YSaC, Vol. 730: Magrat, how do I stop spelling recommendation?
Need a 2 Professional references letters
Hello,
I am applying to an undergrad Radiology tech program in Yonkers & Queens, I am looking for a well written letter of recommendation. Must be on company letter head and checkable. does not matter what company you have as long as its checkable (i.e they can call you to verify)
reference can also be from clergy, professor or church,
if you can help me please send an e-mail
Please included your fee when responding
I would be happy to write this person a reference letter. Here’s what I would write:
Sparky is an efficient exchanger of carbon dioxide and oxygen. He/she is externally bilaterally symmetrical, and capable of limb-independent motions. I’m sure that Sparky will be a source of revenue for your program.
Signed,
Professor $50 fee
Who better to ask to forge recommendation letters than the clergy (or church itself)! At least we know that Sparky wouldn’t get brain damage from the radiation. Although I am going to be looking at my radiologists a bit more suspiciously now.
Thanks, Debbi!
Gee, I wonder if Sparky needs someone to take the classes for him/her too.
I believe Sparky is the ‘test subject’ rather than the student.
Why I’d love to write a “Professional references letters” for Sparky! I happen to belong to the Church of Neverending Nii Sounds. The fee will be a handsome shrubbery. If an appropriate shrubbery can not be found, I’m willing to accept vintage cereals in a minty shell.
But, after the second reference letter, and you have a split-level effect, then what?
Ok, ok, so the mightiest oak in the forest is felled with a herring, so, maybe the third letter is a Chimenia or fire pit, or a levy of Shrubbers . . . or a draft of Hewers to split all that oak into useful bits . . .
Love the Monty Python allusions!
If I were a different person (read that as “not lazy”) I would write the letter, and then when whomever was calling to check out the reference called, I would tell them the complete truth. That way I’d have my fee for writing the letter and be able to expose Sparky as the weaseling, slimy, unethical nutjob he or she is.
Can they call you anyway?
Oddly, I’ve never had to write a reference letter. Something about have a sarcastic, abrasive, tactless manner makes people think twice before listing me on an application.
It’s one of the great mysteries of life.
Possibly, they know that the perception of their usage of English will suffer badly in comparison if their prospective employer has a good sample with which to compare.
Or maybe you’re just honest. That works, too.
SJ – Writing the letter, accepting a fee and then ratting on poor Sparky would be weaseling, slimy and unethical. I like the way you think……
Not that I want to give Sparky any ideas, but a letterhead is easy to make. Friends can often be talked into answering their phones with a company name and verifying references. Oh wait, maybe Sparky doesn’t have any friends. Sorry, Sparky.
How is it that Sparky has NO ONE to write him a 2 Professional references letters? How bad is your life that you feel you NEED to turn to Craigslist in order to get a 2 letters?
I’m just as confused as you are.
After all, he’s such a radiant personality. Let’s sign him up with pal-pal.
He’s been sitting in the chair?
I didn’t smell him, so I don’t know for sure.
Ow, Limelolly! Ow!
Here’s 2 letters for Sparky: F U.
Very nice, Christina. I’m making an early call on you being in the box tomorrow.
Thanks LRC, I’m just letting my inner 12 year old out
of the basementtoday 🙂I have to assume that cosmetology school didn’t work out, and Sparkie is moving on to another career path. I am guessing that there will soon be a CL posting looking for a “twin” to take radiology courses for him/her.
At least they’ll always have the photographs of them exiting their private jet.
I totally thought of Ashley too, Grampdaddy. That and the letter to the ethics board.
Her Llamanun-ness drmk, Bees be with her:
I humbly submit an addition to your letter of reference. A minor addition, but telling:
Sparky is an efficient , but worthless, exchanger of carbon dioxide and oxygen.
May the Ostrimu make you breakfast in bed.
Slightly off topic, but this made me think of a boss I once had. He was truly a waste of genetic material. I called him a gothamist and refused to tell him what it meant for three days. I gave him an electronic dictionary for Christmas.
Oh, gothamist, that’s the cloud of clove smoke that enters the room a full minute before the sullen teenager in black, right?
[U.S. corey] Not since October of last year, when the sale of flavored tobacco (other than menthol) was banned for sale in the US.
So the smells from sullen black-clad urchins and waifs are, uh, um, home-composed (barring proximity to international borders or Indian Reservations).
[/corey]
Wait, what? The sale of flavored tobacco was banned? But what about the hookahs! *pouts*
I don’t smoke, generally, but I have enjoyed a hookah with flavored tobacco now and again. More of a social thing.
Hookah doesn’t count; that’s considered pipe tobacco, which is taxed and sold differently. (I occasionally roll my own smokes using cherry pipe tobacco because it’s cheaper.)
Oh, well, that’s alright then.
[back to the corey] Pipe tobacco made it complicated. And it’s a PITA to look up the particulars. Running on memory, clove oil is right out, and certain berry and fruit flavors, other than distillates for alcohol flavorings like sloe cherries and the like.
The theory was that teeners were being coerced into tobacco and drug use by way of clove and other flavored tobaccos, in rolled cigarettes and in “hookah” tobaccos.
In reality, it very much looks like some one at Kretek/Djarum upset somebody high up, and they were stepped upon.
Here (for what it’s worth) is the “Wiki” on “The Family Smoking Prevention and Tobacco Control Act”.
Now, the smart folk at kretek make a “cigar” where the wrapper is natural tobacco leaf (not paper) and said wrapper can be flavored with clove oil. But, it is definitely not the same (and a stronger smoke).
All of which varies by location and circumstance, so your mileage may vary.
[/corey]
[clove corey] Actually, clove cigars and flavored cigars still exist with minimal changes to the flavor (they are slightly more “cigar-like”). I’ve noticed that some of the other companies that used to sell flavored cigarettes, like American Dream, switched to cigar format. My husband smokes the clove cigars, but I’ve lost my taste for them and switched to smoking cigarettes, which I smoke more of, so the law technically failed in it’s agenda to curtail smoking.
You can still get clove cigarettes, but they now have to have filters, and they might be called cigarellos. But, they are still available.
I know about A4 paper size, but A2? Maybe Sparky made a typo. Sparky should hire a proof reader for those letters.
Like, duh Windrose, A2 paper is easy to make, you just fold A4 in half. 😀
Catmath at work – a practical application …….
[paper corey]
Page sizes are very much catmath.
The lettered ANSI sizes tending to be in pairs, and being fractions of each other.
A size, 8.5 x 11, is half of B 11 x 17; C, 18 x24, half of D, 24 x 36. Then, there’s E, 32 x 48. which is half a roll of 64″ wide paper.
All of which is easily confused with folio, quarto, sexto, octavo, etc. sizing.
Or in the “entertainment” sizes, which run to 4:3 proportions (and have the distracting label of “arch” or “architectural” despite the fact that most US architects use ANSI-sized sheets).
This before adding in metric-sized, and the ISO sizing. The German version being adopted almost de facto, where all of the sheets are the same proportion when halved. So an A0 halved yields two A1, four A2, etc. The graphic for this looks remarkably like a golden section, except that it is based on square root of 2, and not the approximate square root of 5 that is the golden section.
[/corey]
Is a “paper corey” anything like a paper
tigernot.a.lion?To whom it may concern:
Sparky would make a excellent X-ray tech as you can already see right through him.
Currently the Hungerfords’ bed time book is Lords and Ladies by Terry Pratchett. 8) Love the reference to Magrat.
All hail Queen Magrat!
I think they also have trouble stopping spelling “continuum” and “banana”, don’t they?
How do I get my picture to not look so swastika like?
Register the email you used with Gravatar and add a photo or use a different email when commenting to get another quilt-block thing.
Let’s see if this works.
Excellent. Thank you, Miss.
Does this mean Sparky already wrote the admission essay? Why not hire that out too?
For a small extra amount, I can just write the diploma for Sparky. Who needs those pesky university years?
Forge a diploma, forge some school records (a 3.8, just so that no one is suspicious), and you’re all set!
Someone found a letter I wrote for you, on radiology.
And I told the school just how I felt.
It must have fallen out of a hole in your head
They said your name
so I told them just what I meant.
Oh, you were so surprised and shocked, and I
Wondered too
If by chance you heard it for yourself.
I told every soul just how I’ve been feeling
about you
And I said it really loud.
I said you were a derriere .
No radiology for you whoa oh oh
No radiology for you whoa oh oh
No radiology for you whoa oh oh
No radiology for you whoa oh oh now, now
I love helping people into medical professions when they have no experience/skill in the area. I’m always hoping when I go to the hospital that my radiologist used random people from Craigslist to get into school. Unfortunately, I have a hunch that Sparky may fail out of the program…
So THAT’s how some of the radiology techs at my work got their jobs! I’ve always maintained that they were woefully proficient at continued respiration, and if that was a primary qualifier for their choice of vocation I should consider a change of profession.
“Taco, I can’t get the images to come up after I expose this patient. Fix it!”
*Looks at the way it’s set up.* “Ok, where’s your cassette?”
“Cassette? I need to use on of those?”
*Headdesk*
Taco — I think you may be over qualified to write that recommendation (although, from what I hear about “that little black dress”, exposing was the correct term to was use).
I may never get x-rays again.
To be fair, many of the girls in our radiology department are very good at what they do. However, there are a few outliers that make me frightened.
Well…okay. I’ll just hope I don’t get one of the outliers, then.
Whoo-hee Taco! – you get away with “girls”? Mrs. Grampdaddy and daughters would hang you up by your….’thong’ for referring to them as girls.
You really DO love to live dangerously.
Huh. You know, I don’t find it offensive to be called a girl, either alone or as a member of a group of females.
Oh, also, here’s that E you dropped.
*picks up the E and hands it to Taco*
Oh, so that’s where it went. I’d wonderd.
Thankes.
No prob. I figured you’d want it.
Time to share a moment of brilliance with you people.
I was holding a mostly full coffee mug and had an itch on my forehead. So I scratched it… with the the hand holding the mug. The result was that I no longer had an itch, and that I now have a coffee flavored keyboard.
*Grumbles as he wanders off to get a butter knife and a rag*
Haha, I’m sorry, but you made me laugh so hard that the cat started meowing at me out of concern. Then my roommate came out to find out what was so funny.
Glad I wasn’t drinking my coffee at the moment or I would have had a coffee-flavored keyboard too. Well, actually, a fried laptop.
Glad you weren’t in the middle of surgery with a scalpel in your hand.
Taco: “Hey, where’d all that blood come from? Better get me a coffee mug and a rag.”
[irl corey]
Ok, I’ve written a raft of reference letters; I’ve been used as a reference almost beyond enumeration. In all of those, oh, call it a hundred, hundred-fifty, references, I’ve only been called to confirm this twice from the private sector, and under ten times in the public sector.
Makes the “importance” of such things seem more than some reduced, it does.
What DoL allows a person to say about employees is rather strict as well.
Make a thinking person wonder why, unless it is a scheme by the Dunder-Mifflen types to keep sales of dead tree folios up . . .
[/corey]
Been there, done that.
Depending on your [insert location here], any reference response beyond “NO COMMENT” can be grounds for a lawsuit
CaptnMac = please stop telling people how old I am.
Huh. The DoL must make the rule more strict than what a defense to defamation would be in the context of statements to potential employers. [corey-ish] In defamation, you can say you had a duty to the public good (or something, I’m still working on nailing down defamation) to be forthright in your recommendation to a potential employer. [/corey-ish] Employment law isn’t on the bar so I can’t speak beyond that. Although I just took employment law last semester, but the class didn’t cover issues like statements made to potential employers in the context of recommendations. We talked more about rights on the job and the limited scope of wrongful termination.
I hate Corey ish. It’s much too anal [pun] and wants to correct me even when I’m being minty. Just glad I didn’t step in it.
I find no indication, past or present, to the best of my knowledge, information, and/or belief, that I have ever guessed, surmised, or speculated upon the age of the poster referenced as “Artsy.”
But, it is Saturday.
For Bridgete, DoL has defined that an employer may state the following, dates of employment, last title*, and whether or not the employee would be re-hired**.
Any other declaration is held to be discriminatory or prejudicial. And “stompable” (six-league boots, not Parliment Funkadelic) by the local EEOC/DoL office.
Which means one must be very careful in “letters of recommendation ” and even in some “letters of introduction” any more.
_______________
*The name of employee’s position, “Clerk”, “associate”, “deputy chief assistant to VP”, etc. really needs to be spelled out in a Company manual, as case law exists where the title given, post-employment, was prejudicial, or may have indicated demotions or other punitive actions.
**Conditions of that re-employment cannot be stated, such as restitution of embezzled funds, ice storms in Perdition, geometric improvements in cogitation, etc. By the same token, one need not say that the employee would only be rehired as an entry-level employee (saying so being actionable).
This has turned into deep, deep, deep water, driven by lawyers employed in legislation and at the bench and practiced by persons barely able to spell lawyer with a spell-check.
Wow, fascinating. Thanks!
Fascinating it definitely is.
Snark-worthy in huge volumes as well (pun intended if one wishes).
Labor and Employment Law is generally written as if all employers had 2000-1500 employees. The details, when such law is applied to the 80% of employers who have 250 or fewer employees (and 70% of that 80% have 25 or fewer) winds up in CFR as the result of a mix of administrator fiat and stare decisis. Which does not make for uniform, or even logical application.
And, I should not harp on the burdens of having to keep track of thousands of rules and regs and ordinances and the like to the level being a solon of legal scholarship. Quite a number of these rules are “written in blood” in the very real pain and suffering of actual people done very badly.
Other side of the bar, send me a note on f/b and I can share some of the more peculiar ways this winds up in application. I dare not on this side, you do not need such a seed of illogic sewn.
Arrgh, To Whoms e’ may be a’ Concernin’
Tae they w’haft these Presents ‘n’ Scroll come a greetin’ Be ye advised thar Sparky presentin’ be animate and all, nae sae scurvy a cur as would be foun’ ina average ‘arbor flop’ouse. Spark be able t’breate on a reg’glar basis, and only reek a wee bit upwind. Arrgh, he be knowin’, mostly, which end t’put the grog ‘n’ vittles, and the t’other end what whens tae be done. Sparky tis fair at ‘is letters an’ ciphers ae maest wi’ a hook, e’en wi’ all ‘is fingeres beint thar. Dinnae ‘ee worry, ‘e’s not ae much a waste ae air or space ae the aver’git pox’d tar.
Sign’it, Sincerely, y’r humble ob’t Servant
Cap. Wllm. Boneey (deceased)
Now we have recommendation letters written by zomb…
Oh, speaking of zombies, I was listening to my iPod the other day, and this Cranberries song came on and I was reminded that there was this one word I never could figure out when trying to sing along…I glanced at the title, thinking I’d look up the lyrics later, and it’s called Zombie. As I listened, I realized that was the word I couldn’t figure out. I instantly recalled the zombie meme and started laughing to myself…alone, on the sidewalk. I’m pretty sure some people thought I was crazy. Not that thinking that is too far from the truth.
I worry only about the people who think they’re completely sane for those are the ones who are truly insane. Shouldn’t you be studying for the bar?
I am. Occasional breaks are necessary for (relative) sanity.
Well, invoking deceased Pirate captains would be the work of shades, shees, or ghosties, rather than the living dead proper.
With some allowance for misspelling calling up banshee or kelpie or shonnies being like to having the etheral versions of the living dead plague a person.
Only thing worse than zombie infestation being a plague of ghost zomb
O.o Scottish zombies! Do they wear the kilts and if so does that slow them up or make them speedier than the average zombie? Either way I’m going to go listen to “Aim for the Head” again.
Hey I was able to write the entire word zomb…
Aren’t they Irish? Either way, I too was able to write the entire word zomb….
If Irish, it would be O’Zomb…
Scottish is MacZomb… or McZomb…
Fast food would be Big Mac Zomb…
Hope that clears up the ethnicity discussion.
My food has never turned anyone into Zomb…*
*this may not be true
A recommendation letter for Sparky in haiku form –
Dear Educator;
Mister Sparky is a fool
but he has money.
Alternative haiku –
Recommendation:
Hire not the Sparky slimebag.
Has no moral guide.
“A 2” just makes me think of Lawrence Welk.
Some-a-body turn off-a da bubbles.
Sarajean, your sidhe magic is till working! You are well on your way to winning the third quarter Don’t Suck-off! Punchity punch punch!
Ouchity ouch ouch!
Ahh, it hurts so good.
Please ma’am, may I have another?
Not until tomorrow, probably. 8)
G’Night, Corey-on-Ish!
This is a test of a new email. Patience…
And again…
And a third…
How about now?
You look wonderful in all four Archy.
Thank you, Grampdaddy, how kind of you to say so. I was testing out a new email and thought I’d sneak all my mistakes in early on Sunday morning hoping no one would notice. Should have known you would be up early.
Comfortingly, a radiology tech and a radiologist are far from the same thing. A radiologist is a physician.
Off topic – but has anyone else noticed that a large percentage of people on YSaC have feline themed avatars? Not wanting to be left out, I’ve changed my avatar to a kitty as well.
That is all. Carry on.
*pets kitty*
We were taken over by the cat-avatar mafia earlier in the week. Some posters are still under the spell. I was able to escape after only a few days, because moose are so much bigger than cats, and robot moose are especially sneaky.
I can’t believe NO ONE caught the Terry Pratchett reference in the title of this post!!! Good job to who ever posted this!! High five to the fellow fan!
I not only caught it, but showed up just to congratulate the Llama-nun on her taste in anachronistic universes. (All Hail the Llama-nun, who verily doth reside in Bad Ass!) However, Windrose and Smedley both got it mid-page, so we’re both late to the party.
And Nanny Ogg could certainly make an innuendo or two out of my comment, I’m sure.
*Wanders away singing “An ostrimu has a knob on the end, knob on the end, knob on the end…”*
I came running down to the end of the block – er, comments forum – to congratulate the Great Panjumdorum Titleist on just such impeccable taste. Obviously he/she not only reads voraciously but has learned the art of quotation which I had assumed was lost post-Austen. Bravo!
Personally I find the commentary here as funny as the original posts (with a side order of wit and erudition).
*goes back to lurking and snickering*
Bard Judith, I hearby command you to comment more often! Please? 8) We have a bunch of Pratchettists in the group. Welcome to the other side.
Dang, this is a quiet Sunday! One delurked and one hired help. I will personally give coffee slices to anyone who comments today! And you will automatically be in the box.
Oh! Pick me! I’ve never been in the box before!
Not that I ever deserve it, but whatever.
I’ll take a hazelnut-mocha slice, if you have any.
*enters lounge pulling a red wagon carrying a bag of gourmet organic bird seed, (bottles of) champagne, pitcher of freshly-squeezed orange juice, wasabi/soy almonds, chaise lounge with fluffy cushion, and suntan lotion (SPF 30)*
Bring on Sunday. I’m ready!
I wanna sit next to Archie!
Lots of room here. I brought plenty to share! 😀
And on this day, years ago, Smedley, with SJs guidance, did finally figure out the whole Gravatar thing, and it was good.
And I have just enough commas for a boy my age.
Our first look at the adorable puppy!
Oh, and if you could write my essay for ethics class, that would be great, too.
Dear Sirs,
I am so bad at what I do that I can’t get a real letter of recommendation, so stupid I can’t take a hint, and so unethical that I want to cheat to get around that. Please help me obtain a position where I’m reponsible for sick and vulnerable people’s health and safety.
Sincerely,
Your ailing aunt’s nightmare.
You’re hired! Please report to the Oregon State Hospital in Salem, Oregon, circa 1962. Must be willing to perform lobotomies and electroshock therapy.
Did anyone get what I was referencing? Or is everyone thinking “What the hell is he talking about?”
Why, yes, I am very bored and have nothing better to do.
It made me think of One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, was I close?
Correct. Very good!
As luck would have it, I happen to be CEO of several companies: Prevaricators Inc., Bogus Testimonial Outlet, Rent-An-Unscrupulous-Hack, You Pay/We Say and Dirty Deeds Done Not So Cheap. Which letterhead would you like?
Oh, I’ll take Bogus Testimonial Outlet for $5000, please!
Smedley, happy anniversary! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Honest John!
*Worst Elvis imitation ever*
Uh… Ouchy… Ouchy very much…