Lyle sends this:
Yorkshire Cambria Quarts – $180
Yorkshire Cambria Quarts. 56″x23″ $180. ###-###-####
Now, we COULD make fun of the fact that that’s a LOT more than two pints worth of quarts.
But instead, I’ll just give you this:
[audio:http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/tetrisb.mp3]
Want a Not.A.Lion t-shirt AND a Llama-nun's Prayer mug? How about a Cat Math mousepad? Of course you do!
All are now available as t-shirts and other things! (The llamanun mugs contain the YSaC group prayer on the back.)
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It’s the 21st century; shouldn’t we be measuring our countertops in liters by now?
Cubits are still good enough for some!
*meaningful sniff*
But go on and be all fancy, city people.
How much for that hydraulic lift thing? Now that looks useful.
We should be measuring in rods. Wait, how many hogsheads to a rod again?
Wait until Rod wakes up and just ask him.
I measure my counter tops in cubic knives per fortnight.
For those who don’t remember the conversion:
knife = 17.7 cm
knife³ = 5.55 L
So, by those calculations then, knife((butter/jam)+knife³) = spoon?
(I was never very good at knifey spooney.)
I’m good at spooning.
What?
But how are you at forking?
I use to be a decent fork, but that was back in my salad days.
Just wait till they start doing CatMath with knives.
Well, now I know what song is going to be stuck in my head all day. Sonofa…
I occasionally hum that song for no apparent reason when I am out somewhere with Mila. It annoys her, which only encourages me.
That song will always be the Russian Alphabet Song, as I learned it in Russian Language class. The second semester, I believe, is when a friend of mine found out the Cyrillic sequence fit the song exactly. 8)
Avatar adore, Amadei!
*Edit – Aaaaaand, my brain is still foggy from the sickies. Mistyped my email and now I’m a quilt square. Oh well, at least I’m cozy under this quilt. *sniffle*
Aw, thank you, La.Kitta! Comes from here: http://www.juicylucydesigns.com/
I have a sudden burning urge to play Tetris.
Forget it. They play it rough in Yorkshire. Want a straight piece? You gotta have a huge plate of the hottest curry in town, then down six pints, wait half an hour, and then they’ll give you a straight piece, which you’ll have to drop blindfolded and spun from the back of a llama. (Nobody we know.)
Sounds a little bit like West Hertford rules, except they use a herd of miniature goats instead of a llama and there’s an optional bonus for playing naked.
The miniature goats certainly make it more difficult, but I imagine being naked would mitigate things somewhat, as long as they didn’t rough up the playing surface. Don’t they also require you, after the curry and pints, to play a full game of Mornington Crescent before you’re allowed on the goats?
You have to play three rounds of Calvinball before you get on the goats. Mornington Crescent is played to determine order of play.
Nobody plays Queen’s Rules Tetris anymore. Troglodytes.
It takes too long! I have to draft an invitation to each piece and send a messenger with the summons. Then, once the piece finally arrives, I have to wait for it to be announced onto the playing field. And even when I do get it on the field it pontificates about how beautiful I am (which is awkward) and how honored it feels about joining the game for a good 30 minutes.
Granted it’s fun when I have the piece killed and stack the body with the others, but having to wait so long to do it is just too much.
I haven’t tried playing with troglodytes. Is it hard to bend them into the different shapes?
It’s much easier if you blend them first and use an ice cube tray.
We just went the quick route and hog tied them into whatever shapes we needed. It was kind of kludgy and sometimes the ropes would snap, but we could reshape them later if we wanted to add in some of those funky pieces from later variants, like the Y or C pieces.
Damn you Y piece! *Shakes fist*
Is this before or after the West Worcestershire welly-whanging?
Before the welly-whanging; after the stoat toss.
So, then when are you supposed to use the cricket bat and marmalade?
When the ref calls for a plate of Welsh rarebit.
Unless you’re using Aussie rules, then the ref calls for a plate of ʇıqqɐɹ ɐɹɹǝquɐɔ
Of course, Aussie rules are seldom used internationally as the importation of dingoes is costly and often illegal.
And the kidneys are too oft fetid.
Damn it SJ, that’s what I was gonna say!
*looks around*
WHERE THE HELL IS MY STRAIGHT PIECE!
In the closet.
With the square.
By Professor Plum.
*Highfives SJ*
If we’re talking about straight pieces and squares….then I would say it was probably by Professor Plumb.
It’s never Mr. Green.*
*Interestingly, both in the movie and in every clue game I’ve ever played it’s never been Mr. Green. And, as my favorite color is green, I’ve always played Mr. Green (given the choice).
Contrarily, whenever we play, it seems to always be Mr. Green with the knife. It’s the location that we actually have to figure out. Sneaky bugger likes to move around.
Ahh, the Clue movie. One of the finest pieces of ensemble comedic cinema to come out of the 80s.
(And no, I’m not kidding.)
I love the movie and my wife can’t figure out why.
Because it’s AWESOME! What’s to figure out?
Murder by Death ranks right up there with the Clue movie.
Milo Perrier: What do you make of all of this, Wang?
Sidney Wang: Is confusing.
Lionel Twain: [from moose head] IT! IT is confusing! Say your goddamn pronouns!
I love Murder by Death! Haven’t seen that in years.
Taco, most people refer to their straight piece as “husband” or “wife.” Or, in your case, as TacoMa’am.
Wait, I’m confused. Are these generic quarts from some guy who lives in Yorkshire, Cambria, or are they more specific Yorkshire Quarts from Cambria, or an even more specific subset of Yorkshire Cambria Quarts from Yorkshire, Cambria? I mean, the value proposition changes depending on the specific type of quarts, here. If I’m going to pay that much for 56×23″ quarts, they had better be the good ones. And no giving me two pints equivalent either. I want whole quarts.
Well, if they are Imperial quarts, then they will be 40 ounces each; amethyst they are minions of Palpatine, in which case they will be Carnelian Clones, and 1,454,746 carats each.
(OT) Who’s Lyle? ~.^
That’s the name of whomever submitted the original ad to the Ostrimu & Llama-Nun.(BBUT)
I know it’s the name of the submitter but… *stares hard at the name LYle then checks to make sure her woman-bits are actually still present*
:lightbulb feebly flickers to life:
Ah. Can I blame the cough syrup I took last night? ‘Cause I’m going to.
Don’t be so uppity, Lyle.
*A new nickname is born.
And thus, the parents shall be once again baffled when overhearing our conversations.
Start calling him SexyFingers if you really want to confuse them.
Been a while since I’ve been SexyFingers. I think it’s time to pull that out again.
*Looks at what he typed*
I’ll be in my bunk.
And thus, in one message, Taco simultaneously resurrects the nickname “SexyFingers” and earns the new nom de plume, “Disturbing Detour.” DD for short. Which also happens to be his bra size, curiously enough.
At least, that’s what the contents of his laundry tells me.
I believe Disturbing Detour is also the name of IF’s cross-dressing Men At Work tribute band. I think Tranny Jesus plays the electric fiddle.
Disturbing Detour’s current hit is “I am a man down under.”
Is there a literal video for that?
Do we need one? I really don’t want to see a man’s down under.
Depends on the man; I can think of a few I wouldn’t mind seeing down under.
Lyle, son of Wimbley, son of The Fabulous Dangling Dale. Every once in a while, at some completely random point, Lyle will show up here, do his impersonation of Gene Gene the Dancing Machine, and leave. We don’t know who he is, what he wants with us, or why he always leaves behind a single pair of orange and brown tweed checked pants.
Lyle? Love it! 8)
I can connect Lyle to Willie, football, and bbq with my eyes closed.
Julia sure didn’t.
Lyle went to a football game, got hungry, and decided to barbecue his …
Look, there’s my corner!
Does that count as a touchdown?
It not a touchdown — it’s a GOOOOAAAAAAL.
I may have been half watching too much English Futbol,
*waits patiently for Artsy to finish her sentence*
I can’t stand it anymore! Since that sentence fragment showed up,
I know! It’s like when you’ve got a chee-hooa-hooa,
I’d rather have a quart of Yorkshire Pudding.
Woke up to everything covered in this white stuff. I believe you northerners call it “snow”.
Reading your comment linearly as one tends to do, my expectations as the second sentence played out changed drastically once I got to the noun at the end, as before I reached that point my brain immediately started to wonder what it would be like if everything was suddenly covered in Yorkshire pudding. I must admit to being a little disappointed to find that you weren’t about to explain it.
I have a bad habit of tossing out totally unrelated random thoughts. It’s even worse when I do it mid conversation with someone.
My wife does that too. We’ll be talking about something, there will be a brief pause, and then she’ll continue a thought from some previous discussion midstream without any context whatsoever. Conversationally, it’s like Wile E. Coyote smacking into the painted mountain pass the Road Runner just successfully ran through.
I know several women who do that too.
I’m looking in your direction here, Lyle.
It’s a trait I got from Lyle Sr. She is truly the master of the randomly continued thought.
Mr. Artsy does that. The previous conversation may have started hours ago and then it gets picked up again.
Pretty much everyone on both sides of my family does that. It makes family gatherings more exciting.
I do that, but only when someone goes and changes the gosh-darned subject when I’ve clearly been waiting several minutes for a chance to voice my opinion.
My brother does that. It’s particularly prominent during group conversations, when the rest of us will be off on topic B, and then Brother comes through with a comment or question about topic G (because his brain went A→C→Q→F→D→G, all internally). He also occasionally forgets that we don’t know the antecedents of his pronouns, so it causes some confusion 🙂
Aaaaaand seconded to all the above. Family gatherings of nine people generally have three conversations and five stories (at least two being told by mom) all going on at the same time. Plus, said stories NEVER progress in a linear fashion.
Covered in Yorkshire pudding sounds like a delicious way to start the weekend.
Indeed. In fact, I’m seriously considering making another pot roast this weekend just so I have an excuse to make Yorkshire pudding. It’s been ages since I had it, and now I have a huge craving for it.
Covered in Yorkshire pudding is IF’s Radiohead/ Pink Floyd tribute band.
Ribisi…..*drool*….
😉
I was disappointed when I learned what a Yorkshire pudding truly was. I had up until that point somehow confused it with creme brulee.
It isn’t sweet, but it is delish, especially with beef and gravy.
I prefer Tapioca pudding.
Also, chocolate pudding, especially in pie.
Apparently Cambria Yorkshire™ is trademarked. Huh. Fancy-schmantzy.
After the quarts vs. quartz has already been pointed out, I got nothin’ more.
Sarajean’s Tetris was my eyeworm observation.
OT-Awwww I missed Artsy’s birthday yesterday. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!
Stilldealing with flu, ice on roads, oh and the “dusting” of snow we were expecting is at 4″ and still falling.
How high’s the snow fallin’ Mama?
4″ high and fallin’
While I realize I am in the company of masters *bows reverently to the gods and goddesses of YSAC parodies* and am unworthy, I humbly submit my very first attempt at a song parody above.
Two whole lines.
I am exhausted.
P. S. CJ, please feel better quicker.
Compared to what some people got, 4″ is just a dusting!
Keep feeling better, CJ.
4″ is barely worth my time unless he has other talents.
I’ll be in my corner.
Talents like ventriloquism? Taxidermy? Plumbing?
What talents are appealing enough to overcome the aforementioned shortcomings?
Prestidigitation, perhaps.
Prestidigiarylocomotion is the key!
Illusions? I would think that kelli would see right through that…
Prestidigitation requires excellent manual dexterity. I say it counts as a talent.
Good oratory skills are also a plus.
Thank you CJ. Now drink this tea and go back to bed.
What the ‘ell?
It froze over.
‘bandon all ‘ope, alla yoose guys ‘oo enter ‘ere.
This made more sense in regards to context in my head.
I never give hydraulic lifts:
I only send countertops of quarts
And you can tell what that imports:
You’ll break down…
Boy, you’re gonna carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time
Boy, you’re gonna carry that weight
Carry that weight a long time
I thought they were from Liverpool—not Yorkshire.
Aw, same thing. An Englishman is an Englishman, and they all know each other anyway.
Wait, no, that stereotypes goes with a different group.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSBIAGCulDw
[url= “http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSBIAGCulDw”
]The sound bite brought back memories…[/url]
How the heck is Laverne going to sew that onto her sweater?
She’s had some work done. She’ll probably need the forklift as well.
I’ll be requiring video of that…
That might be a hard on to find.
Can I have 40 quarts to mend the counter top?
I can pay you back on Monday.
I’m expecting a postal order from Craig List.
Love, Lyle.
Adore!
Searching around the free section of Craigslist today for furniture has made me send not a few submissions in to the dynamic duo (bees be with them). Now I’ve got side tracked and am just looking for sucking.
*Sigh* I’m never going to get around to finding a new set of French Prudential furniture.
That’s because ur doin it rong, it’s Frensh Perventional, donchaknow!
No, no, it’s french prestidigitational, as per earlier comments.
You’re not supposed to be old enough to know about that sort of thing, young man! 8)
Yeah, I know. Most of us learned about those things rather young … often through the source known as “someone’s older brother/sister.”
And in my case, “someone’s older brother/sister” means “dad’s poorly hidden stash of Playboys.”
I also know about Otterman Legerdemain.
You want Frensh Prevenshional furniture for FREE?!?!?!
And new to boot??
Where’s your sense of entitlement??
I could not for the life of me figure out what “quarts” was supposed to be. Then I put on my watch and felt incredibly stupid.
Dipstick!
🙂
Hammy, are you calling me one or offering yours?
That’s my husband’s favorite commercial: ” Think with your DIPSTICK!”
Yes
Yes
I guess you realized now that it’s Sparkese for “quarks.” As in, the stuff they make quarkboards out of.
Ohhhh….that kind of quark. The kind for wine bottles.
“Quaaaaaaark.”
“Honestly, I have no idea where all this contraband came from, Constable.”
[corey] Quark is also cheese. [/corey]
[Lunch OT]
Lunch today from Subway:
Footlong Flatbread Sweet Onion Teriyaki (Yay I pretended to eat healthy for lunch!) with Southwestern chipotle sauce, Jalapeños, banana peppers, bell peppers, onion, lettuce, spinach, and black pepper.
For those who want to have a tasty salad-in-a-sandwich, I recommend that combination. As somebody who generally hates veggies on my sandwich, I found this awesomely delicious (enough that I’m recommending it on YSAC). The chipotle sauce really brought it up to the “wow, good sandwich!” level. I don’t usually bother recomending stuff at chain joints, as what you can get locally is generally better, but this made a heck of an impression on me. I may never eat their meatball sub again.
[/OT]
Just because it hasn’t yet been said….
…Cambria quarts YOU!
In Soviet Yorkshire, blamange eats you!
Is that anything like crystal beets?
Blancmange: When you want to appear high class when serving Jell-O. Also a fun 80s synthpop band.
Hmm, my spell checker says both of those are correct words, potentially through a misplaced “add word to dictionary” click from me.
Ooh..I’m sorry…that just looks disgusting. And just where would the Jell-O go?
Looks a lot like flan. I never saw the appeal.
I personally love flan, but Blancmange is a taste I never acquired.
I’ve never tried flan since I am not overly fond of caramel or jiggly things.
Blancmange is basically gelatin, sugar and milk or cream, plus some sort of dairy-friendly flavouring. So … creamy Jell-O, really. I can eat it, but I’m not a fan. The consistency is usually kind of mushy, halfway between Jell-O and mousse, which is the part that makes me kind of gaggy.
You’re No Fun Anymore, Nov. ’69:
Blancmanges Playing Tennis
Taco and MF, now you’re you’re just taunting me <3
Note relevant to yesterday’s ad:
After I got off the computer, my mom came home with delicious pie. This pie was in the future yesterday. Now it is in the past.
Was future pie every bit as wondrous as they have said it will be?
Better.
It had pudding in it.
*wonders if penguin ever noticed the box today*
Penguin, Punchity Punch Punch! (pew! pew pew!)
G’Night, Cambria!
I saw and then got quickly sidetracked by the thought of Yorkshire Pudding. I think I may have to cook a roast with some for Sunday’s dinner.
Thanks for the punch. Ouch.
After reading through the comments, I now want to eat pudding while watching Clue and then play Tetris.
*In me best Irish accent*
“Quarts?”
“The ‘L’ you say?!?”
I wanted to say something about cupz, gallenz and Yorkshire Terrierz, but I’m a bit scrambled. Somewhat, but not entirely unlike my eggz.
I’ll take 3 quarts of youkies, please!
I think you can get those in teacupz.
I thoroughly enjoyed all of the old comments. They’re always as good as the “fresh” ones.
Lizzi, One doesn’t mean to be fresh, he’s just very energetic. 8)
Ghostie, a weekend in the box might be very restful after all the home improvements you’ve been up to! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Ghost of Puddings Past!