wow! Gonna need an NC-17 rating in here pretty quick!
“No kid stains”?
So that’s where John Wayne Gacey’s furniture ended up.
We’ve made it to a grand! Woohoo! Okay, so I’ve only been here since around the 700s, but we’ve spent weekends going back in time this year so those of us who haven’t been here as long can appear as though we’ve been here forever! And of course, none of us would be here at all if it weren’t for Ostrimu and Llamanun (BBUT) giving us a smart and witty place to snark our butts off. Schadenfreude ist die beste freude!
So who wants to plan the party for 2000?
Not me, I tend to be just a little bit slow. We’d end up partying like it’s 1999.
I went to a social gathering and we ended up partying like it was 1829. Boy that was… fun?
I always party like it’s 2999. Since I will be dead by then, my parties pretty much just consist of me decomposing.
So you are Beethoven?
I just read that as panties instead of parties Kelli
I never decompose in my panties….wait, what?
Then you aren’t a Victoria’s Secret zomb
Speaking of Victoria’s Secret models (their semi-annual sale begins today), I am looking online for stuff and what I notice is that all of the VS models look angry – not just pouty or expressionless but SNARLY – like they are going to jump out of the monitor and beat the crap outta me.
Maybe they just want a sammich. I know I get cranky when I am hungry.
Well, let’s face it, those nutrient wafers they have to eat in order to stay skinny enough to snake drains aren’t very filling. They’re probably in such a state of constant hunger that their stomachs sound like a ’57 Chevy in perpetual idle.
ToB, I am so stealing that for my Facebook Status!
Ok, I’m not sure even my college town is hip enough for a clearly-ahead-of-the-curve band like “Decomposing Panties.”
Not real sure about the audience they might draw, for that matter . . .
***giggle***
“Hi! I’m Trixi with an I, my favorite color is clear, and my favorite food is Donald Duck ice cubes.”
Read that in Sarah Palin’s voice.
Throw a wink in there too.
Victorian Secret – because undead ladies need some undeadwear.
I would be pissed if I had to cram into ridiculous under wire bras and thongs and then let people take pictures of me so I could become a fantasy for every boy out there who is having a sexy day.
Also, Brazilian doors for that Lola
Gosh, I don’t know what to say…except I am pretty sure that table isn’t free, or red, and Philip Glass didn’t write the ad.
Other than that, party on dudes and dudettes!
I presume kid stains are differentiated from adult stains by either the presence of cooties or the lack of other fluids that would show up with Luminol and a blacklight. (We’d have to run it through a GCMS to be sure.)
I do like that it’s pocket-sized; that makes it quite portable. Though it also means that the only things I can rest on it are doll-sized teacups or the morning rail of blow. Kind of a mixed bag, really.
Perhaps it is a full-sized table and it comes with a transdimensional pocket to keep it in. That would be a handy thing to have; no more looking for parking places, just drive into your pocket!
The geico gecko’s magic invisible pants. He keeps the table in the front right pocket and his wallet and cell phone in the front left pocket. He keeps the more interesting stuff in his back pockets.
(Yeah, I know, I brought up this pair of magic, invisible pants before. Still think it’s valid here).
Inivisble pants of holding!
I’m using that in my next D&D campaign.
I tried to tell the policeman about the invisible pants but he just wouldn’t listen.
Inivisible – only visible if you have an innie belly button.
You gotta fancy up those D&D item names, you know.
Sure, anyone can have boots of spider climb.
But only my group has Sticky Mucik Boots of Spiydiler climib!
Happy M-iversary! It’s time to party like it’s no longer post nine-hundred-ninety-nine!
:gets out blender and turns on Lounge disco ball:
Reading all this sentimentality makes me want to sing some Bette Midler.
Did you ever know that you’re my hero?
You’re everything I wish I could be.
I can be snarky like I want to
As long as I’m logged on to Y-S-A-C.
No? Okay, well congrats on 1000. That is HUGE in blog years!
*starts the conga line to the corner* I’m glad I was here before the first 1000 and I intend to be here through the next 1000.
Now what’s this about someone trying to sell a table in my pocket?
If you can fit a table in your pocket….I’ll just go to the corner.
Oh, that’s a table in your pocket? I thought you were just happy to see me.
Oh oh! 1000th post! Time for some of the best snark I can dig up!
*reaches into his hat-o-snark*
And the winner is:
“If I said I liked this tiger table, I’d be lion.”
…
I don’t get it.
That didn’t look like your hat you reached into there…
Is that a table in your pocket or are you just really happy to see us?
*jingle jingle jingle*
Now you do.
Lola in the TacoThong?
*TACOSPLODEY!*
Thongsplodey, too. Oops! I’m rather more curvy than you are.
Premature Tacosplodation? I think I have some emails in one of my folders that’s all about helping with that, TM.
So the thong is no more? Thank you Miss Lola! Now I can walk around in here without the welders helmet.
Wait hold on I think I’ve got… YUP!
*SNAP*
*JINGLY JINGLY JINGLY!*
My spare set still works!
Smedley, before you walk around the lounge helmetless, you may wish to help me check to see if anyone was hit with thong remnants and needs medical attention. The velocity was … not inconsiderable.
I’m over in the corner if you have questions.
Fluorescent fuchsia is a good look for you.
You might want to rethink the green Naugahyde chaps though.
AAUUGGGHHH! A SPARE! My corneas just vaporized. I can’t help anyone!
Now I have to feel my way to the corner on my hands and knees.
Gooey. And not in a good way.
Very few things found on the floor are gooey in a good way.
Meh… Taco’s shown the thong so much, it’s almost lost it’s shock value. Or maybe my eyes have just gotten really bad.
:squints: WTH?? Is that fox fur?
Words to live by.
Sometimes the fox gets the squirrel, sometimes the squirrel gets the fox.
It’s like the plumber’s mantra while under a house–
“it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices . . . ”
Ooh, Shiney!
“it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices, it’s just melted coffee slices . . . ”
Also as suggested a while ago…
MERKY BEESMAS EVERYONE! Now go decorate your red tables with vintage crisco and cereal and bedazzle some deer hooves!
Write it down for later. Merky Beesmas is on May 27th.
May the Llama-nun and Ostrimu reside ever in your snark.
Bees be upon us, everyone.
MERKY BEESMAS you ol’ Building and Loan!
Do I get Beesmas off as a religious holiday? If so, I’m grabbing my surfboard trainer and heading out to the shores of Lake Huron.
Here in the US we are about to embark on a 3-day holiday, so maybe I’ll call it Memorial Day/M YSaC posts day.
Surfboards and lakes. It’s just.not.right.
🙁
It’s only for practice. Everyone knows you only surf for real in very large wave pools filled with Jell-O.
Will the Kosher and vegetarians have a wave pool filled with pudding instead?
I can’t figure out what the vegans would have. Soy milk pool?
Poker chips and showgirls.
Oh! That kind of vegan.
[ot puzzlement]
I’ve only seen Lake Michgan from near chicagoland; and Erie only as part of a stop-over in the farthest corner of Ohio, so, does Lake Huron have any fetches where surf piles up?
Glacial geology is not much condusive to surf-making littorals, but, if memory serves, Huron is oriented in a way that the prevailing winds could pile repeatable surf on the lee shore.
Is that the (a) case? Or is “Surf Huron” a bit like “Ski Missouri” or “Surf Arizona”?
[\ot]
Ski Wisconsin is one of those too. Oh look, a 200ft hill! Let’s put a ski resort on it and call it the Wisconsin Alps!*
*True story, I drive by it every now and again.
You can ski in Arizona and it has actual lakes.
Yeah, but isn’t the only surf in AZ there in
PoenPhenPonburnt-up-reborn-bird city, there?One thousand, huh? This both delights me (for the plentiful amount of snark) and depresses me (as I am gradually losing all faith in humanity).
Here’s to the next thousand, then!
Wow. 1000. Congrats, Llamanun and Dan. BBUY. Thanks for the laughs, everyone. I can’t wait for the next 1000.
And the best in my pocket? Hrm……..A pair of rubber gloves, a small squirt bottle of eye drops, and a cell phone that doesn’t work anymore, which is used as a watch/phone book*. Can I have my not.a.tiger table now, please?
* This is absolutely, positively true.
I have … My work keys with the 1-Up mushroom keychain, a scrunchie, and some cat hair.
Cell phone, keys, pad of paper, pen, wallet, box cutter, and my radiation safety badge.
I’m boring. 🙁
+3 doors for the mushroom keychain.
It’s this little guy;
http://www.dealextreme.com/p/cute-mushroom-shaped-coin-purse-20637
I usually keep quarters in his noggin but I ran out 🙁
I’ve almost bought one of those a few times, but get distracted and order knives instead.
Lots of knives.
No, there is absolutely no reason to be worried about that.
One partially chewed Starburst candy, placed in the pocket by small child with the words, “Here, you can have this. I don’t like this flavor.”
(O/T) Anybody know how to get a partially chewed Starburst out of a pocket? Thanks in advance – I think.
I would think if you iced the starburst like you would gum it would become brittle and break off. You would have residue if the rest of it would be gone.
Let’s see…
**digs in pockets**
A cell phone, a beat-up wallet, a playing card…
what’s this?
Oh, it’s my brand new Varsity Letter. How’d that get in there?
Congrats on the Letter!
Hmm, and just where has our favorite Dalek gotten to, I wonder.
I currently have no pockets since I am still in my pajamas.
I echo the pajamas.
Now appearing at the 40Watt Pajama Echo! And their hit single Waking Up with You Around Me, Around Me, Around Me, Around me.
At home and enjoying an extended holiday so my pockets currently have umm….a 1980’s era Nike headband. Found it yesterday whilst cleaning. Now if i can find the matching wristbands I am golden!
Them being around you… Is that knife related?
CJ, if you do, please model them and share the pics. 🙂
Best in my pocket? Hmm, used chapstick, victorinox gentleman’s companion, or Force Protection Challenge Coin?
Doubt Spark’ has anything good to drink if I throw coin on the Not.A.Tiger table.
I’m not trading my “swiss army knife” with a Sparky.
And, dry as it is, I’m keeping the chapstick, thank you very muchly.
When I wake up, well, I know I’ve got the bees,
I’ve got the bees that were a-swarming in the truck.
When I get up, yeah I know I’m gonna read,
I’m gonna read the Craigslist ads that really suck.
But I would read 1000 ads
And I would read 1000 more
Just to be the one who walks a thousand miles
To throw at you a door!
This is like the best theme song. ever.*
*for YSaC the tv show.
Thanks much. I think it’s crying out for more verses!!!
The regulars are snarkin, and brewin’ strong,
Brewin’ the hard coffee for the corner we love,
And when the coffee’s out of the deep frier,
We’ll be so deep in the corner, dirty minds.
And I would comment 1000 times
And I would comment 1000 more
Just to get into the baux,
and get punched by Windy in the store.
We should totally get some of the regulars together and do a podcasted snark fest! Call it YSaC live or something.
I don’t know if I could deal with your typos if you spoke them.
Larasplode?
*DERP*
Derp derp squee!
Derp de-derp de-derp Squee Squee!
Ok, the concept of YSaCtv is boggling my brain a bit.
Mostly because I remember when CBC told Second City TV that they had to have three minutes of “canadian content” per episode. And, in that meeting, one of the staff said “What’s ‘canadian content’? A couple guys talkin’ ’bout back bacon ‘n’ beer?” And, thus was born the Bob & Doug Mackenzie Great White North segment.
The “map” of regulars is daunting by itself<g>–some Canadians, then the US NE-NYC area; then down to MD & the Carolinas, then west to IN, IL, and WI also south to LA, TX, then AZ; still further west to UT and the PNW and SoCal, and, we cannot forget out NZ and UK corespondents.
Although–
I just had an image of the blog automated into a video-composited ‘cast. It would be a virtual Lounge, into which avatars would appear as content was created. Which would be a tad surreal, too, since avatars would change, some would appear from the far future, and yet, it would all tie together.
Like a version of MST3K using SNL from three-four years ago, only with the bots “in” the cast . . .
Hmmmmmm *wanders off pondering tech and s/w and such while investigating what the cat knocked over . . . *
Guys?! I think I broke the Capn’!
Do we have a spare, still?
Why don’t you look in the thong drawer?
You may have broken him, but he’s given me an idea… YSaC MUD.
I imagine there would be much fun involved in level grinding. Possibly on poles. Maybe hungarians, too.
1. Why is a spare distillation rig germane?
2. “MUD” Hmm, the boy* may be on to something here <mad scientist gleam in eye>
_____________________________________
*Use is intended as purely descriptive and alliterative; no intention, imprecation, or inference of inferiority based on age meant, intended, nor implied.
Congrats on the 1000th posting! I’d say something snarky, but I’m working on giving up caffeine, and without that in the morning I’m lost.
Oh, by the way? Actually.A.Tiger.
Congrats on the first 1000! I wish I could send in some of those lovely sucky posts, but people in [location] don’t tend to post them. Pity that. Apparently, I need to change up my hunting grounds.
I’ve heard Wisconsin has good hunting grounds. Talk to Taco. He also may be able to loan you some knives.
Oh…or, were you talking coffee grounds? In that case, head to the snark lounge.
Kitty!
SQUEEE!!1!
:clears throat:
Sorry ’bout that.
Maybe you should move to Ish, I hear it’s Sparkies all the way down.
Well, Ish can’t be any worse than [location]. It’s just flat boring here. I mean, not.a.tigers and not.a.lions are called by their more common names here. I blame the zoo.
Lion, Lion, clean and bright
On the table in this light
What immortal dufus has
Confused you for your cousin Paz?
William Blake would be so proud right now if he wasn’t dead as a door nail.
He gets a lot of presson YSaC. I think we’ve redone his Tiger poem at least a half dozen times or more, not to mention some of his other works.
By now he’s spinning like a top in his grave.
Sounds entertaining if creepy. He’s been dead long enough that little bits of him are flying off.
I am a fan of all posts that make people go back to read the original poem
It’s been a while since we’ve had a liger post. I figured it was time to add more steam to Blake’s spin.
Ok, my alt.country station just played Ray Wylie’s new tune with the lyric “Muddy Waters is as deep as William Blake”–which is an eerie synchronicity.
I’d be all Twilight Zone/Outer Limits-out, but the song is now REK’s “Walking Cane” so I cannot be creeped out right now.
New from Hasbro!!
Lee Presson YSaC!
Now, instead of writing something witty on a blog, you can
scratch Sparky’s eyes out!
Leave no evidence!
Get away with it!
*smooths red carpet, checks sparkling fruit juices, adjusts name tag”
HI! I’m Windrose, and on this auspicious occasion of the Mth posting, I’d like to say how happy and honored I am to be here and to help when I can. Luckily I’m typing, because I get all choked up and weepy when I try to speak.
Seriously, my dear friends and family, you can’t know how much you help me on a daily basis. ((HUGS))
Ahem. Okay. Here’s the French Vanilla coffee slices, fresh out of the ovenpot!
We appreciate you too Windrose. You always swoop in when we screw up and sprinkle bird seed on the key board.
Birdseed on the Keyboard is the name of my They Might Be Giants cover band.
“Birdhouse in Your Soul” is one of the first TMBG songs I remember hearing (we had crappy radio where I grew up, so you kind of had to pray the stations in the nearby college town would occasionally come up with something that wasn’t either top 40 or classic rock).
Does BSotK consist of deux Jean?
or Jean Deauxes a deux?
Congratulations! And many, many (WAY more than 1,000) thanks! I laugh everyday while drinking my morning coffee because of this blog.
The trick is not to shoot the coffee out my nose—I don’t always win that battle….
Congrats and thanks, again!
If you do the projectile coffee thing enough times you get pretty good at aiming. Everything smells like espresso after a while, but it’s a small price to pay.
Actually, everything smelling like espresso would be more of a benefit to me than a hindrance.
Allow me to warn you, root beer is extremely uncomfortable when shot out of the nose.
Somehow I feel we should have a Roast to mark this momentous occasion.
I’m so happy to be here today. 🙂
I believe we have a dark roast for this occasion. Or is it Columbian?
How long do we cook a coffee roast anyway?
*Checks the book*
Bake at 375º for 1 hour per cup of beans, or until firm. Serve with a pitcher of steamed milk and garnish sugar packets.
But for how long do you roast the Colombian? Do we need a spit?
I can’t find any steamed milk. Can I substitute this picture of an angry cow?
Well, my roasted coffee was from Sumatra.
Whatever kind I am having, it won’t be the kopi luwak coffee.
I knew this crew would go the coffee route rather than the beef brisket route or the onslaught of insults in the name of comedy route.
Party on Garth!
Personally, I wanted to keep *The Situation from ruining the party.
*A complete waste of steroids that could be used for, I don’t know, making chickens bigger or something.
They should use those steroids to breed four-legged chickens! Then there would be enough drumsticks to go around.
And here, I envisioning a comedy roast… with a numbering system. Put someone on the dais and make them tell jokes.
Party on Wayne!
Wayne is the best place to hold a party.
I thought the best place to hold a party was on its pecil.
I think you mean a party in your mouth. Wait…what?
In Wayne’s Coating?
http://duluth.craigslist.org/mat/2362972442.html
I’ve been told, numerous time, not to make coffee, so I brought fresh blueberry and strawberry pie to the M Celebration party. They will be in the snark lounge.
No Taco, don’t throw that pie.
Party your pecil off, Mudsy!
I don’t have a pecil Lola.
I covet Hammy’s on a daily basis.
Mudsy has a pecil?
I have a confuzzle now.
EDIT: Is “covet” a euphemism? ‘Cause that’s how I’m choosing to read it.
ghostie: I doubt that our dear Lord of the Old Testament would go to such lengths as to set bushes on fire and make old men climb to the top of mountains just so H/Se could speak in euphemisms. Covet is only to be used in reference to the Ten Suggestions and the dialogue in the The Silence of the Lambs.
Silly people — it’s a kid’s table FOR tigers. If you keep tigers in your house, it’s a good idea to teach them table manners along with the kids.
1,000 posts at YSAC is part of why the Post Office is going broke. Remember the Dark Ages when comments were made with handwritten letters? What Would Ben Franklin Do?
I think you would be teaching them table manners while they feast on the kids.
I mostly lurk, occasionally comment, and have gotten one submitted SuckPost(tm) up on the site.
Just wanted to say that I love the site; keep up the good work. Er, the good postings and mocking of other people’s horrid work. Something like that.
Cheers! ::clink::
Re Box, Bwahahaha! You thought you were done with earworms from SoM. 8) Enjoy!
Wow! I am so proud to share the M bawks with all of you!
You like me! You really like me!
I don’t think I’ve seen a box stuffed so full before. I hope everyone is sufficiently lubricated.
Why is there a shovel in my corner?
O hai! I’m so happy to see my find make the honorary 1,000th post- thanks again! I’m… I’m in tears! ~SOB.~
But really, though. What if I don’t have any pockets? Do I get it for free? Or do I have to sacrifice my pants? D:
Pants are for losers anyway.
Down with pants!
Wait…
Up with shirts!
Off with ponchos!
Up with People!
Hey now…
*Itch Itch*
…you’re an all star
get your game on
go play…
And all that glitters is gold!
Except tigers…
or is it lions?
[all that glitters . . . ]
Was a time, now long ago, when I had free time for such things, and was in a far-from-here location. It was the cusp of the seasons in this part of the world, and I’d been circling an area in search of venison.
Mostly is was hiking a good long stretch, being outdoors and alert, just enjoying the feeling of letting the zanshin reach out as far as it would go.
So, coming around the hill, I could feel the caress of the wind on my cheek, the soft susurrus of the tall grass rippling like a pond. There was a treeline, with a dry or semi-dry creek down the bottom of the hill. There was a “something” about it that made me pause.
I crept over the hill, staying careful to never be taller than the grass. I eased through the grass as slowly as a I could, seeking out, by feel as much as by sight, for another spot to observe from.
This, too, was engaging, letting my breathing, heartrate, etc., all calm; to emulate the quiet, the motion, of the wind. It can be good to engage such skills.
Eventually, I worked to a knoll, a lumpy bump in the hill. Not much, just a small patch of broken rock and short grass surrounded by the tall grass. the view had brought the creek in close, no more than 40 or 50 yards. And, there was water, and game sign.
In fact, my binoculars espied a tag and harem of does in the treeline. They were moving towards the water with the slow inexorability of clouds to a horizon. I eased slowly around and brought up the rifle to focus on where I wanted the troupe to walk to; clear shot, good backstop, that sort of thing.
A cloud came by and left a darker bit of shadow than been that day. The wind went a hair contrary, no longer directly into my face. The cloud passed, and it seemed lighter, brighter than it had been.
And, there was a “something” that made me change focus, to “look” more strongly around me. Good that I did. For, in the grass, something did glitter, but, it was tawny, and lank–and just as focused upon the deer as I had been. Close, too–or perhaps the paleolithic prairie-ape reflexes kick perception higher; to see careful breathing from the difference between the wind blowing.
I did a slow, very, very careful retro grade back over the hill and returned to my ride enriched, impoverished, marveling, adrenalized and calm, all at once. Then drove home to a night’s rest.
Life goes on.
Aw Capn’… no venison for you.
Had plenty that year; gave away the rest of my tags to those more in need (ran out of weekends to go, too).
Mostly did not have to explain to TPW how I wound up wrestling an apex predator during a glut year of venison.
Or have to listen to the GW explain “We ain’t gots no puma in [region]–so what wuzzit, rally?” Except, I did have to listen to just that, after I reported the sighting to TPW, as state law requires. Apparently there were stripes or spots or great long-tufted ears that I imagined not seeing. Mind you, as stealthy stalkers go, that GW probably could not spot Junebugs standing under a 100W lamp at sunset, either.
Such is life. Some perceive it; others only notice its absence.
Congrats! I love this blog and I adore my fellow snarkers. I started reading because my best friend sent me here and soon after she submitted the snake couch ad. I was hooked after I read “Excuse me stewardess, I speak jive.” I went through the archives and read them all. I think I scared my neighbors by laughing hysterically. You guys rock. Congrats drmk (BBUH) and Dan!
I didn’t realize that the Sofasnakel ad was (if a bit indirectly) what brought you here! That’s great.
I’m an occasional submitter, and an almost-never commenter. Somehow, despite being witty all over the internet, all I can think to say here is usually “Ha! They’re dumb!” and my grandmother taught me that if I didn’t have anything nice to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all.
I’d like to congratulate you guys on 1,000 posts, and on coming up with a creative idea that I haven’t seen elsewhere. The internet is full of cat pictures, dumb people on facebook, and mistyped texts, but I haven’t yet seen anyone else taking on the hilarious monster that is craigslist.
I hope I get to keep submitting things for a long time to come.
Hey! I am an occasional commenter and almost never submitter. You must be my doppelganger. Nice to meet you!
*Checks avatar*
Yep. That’s exactly what I look like! 🙂
Greetings, doppleganger.
I rarely comment but I read this blog every day. It’s the highlight of my morning! Thank you so much for all the work you do, just to make us laugh (or weep, as the case may be).
#333 is still our favorite and gets us rolling with laughter, and my 6-year-old son can recite the video adaptation by heart.
I had to go back and reread and rewatch that. Thanks for the reminder!
I wonder what ever happened to that guy…
*squeeks rubber ducky*
I am very glad I found this blog, if not, I would never have seen the taco thong on a squirrel, never seen so many Not.A.Lions, never learned catmath and WildCatmath, never considered the possibilities of a life-size cardboard cutout army, never wondered what it would be like to eat cheese off of Lionel Richie, never would have been portrayed by Felicia Day and so much more, too many to list. Congrats dan and drmk, bees be upon you.
I need to do some drawing practice so I can bring that mental image to life.
Not to mention the massive links! Oh…the HUGE manatee!!!
I’m not sure we should mention the Taco Thong and his massive links at the same time.
ooppps
If anyone needs me I’ll be over here, buldging.
*JINGLY JINGLY JINGLY*
Taco, you seem to have an extra d.
And at no extra cost!
Taco’s D cup appears to runneth over.
Maybe he should move up to a double D cup.
Great, you’ve set off my peril-sensitive sunglasses. Now I’ll have to feel my way around.
*feelfeelfeelfeel*
Ooh, who brought the blancmange?
BLANCMANGE NOT ON FIRE!
Thank goodness it didn’t set off Mindfield’s pecil-sensitive sunglasses!!
I have a glasses-sensitive pecil. It goes off whenever someone is trying to inspect it closely.
And you think you hate TSA checkpoints.
The blancmange means to win Wimbledon!
“Hey, what’s this?”
:boing!:
“AHHHH! MY EYE!”
*Psst* MF, that’s NOT blancmange.
Ok, I just had a Gerry Anderson vision of YSaC TV with cardboard-cutout puppets . . .
Here is a comment as I don’t normally comment and wanted to say, “Hi, I love this site.”
Hey, we got one! Look, guys, we got one!
Hi! Nice to meet you! We’d love it if you could
bestay for dinner!Please feel welcome to comment again. We seem to have no problems with behaving not-normally here.
Not-normalacy is highly underrated.
I’m so proud of the llama-nun and ostrimu (Bees Be Upon Them) on attaining 1000 posts. And I’m so glad for all the regulars and occasional-ers that help to brighten my day.
(((((GROUP HUG)))))
(No, I said GROUP)
(Watch out for the lice)
I already said off with the ponchos! I think the lice go with it don’t they?
This celebratory song is brought to you by the roman numeral M.
Piss-stained mattresses
Sold by a nutcase
Buy me a wok of disco
Or Lionel Richie’s face
Let’s do a double-take snarking at the mistakes
Long run, Llamanun, bees by the short ton
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
(Youbie doobie you suck)
I want a nacho fountain
(Suck suck, you suck)
I’ll use it every now and then
(Youbie doobie you suck)
While I watch wrestlin’
(Suck suck, you suck)
On ESPN
Tuscon, Nashville, Indianapolis
Sparky, you suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
Singing candle opera
Get my rocket shoes shined
By a hispanic midget
It’s okay, he doesn’t mind
I wanna buy a barbecue to ride down the avenue
French prudential covered with steel wool
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
(Youbie doobie you suck)
Haunted painting
(Suck suck, you suck)
T-shirt staining
(Youbie doobie you suck)
Punctuating
(Suck suck, you suck)
You know what I mean
Post it!
I don’t know what I’m saying…
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
All around the world
Wherever they are
Crap off the street, clean it all up
They’ll put it in your car in the middle of the night
Haha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Haha ha ha ha ha ha
Haha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Haha ha ha ha ha ha
Music on a camera
Bleizing down the freeway
Got a message for the Vatican
It’ll save us from doomsday
I want a bust of Jesus, wrap it up for Beesmas
Put it on the punk bed next to the log sled
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
(Youbie doobie you suck)
They’re all around you
(Suck suck, you suck)
The madness surrounds you
(Youbie doobie you suck)
They’re all around you
(Suck suck, you suck)
Post it!
Tuscon, Nashville, Indianapolis
Sparky, you suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
You suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
Suck, suck at Craigslist
I LOVE the Roman numeral M. It’s X times better than the Roman numeral C!
Mille centum et decem vincit semper.
(M always beats C and X)
semper derp
Sed aequales decies centum milia semper.
(in gratuitous example, 10 x 100 = 1000; QED)
Damn straighr Mudsy *derp*
Congrats guys! Love the blog, I check it everyday. I’m more of a lurker but I do occasionally throw out some snark.
With a name like that I’d expect you to be hip-checking Sparkies back to grade school. You should snark more. It’s good for you! Doctors say if you don’t let your snark out at least once a week it can build up in your system and eventually cause you to look like Newt Gingrich. Why do you think Newt looks like that? They don’t call it “Gingrivitis” for nothing.
I just figured he got hit in the face with an ugly stick.
I’m telling you, he’s a shaved bear.
And what is his wife’s excuse?
She is plastic.
She’s a deer in the headlights. *Bambi go SMACK!*
Gingrivitis is contagious. She’s also part hypno-toad.
She’s part marmoset.
YSAC is like a hive in a truck.
Some stay and others get lost, only to find themselves back again.
Let’s knock this day out of its minty shell and get 1000 comments.
Come on lurky peoples, it’s happened before…
Wow, 1000 posts – and I only discovered YSaC last summer, and I still haven’t finished catching up on the archive. Completely snarkless today as I’ve actually had a good day, and hubby’s coming home tonight and will be on a local job for the next 4 weeks so I’m all happy, and now it’s the 1000th YSaC post and I’m getting all gushy and emotional…
*happy sigh*
Aww, thanks for keeping this going so long! I’m mostly a lurker, but a dedicated one, honest!
I’m a dedicated lurker, but can’t thank you enough for my daily dose of snark. I’ll have you to thank when I make millions from marketing my keyboard snort-guard, which prevents me from spitting coffee on my computer when I burst out laughing.
I’d like one in blue paisley, please. Do you accept palpal?
I’d like 1 for $10, or 2 for $35, or an obo. Let me know what you want.
Hi!
I only commented once before, but my favourite is cat math. It’s how I imagine my cat Lucy counting if she ever stopped jumping on the walls and crashing through the ceiling.
She actually did crash through the ceiling once…she got up into the drop ceiling. I came downstairs, and there was a ceiling tile on the floor, and I figured it out backwards. cat + ceiling tile = bad.
Anyways. I’m sure if she could read, she’d enjoy cat math too!
Amanda
Was the cat bedazzled at the time? Because I think the Beatles wrote a song about that.
Baby you can bedazzle my cat
No, no, it’s just a little flat
Baby you can bedazzle my cat
And baby I love you
Yes, I like it. I like it very much. I just don’t post comments because I don’t have anything up to the witty standard expected here. Thank you for all your efforts.
We have standards? Who knew?
I have a standard, I carry it with me into battle.
:unfurls flag:
See? It’s three cats rampant above a painted toenail.
++++++ Adores for the standard comment!1!1!1
Do firm Obos count as standards?
*cornersmack*
I have standards, just not very high ones.
A standard is just a line, only smaller. Therefore, they are easier to cross.
Wait, wait. Hold on.
We have standards?! When did this happen? Who set the rules? And why the hell was I let in? Somebody’s not doing their background checks here — but to whomever does: That thing in San Diego with the giraffe was a total misunderstanding.
Bacontini knew he forget to do someting.
Screen de commenters dey tell him. Is an important job to keep de riff and de raff at bay. But den, de ladies, dey be talking to de Bacontini and he get destracted. So now Bacontini have to be making up de paperwork showing dat all dese people meet de harsh standards.
Of course, de ladies always meet de Bacontini’s standards. Dat is why he is always here for everyone, especially de ladies.
We have witty standards? Why does no one tell me these things?
Stephen, honestly, the standards are all in your imagination. Please comment, and with practice, it will get easier and easier, and one day, you, too, will end up in the box!
And the curve is pretty shallow. I comment here, so how hard can it be?
The trick is to just keep commenting until you accidently say something that’s actually funny. Just don’t let anyone else know my trick.
*looks around*
Cheese it, I think they’re on to me!
Thank you for this amazing blog. I am entertained by the posts and comments everyday at lunchtime. Makes the work day more bearable. Congrats on reaching 1000 posts.
So uh… what page of de Walrus Sutra is de Retro Style on? Bacontini can’t seem to find it.
*Flips through the book again*
Huh, juggling de bucket…
But Stephen, it should be quite obvious after 1,000 volumes that we have absolutely and utterly no standards…except the YSaC Standard (minty lettering in the shape of cheese doodles on a red background) which we fly from swingsetforts and bees truck antennas.
Edit:
*sigh* refresh before post
*sigh* refresh before post
*sigh* refresh before post
Find Stephen’s GPS coordinates and relocate this comment.
A Limerickal tribute to YSAC
Along came Ostrimu** and Llamanun*
Who started this blog that is so much fun
Began not.a.lion
Starts Sparkys’ a cryin’
A thousands posts in and they’re far from done
And from where came the table that’s red
You can take it for free that was said
Forever in lore
It’s never a bore
Our mostest famous table instead
And from minty shell came the Corey
Tagged, so we know why it’s borey
Candorman is lame
I still say the same
Wow, there’s lots of bees in that lorry
That Sparkys’ can’t count earns our wrath.
It’s truly not so hard like a graph
With six sides to a square
I give you a dare
Can you teach an old cat some new math?
And Lionel’s head made me sneeze
When to me it wafted its breeze
We all know it’s a trap
It’ll catch some poor sap
So the second mouse gets all the cheese
And bedazzled shit does abound
The crap from their attics’ that’s found
Haunted hawk to impress
Psycho doll, she’s a mess
And a sandbox boat run aground?
And if you can’t capture my gist
I still wonder if Sparkys’ are pissed
The fun that we make
oh, for Spice Christ sake
With such snark there’s just too many to list
So by now you know what I’m sayin’
For this site to endure I’m a prayin’
Roosters and typewriters
Zombs and roofer roofers
Many thanks to all the –Oh, shiny
*many many many bees be upon
**and some more bees
Spacebug wrote a poem longer than before,
Though the denizens here surely wanted more.
Clamoured they did,
So from them he hid,
But still would recieve many adore.
Not a regular commenter, but hey! Congrats on this massive milestone! I always enjoy reading this blog and sharing the classic finds with my friends. Keep on doing what you do!
Gee, that tiger sure looks cheerful. And has an impressive mane. For a tiger.
Maybe it’s a liger…
http://graphics1.snopes.com/photos/animals/graphics/liger1.jpg
Little known fact* – Tigers flare their manes to attract mates and scare away rivals, much in the same way peacocks use their impressive tail feathers to frighten sharks while attracting females.
*Because I made it up.
Ghostie, your facts are correct. Generally, the most traffic I encounter on my way to work is a flock of peacocks. The males often have their tails flared. The females are all atwitter and there is nary a shark in sight.
Congrats! Love the blog. It’s snarky without being cruel and witty without resorting to played out jokes.
No played out jokes … but plenty of our own site-generate memes with lots of mileage on them!
We here at YSaC are always way ahead of the curve. Pecil isn’t even in listed in Urban Dictionary yet.
Hooray for M posts! I haven’t been commenting because I’ve been reading through the archives… ALL of them. I expect I’ll be back sometime next January. (This would go faster for me if you’d all stop making more of them. Darn kids.)
I do want to add that I love this site and you’ve helped me with both homework and dog training. 🙂
One of my teachers requires vocabulary lists of new words and this site is one of the few places where people regularly use words that are new to me (Thanks, CapnMac and Isaac)
Also, my roommates got a dog and while he was still a puppy we had to teach him what was acceptable to chew on and what wasn’t. I started taking unacceptable things away from him, saying “Not.A.Toy!” He got the message and to this day, if I say “Not a toy, Charlie!” he drops whatever he has.
Keep up the good work, and congrats to the Llamanun, BBUH.
See… now I feel guilty. Am I the only one that hasn’t read all of the archives?*
*I tried one weekend, but had to quit because I needed to get some sleep.
Yes, LL. It’s required reading here. Otherwise, how are you going to recognize the memes when we bring them up?
That’s easy… help make them! LL’s done enough of that, for sure. And really, I wouldn’t recommend reading through the archives, it’s *VERY* time-consuming. I’m just stubborn/compulsive.
I suppose we could make another stab at updating the Wiki, too . . .
All I know is that if more YSaC folks start blogs (and that counts for those occasional commenters as well), I’m going to have to quit my day job.
Last week I spent half a day reading on someone’s blog (occasional commenter) and now I can’t remember who’s it was. But it was funny.
Flew in from [location] Beach, BOAC
Didn’t get to ALL HAIL HYPNO-DOGS last night
On the way the swingfortslide was on my knee
Man, I had a dreadful flight
I’m back in the YSaC
Hanging out with cardboard Bea
Back in the YSaC
Been away so long I hardly knew the place
Gee, it’s good to be back home
Leave it till tomorrow to unbluble my case
Honey, disconnect the phone
I’m back in the YSaC
In a truck full of bees
Back in the YS
Back in the YS
Back in the YSaC
Well the [femaletraits1] girls really knock me out
They leave the rest behind
And Ish girls make me snark and shout
They [location]’s always on my my my my my my my my my mind
Oh, show me round your vintage
crisco way down south
Take me to you mine hores farm
Let me hear your minty engines ringing out
Come and keep your pecil warm
I’m back in the YSaC
Hey, with some cheese from Lionel Ritche
Back in the YSaC.
Happy 1,000 YSaC!
Second Beatles effort today. Nice!
Just letting you know, you missed XLIX. So this post probably isn’t actually M.
Just letting you know, you missed XXXIX. So this post probably isn’t actually M.
(Fixed from previous comment where I said the wrong number, AND got the Roman numeral for it wrong. >_<)
* puts pillowcase over Martimus *
I need an available auntie closet. One that goes to Nunavet. Hurry, my arms are getting tired!
You’ve been shanghaied, Marti… 🙂
Well… I gotta let Marti go.
There is no post XXXIX – BUT, there is an extra post title ‘Submission’… so technically, post XXXIII is really XXXIX… and now I’ve confused myself and must go lie down with my 44 oz strawberries and cream daiquiri and ponder the meaning.
[number stuff corey]
There’s also an iteration thing, where, really, things are counted from the 0th position.
This is different than items of duration, like units of time, where you start the clock at 0, and it only gets to 1 at the end of the sequence. So, a person “turns” ten at the beginning of their eleventh year.
With some variation by culture, the Chinese enumerate you as “1” on the day you are born; 12 months’ later, they’d call you “2.”
But, it’s also why the 21st Century really began 00:00:00.000001 1 Jan 2001 GMT–such pedantic precision is easily erased by centuries and millenia and aeons and the like. People tend to forget that the Jurassic Age was about 54 million (yes, 10^6) years’ duration–give or take 0.4 to 0.6 megayears (400 to 600 millenia)–a target that could be hit even with a dollar-store flux capacitor.
Ok, I thought this might be a sock puppet to get use to read back in the dustier archives (for the record, I miss Stephanae & Isaac’s contributions).
But, “martimus” may be the alias of Dan Brown–page 257 to 260 are 404 Not Found. Leaving us to speculate upon aliens or literati illuminae afoot.
Or, wait, that’s the front door . . .
The poster is not.a.sock, but a recent invitee to the site.
Sorry about my utter lack of presence today. I was really hoping to do some great lurking and commenting for the 1000th post but then I was scheduled as surgery technician and my day was shot. u.u
I don’t remember when I first encountered YSaC, but I’m so glad I did. It’s one of the few blogs that I keep up on. This is a very funny group and you set a really high bar. Congratulations, drmk and Dan! I’m looking forward to more suck!
sd
*gasp*
YSaC has corner lurkers!! sd has just provided proof that there are more people in the corner than we realize. No wonder it’s so crowded all the time.
Yayyyyy for M posts!!!!!
That not.a.tiger is totally freaking me out with its legs. THEY DON’T MAKE SENSE.
It’s like the joints have been removed.
I rather think the problem — for the artist, anyway — is too many joints.
I just think that those are not the places that legs grow from.
Quite amoeba-esque if you ask me.
It’s been a busy week, with not much time to comment, but I couldn’t let this pass. Thanks so much, drmk! You’re doing a great job, along with Dan and Windrose. I love this blog, I love the commenters, and if I didn’t have anything else to do I’d spend all my time on this blog.
I know most of the Craigslist posters who make such a cockup of their posts wouldn’t understand 90% of the snark, but wouldn’t it be great if we could make them see how utterly stupid and ridiculous they are? My secret wish is that one day, everyone in the world would wake up able to spell correctly. But then, what would we do for amusement? Oh right, we’d still have the Not.A.Lions!
Congratulations on your millennium-a-versary. You’re the Bees Knees!
This day could not be a true 1,000th post if there was no coreying. So, here goes.
[corey]Millennium refers to a period of 1,000 years, and is not really applicable on this occasion.[/corey]
Quite correct, Letterman!
Now explain how the “anni” in anniversary is directly related to the Latin “anno” and ought only refer to annual evolutions. (not that we have a handy term-of-art for “nth repetition of” that suits english-speakers as well as “anniversary”)
Annus, Anni Noun 2nd Declension Masculine
year (astronomical/civil); age, time of life; year’s produce; circuit, course (definition from William Whitaker’s Words)
Nom S: Annus
Gen S: Anni
Dat S: Anno
Acc S: Annum
Abl S: Anno
Voc S: Anne (although I don’t know why you’d ever need to use the vocative in regards to annus)
Nom P: Anni
Gen P: Annorum
Dat P: Annis
Acc P: Annos
Abl P: Annis
Voc P: Anni
Whew! I was afraid I was going to miss the party! Thanks for the nudge, Lola! I miss YSaC and the incredible snark and humor – there is not nearly enough of that in my daily life anymore! Dan and drmk, congrats on 1,000 posts! May Craigslist posters continue to suck!
Yay Manda’s here!! Here… grab a sammich on your way back out the door. I promise, nobody spit in it.
Wow! Manda and Grampdaddy show up on the same day. Who’d a thunk it!
See you tomorrow Kiddo!
I love YSAC. It puts the snark in my day.
Congrats all! As you know I only snark on occasion (seriously, I blame my inability to understand the Reply features. For example, today it says I could reply to creepy puppy’s post “We’ve made it to a grand” and IF’s answer and even TacoMagic’s answer to that, but what I REALLY want to reply to is TBS’s answer about Victoria Secret models about 16 comments down. . .but I can’t! *sobs*), but I read this site nearly everyday.
And I STILL can’t believe Not.A.Lion is a thing. How can so many people have missed WILD KINGDOM??
Kids these days, I tell ya.
By the way, the Line dropped me a post card the other day. It said “Not. Ever.”
TelcaCat, are you using the mobile version or the, well, whatever we call the non-mobile version here?
The phone/portable device software occasionally does not support all the features.
The other issue is that WordPress only allows nesting three deep. Which is much less obvious on a phone screen.
The way that works is, for a situation like:
You can reply anywhere the red reply key appears, but, you go to the end of that “queue” of comments.
So
Comment will have a reply
Comment
Comment400
Comment
SubComment will have a reply.
SubComment
SubComment
200
SubSubComment will have a reply
300
100
But, replying to Comment goes to the end–at 100 above.
Replying to SubComment goes to its end–at 200.
Replying to SubSubComment goes to its end, too–at 300.
Now, on a large screen, there are background shades to show this (that and our Admins get a green box).
Now, if you wanted to make a comment at 400, above, it will appear at 100.
So, your best bet is to either reference them, or quote them.
If you are comfortable (or your screen interface allows), you can use the
<blockquote> </blockquote> html pair. Any text in the middle will follow WordPress’ current convention of a big grey box with a stylized double quote graphic–note, bold, emphasis, delete html are allowed inside the quote box.
Hope that helps some, any, at all.
Yay! That helps a ton! I will squirrel this away for future snark. Thank you!
Capn, that should go in the forum in a special sticky spot, labeled help with navigating replys.
Emerging from my french provisional armour, where I normally lurk, to congratulate you on 1000 posts! Looking forward to the next 1000!
I read. I laugh. I never comment. Way to go on your 1000th post!
Couldn’t end the day without say this:
“CONGRADUMALATIONS DMRK AN DAND!”
“UNDER NEAT THAT”
“HERE’S TO ONE THOUSAND MORE!” (write in numbers)
saying*
*sigh*
I wrecked writing a wreck.
It’s a meta-wreck, Archie. That makes it “even better.”
I first discovered the site somewhere in November 2009, and I think my first comment was a comment about an ottoman on #530.
camille’s post in the don’t suck box has a bunch of weird html code at the end. I think someone likes the funky monkey a little too much. Either that, Funky Monkey’s post is missing from the box. Just thought I’d point it out… though I have a feeling I’m a little too late.
So I forgot to close the quotation in the string for FM, and it overlapped Camille’s. Should be all better now. Wish I had been able to fix it sooner. Sorry, FM!
Just noticed (scrolling through the sidebar investigated what Zia was reporting)
that the f/b YSaC page has 4840 Friends.
While we could take that to mean there is quite a bit of lurking going on, it really raises the point of what will happen with another 160 want to join. The f/b limit is only 5000.
Which generally means having to run some sort of parallel-universe thing until we work out which of Schrodinger’s cats urped in the shoe and all.
Are you sure? I know this one site has like, 400k likes on Facebook. They’re trying for 750k, I believe.
Also, I tried taking out the weird html code. It led me to Funky Monkey’s post. So it’s camille whose post is missing. 8D
“Likes” and “Friends” are different on f/b.
Probably a left-over from the original coding the Z-man set up, not anticipating that entertainers would eventually join to keep touch with their fans.
The “social media” person for such pages will eventually get to where they want to sort out the real fans from socks, spam, and the like, and create a related page. This can create a fascinating rush as 4-5000 fans try to “get in before the lock” (to use a different, if still apt, forum phrase).
1000th post, a true milestone. Good job, and keep it coming, I think everyone knows that there is more fail from where this crawled out of!
Sorry this is so very late! I closed on my new home today, signed approximately a billion papers at the bank, ate some lunch, and then proceeded to melt onto the couch in the summertime-like heat and didn’t get online until 11:30 pm. Tomorrow I begin moving in to the new place and painting.
CONGRATS ON 1,000 ENTRIES! KEEP ON SNARKING!
I think someone ran over that actually.a.lion
Congratulations new homeowner!
What makes me really sad is that Dan does Dubuque isn’t a real thing.
Congratulations and thank you for this site.
Punchity Punch Punch, Mindfield, funky monkey, Camille, Sister Lyle, Space Bug, CJ, Dave, Ferret, HamCan, and last but not least, Irregular Fractal.
G’Night, Dubuque!
Just a pop-in to let you know that I enjoy your posts immensely, on a daily basis. Thanks for cracking me up.
i love this blog. ive been following it for i think a year, but i rarely comment. sigh
I’ve been following this for a few months, and I’ve never commented. But there’s got to be a first for everything.
Congratulations on your 1000th post!
Welcome Kitten .. always good to see felines on YSaC. Here’s to long and many postings – we’re friendly really
*sends PURR to Kitten*
TP
Hey – don’t mock true Tigers – know what I’m saying!?
All hail Llamanun and Ostrimu for their bravery in starting this website. Let’s all celebrate with nachos and slices of coffee!
much and many congratulations
TP
perfect choice for 1000th post!
I don’t really comment on blogs, but I love yours! Congrats on 1000 posts!
i’ve been lurking here since the dawn of time (i think). commented only once before, when drmk asked nicely, and couldnt resist again…
wanted to say hi, and thanks. this is a cozy corner of the interwebs where i feel at home. few months ago when i finished my degree and couldnt find a job, i read the whole blog from the I. i swear, it made me feel better.
I am very very late due to super hectic weekend but wanted to officially record my thanks to the Llamanun* and Ostrimu** for their continued awesomeness and all the comments-whanau for your snark. You guys are awesomesauce and make my life happier (and snarkier), while helping me learn things!! Adores from the bottom of the world.
*BBUH
**And also upon Him.
i’m a lion. oh wait…a tiger. either way…RAWR!!!!
Commenting as asked! I love this blog. Thank you for the joy you bring to our snarky, editorial selves. And congratulations on your longevity. May you continue long past minty.
I’ve been reading since near the beginning, having followed your link from a comment on another blog (it was either Horrible License Plates or Passive-Aggressive Notes, I forget which). You had fewer than 20 posts up at the time. So I have been reading nearly the entire time!
mazeltov on the 1000th post!
also, i can no longer view a lion or a tiger without thinking of ysac. i am thrilled to report that the last art i saw [sunday] that called an animal a ‘tiger’ actually was…..a tiger.
e~
Keep up the good work! Millions of cubicle dwellers rely on this website to feel superior to others after 8 hours of fluorescent lighting.
Congrats on the 1000th and thanks for the laughs!
Awww cute 🙂 I love this site, its almost always funny but sometimes it makes me roll around laughing… the original rofl, tho I prefer not-the-floor. I’ve had almost zero internet for the past three months, so just catching up! I’ve actually asked one of my friends to remind me to read it when I’m sad. I’m not even entirely sure why it makes me laugh as much as it does… my attempts to summarise never seem as funny. Kudos!