YSaC, Vol. 936: Knights in White Satan
Well, good evening ladies and gentlemen. I’m the Church Lady, and welcome to a special edition of Church Chat.
Tonight we’re going to look at Craigslist. It may seem like a perfectly harmless online site, but is it really? Can we really trust a site which promises that if you just spend enough time and money it will always give you what you reeaally want, but where you really just end up spending more and more time desperately searching for something to give your empty life meaning? Hmmmm?
And who is this “Craig”, really? I think we’re going to find out.
WEDDING-BlackSatanChairSash – $50
99 BLACK satan chair sashes. New=.99/each. Will sell for .50cents/each or $50.00 total.
Well, isn’t that special? Let’s see what else we can find.
Picture of Kate Greenaway (?) – $60
I believe I have a picture of Kate Greenaway, framed painting on satan. Asking $60.00 Please call ###-###-#### if interested
I think things are getting a LITTLE clearer here now, don’t you?
1996satan sc2 – $1300
nice little two door staned 113000 miles ###-###-#### get it before the gas price gos up. will sell for more then today only 1000.00
I think we all know who “Craig” is now, don’t we? Could it be…..
Thanks for the posts, Jeremy, Keri, and Eric!
Huh…and here I thought the Devil drove a Coupe de Ville.
With gas prices the way they are, he had to trade it in.
Now the Devil drives a Prius when he goes down to Georgia.
“Bad to the Bone” blaring out his speakers all the way, amiright?
But more importantly… does Satan have a minty shell?
He does, but it’s a fake mint that smells like mouthwash tastes.
‘Cause he’s evil.
That might explain how it is that when one sees a prius on the highway there always seems to be a jerk driving it.
I don’t want “staned” satan. I like nice, clean satan.
Come on, try and be reasonable here. There Satan is, lording over a hot hell all day with all the fire and the brimstone and the lawyers and keeping a special place all nice and clean and prepared for the arrival of the guy who invented reality TV. Not to mention all the whipping and torturing and searing sodomy and baking cookies he’ll pretend to offer his subjects only to yank them away at the last minute. I mean, he’s a busy guy, and do you know how brimstone gets into your skin? Sometimes you just have to let that stuff exfoliate naturally.
You forgot to mention how he’s constantly having to adjust his pantyhose – an invention of his – and how his 3″ heels – yep, another of Satan’s specialties – keep getting caught on all the pumice.
Sounds like “Him” from the Powerpuff Girls.
And then he gets a run in his hose because he broke one of his false nails, and his mascara starts coming off and giving him raccoon eyes.
And then his bra strap breaks! What, you didn’t know Satan dressed in drag?
Well, only on Thursdays..and Sundays (just to piss God off)…and alternating Tuesdays when it’s not his turn at the Bingo drum.
Trying to fit overpriced stilettoes on over cloven hoofs must be challenging, not to mention finding makeup that doesn’t clash with red skin … and wigs that can be arranged around horns …
I hear he also likes to be called Delores.
It makes him feel pretty.
And, per Matt and Trey, he has to get away from Saddam some of the time . . .
But where’s the fetus going to gestate? In a box?
That would explain some people I’ve met, Windrose.
I dunno, Kate looks a little young in that pic, and I don’t recall her being blonde. [this assumes the one on the right is Satan – Satan always wears a bonnet, right?]
She also bears a striking resemblance to Holly Hobby.
The one on the right must be Satan, what kind of secret would Kate Greenaway be whispering to Satan?
Kate- “Ummm… Satan. Remember when I said I would give you my soul to be famous? I was expecting a little more.”
Satan- “WHAT!?!? You dare question me, you are a famous illustrator of children’s books.”
Kate- “But I see all these men, like Edison, Westinghouse, Carnegie and Rockefeller. I know you gave them the same deal.”
Satan- “But they are men! Do you know what year this is? What century? Okay, okay, here’s the deal, when you die, I will bring you back as a famous man.”
Kate- “Sounds interesting. I have always been curious about pants. And although I have a few whiskers, I’m curious how I’d look with a mustache. Can you tell me what I’ll be famous for?”
Satan- “You will have to trust me, this will sound ludicrous. You will draw a cartoon mouse.”
Kate- “Hmmm… okay. I think I will name him Mickey after my pet cat, that will be funny. Get it, naming a mouse after my cat? Hee-hee-hee, giggle, giggle, poot… sorry a case of the vapors.”
Satan- “Fine then.” Satan evaporates with a cloud of smoke..
And that is how Mickey Mouse got his name… and you can have illustrated proof for just the low price of $60…
I’m absolutely certain that’s how Beatrix Potter got started.
No relation to Hairy Potter, correct?
That must be a haunted hawk in the bonnet
This one?
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=5336
Yep, but any ol’ haunted hawk would do.
Pshuh…they’re a dime a dozen…
OBO!
I wonder how the black satan sashes will look on my French provisional chairs. I also see a bit of cat math going on.
Satan invented cat math. It’s devilishly tricky and you’ll have a hell of a time understanding it, unless you’re a cat.
Not to imply that cats are evil or anything.
Oh cats aren’t evil..nuh-uh, no way…
They’re just little
satansaliens in fur suits.I’ll be in my
bunksquirrel costume.As someone who has seen a hairless cat, I completely agree with CJ.
Now I can take my baby eating chair out on the town!
The satan ‘staned’ 113000 miles? That’s a long distance for anyone/anything to stan.
Stan in the place where you live (Why’s he here?)
Think about eviction, wonder why you haven’t before
Stan in the place where you work (He’s stalking me)
Think about a restraining order, sneaking out the back door
I think I may have seen this deja vu before…
:in a spooky graveyard outside of [location]:
“Excuse me, little emo boy; is this where the satanists are meeting?”
“Umm, yeah.”
“Oh, good! I can’t wait to meet more satan enthusiasts!”
“Dude, why are you so … shiny and colorful?”
“I’m wearing my best satan for the meeting! I just love how silky it is, don’t you?”
“Ummm…”
“Hey, guys; is this where the satanists are meeting?”
“It sure is! Are you a fellow satan enthusiast?”
“Not really. I’m selling my staned satan to someone and they told me to meet them here.”
Tell me, tell me about El Diablo, or I will play this barrel organ for hours!
1996 Satan would mean he’s only 15 – jail bait. But with 113000 miles he should very experienced. Is the $1300/$1000 a per hour or per day charge?
Wait – you mean this wasn’t in the “Casual Encounters” section? Forget I said anything. I’d head to the corner but it seems awfully crowded over there lately.
Don’t worry, we put in a basement. Now there’s plenty of room!
Coffee slice?
Yeah, Satan will come around. You just need to give him time. Or Stockholm Syndrome. Either way…
You think he needs to have a little chat with my friend, Mr. Crowbar?
I was thinking cigarette burns and hog tying, but sure, if blunt force trauma is your thing…
It’s great cardio.
Remember, keep your shoulders square and hit through him.
I have this same problem with those misguided children who always insist on sending Satan a letter to his house in the North Pole during the month of December.
Apparently, Satan is EVERYwhere and he gets his minion reindeer and little people to do his bidding….
When I was young I used to send a letter to Stan every year. Nice guy, always wrote back asking me who I was and why I was bothering him.
You’re lucky Stan wasn’t a member of NAMBLA or he might have bought you a pony.
OT: Your pen pal story reminded me of the movie Mary and Max. I just love that little gem.
FOR PONY!
Don’t fwoosh me, bro.
Here comes Beelzebub
Here comes Beelzebub
Right down Beelzebub Lane
Volac and Barbas and all his minions
Are making fire rain
Heads are rolling in lawn bowling
Satan scored a strike!
Hang your neighbors from the swings
‘Cos Beelezebub comes tonight!
Awesome MF. I have a hankering for Michael Keaton and eggnog now. I don’t know why.
I like Michael Keaton. I don’t think there’s ever a bad time for Michael Keaton. Especially fire-roasted with a nice chardonnay.
OT OT [indignant matt] So, many of you know about the manuscript I wrote and how I’ve been pitching and pitching and pitching to every publisher in the lower 48.
A brief synopsis – it’s the story of a young girl living in Indiana in the 50’s who has a mysterious elderly neighbor. The girl, through the neighbor, discovers her own magical powers and visits a future land via a portal inside the neighbors pantry.
Well, this morning as I perused Amazon for books, what do I find? A new book that deals with a time-travel portal that exists in a man’s storeroom and takes him and his friend back to the 50’s!
Sound familiar? Yes, not exactly my story but it’s close.
Harumph…double harumph…
Who is the author you say? Oh some upstart….named Stephen King or something like that.
Dammit.
[/end indignant matt]
Stephen King is secretly an alien and has been stealing your brainwaves. The bastard.
Stephen King…..
🙂
CJ: Sounds a bit like the storyline of Coraline
mudsy – never read Coraline…guess I’ll have to now. 🙂
:edited after a quick run over to Amazon: Oh yeah…that book…now I know what you are talking about…I haven’t read it but I’ve heard about it.
@ SJ…that’s what I get for sleeping with the windows open…damned zomb…
See?!?! “Guarded by clowns” isn’t such a ludicrous idea now, is it CJ?
“My God, Prime Minister! Do you store your nukes in a pagoda guarded by stuffed animals?”
Well, most of my good ideas for books were already written by Phillip K Dick.
(Aside: Was a cool link I saw the other day, the next/best ten PKD books that ought be made into movies.)
I’d do a “Satan went down to Craigslist” parody… but I’m pretty sure I already did that a while ago.
You could do a “Santa Went Down to Craigslist” parody. I’m pretty sure that hasn’t been done yet. But if you do, you must promise me that Charlie Daniels dies. I hate that fat tub-o-pudding.
NOTE: I only am beating the Santa Horse to death because (real story), when my spawn was very young, she decided to draw an Xmas picture that she wanted me to put on the refrigerator.
It said: “I <3 Satan" So I did.
*knock, knock* *opens door* Yes?
Lady, I got your Satan bows here.
Oh, yes, put them on that table over there next to the Christ head.
Got it. And what about the Greenaway on Satan picture?
Just lean it against that pole in the pot of cement, please.
Right, And here are the keys to the 1996 Satan SC2. It’s in the driveway.
Awesome. After I redecorate in here, I’m going to drive down to Georgia.
By the way, is it some kind of wedding trend to hide chairs under white sheets and throw black sashes over them? Because I find the effect kind of creepy looking, and not at all one of my favorite things.
All your calassay KKK weddings are doing this, now.
[corey]In an effort to make sure that nothing so hideous as an actual chair sullies the perfection of Bridezilla’s magical day, there are special chair cozies that make them look like they are wearing silly little dresses. [/corey]
I only know this because one of my coirkers is getting married and I have had to listen to the exaustive debate over whether she should get ones that match her dress or ones that match the tablecloths.
*passes flask*
I know I’ve been to weddings with the chairs done up in drag/dresses and sashes, but can’t for the life of me actually remember what they looked like, which makes me think that the answer to that question is “It doesn’t ******** matter.”
I may have suggested she dress them up to look like Smurfs; it was lunch time and I was trying to read my book so I don’t remember what I told her but I’m almost positive it was something from my Smartass Spring Collection.
[more corey]It’s so that the chairs will match any decoration theme, without having to have 14,000 sets of chairs. These “chair dresses” come in many colors, and will make one set of chairs match any of 14,000,000 decoration themes.[/corey]
Don’t try to impress logic and practicality upon us now. We’re set in our ways and slow to embrace anything so matchy-matchy!
🙁
That’s why the [corey] tags, so you can feel free to ignore the opportunity to expand your mind, if you so choose.
: P
It’s still putting clothes on furniture.
If crazy people do that, they get a Love Me jacket and a thorazine drip. When wedding planners do it,they call it “accessorizing” and charge a couple hundred extra for it.
AR: My mother said that to me once. Once.
🙂
sj, I didn’t say I thought it was a *good* idea, I was corey-ing up the matching phenomenon. Lots of people do lots of things that we here know are just plain crazy. But they keep doing them.
Perhaps that explains the group of bridesmaids I saw not long ago whose dresses looked to have been made from tablecloths. (And tablecloth that would not have flattered a table’s figure, either.)
Random thought: If enough red wine is spilled on the damask tablecloth does that make it a staned satan? Hmm, plonk as tie-dye . . .
Most bridesmaids’ dresses could be improved by the application of adult beverages, either externally or internally.
The one my sister made me wear for her wedding made me look more like a disgruntled couch than a table, though.
*scrubbing mental image of paisley dress with throw pillows and a sham as dress out of head*
*now trying to not picture BMD in naughahyde with clear plastic cover, too*
Bridesmaids’ dresses have only one purpose: to make the bride look pretty by comparison.
Some rich/celeb bride-to-be, whose IQ and shoe size were eerily similar, probably bought the “Wake decor” book instead of the Wedding Reception version…
Because she couldn’t wake to get married.
I think they’re supposed to be attached to the chairs with Clothespin Jesus-es (just in time for Easter!) .
8)
Do everyone’s comments get the “Awaiting Moderation” treatment, or am I just lucky?
Edit: And of course, this one doesn’t.
Mine did the other day. I thought perhaps my comment had torqued off the Message Board Gods. I’m still awaiting their vengeful wrath.
Edit: Apparently this one makes them angry as well as it is ‘awaiting moderation.’
I just checked and there are no messages waiting. Are you sure you addressed it properly and afixed a stamp to the upper right corner?
Knowing my luck I put the stamp on upside down.
When I was young and wrote letters on a regular basis (before ‘net and cell phones took the fountain pen from my hand), putting the stamp on upside down was Secret Teenage Code for “I love you.” SisterTaco, perhaps the Message Board Gods are just embarrassed and flustered at your unintentional declaration of affection.
They’re on to me!! *flees*
No, but all my “Adores” were running backwards earlier. I think today’s subject may be toying with us a bit.
Not mine (FF on XP Pro SPIII).
Now, “adores” have not “stuck” in months–but that’s the only aberrant page behaviour I’ve seen of late
He opened his little black day-planner and studied it carefully, pen poised over the filled lines, a crease in his brow. Well, this was troublesome. He just had so much to do today already.
With a resigned sigh, he squeezed in a line of nearly unintelligible scribbles between his 2 o’clock “tempt a priest” and his 3 o’clock “mock the souls in the pedophile ward.”
With that done, he snagged his red bonnet and tied it snugly onto the top of his blond and pig-tailed head. There were errands to run and he needed to look his best. No one would take an untidy Satan seriously, especially when his plan for the day included looking like the eldest daughter from “Little House on the Prairie.”
Top-side, Satan headed down the street, swinging his little wicker basket back and forth as he skipped. His ‘little frontier girl guise’ was perfect, he was sure to fit in with the humans. He didn’t notice the odd looks cast his way; he was too intent on his mission.
The stop at the church didn’t take nearly as long as he had expected it to. Relieved that he had more time than originally planned, Satan quickly made his way across town to the used car lot. Standing on the sidewalk just outside the parking area, he quickly whipped out the day-planner and crossed off the priest. He squinted carefully at the scribbles squeezed in to double-check that this was the proper lot. Satisfied, he put his book back in his basket and walked between a row of clunkers toward the center building.
He was met halfway by a tall man in a ridiculously sized cowboy hat. “Well, Howdy, lil’ lady. Are ya lost?”
Satan shook his head, gazing around at the cars. “Nope, I’m looking for the 1996 Satan SC2 you had posted online. I’m in the market for a new ride and I think it might be up my alley.”
The man blinked down at the twelve-year-old. Then he glanced around his otherwise unoccupied lot, trying to find either the hidden camera or the group of vagrants pranking him. His eyes returned to the serious face of the child.
“I’m sorry, Miss, but ya do have ta be sixteen ta drive, ya know.”
Satan’s eyes narrowed. “I’ll have you know I’m far older than you. I find it rather rude that you’d make such assumptions based solely on my size.”
The cowboy became slightly uncomfortable looking. Satan smiled inwardly. It was always so much fun messing with the minds of mortals. He could see the gears working in the car salesman’s head, slowly turning over the information.
“Ah,” the cowboy finally said, trying his best to plaster the fake car-salesman smile on his face. “Well, now, Ma’am, I do have that car you mentioned. But maybe one o’ these might be what ya lookin’ for. Much better for a person of your stature.”
The salesman walked over to a mini-cooper and patted the top of the car with his mitt-sized hand. Satan tilted his head at the vehicle, frowning slightly in thought.
“Let me see the Satan, first.”
Obediently, the cowboy led the little girl over to the car in question. “It’s got a lot more miles on it,” the salesman was saying. “And the fuel efficiency just ain’t the same. I really suggest a smaller car for ya.”
“Are you mocking my height?” The devil shot a dark look at the cowboy, who visibly started. Then the child-shaped being returned his scrutiny to the car sitting before it. It was red. Red was good. And there was flame striping on it. That was fitting, too. Slowly, he walked around the entire body of the car, checked the tires, peered under the vehicle, and then surveyed the inside through the driver’s side window.
“It’s nice,” Satan said slowly, hand on his chin as he stood back from the car. “But I’m not pleased with those stains.” The child-hand pointed at a conspicuous splotch on the seats. “Show me the clown car.”
An hour, and a very awkward test-drive (for the salesman, at least) later, and the devil stood at the cowboy’s desk. A slew of paperwork sat on top of the shiny surface and the salesman was working to fill it all out.
“All right, then. We’ll get this all filled out and you’ll be on ya way. What’s ya name, Ma’am? ”
“Craig.”
The salesman’s pen paused over his paperwork. It was going to be a long day.
Bravo, Sister T! Very well done. 🙂
Thanks! I was hoping that this ‘wall of text’ wouldn’t scare off potential readers 🙂
Having written a few walls of text in my time, I can say that it doesn’t seem to bother many folks here. Nicely done. 🙂
Oh no…we loves us some walls ‘o text, but only when so deftly applied.
The Snark Lounge is built from Walls O’ Text.
And cupcakes.
…and coffee slices..but only in the corners..
and sammiches!
The many, many corners.
I thought the Snark Lounge was built on the tears of unrequited unicorn love, generic cigarettes and planks of stale chico sticks marinated in bourbon.
You’re thinking of the special in the Snark Lounge Cafe.
Bourbon makes everything better.
Except the morning after.
They have pills for that now.
Wait, what?
Snark Lounge: Room with fifty-elebenty corners… A profound polyhedronic room. Special anti-gravity suits required on some days when all of the “normal” corners are taken…
Jen, if you don’t *stop* drinking, there’s no “after.”
So I’ve heard…
Is that the one that’s only on Tuesday?
Because I’m pretty sure Friday involves fish….
Chairs in black satan, no not in that end,
I have a picture, Kate Greenaway…depends.
Nice little two door, could sell it for more.
Just what the truth is, I can Satan say ever more.
But I want you, yes I want you, oh how I want you anyway.
Gazing at paintings, some sc2’s are staned,
Just what I’m going to pay I can’t understand.
Some try to satan me, spelling can offend,
Just what you want to be, I have no idea in end.
But I want you, yes I want you, oh how I want you anyway.
Huh. I think I found the former bride-to-be. Looks like she pawned off her T-shirt, too.
Looks at bawks…blinks…slowly realizes…
Hey, I’m in the golden lotus with the freaky puppy! And, I’m on top!
:drags Smurf-festooned chair to corner:
Ahh…sammiches and coffee slices…
Well, you know, sometimes I like being the sub.
Always like coffee slices and cozy corners, though.
Dive! Dive! A-OOOOGa! Up Periscope!
Sorry, what were we discussing?
Windy made me giggle.
Glad you are in the box, Mz. CJ. You made me laugh out loud and nod “oh hell yes” when reading your comment. And all our kids are well adjusted, right?
Absolutely Archie…theyz crazy as theyz mama is…or should that be “are”?
Didn’t we already know that Craig was in cahoots with the dark side? Stephen Lynch wrote a song about it, aptly titled “Craig”.
Re: Yesterday’s comments about Looking For Group, Mike posted a link to the musical bit of Richard. See it here: http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=6195#comment-97679
Ooh, I’ve seen that! It’s funny.
[OT/] My toddler is sitting next to me telling me the story of your avatars. It seems that our cat has been out chasing all of your pets. Most of them will run away and hide but SJ’s cat is “sneepy” and Camille’s pup stays there and says “I’m so fuzzy!” And she’s renamed all the animals “Cassie” (the first ‘name’ she came up with for something when asked that was actually a name and not a nonsense word and therefore is given to pretty much anything and everything; I have shoes named Cassie). [/secretlivesofavatars OT]
sneepy = sleepy + sneaky
Yep, that’s
FireflyCassie.As we were discussion Stan Marsh earlier, I’d wandered over to the SouthPark web page. One of the featured items is an SP avatar-creator.
Have to wonder about such coincidences.
My pup is, in fact, so fuzzy, and she’s very fond of cats. (She absolutely hates most dogs, though.) So we approve of your toddler’s story. I wonder if my dog will answer to “Cassie.” She answers to just about anything else.
ShelbyCassie approves of his re-naming and offers his belly for skritches.I is* befuzzled as to why people always blame their bad taste on Satan? Isn’t he too busy toppling governments and creating chaos to worry whether or not your decor is black, white, or purple paisley. Now, if it’s really a low-level minion, I could understand that better.
*Yes. IS… as in ongoing, current, eternally.
Naw, what most people don’t understand is the profound and long-lasting effect that a really hideous set of curtains (with matching-clashing carpet) can have on a young human. The seething hatred of everything embodied in that colour scheme can, with the right nurturing, convenient introduction to persuasive authority figures and just the right amount of synthetic fur, turn a perfectly well-adjusted child into a roiling mass of hatred desperately seeking to unleash his or her fury and frustration onto an unsuspecting world.
Why bother with overthrowing a Government? So messy, and you just know there will be unintended side-effects, like democracy. Better to implant subtle visual clues from an early age, and let them ferment and foment through the drama of adolescence.
‘Course sometimes they move at a critical point during the process, stuffing everything up. That’s when you get your Charlie Sheens and LiLos. Even Satan wouldn’t claim responsibility for those trainwrecks!
Reminds me of Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. Anyone who has not read it must go get a copy NOW.
Seconded!
Ha, busted. I may have just re-read that last month. 🙂
I need to get me a copy and start a regular rereading schedule.
I have an autographed copy. Only by Gaiman, but still.
*likes Ostrimu even more*
::is jealous::
Speaking of whom, I’ve read a lot of Pratchett and not so much Gaiman. Any recommendations of where to start?
I’m infatuated with his Sandman graphic novels, and I also really enjoyed Anansi Boys, but I’m yet to read much more. Recommendations when you finish would be most appreciated. 🙂
ETA: Oh, and also totes jealous of the Ostrimu. Le sigh.
LOVED Anansi Boys. Even the children’s books are wonderful. Neverwhere is also great, but I found it disturbing in places. But that’s my fault and not the author’s.
Neverwhere was my first, but the Sandman series is also good. I had a friend in college (still know him) who is actually friends with Gaiman and has photo and other proof (yes, we were all jealous), so I heard A LOT about Sandman then. This was long enough ago that I was still dubious of graphic novels, but I ended up going back to and loving them after I read Neverwhere.
As for Good Omens, I had to buy another copy because the first had earned its retirement. 😀
I should also mention that I was on an email list in my college marching band where the members could select any actual name they wanted to appear in the “from” box. My personal favorite was receiving messages from “Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping (but secretly No Alcohol Lager)”
Terry Pratchett regularly does book signings at a neat book store near me, so I have Good Omens signed by Terry. He said he would only sign it if Gaiman hadn’t, so that every time Neil opened these books to sign, he’d see that Terry had been there first. 8)
Mr. Gaiman comes to Comic Con International regularly, but getting near him there is traumatic and time consuming. Plus the event is now priced out of my reach. Le Sigh.
Satin was frustrated.
Not vexed, or annoyed or out-of-sort; though those emotions applied too. No, Satin was frustrated, and to almost beyond words frustrated. Frustrated like a cat in a space station. Frustrated like a vegan polar bear. Frustrated like an agoraphobic with claustrophobia.
The problem, the on-going, never-ending, eternal Problem being that Satin was Evil. Not bad, not naughty, not even “shades the rules a bit, but is actually not a bad sort–but flat out evil. Evil in every possible way. Virtues made vices; good intentions gone wrong–no mere Murphy, either. Satin was just like that.
The problem, though, was that no one Believed.
In fact, few even much gave Satin a second thought.
No matter how Evil Satin was, no one much noticed, or even seemed to care that very much.
Why, they painted on poor old Satin. Satin was used to cover walls; to make bed and table clothes. Satin was even used to describe paint finishes–and not even the particularly evil hues; no, all sorts of warm, friendly, nice colors, the sort of thing that really set off that trim color on the casings and wainscots. Oh, and that spiffy chair-rail with the bed moulding smoothly finishing on a classic ogee . . . . See! Exactly that! Not EVIL at all!
Satin had tried, really tried. Satin had subverted Craig into making a list, and it was sometimes evil (if mostly in the spelling).
But, finally, Satin’s chance had come. The opportunity presented and it was leapt upon and seized like a pride of hungry cats finding and unattended smoked salmon. Satin’s revenge, REVENGE! was nigh, and none would escape!
Bridesmaids Dresses!
What? Orlon!? Lycra!? The universe is rent with quantum screams yet again, poor, poor Satin. Doomed yet again, but lurking still, waiting. Satin’s time would come–the Angles had come and told Satin it was so.
This.Is.Awesome.
Satan, Satan bo batan
Banana fanna fo fatan
Fee fie mo matan, Satan
Diablo motors had a hell of a sale, downtown yesterday,
Word got around, no money down, take years and years to pay.
When I got there the lot was bare, but the salesman said hold on.
For a little cash I got a two-tone Nash, out behind the barnFor a buck or two, I got an S-C-2, out behind the barn.
Steve-Oh! Good to see you again! How are you? Staying well and out of the hospital, I hope.
Absolutely! Just busy surviving winter. I have been lurking lately, but I’m still checking in every so often.
Ditto on the good to see you!
🙂
Hiya Steve-Oh!!! Stick around, I’ll be there’s some coffee slices leftover.
Someone more learned in these things needs to construct a Saturn-Satan fusion story.
I believe it’s been done before, but it was a Plymouth named “Christine” not a Saturn named “Craig.”
How happy it makes me to be able to say, CJ, Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Helsinki!
One year just before Thanksgiving our small-town newspaper reported that “Satan” will be arriving on a certain date and to go visit him at the local mall. I understand random people posting on CL that don’t proofread, but seriously, a newspaper??