YSaC, Vol. 784: The bowls of hell.
Champer Pot/Soup Server? – $30
Not sure if this is a chamber pot or soup server, but it’s really nice! $30Email for more info
Amanda sent this in, pointing out that if they don’t know whether it’s a chamber pot or a soup server, she really doesn’t want to eat at this person’s house.
Then, she wonders: “If this person doesn’t know what it is, how much more information are they going to be able to provide if I email them for more info?”
LOOKING TO ADD SOME ELAGENCE TO YOUR HOME ??? – $30
HELLO I HAVE
Princess house plate bowel set i have this beautiful dish set from my husband mom and we are wanting to sell it for 30 and if your willing to pay more we would perfer that thy are woth over
100 and we just need money they are clear with littl blue plates
SIX bowels
a serving bowel
ONE saucer
ONE large bowel
SEVEN small plates
THREE medeum
SEVEN large
Well, those are very elagent, but you know what? Never mind. I’ll just stop eating entirely, I think.
Thanks, Amanda and JenB!
It’s a relief to see the bowel movement is still going strong.
I’ll be more relieved when it’s finished.
Mindy, is that a sh!t eatin’ grin your avatar has?
😉
That’s actually the oldest monster after informing me she decorated her younger brother from head to toe with a Sharpie!
If it was a sh!t eating grin, her teeth wouldn’t be nearly so white. (With all of the disgusting and devious things my children have done in their short lives, I wouldn’t put it past any of them!)
Clearly the answer is to have multiple bowels, so you aren’t stuck with having just one every day.
I see it more akin to a religious experience—like the Shroud of Tureen.
What we need to do is to lend these Sparkies samovar expertise in identifying dishes.
So bad, Isaac, so bad. Have an invisible door.
Hey, I’ve seen something similar in Isaac’s place…but he called it something different: The Danktainer – A container in which “dank” or “green, bud, pot, weed…” is kept until smoked. Danktainers must have floral patterns, no discernible use other than keeping dank, and typically take form as pottery or ceramics.
Note! Iassac will smoke you out if you “Adores” this post.
Holy crap, Mudsy!
That’d be what it is Manda.
The movement was a little strained there for a while when the economy took the dump, but now that we’ve recovered a bit everyting is flowing quickly again!
And with the demand running so high right now, I think these products will make a huge splash in the market.
The movement is okay, it’s all that paperwork that really wipes me out.
Yeah, the line? It left this note: You people ought to be ashamed of yourselves! I’ve gone somewhere where I can be respected. The DMV loves lines.
Poor Line. Always the butt of so many jokes.
It’s about time the moral fiber of this country got it’s crap together!
I can’t take this kind of pressure on Thursday!
Stool softener to the rescue! With sidekick, Meta Mucil.
And…I probably should have eaten my Raisin Bran before stopping by the site today.
It’s what all the regulars do.
I wash my hands of all this poopy humor.
What, you don’t like crappy puns?
Where’s Lou Stool when you need him?
I’m getting an ad for “Terra Trike – The worlds most comfortable ride”.
It looks like Sparky #1 is offering to give more info if you email her $30, but the ad does not specifically state that it has to be info on the “Champer Pot”, which is good since s/he seems fairly clueless about it.
I’m more than willing to scan thirty dollars and email it to her/him if s/he will explain how Justin Bieber became popular. What the heck, I’d even send the thirty twice so s/he would have $60.
I’ll send Sparky a scan of an authentic elebenty-bazillion note if I can get the answer to…Reality TV…WTF????
Sometimes I just have to wonder if those spelling errors are intestinal.
Well, how else are they going to see any movement of the product?
Those bowels are transparent so it’s probably really easy to see movement in them.
They have six bowels and a serving bowel. That sounds incredibly uncomfortable. And awkward. And quite possibly the second-worse accessory for a dinner party ever conceived.
All they need is Lionel to make the party complete….
From head to worse . . .
Actually serving bowels are pretty handy for stuff like refried beans, mashed potatoes, beef filling for tacos, etc. Just squeeze.
Eating out of one though is a bit of a trial…
There’s probably more than one website that will show you how, comeplete with pictures and maybe even video. You have to give them your credit card info first, though.
I expect ‘serving bowel’ to be more like a midwife.
Last time I served a bowel it barely made it over the net.
You needed more carbon fibre, obviously
Spacebug, what kind of anatomy classes did you attend?
Anatomy? At the Eastern University of Northern South Dakota, that class was for dokterz ‘n’ such.
They had me at ELAGENCE.
Nice to see that the bowel “set” is so eclectic and incomplete and practically not a set at all.
Well, you know, having your bowels all matchy-matchy is SO last year.
What a relief, I was worried these wouldn’t match my electric grave bowel. Thanksgiving dinner is saved!
Who knows how to add a little “elagence” to your dinning experience better than a husband-mom*?
*I’m guessing that McSparkcase family reunions are small, intimate affairs.
Hyacinth Bucket question–“elagence” is the “a” long, and is the “g” soft or hard?
Ummmm, depends on how much fiber is in it.
Too much fiber makes ’em stringy.
In ”elagence”, the “g” is a hard on.
*I swore to myself yesterday that I was done with my personal meme, but, geez, that was just sitting there, wasn’t it?
Did you drop an “e” Bianchi or weren’t you carrying any?
Bianchi needs to seek medical attention. His hard on has lasted five days.
Last time I had a colonoscopy, I got a straight A!
(I know, I’ve said that before, but it’s one of my best jokes)
They are being very “green.”
It’s the ultimate in recycling, holds “soup” both coming and going.
Saves water too, no flushing and you only have to wash it once.
For if thee wish to pullith out the swrod fromith this stone and anvil, thy inner woth must be greatith, at least 100 greatith or more! But if it be thirtyith instead, we wouldith still let thee giveith it a pullith. Truthith be told, thee couldith probably pullith the swrodith outith for a fractionith of a 1 wothithith, but the management requireist at least 30 of them.
King Arthur wouldn’t want a princess house plate bowel set—even if it does involve Excalibur and 100 Woths and SEVEN* large.
*Brad Pitt: “What’s in the box?”
Arthur had enough troubles with the half-sister, a princess, proper, probably would have resulted in grave bowels.
Disney didn’t cover all that in the animated movie.
“thy are woth over 100”
Uhm, “thy” = singular formal “you”
“are” = present tense of “to be”
“woth” = old cant version of “was [being]”
“other” = too many to list {g}
thus,
You are was being over 100 or You’re having been over 100
100 what?
Is this china some sort of Warhouse Artifact? It makes you travel in time? Reverses the process of aging? Will cause your personally-owned-vehicle to reach never-before achieved speeds?
Will Ms Fredrick come and Tesla somebody? Maybe me if Sparquie is too elusive?
It’s OVER NINE THOUSAND!!
*ahem*
All I can say is, if Sparky #1 doesn’t know whether it’s a “champer pot” or a soup server, do I really want nything to do with it? Which one have they been using it as? If the former, I certainly don’t want to try to flip it and use it for the latter purpose.
There’s really not a cleaning product in the world strong enough, no matter how much is used or how long it is soaked in it, that would make me want to consume anything placed in the “champer pot/soup server”.
Don’t “soup servers” generally have an indentation where the ladle is able fit so that the lid lays flush [oh yeah, intentional pun!]?
Which doesn’t negate from the fact that Sparkette may have let her husband use it to collect used motor oil or 50 year old Crisco since 1974.
Old and vintage are not necessarily a good thing.
{tureen corey]There’s usually a notch in the lid so the ladle handle can protrude.[/tureen corey]
I guess there could be an indent in the bottom for the same purpose.
Does molten lava count as a cleaning product? Because I’m pretty sure once it’s been in that, it’s very clean….or nonexistent….whichever…
Immersion in molten lava is acceptable, or being ground into a fine powder, mixed with fresh clay, cast into a new tureen, and then glazed and fired. But only one of those two.
Hey, wait a second.
Champer?
Some one who champs? (Champ being a form of “bite”–ick)
I guess that “champer” is better than “chamfer” which is to slice or mill a 45º angle from an edge.
Just the thing to delay housebreaking, whilring router bits or razor-sharp plane knives associated with the ceramic known as a commode.
A champer is something you put your dirty clothes in.
Seem like the dhamper would be for dirty clothes, and the champer for clean ones . . .
Wait, isn’t Champer a robot on Futurama?
‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy; Thou art thyself, though not a soup tureen. What’s soup tureen? It is nor hand, nor foot, nor arm, nor face, nor any other part belonging to a chamber pot. O, be some other name! What’s in a name? that which we call a chamber pot by any other name would smell as sweet……
I thought this was Dickens week…..
I’ll never look at Willie the Shake quite the same again.
SCENE I. A cavern.
Thunder. Enter the three Sparqii
First sparqi
Thrice my blinded catulator hath mew’d.
Second sparqi
Thrice and once the emasculated wombat whined.
Third sparqi
Harpier cries ’tis time, ’tis time.
First sparqi
Round about the champer go;
In the bedazzled hooves you throw.
Toad, that under winterbagel.
Bees in trucks and a red table.
Swelter’d Lionel chessehead got,
Boil thou bowel i’ the champer pot.
ALL
Double, double toil and trouble;
Six bowels burn, and champer bubble.
Second sparqi
Fillet of 20 meat gerberts,
In the champer, in little spurts.
Swingfortslide and Corey and Matt.
Will someone pleeeease spin that cat.
A roadkill fridge with a minty shell.
A bronze lady and a doll from hell.
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth, boil and bubble.
ALL
Double, double toil and trouble;
Server bowel burn and champer bubble.
Mmmm, who wants dinner?
A Brazillion million and elebenty adores for unearthing “will somebody please spin that cat!”
Memelicious!
Wow. I’m just really annoyed at the second ad….We have this and then this and then this and then this and then that and over there is that thing……Put a freaking period or five in your ad, or no one will take you seriously and you will end up on this site!*
*You should probably ignore my ranting.
Given the rather … whimsical spelling used, it’s probably a good bet they would have ended up here even if they had used proper punctuation.
It’s okay NMN. We all have days where only a rant will do. Let it all out. Hmmm, perhaps the wrong phrase given today’s ads.
Dunno, suggesting they add a cyclical biological process to the extant enumeration of viscera probably not the best way to improve the outcome.
Champer Pot/Soup Server…?
“No poop for you! Get out of my store!”
— The poop Nazi
That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.
“Waiter, what’s this dung beetle doing in my soup?”
The back stroke…
That’s not the soup pot.
:makes mystical hand motion:
These are not the bowels you are looking for.
Doesn’t the first one need another tag?
Tureen Test = Fail
I have a Champer-ion
I’ve done my poops
Time after time
I’ve done my business
my butt emitted some grime
And bad smells
I’ve made a few
I’ve stuffed my share of bad cheese in my face
But It’s come through
I have a Champer Pot- my friends
And I’ll keep on farting – out the end
I have a Champer Pot
I have a Champer Pot
No time for loose ones
‘Cause I have a Champer Pot – that holds soup
Ewwwww….but Awesome!
Can I get that jingle on my iPod?
Probably, but you’d have to clean it rather thoroughly afterwords.
Apparently it can only be cleaned with molten lava. Talk about jammed up and jelly tight.
It would likely void the warranty as well.
That was a sly pun there SJ. A door for you.
I will send it to you in Mpee3 format…
I only accept Misjay4 format….
Oh wait…I see what you did there.
Why do people always want to void where prohibited?
Well, given the general lack of impulse control demonstrated in other activities, why should we expect evacuations to be any more disciplined?
What, no Fight Club bisque references yet?
HELLO I HAVE
a distinct lack of teh snark today.
All I can say is, I wonder if Sparkette 2 took some ex-lax prior to the post… Then, she is probably feeling like she has multiple bowels, because there’s no way that was all in one bowel.
I’m not feeling the snark either, EB. Maybe later, after this coffee kicks in.
Coffee usually gets things going for most people. Others need bulk fiber.
Ditto.
Hmm, wonder why it is the coffee people never got on the bran wagon
It works for energy drinks, too. MMMmmm, 160 mg of caffeine in my water bottle…
Hmm, Ubran Coffee, for regulars only?
Folger’s Fiberfull?
Maxwell–nope, not going there.
My typical day involves several tankards of coffee, 150-200% rda of fiber and no meat. The last thing I need is bran.
For just 100 I can get seven large? A 7000% return? I’ll take it!
Yeah, the trick is in finding out if you have to give up 100 vintage cereals to ‘earn’ getting seven large oboes up the bowel (without vintage crisco, probably, too)
i’ll be nice. it’s rosh Hashanananah. i like the idea of the shroud of tureen tho.
speeling countsses.
Hey, you spelled a lot of those words incorrect…
Oh… right.
**blows Shofar at queensbee**
I’m so glad I finally checked in — I’ve had a migraine for several day. I thought it was feeling better, but now my head is just spinning.
Here, Artsy, take two bowels of chambered soup, a dozen meat gerberts, some vintage Crisco, and a handful of chips “salvaged” out back of the dollar store.
If you’re headache doesn’t go away, at least your eyes won’t be so brown any more…*
*VERY obscure reference…wonder if anyone will get it….
you’re —> your
That was obscure CJ! I bet you learnt that in Taco’s ESL class.
😉
Holy Schnikes!! I laughed to tears, mudsy, when I read this….absolute your–you’re FAIL!!
And, not the ref I was talking about BTW.
I told a coworker just the other day over the phone, that I knew his eyes were brown because he was full of s&^t.
He just insisted that he had blue eyes. Yeah, right.
:hugs L-squared:
Yesssssssssss!! My mama has been telling me that since I was knee-high to a grasshopper.
She’s right.
I was always told to wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which fills up first.
All that ever did for me was make a mess.
I was told to always “wish” in the right hand, since that’s the one you shake with.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m all “pooped” out.
I think CapnMac is as well because I heard he was down on the poop deck acting all crappy about something.
[nautical corey] “Poop deck” and the associated cabin the deck forms the roof of, take their name from the French, la poupe, or stern.
Which comes to french by way of the latin puppis.
Which is why I cannot read “I has a hotdog”–it makes me want to champer the tureen.
[/corey]
Well, my la poupe tends to hang out in my aft.
Or vice versa.
Nonsense! I’m not stopping until we get to the bottom of this!
Oh goody! I’ll get the snorkeling gear !!!!
I’m flush with excitement!
Just don’t squeeze the Charmin’.
I’m feeling a little pooped.
Aww, crap
I’m just passing through….
Without any help? I bet that made your whole day!
Don’t you think we’ve eliminated all of the foul puns we can do for this topic?
We haven’t even started with the “turd in the soup bowl” jokes yet.
[rant]Much as I a-door every one of you, my ‘puter is a diva and apparently has decided I may not whack anyone with doors today…and it keeps giving me that stupid 400 error again…sigh…I suppose I should be productive and complete this massive (100 slide) Power Point preso that is due tomorrow…grr…I’d rather a-door y’all..[/end rant]
I was always told the tureen had 2 handles and the thunder mug had one. I would not eat soup out of what’s in that picture.
That was a very [corey Antiques Outhouse] bit of information.
Good to know.
I wouldn’t want to own anything called a “thunder mug”.
Some quick checking on Google tells me there is no real rule about the number of handles either one has. Some of the chamber pots I found look exactly like really fancy casserole dishes.
By the by, SJ. Are coming to dinner?
I’m making my famous tuna noodle casserole. 8)
I’ll come provided you serve it steaming in a fancy casserole dish!!!
Mudsy, everyone’s invited… I just need a few more hours to strain the noodles…. er, I mean cook the noodles.
Oh good. I’ll bring some waffles.
[weird historical food corey] In those “good old days” of giant dining rooms and fancy, liveried servants, it turns out the food served was usually just tepid at best, and more typically room-temperature.
So, not only were you stuck in a room without airconditioning, with people whose opinions on bathing were based on the quality of water available, and who used actual mineral powders–zinc, lead, arsenic–for “beauty” puposes, but you were served tepid food.
Kitchens were often the entire mansion away from the dining room (and often the size of the group defined which room had tables laid out).
So, the “help” who often ate in the kitchens, probably had better fare than their “betters” upstairs and down the Great Hall away.
The soup went from its cauldron or olla to the tureen, which was then toted off to the side board by the “fancy” diners. Then it was ladled into bowls for service when not transfered to a serving tureen.
Take that, you snobbo foodies, your elitism does not have enough HP to overcome me! Bwahahaahaha!
[/corey]
Damnit, now I really want Albóndigas.
Ah, yes, braised in some salsa con carne with a nice arroz with canned peppers.
Alright people. Since you all were the ones who guided me to GIMP, I need recommendations for another free program, this time to edit the .mov files that my digital camera creates when I make a video. I don’t want to do much, all I want to do is take out the sound on 3 videos I took during a nighttime boat ride down the Seine (the random conversations in the background kind of ruin them), so I’m not about to pay for Quicktime Pro just for that. Thanks!
Have you tried Virtualdub? You’ll probably have to use a video converter (like RadVideo) to convert the Mov file to something virtualdub can read, but as far as free full featured movie editing software, you can’t really beat Virtualdub.
http://www.virtualdub.org/
Actually, I found a plugin that allows you to open MOV files directly with virtualdub. There is a link to download the pack here:
http://www.videohelp.com/tools/Virtualdub
It’s under the “Import Plugins” section of the post.
I usually use windows media encoder (free) to convert them to .wmv’s in the process you can remove the sound no problem.
Even though windows media encoder does not have .mov and a choice for file conversions it still lets you convert them.
Thanks you two! 🙂
Since HamCan hasn’t done it, I’ll get today’s Anagram Fun under way:
Champer Pot Soup Server:
Perverts Poop Mesh Ham
Yay!
A Chomp Reverts Supper!!!
A Pervert Chorms Supper?
A Pervert Rumps Pooches (Run puppy!)
Arch overseer Pumps Pot (High villain?)
Cashmere Popover Spurt (Oops, stained her sweater)
Sharecropper Puts Move (Squatter tries to pick up farmers daughter)
Overpurchase Met Props (Buy to much NY baseball junk)
Hepcats Over pour Sperm (Usually)
One of the ones that wordsmith gave me is:
Pervert Preach Opossum (Evangelizing to marsupials?)
Also:
Each Pervert Romps Soup (uhmmmm…)
Um, Taco, your anagram is missing the letter “C,” which is in the original.
How about
Sharecropper Vote Sump
Cheaters Popover Rumps
Procreates Prove Humps
Ace Pervert Humps Spoor
Cashmere Trove Pro Pups
Machetes Over Pop Purrs
On my note I wrote Mesh as Mesch… and then I spell checked my post and wasn’t paying attention to what it was actually telling me.
Wow… should have had coffee today.
I should mention that Mesch IS a viable word, since it’s a village in Limburg.
However, ieSpellcheck doesn’t know that.
I typed Anagram into Google and it spit back:
“Did you mean: Nag A Ram?”
Well played, Google, well played.
I don’t think it’s wise to nag a ram… that’s how one can end up head-butted.
(puns not intended)
I get here late yet again…. I see you guys have kept it classy in my place.
Oh yes. We are very calassay 🙂
You may want to keep your shoes on. Preferably a pair you don’t mind throwing away. Judging by all the poo flinging, I’m guessing someone let a wild pack of monkies in here.
This snark is in bad taste, I declare!
Although, that’s probably due to mixing up the champer pot and the soup bowel. I mean, that’s just not kosher.
I’d rather not imagine the taste of this snark, thankyouverymuch…
Especially when you throw in a little Ham.
Speaking of bad taste…
Chamber Pot Chowder
4 cups yellow broth, warm
1 turtle head
Deuce brown trout
27 Corn Kernels
1 dozen peanuts
3 specks Celery
2 large pimentos, mashed
1 large dingle berry
A pinch of loaf
1/2 moon Butter
Flush well before serving
Oh my! I shoulda been more awake today. I’m
on a boat!in the box!how appropriate…. the co-worker was prepping for his colonoscopy tomorrow. I’ll have to let him know if something is bad with his, he can get another bowel on C.L.
Hey, Taco changed from whatever he was before back to whatever the heck he is now. And with that I bid you all a good night.*
*In other words, I need to get up early and thus** must go to bed early.
**Yes, I just said “thus.”
I’m not really sure what Taco is supposed to be, but it looks like he’s got itty bitty blue boobies.
Okay, Christina, Here’s a do-si-do punchity punch punch!
G’Night, Brownville!
:click:
*sigh*
:click:
*sigh*
:click:
*sigh*
click:
*sigh*
:click:
*sigh*
:click:
*sigh*