YSaC, Vol. 796: Free TV! TV has been oppressed for too long!
1.00 a bag what ever u can get in it! – $1
Stick as much as u can get in a bag for 1.00 if it don’t fit we will
make it fit! 10 am to 1pm thurs aug 19th fri aug 20 10am to 1pm . And
sat aug 21 9am to 2pm. Free tv [address]
Wow! As much as I can fit in a bag. As much WHAT, I’m not sure, but it as MUCH as I can fit in a bag. And a TV. Say, I wonder where they GOT the TV?
Toshiba 32″ TV for Prop 215 Meds
I have a 32″ Toshiba TV that I’m willing to trade for some prop 215 meds.
Well, that makes sense. OK, so now I just need a bag.
UNIQUE HANDCRAFTED LADIES SHOULDER BAG! – $85
OFFERING A ONE OF A KIND, HANDCRAFTED LADIES SHOULDER BAG. MADE FROM 100% RECYCLED MATERIALS, THIS BAG HAS IT ALL! IT MEASURES 20″W X 24″LONG X 12″ OPENING AT TOP. THE LEATHER SHOULDER BELT ADDS 12″ IN LENGTH. MADE FROM A WELL WORN PAIR OF DENIM JEANS, ( CLEANED & SANITIZED}, THE BAG IS TRIMMED IN VARIOUS STRIPS OF DECORATIVE FABRIC, OLD BRASS RINGS & PINS, BUTTONS, BEADS, FRINGE, LEATHER BELTS, ETC. DESIGNED AND HANDCRAFTED BY A LOCAL ARTIST. THIS BAG IS FULLY FUNCTIONAL, AND A SURE EYE CATCHER! OWN A ONE OF A KIND TODAY!
Great! But what does it mean by “eye catcher?” Let me just look a little closer and…OW! MY EYE! This hurts! I sure wish I hadn’t traded my “medication” for that TV.
Thanks for the posts, David, Wendy, and Tonya!
Christmas Shopping for Mr Winkey: Done.
Does Mr Winkey really need *another* rag bag?
**winks at Bombdude and Taco**
You know I’m always on the lookout for some hot accessories for my t-shirts.
1) That’s hideous.
2) Do you think they will accept trash bags? Empty of course.
Oh and 3) Yes, that IS an eye-catcher….and an eye-killer too.
Who needs a TV if you have that eye catching bag – especially if you are on prop 215 meds?
I keep thinking that “eye catcher” means exactly what it says.
“Oops, your eye is falling out! Let me go get the eye catcher bag!”
Enucleation.
That is all.
I’m better off not doing a Google image search on that, right?
Andie, I am going to defenestrate you for that! (The Snark Lounge is on the main floor, right?)
And SJ, let’s just say that the google image search for “enucleate” is more frightening than the image results for “optho-burr”, which is the type of drill used on MrEB’s eyeball. Juuuuuust saying.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
I had a nightmare the other night involving the Optho-Burr, a green prom dress, and Vector’s Piranha Gun from Despicable Me.
Must’a been a Helluva dress!!
As a biologist, I associate that term w/ removal of the nucleus from a cell, which I don’t find squicky at all. But just to be sure I was remembering the term correctly, I went and did a Google image search.
Oh, so disturbing. But I still think the concept of an eye-drill is worse. I am NOT going to Google it.
You’re right, AR. The biologist’s definition of enucleation has a much lower squick factor than the nurse’s. Sorry you googled it. Way to avoid the Optho-Burr, tho. [[**shiver**]]
This brings back memories of when I wrapped a gift for my sister in a motion discomfort bag I stole from the plane. Good times.
I think now Astro’s got his sister’s wrapping paper all figured out for her next birthday prezzie. Good times, indeed.
One year, I wrapped my brother’s Christmas present in a Victoria’s Secret gift bag. (I think he was 15 or 16 or something…) There was even undies in the bag! Simpson’s boxers from WallyMart, but still :-p
Awesome EB.
😉
My dad got my mom a nightgown one year, wrapped it around a brick, and put it in a shoe box. After Christmas she put the brick back where he got it, the back steps leading from the garage to the back yard.
One year, when I was…. in middle school, I think, I got my mom a little glass box thingy for Christmas. Then I wrapped it in a box with wrapping paper. Then I wrapped that box in a box, with wrapping paper. Then I wrapped that box in ANOTHER box, with wrapping paper. And so on… I think the biggest box was about 2, 2.5 feet across, and that was probably the most useless use of wrapping paper on the planet :-p
We once gave my mother a record (this was about 1981) in a 2’x2′ box. That was also rather a waste of wrapping paper.
[gift ot] Long ago, my mother did not care for my brother’s girlfriend whom he had impregnated. That Christmas, she gave him a case of condoms. Very subtle, Mom. [/gift ot]
His daughter is beautiful and we adore her. The girlfriend did time after her meth lab blew up.
** sniff, sniff **
What a lovely, timeless Christmas story, kelli. I just know we are going to see that on Lifetime sometime soon. I wonder if we can get Valerie Bertinelli to play your brother’s babymomma.
I was thinking Tracy Gold for the babymomma, but she may be a bit too old. Britney Spears may be a good fit.
**snorts**
As of this point, I ain’t gettin’ my sister a darned thing.
Ah, wouldn’t the hard bit being in britt’ny not living out the script before principal shooting was finished?
There is actually someone who collects those, used to know him. Proof: http://www.airsicknessbags.com/
Penis.
Just getting it out of the way early today.
I like it in the morning too…
What?
Hammy, don’t lie. You like it any time.
Yeah, I have to be going.
Well, I did not disqualify other times…
🙂
As a male member of the species, isn’t “other times” pretty much all the time?
Unless yours is detachable.
Like a strap-on? *squick*
Detachable?
*King Missile reference*
Way cool, Lola, like clothespin jeebus.
Christina,
About that song: there’s a line in it where he says he went “to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.”
One day (before I moved here) I walked past there and wondered … “Why is that familiar? Was I here before and don’t remember?” Then it came to me. People who’ve never been to NYC or who are metro-phobic in general don’t get it, but little things like that help balance out some some of the craptastic parts of living here.*
*Yeah, I’m easily swayed. Sometimes.
Stop talking about Hammy’s male member, sj!
Hey, these things tend to pop up from time to time.
There are days that I miss the city in a bad way, but then there are days where I realize that what I actually miss is living close enough to hop a bus down there for the weekend. Every time I listen to Lou Reed/VU I get a little nostalgic.
Christina, from where your post ended up in the thread, it looks like you’re bemoaning leaving city due to the lack of penises. Buck up, girlfriend, penises are everywhere!
[humming “love is all around you” but with “penises are”…]
Only the detachable ones, Andie 🙂 I have a lovely husband with the attached variety.
Actually, procuring the detachable variety here in Texas is…interesting. It’s a felony to have more than eight, I believe. Our local “adult” store keeps them in a curtained off room labeled “novelties” and all packages have a sticker claiming that they are “therapuetic aids for sexual dysfunction”. I wish I was joking.
*blink* Wow…
Thanks, Andie. Not only does my mind occasionally worry about just how many pigeons, rats, cockroaches, etc., there are around me at any given moment in NYC, now I’m thinking about how many male human penises there are, too.
*hides*
I like men, but four million, give or take, of all ages, is kind of overwhelming.
Well if it makes you feel any better, I had actually looked up the lyrics to “Love Is All Around You”, changed all the “loves” to penises (penii?) and changed a few more words, but then decided it would be beneath me (rimshot) to post it in such august company. So I am very sorry for squicking you out, and glad I chose discretion in this instance.
No need to apologize – I was being a bit facetious! 8) Post away. I’m still a little boggled by four. million. penises, that’s all (not even going to think about the, er, larger metro area).
I hear ya’, girlfriend. That’s a lot of junk.
Still think I will desist from posting the lyrics, tho. They weren’t funny enough to justify the squick factor. Don’t want my first contact with the Llamanun (bees be upon her) to be her chasing me out of the Snark Lounge with a broom.
Might still be in the bag…
Prop 215 meds- Didn’t they just vote on that in California?
Not until November. 8)
I must live in another virtual plane — I had to look “Prop 215 meds” up.
Thanks again to Uncle Google.
Oh, what is it?
I’d Google it myself, but I don’t think Parental Controls would be too happy about it.
It’s medical marijuana. I have not read Proposition 215, so I can’ t claim to be an expert, but I’m fairly comfortable postulating that advertising on CL to trade a tee-vee for “prop 215 meds” is not contemplated in the legislation.
Ah, that explains it. I don’t read that sort of stuff.
The potheads on my bus were shocked to find out that, even as liberal as I am (politically. I’m somewhere between Nader and Gandhi on the compass.), I am vehemently opposed to the legalization of any kind of drugs, including pot.
420, 215…this is starting to take the form of catmath!
I wasn’t familiar with prop 215, but it took me no time at all to guess correctly what substance is being referred to here.
I am not pro-pot. I take a very dim view of recreational drugs, and if I like people who use them, I wish they wouldn’t. I have a special hatred of the “I hate druggies and make insulting cracks about them all the time, but I spend half my waking hours stoned and that’s okay because pot isn’t a real drug” people. And I hate people acting like pot is The Amazing Wonder Drug, good for everything and devoid of side-effects (no it isn’t, on both counts).
But if it’s the only damn thing that works for some ailment or other, then it should be available. And there are times, as I endure a painful, untreatable disease (fibro, for the curious) that makes me want to die on a regular basis, when I think I should just go grab the nearest hippie (where I live, easily done) and get hooked up. Because not hurting would rock.
[garage sale corey] Most garage/yard sale attendees begin at the crack of dawn – usually by 5 or 6 in the morning you can expect bargain hunters to begin sorting through your trash er, items for sale. So just the idea that they want to begin at 10 am and 9 am those two days demonstrates they truly have no idea what they are getting into. [/garage sale corey]
You seem to know an awful lot about garage sales….
I held one once. Many moons ago. And after lugging our giant 25″ inch TV (before there were flat panel screens) in and out of our house twice, especially after having a couple of people RING MY DOORBELL at 5: 30 am asking when I would be ready to begin selling – immediately after tripping over the sign in our front yard that stated the times it would be held – I vowed never again.
Now I simply drive to and from Goodwill for all my used goods disposal/purchase needs.
I’m not a very nice person in the morning. Best case scenario involves insults and profanity. And if they woke Tron, the verbal abuse would most likely be followed by being chased down the street by a knife wielding maniac.
So yeah, better for everyone if Taco doesn’t have a yard sale.
This is why my City requires registration of GS.
The location goes on the GIS City map, but, the times are enforced, too–anyone showing up early can be charged with criminal tresspass for failing to leave.
You do not have to register, you can opt for “poster board sign stapled to power & sign poles” advertizing. However, such signs are subject to removal, and the people at the address may get billed for “vandalism clean up.” Any traffic complaints are delat with strictly, too. Noise and commotion rules are more strictly enforced as well.
Much simpler for all to register.
What city do you live in Cappy? Beijing? Sounds like the HOA Nazis on steroids.
I’ve heard of local towns with similar registration procedures, it’s partially to discourage permanent yard sales as well.
We have one of those permanent yard sales about half mile down the street… It does get pretty annoying -_-
Actually it has worked out well. The number of police calls for poltroons door-knocking at 0445-0530 has decreased immensely ever since the registration process was initiated.
Also, the clean up costs for sign and power poles has also gone down.
The number of ploice calls for folks parked down the block and attempting to buy items from the wrong garage has come way down, too.
Not complicated, either, you just go to the City website and fill the form in.
God, I love the word “poltroons”.
Quite. Prefixes well with either “ponced” or “poncing” too.
(Especially apt as “poncing” involves sprinkling with a porous bag, for today’s topic)
Is that where the term “pontooning” came from?
A garage sale that I held would probably start at around 11am and be done whenever I got bored. I don’t think the life of a garage sale holder is for me.
Oh, the missed opportunities to buy slightly used, but cleaned and sanitized TacoThongs turned into fully functional bags for holding marbles and Prop 215 meds…
MWAH! I see a punchity punch in your future J-Dog.
!elebenty1!1! adores
I love going to yard sales but I rarely ever have them myself. I’d rather poke through someone else’s stuff than sit in a lawn chair on my lawn and listen to people snicker over my discards.
I hate the making change part—you give me a $50 bill for a Matchbox car that is marked for a quarter?? And the HAGGLING!!! Stop with the haggling people! How cheap do you want those size 6 Frye boots that are marked a dollar?
I would not have been good in the Agora in 354 b.c.e.
Oooh I have one.
Me: Hi, I’d like to buy this Hot Wheels car.
Sparky: Ok, that will be a quarter.
Me: Ok. Do you accept debit?
No, but you’d be great on the fields of Marathon!
There are days I feel like I’ve been at Thermopylae.
I don’t care if they snicker over my discards, what makes me snicker is the stuff that I am convinced is absolute **** and which is quickly and avidly snapped up. Definitely no accounting for taste. My favorite garage sale moment (I haven’t had one – a garage sale, that is – since adulthood, but my parents had several, which I was “encouraged” to “help” with) was about 20 years ago and featured a boy of about 8 or so who was FASCINATED by my parents’ 8-track player. He kept staring and poking at it, so finally my father went over and said “So, what do you think?” and the boy said, “It’s great. What is it?” He had absolutely no idea.
Lola, for some reason, picturing this:
http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:vdQ6fzMLAue3RM:http://tcal.net/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/2001.jpg&t=1
I just see him poking and prodding at it, and if it came alive and made noise, he’d go scampering back with wild shrieks and grunts.
Heh, Meredith, the 8-track player was only a few years younger than that film …
Actually, given the music that would have been played on it (my parents were not hip since about 1961, so it had stuff like “101 Strings”), I just imagine him stepping back a bit and scrunching his face in distaste … but he’d still be fascinated by the cartridges.
I still feel like a kid most of the time, and am very surprised when someone in their late thirties or forties speaks to me like a peer, or ::heavens:: shows romantic interest.
What reminds me that I am of the age to someday have someone gasp? There’s an 8 track floating around my parents house with my voice on it. My very young voice, but still. I wasn’t just old enough to listen to them…my parents had an 8 track RECORDER.
Until my parents moved into the house they are in now, about ten years ago, they still had one of those massive stereo consoles that look like a low bench, complete with record player and eight track player. And they used it.
My parents had an eighty-three Dodge van that came with a factory issue 8track player. Then again, I had a ’97 ford with a tape deck.
My parents had a garage sale once where someone bought a box of nails out of my Dad’s hand. (He was nailing up the “garage sale” sign.)
I remember when I was little my father would play 8 track recordings of radio shows like The Shadow (Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of men? The Shadow Knows), My Little Marjie, Amos and Andy, and Superman.
The one garage sale I had didn’t have any of these problems. The first day, we put up signs around the neighborhood about an hour before we were ready to start, so we didn’t get people showing up at 5 am. The second day, I think a few people showed up early but they didn’t ring the doorbell (although at that house the doorbell was a bit tricky, so maybe they did show up but we didn’t know). As for the haggling or the lack of change…I don’t know why we didn’t have any trouble with that. I seem to remember people trying both. I think someone tried to buy my cat or my roommate’s cat or something…but it might have been a joke. They weren’t terribly adamant, at least.
That sounds like a good plan. If I did put an ad in CL about the sale, I’d add the caveat, “Early birds will be tasered.”
Really? I’d add: “Early birds will be fed to the CHS Drumline.”
Also:
“Beware of Frog and Rare San Franciscan Walrus”
I know we’ve talked about “fully functional” before, but….when is a bag not functional?
And don’t say “when there’s a hole in it,” that’s a cop-out, I’ve used bags with holes in them before.
Just don’t let the catulator out of the bag.
If you sewed the top shut it would be non-functional.
Then it would be an “art piece”.
Either way, sewn shut or left open, it’s still a piece of crap!
/Regretsy-inspired rant (because it really does look like they made it with their feet)
You don’t know how hard I’ve worked to bring back the ancient art of foot-crafting!!!
Bless your heart, so this is your work?
Try harder.
When the bag has been sliced into little strips of cloth.
When the hole in the bag is the size of the entire bottom of the bag.
When the bag is ajar.
When the bag is a jar? Then it’s a jar.
No, Taco said it was “ajar”. Different meaning than “a jar”.
Are you his anti-muse NMN? Hehe
The door is a jar. The door is a jar.
And the cake is a lie.
No, it was just left out in the rain.
I can’t bake a cake without someone telling me it’s a lie.
The cake is a lie and pie is truth. Convert to pie!
To heck, I say, with you cake and pie people. It’s cobbler or it’s nuthin’.
The cake is not a lie! I’m making a cake later this week, I promise!
And pi just isn’t very filling…
Silence, pastry infidels! The true path to happiness and enlightenment lies in the Way of the Krispy Kreme Doughnut!
That would probably also be an accurate way to address this group.
I’m pale and I like pie!!!!
So you’re a pasty lover of pastry? 🙂
Pan au chocolat
I’m not a lover. I’m an infidel. And I like it that way.
I prefer “godless heathen” to “infidel” but that’s just me.
Is “a jar” and “ajar” like “famous” and “imfamous”?
I like how you think sarajean.
“And pi just isn’t very filling…”
True, but it just keeps going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going…
Is the pie cheesy on the outside? And then it’s got a completely different layer, and then underneath that is the exact same thing as first.
Uh oh, someone go catch Yancy before he(?) gets sucked into the Vortex of Infinity. I’d do it, but I misplaced my diamond tether.
True Story:
We were coming back from [Local Restaurant] to head to band practice, and the conversation turns to cake. My friend says, “The cake is a lie.” I am able to tell him it’s not, as on Tuesday they give us baked goods, and there was a table in front of us with a big chocolate cake on it.
The cake was, for once, not a lie.
I have a large bucket filled with fabric scraps saved from other projects that are just big enough that I don’t want to throw them out. That last ad looks like someone wiped their ass with glue and sat in my scrap bucket.
SJ, you just created a new art form.
I shall call it … Assbaggery!
I think the last bag looks like they let their kids “store” their gum inside it, forgot about that, thought it’d make a great place to keep usable scraps of material and then one day looked inside, thought “WTF?”, turned it inside out, added a few more bits of flotsam and voila…a natural for CL! Too bad they don’t have an Etsy store. I think Helen Killer would have a field day with this.
I think this is more accurately described as jetsam.
*doing the corey dance*
[nautical corey] Flotsam describes goods that are floating on the water without having been thrown in deliberately, often after a shipwreck; while Jetsam has been voluntarily cast into the sea (jettisoned) by the crew of a ship, usually in order to lighten it in an emergency. [/nautical corey]
The jar/cake/puke purse decorations were apparently positioned voluntarily.
“Flotsam” is also any debris released from a vessel that floats; “jetsam” is such bdebris which sinks.
If one bags galley scraps and weights the bag to sink, it is jetsam. If the bag opens affter jettisoning, and some contents then float to the surface, that jetsam becomes flotsam.
While in the littoral, flotsam is also the debris on the leading edge of the surf line; jetsam is debris ins the saturated and super-saturated beach zones. Floating crude oil washed ashore is flotsam; tar balls from decomposed floating crude are jetsam.
Isn’t that how you find out if it’s a witch or not? If it floats — witch! If it sinks — not a witch!
Yeah, Capn…that’s what I was thinking about…the icky crap that winds up along shorelines…flotsam…
Little tiny rocks?
Yes, Mudsy, but the shortcut is to see if she weighs the same as a duck.
A duck? Aflac? or Affleck?
I’m just not up on my rules for Salem witchery.
*sigh*
Those came out of your WHERE?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp_l5ntikaU
Oh, good old MP. Thanks Hammy.
I thought tarballs were compressed Linux programs.
Tarballs are compressed Linux :anything: a program, a directory full of poetry writings, etc…
a/k/a Squished Penguin Dingleberries?
Bombdude, is your avatar a chick with two large knockers?
Very close Kelli, it’s actually titled “chick with nice knockers”. and, for the record, I found it very humorous that, in the snark lounge, where lines cower in the corner with the sheep, an avatar needs to be labeled “G rated” to appear 😀
SJ — thanks, that was my last diet coke that is now all over my keyboard. (However, it was the best laugh in a long time — I has this really great visual!!!).
Would the visual be enhanced if you knew it is a repurposed kitty litter bucket with the words Tidy Cat all over it? It’s also a bright, bright yellow.
Now my visual is said bright yellow bucket stuck on someone’s bum, with the random bits of fabric peeking out the edges :-p
I have had to teach myself to put all drinks out of reach when I read YSaC. Coffee and keyboards do not play well together….
Bombdude..it’s a right of passage for all YSaCers.
Yup. You’re not a regular until you’ve coated your monitor down with explosively decompressed beverage at least once.
Aww, man! I guess I’m not a regular, unless choking on a caffeinated beverage that is trying to explosively decompress itself counts.
Just how much coffee does Mr. EB drink…
*Sends self to corner*
Close enough. It’s more about the explosive decompression than it is about actually hitting something.
Hitting something is bonus points.
*Snerk*
Nah, Mr is more of a Mountain Dew and Monster guy….
And,
I thought that was more of a frat-boy mentality?
The innuendo is getting as thin as the line in here.
You said “in you endo”….BWAHAHAH!
Poor line. Somebody has been spewing all over it. As Bianchi would say, the line is a hard on to keep around.
You would think the line would be used to explosive decompression by now. I mean we have been crossing it for a while now.
It’s more of a finely minced former line.
(I actually bought a keyboard protector for my new laptop to prevent…discharges from ruining it.)
I thought that was only necessary for males whilst viewing their favorite “quiet shirt time” media…
*already in the corner*
I think it has the bends.
I’ve never had a spew on the monitor moment, but I’ve had many beverages returned through the nose due to comments here. But I should get points for soy milk through my eyes on the very first day I found this site.
Yeah, OK Bombdude… EW. Brainbleach for everyone.
SJ, I (for one) am glad to hear that you are practicing safe posting. Carry on.
Not so much safe posting as I am tired of constantly picking loose crap out of my crevices with a toothpick.
What?
Pfftt… Thanks SJ, now everything smells like coffee to me…. and will all night. At least I got away from the keyboard in time. Janitorial service guys gotta be wondering why my trashcan always has a lot of “wet” in it…
Try using a T-shirt instead of your trashcan.
I thought most guys used tissues for that…
You know, I think I just realized that there is an untapped marketing strategy for Kleenex…
I think that’s the real reason they make the ones with lotion.
Do I really need a reason to make lo…*
*nevermind*
*ve to a tissue? Really, that’s the only completion I could think of…
Does it count if it is, in fact, not a beverage, but the sauce from a Chicago-style deep dish pepperoni?
EDIT: Darn. This ended up way down here and looks all kinds of out of place.
Didn’t we clear this up the other day? It’s either a bag o’Fu, or it’s Wyclef Jean. And either of those are a great deal at 1$!!!
Wait, or is it as much Wyclef Jean as I can fit in a bag? How big is the bag?
“Uhhh, I can’t get the left shoulder and arm into the bag, so just lop those off and I’ll take the rest.
“10 am to 1 pm thurs aug 19th fri aug 20th 10 am to 1 pm”
Wouldn’t it have been easier to say “10 am to 1 pm this thursday and friday!”?
Oh, and if it’s a garage sale, why are you posting this on CL? Just put up signs around your neighborhood, that’s what everyone else does. It’s just common sense…..
They were trying to use the passive voice.
😉
NMN, it’s CL – don’t assume common sense.
Prop 215? Isn’t that a reference from a book in the Old Testament?
Prop 215:34: And then Yahweh commanded Meds to take his family out for some dessert and told him, “Sticketh as much as u canst get inst a bag for 1.00; if it don’t fitteth I will make it fitteth and go forth! And thenst haveth the key lime pie!:
And Meds said it was good.
As the propmaster of many (one) a highschool play I think I have the answer for you!
*Digs around in the prop room*
Aha! Prop 215 is a slide whistle!
*Weeeeeeeeeoooooooow*
That’s many more propmasters for a play than I have been, Taco.*
*Did that make sense?
*Yes it did, but I had to read it twice, slowly.
Isn’t the Propmaster the Keymaster’s second cousin?
Was Taco in Ghost Busters?
Yeah, I was that guy in the one scene. Wearing those clothes.
Oh my gosh! I’ve always wondered if that was you!
So, what you’re saying is that you were the Carrot Top and Gallagher of the behind the scenes thespian endeavors of Hot Pepper High?
That’s far more innocent than any “prop” I’ve run across. Unless “slide whistle”….hmmmm, let me check Urban Dictionary and I’ll get back to you on this.
Edit: AAAAAHHHH, WHY DID I LOOK THAT UP? EVEN I DON’T NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS!
There are times, like now, that I am profoundly grateful my work computer has blocked the Urban Dictionary.
Ok, now I have to go look it up….but I’m afraid to….oh well,
AHHHH HOW HORRIBLE! THAT’S GOING TO HAUNT ME FOR THE REST OF THIS HOUR!!!!
Until I forget about it.
Well, at least it wasn’t a rusty one…
Do you want to borrow the brain-poking stick?
For some reason, Urban Dictionary is never blocked by Parental Controls. Go figure.
Suddenly drmk sounds like a pr0no.
Astro, don’t be surprised if the Llamanun (bees be upon her) gives you detention or penance after posting that! 8)
The llamanun is more than the sum of her parts.
But Meds’ wife didst look askance at her husband, and declared, “We have no room for this junk in the garage. You do not need another broken fishing rod, even if it has a full reel. Yahweh is making sport of you, and you will do anything for pie.”
…And that’s when he turned her into a pillar of asphalt.
Which is probably even funnier when pronounced in the Canadian way, “ASH fault”
My best friend’s ex-boyfriend used to pronounce it that way. To this day, whenever we have need to use that word, we always pronounce it as ashphalt and laugh hysterically.
Besides being insufferable, I’m positive he wasn’t Canadian.
And I had to go back and reread it because my mind saw it as “asshat”
And Meds fashioned for himself a sign, measuring 4 cubits by 4 cubits, made of the finest mdf. And he attached poles to this sign, and secured those poles with duct tape from the land of Hope Depot, where the Tribe of the Orange Vests reside. And upon this sign he wrote, in permanent marker of the blackest ink: “Yard Sale Saturday 9-3. lots of stuff. no early shoppers”
And Meds planted this sign on the edge of the cul-de-sac, where the road Maplehurst meets Oakleaf Lane. And the people of the land saw the sign, and they came to Meds house, seeking stuff.
But there were some of that land which broke the ordinance of Meds, and approached his house at 15 past 8 am. And Meds answered the doorbell and saw the early shoppers, and lo, he was sorely vexed.
Meds did reproach these Early Ones, saying unto them “Canst thy eyes not readeth the clock’s hands? ‘Tis far to early in the morn to haggle in the verge like common shopkeepers!” And with that Meds did turneth on his sprinklers and flushed the Early Ones from his property.
My parents have a sprinkler system.
*makes note to tell them of this tactic before next sale*
The problem with the sprinkler strategy is that (at least in our case) you need to be up at least elebenty hours before the sale start time to lug all of the useless junk out to the yard.
Now you’ve just doused your cool ass collection of faded bell bottoms too!
That’s what tarps are for.
Your pants will make my butt look cool? Awesome! (What, with one of those novelty pairs of sunglasses or something?) What time does your yardsale start? I want to make sure to show up extra early, so I can get those pants…
SJ, I thought tarps were for bailing out floundering corporations…. Dammit, I’m so confused!!!
EB, they’re the bedazzled’est bell bottoms ya ever did saw!!
OT: no matter what I try, I no can get me avatar working…
Bomb,
Did you read the “How do I change my avatar?” thread in the Forum?
Did you set the rating at “G”?
Did you login at the Forum, or under the Comments? (this can make a difference).
Cap’n;
Yes.
Huh? (might have missed this, it seems familiar, yet I can’t quite recall)
Yes.
When you add a photo to Gravatar, one of the last steps is to rate it, using a G-PG-etc scale. It’s best to go with G, so everyone can see it.
ok, yeah, found it, and the only one not rated “G” is the one I was trying to use. Had defaulted to PG I guess? so I changed it. let’s see if it’s fixed…
It’s a TARP!!
(Holy Hannah, Meredith, that’s a big sign!)
!!!
Oh… Holy Hannah. I got excited there for a second.
Carry on.
Hum… Apparently I’m missing something. But, per the conversation later on the page, the thing I am missing is not my breasts.
mudsy…I expect this to be Monty Python-ed at any moment…
And you were very much correct CJ.
😉
I’m still looking for a table on CL and lately I’ve seen a lot of ads from dealers that offer a free tv. It’s almost worth going to the furniture warehouses just to see what kind of a tv I can get with a $150 table purchase. Likely it will be the one I put on the curb last month.
Wait a minute! That “bag” is nothing more than a pair of shorts with a bunch of crap glued on with a belt for a handle…..maybe I’m just slow? Did anyone else notice that?
Yes. Yes, we have noticed you are slow. But we love you anyway.
Remember, he’s a young adult male – they can be expected to not pay close attention to a purse.
I would have expected women’s shorts to get more attention.
With all that crap stuck to them you can’t really tell that they are shorts anymore.
Plus I don’t think the ad specified that they were women’s jeans.
Looks like a typical bag on the rag to me…
*Ducks*
My wife turned a pair of pants into a bag once, but she had the good taste not to freak out on it with a glue gun and her scraps pile.*
*She made a case for her DS out of a pair of slacks.**
**She’s also made a few T-shirt quilts.
A pair of women’s shorts? Hmm, I might be inclined… except for the price… Gonna have to dicker first…
What?
That purse looks nothing like me!
TMI? 🙂
Not only do they suck at CL, they suck at crafts, too.
I also had to do a double take at the dimensions:
IT MEASURES 20″W X 24″LONG X 12″ OPENING AT TOP.
So 20 inches wide, presumably measured flat, 24 inches long and 12 inches at the waist (again, measured flat). WTF would that fit??? A rather rotund, wasp-waisted person, I guess. and 24″ long would mean half the legs were still there?
So in a pinch, you could dump your obnoxious child in this bag and carry him/her around…. Other than the footyprints in your lipstick nastiness….
Why would I want to put my lipstick in a bag that once held someone’s butt?
Butt it’s been “cleaned & sanitized”! (Which in this instance should be replaced with “cleansed by fire”)
Or lava.*
*I will bring up lava as many times as possible.
Hmph, I don’t believe anything is “sanitized for your protection” unless it has one of those paper strips that says so, like in a hotel.
This thing needs to be sanitized in an autoclave. For about a week and a half.
Because it’s been (CLEANED & SANITIZED).
Duh.
*pushing sarajean out of the way. Move it sista’!*
Watch it, I still have my brain-poking stick!
I hope your stick has been cleaned and sanitized. I wouldn’t want any brain bits getting all over my new fully functional local-artist hancrafted bag.
*smacks you on the head with a slide whistle*
Harrison Ford made your bag??
Do you have Harrison Ford IN your bag?!?
Mmmmm….
Your bag was made in China between 206 B.C. and 220 A.D.?
*snort* That’s the Han Dynasty Hammy!
Not to be confused with the Han Solo Dynasty.
I see, so your bag was made a long time ago in a galaxy far far away?
You wouldn’t think a bag like that would have survived the lava so well.
It’s made of assbestos.
I have nothing original to say this morning. I feel like something that was once treasured, but now is set out on the front lawn for strangers to examine and then choose something else. *puts self out with the trash*
(Just kidding! I feel fine. I think I’ll go for a walk.)
I treasure you, Windy.
Does that mean you want to bury her on some deserted isle?
No, she wants to throw her in a lake to lob scimitars at people.
Andie, that’s so sweet! 8) As long as you don’t bedazzle me, we’ll get along just fine.
I actually have a Bedazzler. Really. A real one. Still in the box. Are you SURE you don’t want me to Bedazzle you? Maybe some nice rhinestones on your wings with some nice metal studs (he-he, I said studs) on the edges?
Uh, no. Thought it over. Thanks anyway. To hard to get airborne with all that jewelry.
It’s a TRAP!!
This kind of thing is my bag, baby.
I think I see what’s going on here. Sparky is a serial killer. A prolific one whose only signature is that he takes a trophy from each of his victims, a common MO that couldn’t be traced to any particular person. Otherwise he varies his kills as much as possible; a stabbing here, a gunshot there, some brutal torture involving pinning the victim’s eyelids open and forcing them to watch a weeklong marathon of The O’Reiley Factor.
But little did he know that the FBI was already onto him, they just didn’t know who he was yet. He didn’t realize it until it was too late, but he left clumps of peanut butter at each of the crime scenes, which effectively became his signature and labeled him The Peanut Butter Butcher. He had to ditch the evidence and quick.
So he posts on Craigslist: Everything must go, a buck a bag, come in, take anything you want (except the cupboards full of peanut butter) and stuff it in a bag for a buck. Two bags? Two bucks. Doesn’t matter what it is, bed sheets, boxes of detergent, cases of Thorazine, his parrot that kept squawking “He murdered gran, help!” at all hours, anything. Buy as many bags as you want and start cramming. And cram they did.
But there were still leftovers when all was said and done. His TV, for one. The TV on which he watched his kills back, the ones he recorded with his LifeCam. The feds could find that TV and examine it, and then they’d find that scene he kept pausing at so often that it burned into the phosphors. The one with the pretty young girl and the even prettier chow chow.
Back on Craigslist it went. And it went.
One last thing. Or many last things, actually: The trophies. Nobody took those, probably because they just looked like random, ordinary bits of scrap fabric and head scalps. He needed to do something to make them more attractive to buyers, organize them in a way that makes them make sense.
Bags. Bags made sense. Bags made out of old jorts. Bags made out of old jorts festooned with bits of his large collection of colourful, often hairy trophies. He didn’t like those jorts anyway. People on the subway always complained because he traveled commando and the jorts had wide legs. At least they got to take that vision with them into the afterlife.
And so he set to sewing up and adorning his many pairs of wide-legged jorts, and then he listed them on Craigslist once again. He had to admit they were fantastic works of art. If he wasn’t in imminent danger of being caught and sentenced to death, he’d have seriously considered keeping them. Nothing would have made him happier than to be able to take his trophies with him wherever he went, cleverly disguised in plain sight as fashionable handbags.
Now he needed only sit and wait for the orders to pour in.
As the cops led Mindfield away in handcuffs he muttered, “If only I hadn’t made that post on YSaC.”
That thought ran through my mindfield as well.
He would have gotten away with it, if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids.
He didn’t have any bags big enough for them.
Good to know that Laurel, myself, and the Hypno-Dogs could help.
Well now hang on a minute, what makes you think that’s about me? Because it certainly isn’t. The FBI doesn’t want me because I haven’t done anything. Well, I mean, there was that one time in Nevada where I killed a man just to watch him die, but y’know, what happens in Vegas…
Dude, I thought that was Reno.
You killed a man in Reno in Vegas?
Ohai, Lola!
Um……There’s a Reno themed casino in Vegas where this killing took place?
That’s all I got.
No, I killed a man named Reno in Vegas.
So … Will they send you to Folsom Prison until you pass through a ring of fire and agree to walk the line?
They’re going to send him to Flotsam Prison.
*whistle blow whistle blow whistle blow*
“Jack!”
It wasn’t the cops that led Mindfield away …. didn’t you notice the white coats and that funny jacket they put him in. I think I’ve seen those people somewhere before.
[word nerdery corey]
I dislike the word “jorts.” I don’t have anything against portmanteau words, but that one bothers me, for some reason. The one that makes me homicidal is “jegging,” but that may be because they, as a clothing article, are a ******** abomination – the unholy love child of tight jeans and leggings, both of which should not be worn by most of the population, ever.
[/word nerdery corey rant]
Let me get my jegging jorts and I’ll be jogging in a jiffy!
*somehow refrains from causing HamCan’s painful demise*
*Gives HamCan a swift kick in the shins for both mine and Lola’s sake* At least you aren’t wearing a jegging jumper!
*tries to blind self’s mind’s eye with regard to concept of “jegging jumper”*
Oooo, jegging jumper jorts…how joyful!
*Jumps out of range*
*dials phone*
Hi, Sniper Service? About that contract I took out earlier: yeah, I’ll pay more if you do it sooner. No, don’t involve the dogs. Just shut Hammy up!
They’ll never get me in my orbiting cave of technological wonders!
*Programs a new fad into the intertubes, Daisy Duke jorts for everyone!!*
*Evil jort-les*
Wait…an “orbiting cave?” As in, a cave that happens to be in space, orbiting? Fine, we’ll just use the new weapon the military is apparently developing, a satellite that drops large pointy spikes at the earth. No accelerants, no explosives, just gravity.
Bwahahaha!
http://www.brandsalsa.com/uncategorized/jorts-jeggings-and-now-jiapers/
I’ve actually seen jiapers at (surprise) Wal-Mart.
I’ve actually been tempted to get the jeans/diapers (not jiapers, never jiapers), because they have the potential to be pretty dang cute. But they’re a good amount more expensive than normal diapers, and they’re Huggies, so I passed on that.
Dang you Hammy with your Daisy Duke jorts! Now I have this image stuck in my head of “The Ladies of YSaC” in Daisy Duke jorts!
I’ll admit though, that Ms. Lola’s avatar in Daisy Dukes is a pleasing image indeed!
Jightey whiteys?
That was more of a [matty matt] vent of indignation.
*I’ve never heard of jeggings or jorts. I hope there are such things as jamas though.*
It started out feeling coreyish and then devolved into mattiness, I think.
Mudsy, look, jajamas do exist! (I would have sent you to the Pajama Jeans website, but they have an auto-play video, and I think that is eeeeeeevil.)
Awesome! Just what I need. An excuse to never have to get dressed in the morning or undressed at night.
Jajamas just may very well be the epitome of evil.
Whew, I almost got trapped there zooming in and out on the back pocket view…
If they made maternity jajamas, those would be all I wore the next time I’m pregnant :-p
Well, if it makes you feel any better, I hate jorts as well. I use the term only when I’m trying to make the subject look pathetic in that People-of-Walmart sort of way.
Totally with you. After work today I went to try and buy a new pair of jeans (this doesn’t happen often, as the process depresses me) and everywhere there were these awful jegging things. Horrible garment, horrible name.
Just imagine being a size 18, and having fashion magazines tell you it’s the in thing for women your size. Uh, do they ENJOY my shame and misery???
I’ll look like homemade sausage in a faux denim casing!
Meredith, I KNOW! Yes, yes, larger women can dress fashionably (and I’m not talking about the earth tones/purples… that’s another rant for another day). But that doesn’t mean the fashion needs to be exactly the same for size 0 and size 18. I definitely couldn’t pull off all the styles at 210 that I could at 140. Because different styles work on different body types. Again, DIFFERENT STYLES WORK ON DIFFERENT BODY TYPES. Was that loud enough to be heard across the internet? And FYI, skinny jeans don’t work on ANYONE but anorexic teenagers, so why would anyone think jeggings *spit* would work, period? [/matt, apparently]
Whew! That was cleansing… This is one of my hot-button issues, stupid clothing designers and their stupid not designing for different body types, just making the item larger…. Excuse me, I have breasts! Make shirts that they fit into! [/matt… again…]
Are you sure you have breasts? Maybe we should inspect them just to be sure.
I think I just channeled Grampdaddy.
Hurrah, EB, as an enmammaried-American (or is that a racked-American?*), I applaud your stance and your philosophy.
*Christina Hendricks isn’t my avatar just because I think she’s cool, it’s because when I was a redhead, I basically was Joan.
Are you sure you have breasts? Maybe we should inspect them just to be sure.
I think I just channeled Grampdaddy.
Thanks TM – I’m glad someone is, because after “playing” with my 50 1st graders, my snark seems to be misplaced.
*OK, everyone sit down, take out your math practice book and turn to p. 23. No, J. – that’s 32…. R. – your math book, not reading – I’m sorry that you don’t want to do math, but that is what we are doing….. M.! – take the trashcan with you and walk to the nurses office…. Umm, J. – that’s p. 74 ….. Everybody! Look! Here! p. 23. It has a picture of a LION at the top of the page…… M. left the trashcan where? and got sick on WHO?…..*
Mammary Enhanced? As in, I’m not bald, I’m scalp enhanced.
Beneficially Boobed? Terrifically Ta Ta’ed?
Grampdaddy’s teaching at MI6?
I so wish we could all get together and design clothes. We could call them,*chuckle* Why Sacs. LOL Each size range would have a different collection, and in those sizes, different designs for different body types. It would be amazing.
*dream sequence shimmy*
Meredith: No, this has to go off the shoulder more. And the straps must have rhinestones.
Lola: Here are Silva’s new fabric patterns. The tesselated tables are adorable!
Windrose: 70 more orders on the black leather Shoulder Knees Holsters. Can we ship by Tuesday next?
TacoMagic: *consults catulator* Uhm. Battle of Hastings?
I thought we were “Sweaterhammed Americans?”
I’d always heard you referred to as Mammericans.
Last I checked, a name hadn’t been decided, because the boys in charge kept getting distra–bewbies!
I have heard them referred to as chesticles” So “Chesticled-Americans”?
I just wrote a bewb rant but my computer eated it. The short version:
Sweater Hams don’t jive with my lifestyle so I’ll stick to melons because sweater ‘fu sounds wrong. I don’t have gighugic bewbs*, but thanks to the idiotic sizing of bras, I have extra letters and can’t buy cheap bras in normal stores which makes me righteously indignant.
*used to have gighugic bewbs, but lost weight and gained an extra letter. WTF?
You wear a WTF FU-bra?
Awesome!
Actually, that makes sense b/c the letter is the difference b/w you band measurement and your bust measurement. If you lost weight of your torso, but not your melons, the letter would go up as the band size goes down.
[bra corey][/corey]
Nope, that’s my bra size, 36wtf.
Edit: to AR: I know, but I lost weight in the breast too, which is why the extra letter annoys me. I guess I didn’t lose enough.
The favorite word I made up entire race of girls is the “Mast Vagority”
SO. DISTURBING.
I’ll pay double in prop 107 1/2 meds!
That is the ugliest bag I have ever seen.
That is all.
And this from the wearer of the flea ridden poncho!
If I were the bag I’d feel really, really insulted.
Now, if you added some Bedazzled deer hoofs, you might be onto something.
YOU CAN PUT THEM IN THE BAG!!!
…along with the Lionel Ritchie Cheese Head!
That is the ugliest bag I have ever seen.
I believe that may actually be a statement made by Bridgette during the ‘Penis Costume’ discussion.
(psst, Gramps, watch that extra T! You don’t want to anger Bridgete. She’s scary when she’s mad.)
It’ll be OK – I didn’t call her Brid__, and I didn’t drop the ‘e’ off. Hammy will help me out, too, by providing references for my Alzheimer’s something or other….
I think we scared Bridgey B-Zizzle off.
No, I wasn’t scared off. Just busy today.
Gramps, you won’t get killed for an extra T. Just for the forbidden abbreviation. 😉
[Rant] When I first saw today’s postings, my first thought was “”I remember those jeans bags (minus the eye catching crap) from when I was a kid. Don’t tell me someone is trying to bring them back”. This got me remembering a trip to Hot Topic several months ago with a friend and her teenage daughter. I looked at the band t-shirts they were selling. I informed the teen that I was listening to those bands when I was her age and asked if they were incapable of coming up with anything new (this also included most everything in the store as I was a military brat living in Europe in the late 70’s – early 80’s when punk came out and see that today’s goth has recycled much of that look as well).
Seriously – is today’s youth so lacking in creativity and originality that they have to rely on trends that are a mere 30 years young for inspiration? (No offense to anyone on here that falls into that age range). It saddens me.
Back to your regularly scheduled snarking.
[End Rant]
After reading that, I fell off my platform shoes because they got caught on my Old Navy bell bottoms.
Wanna buy some tickets to see the Rolling Stones or are you staying home to watch the premiere of Hawaii-Five-O on tv that night?
The beautiful part is that now you can go to stores that specialize in “vintage” clothing and buy the same styles we had 20 or 30 something years ago and pay twice the cost (including taking inflation into account) of the original…
You should see the ties my 20 y/o son comes home with… OW! They hurt they eyes, they do!
I can’t wait for hammer pants to come back in style. I’ll make special trips to the mall so I can point and laugh.
Aren’t they called parachute pants? As in, “if you like this style, you should jump out of a plane using these as a parachute”?
That would be the ones. They tended to come in colors and patterns that could be considered a form of eye-rape.
I want you all to know I will never retrogress in style.
I’m still waiting for the one-piece suits that fly and have cup holders hidden in your armpits.
The scary thing? I’m no longer sure what I meant by that.
I admit to retrogressing when bell bottoms made a comeback, and I’ll never go back to skinny jeans. I don’t care if they stop making everything else, I’ll learn to sew.
I don’t know, I think I’d rather them be listening to stuff from the 70’s and 80’s than most of the stuff that’s been released in the last 15-20 years.
[continued rant]
Talk about a music wasteland. The music industry likes to blame their inability to make a profit on music downloads rather than their inability to produce anything worth listening to, let alone purchasing. Seriously, I haven’t bought a CD* of music in about 8 years, not because I’m downloading music* but because the music isn’t worth owning, or even listening to. You know, I don’t think the music is even worth the time it would take to destroy it.
*Foams at the mouth*
[/rant]
*I actually do a lot of music downloading from individual bands who provide their music free online. Similarly, I have purchased digital CDs from several of these bands as I know the funds go directly to them. What I have not purchased is “mass market” CDs distrubuted by the large media houses; not because I’m “sticking it to the man” but because they don’t have anything I would ever buy.
I think I’m going to call you TacoTorrent from now on. Have you gotten your views from Tipper Gore?
“Aaargh, I’m pirating me music from now on matey.”
If only there was music worth pirating, I would happily do so.
Right now I’m more like the hipster digging through the free samples bin.
*For the record I keep my music downloading largely legal. I download pirated music only when it’s impossible to actually purchase the music (Like say japanese import music that’s been out of circulation for 10 years).
This may be because of the generation-gap, but I like some of the music that’s out now. But, to each his own, I guess.
Probably a generation-gap thing. Plus I’ve already got an old-man cane to shake at the kids on my lawn.
Give it another 10-15 years, NMN, you’ll hate all the music that’s out and grump at all the teenagers because “how can they listen to this crap?”
*Shakes his old-man cane*
Also, there is music that comes out that I like. Just none of it tends to be sponsored by the media conglomerates. It tends to be more independant bands, but not true “indy” music per se.
Thanks to weefee, I have no problem torrenting music that I already put out the money to buy the vinyl for (English Advising Bear hates that sentence).
But I agree with you, lots of music these days belongs in the emo-rap shitter.
I agree with that. If I already own the song on some kind of medium, I don’t feel bad updating it to MP3 (By either downloading or by direct ripping).
Also, with an audio jack, audacity, and some patience you can turn a cassette tape into a rather good quality CD.
Well, first I like to rip it and then I like to burn it. Hehe.
Is that considered a Brazillian?
TacoTorrent? Isn’t that what happens when Taco explosively decompresses his caffeinated beverages?
I’m a big fan of good lyrics, so sometimes I can ignore the music itself…but even with that, I still can only think of one fairly recent artist I actually like. Jason Mraz doesn’t count, he’s not all that recent. Plus I tend not to like his singles. They have just a touch of sellout. I don’t blame him, it’s how you get your voice out there. I wouldn’t do it (part of why I’m NOT out there with an album* and instead went to law school**) but knowing what kind of music is out there, either you don’t get heard except by a select few, or you make a few sellout tracks and hope that people will appreciate the artistry in the tracks you don’t end up releasing as singles.
*Actually, I would have preferred Broadway…but being a singer with an album wouldn’t have been so bad either.
**Not to say that I’m not passionate about the law, because I am. It’s just a different passion.
When The Arcade Fire’s “The Suburbs” became top album for a short while, it gave me hope. They did so by selling it very cheap in the first few weeks. So there you go, music industry. Price good music cheap when it’s released, and people will buy.
But then it went back to the same ol’ over-processed pop and hip-hop crap.
Why do people keep eating up Eminem’s songs about abusing girlfriends? Why is that not banned? When kids love a song about a guy burning down a house with his girlfriend in it, and her singing “I love the way it hurts” (by Rhianna no less, who was beat up by her boyfriend) THERE IS SOMETHING HORRIBLY WRONG.
[/matt]
I say that everything went downhill from 1969, with only brief resurgences.
Also, I mostly listen to what is considered by the average Joe to be “classical”.
Umm…I don’t listen to rap or hip-hop. I listen to rock and alternative.
“Average Joe” often has never heard of the bands I listen to, let alone the songs.
My preference is decidedly alt.country with Texana-folk and bluegrass thrown in.
Gourds, Drive-by Truckers, Reckless Kelly, Jason Boland, Eli Young. and the like. Some more mainstream folk, too. Todd Snyder, Cory Morrow, Roger Creager, REK, JJW.
Since that’s mostly “small label” it needs not meet the strictures of the bubblegum pop-40 “tastes” of the producers infesting Music Row any more. So, the lyrics have depth and meaning, and the tunes are fun as well.
Movies are the same way….my kids thought “Mr. Deeds” was hilarious….and then I showed them the original, with Cary Grant, much better and funnier.
Is it true? Have we run out of ideas? Sigh…
I believe the variety of ideas existing is the same, but the large corporations choosing them only okay according to their own tiny imaginations.
And I’m middle-aged, NMN, and I like some of the music today, too.
If only the could hold themselves back from remaking movies that were never very good in the first place.
Do we really need a remake of Barbarella? Really? *Headdesk*
*Cough Star Wars prequels cough*
You, sir, get the gold star.
Only one good thing came out of the prequels….Darth Maul. I can’t help it; evil is pretty cool.
Oh, and the premises for some video games. But that’s all.
For example, between episodes three and four, Vader got himself a puppet…errr I mean an apprentice.
Evil must be cool, because good is dumb.
EXACTLY….I can provide multiple examples (of evil being cool)….unfortunately they are mostly from video games.
Oh wait, I can provide multiple examples of good being cool too….oh well.
NMN, if you know what I’m referencing, then you get non-videogame-geek-culture points :-p
I wore out two VHS tapes of that movie, and had to make a copy of the DVD because the inner ring was starting to break down from use.
It’s my favorite movie, and I use it as background noise when studying or working on projects.
I remember a weekend before finals where I put the movie in on repeat at 10am on Friday morning and didn’t stop it until 3am on Sunday. When I needed to sleep I just turned off the TV and let the VCR run. Good times.
Unfortunately, I do not know what you are referencing, so I don’t get “non-videogame-geek culture points.” Oh well.
If you have Netflix, add “Spaceballs” now. If you don’t have Netflix, I’m sure you can find it for 7.50 at Target (That’s where I got my copy).
I don’t remember that quote from Spaceballs…..then again, haven’t seen it for a few years.
The quote in full is, “So now you see, evil will always triumph because good is dumb.”
Dark Helmet says this to Lonestar after his ring is tossed through the grating.
That sounds like a tvtropes page, EB.
:switches tabs:
Yep, complete with a page image of Darth Vader wielding dual chainsaw lightsabers.
SJ, I like how you switched tabs, rather than needing to open a new one :-p Also.
After doing some reading I have to ask:
Am I the only person who has a paladin that isn’t Lawful Stupid? Seriously, I have a paladin who actually uttered the phrase “Just because it’s a law doesn’t make it right.” I had to spend 30 minutes defending this to the GM as something a Lawful Good character can do (TVTropes actually reference the book I used to defend my actions). I won the argument and now have a very well liked Paladin, a rarity in the D&D world. (He’s the same Paladin who created sliced coffee and ‘Shugar’)
Also 2) Double bladed lightsabers. If nothing else, they gave us that. Who wants to wield only ONE lightsaber now? Pssshhhhh, whatever.
TM – Pretty much every paladin I’ve ever played with fell under the Lawful Stupid heading. I had one that tried to summarily execute my rogue because I had stolen the keys to our cell.
I think years of playing Palladium gave me a unique outlook on what Lawful Good can (should) mean (IE Principalled in the Palladium world).
Lawful Good (for me) means that you adhere to a set of moral codes that you are convinced serve the greater good. This allows for some flexibility because you don’t have to follow laws simply because they are law. Similarly if one of your moral codes comes into conflict with what is right, you can change or bend your laws to make an allowance for it. Thus, really a LG character is always trying to do what is right as they see it while still trying to adhere to a moral code that they realize may be imperfect at times.
It also allows for deluded Lawful Good characters to serve entities of dubious alignment, which is one of my favorite characters to use as a GM… because it makes my players really angry with that character.
It’s been over a month since my group’s last P&P session. I think I’m getting the itch.
They make a cream for that now.
Gah, stupid timer.
Here’s some random gaming goodness for you, Taco.
Evil being cool: The Joker
Good being cool and fitting with Taco’s LG: Batman (aka the Ultimate Badass)
My work here is done.
Also, is it bad that I like the Star Wars prequels?
Liking them is allowed. Liking them more than the originals is heresy, and for that you will be burned!
I recently read that 90% of the movies that have come out in the last 5 years have been remakes, rewrites or sequels. Hollywood is dead. The end.
Since we are going off-topic, I got another “Do you own a small dog?” call last night.
Is this a warning? A threat? A kidnaping ransom call? Should I buy a small dog? What’s going on?!
Does this person give you a chance to answer or just immediately hangs up before? Perhaps you could just start answering the phone with “Pit bull” instead of “Hello”.
It’s a computer recording. The same recording is played each time and then there’s a pause and a hangup. But I could change my voice mail greeting to “Pit Bull,” for sure!
Did you see Llama-nun’s response to your answering machine query from yesterday?
Why that’s just dasterdly!!
Oh, thanks, Mudslicker. No, I didn’t see it. Geez.
Can’t be legal – they obtained the “permission” fraudulently/under false pretenses (lawyer commenters please weigh in if I am incorrect).
You know, some of these people on Craigslist may want to try this marketing tool.
It’s not legal, I’m sure, but I think they hope people will be intimidated into accepting it. I mean, they have you on a RECORDING! That’s TOTALLY legally binding no matter how much they’ve spliced it together.
My ex had this happen years ago, and the crooks tried to actually switch the mortgage on his parents home. They had a really badly cut recording of him. He thought he was dealing with a bill collector, and was trying to assure them he did not owe a debt. Luckily, my ex takes after a large aggressive dog himself, and he actually tracked these people back to the source and turned in a whole file of information to the authorities.
It’s an infomercial. “Do you own a small dog? No? Then call now! We have chihuahuas, papillions, pekinese…es(?), terriers of all kinds! And, if you call now we will double your order, so you can have all the annoying yappy dogs your heart can handle. Call now at
1-800- TIN-YDOG!”
Don’t call that number, I have no clue who that is.
You crack me up NMN. Although I do contend that calling that number will somehow support Natural Selection.
We keep getting calls from a service that calls around letting people know dogs are missing.
“This is a call to let you know that *Insert Sparky or Sparkettes name* has lost their dog *Insert Spark-dog’s name*. *Spark-dog* is a *type of dog*…blah blah blah….”
My guy has chosen to give out the apartment number to very few people, because he thinks that if someone wants to get a hold of him they can call his cell, and he’s put us on the Do Not Call Registry. But these calls keep coming in, and he runs for the phone every time.
Maybe they’ve taken to proactively looking for lost dogs….or dogs to make lost?
It could be that whomever had the number before you signed up for the service, or it just could be a misdial.
My husband keeps getting calls that his debit card hasn’t been activated. The only problem* with that scam is that he doesn’t have a debit card through the bank that they keep calling about.
*not really, I’m sure there’s more.
I missed the bit when we were on-topic.
It happens occasionally…
So, this is Bag 1.0? Heck, I think I’ll wait for at least the beta version of Bag 2.0 to come out. I hear it comes complete with a full set of fider warches and has da minty shell.
I hear Bag 3.14 will have two cameras, an internal gyroscope, and enhanced graphics for gaming.
No, that’s John 3:14. Bag 3:14 is a totally different passage. I believe it comes from the Book of Bilbo in the Inbetween Testament. Me needs it.
No, Bag 3.14 will have pi(e) in it.
Later edit: crap, Bombdude jinx!
Wouldn’t bag 3.14 come with a pi? or was it a cake…?
OT: So I went to the local HD dealer/showroom to pickup some tune-up/oil change goodies this last weekend, and damn if I didn’t ask for an “oil fider war…*COUGH COUGH* oil filter wrench”…
:hurriedly dries and chops oregano, a/k/a prop 215 meds (in Italy), in hopes of scoring TV:
Right before I graduated high school (Class of ’98) the school made it against the rules to possess oregano on school grounds. I can only guess that this was to protect idiots stupid enough to not only buy pot at a public school, but to buy fake pot at a public school.
We wanted to buy a green japanese maple just to screw with the RAs.
That.Is.Awesome.
Taco, I am soooooooo tempted to buy one of those for my office…and then sit back and enjoy….heh..heh..
Sometimes my affinity for botany can be amusing. My room mate at the time was floored that there was a plant that looked enough like cannabis to freak people out.
We always joked that we’d come back to the room and find our plant stripped of all it’s leaves with a pair of dissapointed stoners going, “Dudes, your stuff isn’t very strong. You got another plant hidden away somewhere?”
[true cannabis corey] Umm…without giving away too much, let’s say that I work in an industry which requires remote locations involving lots of land that’s left unattended…how’s that for cryptic? One day, we got a visit from some DEA and FBI agents…they looked very stern and intimidating as they marched into my office to request access to one of the more remote areas of our property. Access was granted, and the agents found thousands of *COUGH*”green japanese maple*COUGH* look-alikes…
LONG after they were gone, we started with the “Damn, there goes my retirement fund…..” jokes…
I got a cool DEA hat out of it, and have worn it a few times. Freaks the hell out of people. [/end true cannabis corey]
“Dude, I think this pot is fake…”
“No way, man, I’ve already got the munchies for pizza!”
“The special brownies you made this time are really weak, dude. And they taste a lot like my mom’s spaghetti.”
If Pavlov is right, you could train said idiots to get a contact high from an Italian restaurant.
Baby, I’m banking on the oft-proven stupidity of a CLer.
That’s a pretty safe bet, CJ.
Y’all have got the first ad all wrong. He’s not giving away a tv set. He’s protesting the incarceration of his brother TV. TV was charged with a DUI and reckless driving after only drinking 2 or 3 cases of beers and running over some lawn gnomes. Like that’s a big deal. And so what if TV hasn’t paid his child support, he’s pretty sure that the judge faked those dna tests, I mean she was already 13, so she’d probably been with lots of guys. Poor TV, he should be free.
The Innocence Project: Electronics Division.
The end of that might have just put this over the top for the “more disturbing than Mindfield’s serial killer epic” award.
Charlie and The Chocolate Factory – Where Are They Now?: Mike TV
The more I stare at the bag, the uglier it gets.
It’s like some kind of exponential function of ugliness. But I can’t stop looking; I CAN’T STOP LOOKING!
Fugly?
Well, exponential function of ugliness so…
e-fugly.
f(ug)=|3.14x-3|+42
Yanno, I am a somewhat serious crafter my own self. I have more craft stuff than one human should be allowed to have. (Yes, NMN, including a hot glue gun.) I have an Etsy store. I actually have a craft business, selling stuff at Society for Creative Anachronism events and at holiday bazaars. I tell you this so you will believe me when I say I know fugly crafts. And THIS is a fugly craft.
HOLY CLOTHESPIN JEEBUS – I JUST NOTICED SPARKLES WANTS $85 FOR THIS ABOMINATION!!! SOMEONE PLEASE KILL ME.
Have a link to your etsy store?
I like old-timey things.
It’s kinda lame, mostly because I detest photographing jewelry (which is a large portion of what I make). There’s not much there. But if you go to Etsy.com, you can search by sellers. My seller name is AndreaJD (I didn’t know until too late that your username had to be your shop name.) My business is called The Cat and Candle.
I like the dutchess necklace. 🙂
Very cool! I love crafting, but I have no talent so I just end up with a walk-in closet full of sparkly odds and ends that I pick up from the clearance racks at our local craft stores. Paper seems to be my worst weakness. I hate scrapbooking and get mad that Michael’s too out a good chunk of the woodworking section to expand on scrapbooking supplies, but for some stupid reason, if I see pretty paper I buy it. So far the only use I’ve put it to is lining drawers and handmade holiday cards.
Ooooh pretty! I’m partial to the red necklace…
Thanks. : )
You’re welcome.
*I know that Andie is thanking Silva, but since it didn’t nest properly, I’m stealing the thanks.
You’re welcome, kelli.
Wait… what?
[Cranky OT] Alright, which one of you sent the stuffed hawk poltergeist to my house last night? I just opened the freezer and, lo and behold, there were my glasses. They disappeared right in the middle of the Niners/Saints game. You younger YSaCers should have more respect for your elders! Someday, you too will be old just like me and be easily confuzzled! Dagnabit! [/end Cranky OT]
*shakes frozen turkey leg at the Snark Lounge*
Om nom nom. Turkey leg.
Cool glasses Archie!
New puppy.
I’m stealing that puppy!
Nobody shakes a leg like you do, Archie. 8)
Legs, yes. However, you will not catch me shakin’ sweater hams. Pasties or not. Period.
I love you all so much. 8) I may not have time to read every post, but by gum, I love the fact that we almost broke 400 on a Tuesday!
This just in: The Saturday Round up and the First Part of the Sunday Round-up are in the forums. Fora. Whatever.
jennifer w., your idea was awesome! I laughed. I actually laughed out loud. Glad it made it to the box. Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Vegas — uh, Reno! Whatever.
It’s official, this website makes me want to draw odd stuff.
http://distracted-doodler.deviantart.com/art/wtf-garage-sale-180106719
I like it!
And your avatar, too. Marmalade kitten is irresistable.
Thank yew 😉
*Click*
*Sigh*
*Click*
*Sigh*
*Click*
*Sigh*
*Sigh*
*Sugh*
*Cluck*
*Sugh*
*Cluck*
*Sugh*
*Cluck*
*Cluck*
*Cluck*