YSaC, Vol. 688: In your face, Dawkins!
metal patio items/house gods
My tennants move out leaving a lot of metal /patio items on the back yard come and get it anything that is there is for free,first come firs serve.we also have furniture,kitchen gods ,rugs,a 52 inc tv it wont turn on is free too, two sofa,one sectional two dresser kitchen gods,chritmas decoration ,3 rugs including a persian, computer speakers,One big TV.two barbecue pit, and more
call me at ###-###-####
I will be there today and tomorrow
first come first serve.
I will sale some items for a cheap price but most of them are free.
You know, man’s search for faith in an uncertain world has been an ongoing struggle for millennia. (I don’t care WHAT Firefox says, that IS the correct spelling of “millennia”) The quest to understand the nature of the divine has encompassed the logical reasoning of Saint Augustine, the mysticism of the gnostics, and the nihilism of Nietzsche and Sartre.
Where can we find meaning in a seemingly empty and hostile universe? How can we come to a personal revelation that makes some sort of sense in today’s increasingly confusing and shrill media landscape? In short, how can one ever hope, realistically to find God?
Oh, wait. Found ’em on Craigslist. Never mind.
Thanks for the spiritual awakening, Courtney!
Oh, almighty Frigidarius! I am but your humble servant of the kitchen! I am not worthy! I am not worthy!
Now I shall pray.
Dear God in the Kitchen, I would be totally jazzed if you could fill up with the cream cheese with chives, so I don’t have to bug someone to go to the store and get it. Oh, and milk too.
Amen
Bees be upon you.
I found a Fridgidarius!
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/File:Fridgidarius.jpg
I had no clue that existed. But now that I do, I find my post much funnier.
I certainly need the kitchen gods – I’ve been concerned about what to do with my frequent burnt sacrifices.
My question is: which Tennants is he asking to move out and leave all of this stuff?
David Tennant, duh! Now that he’s been replaced, his landlord clearly doesn’t want him anymore…
I think he’s a better Doctor than the new guy, IMO.
Oh, I don’t know about that. I was really skeptical about Mr. Smith as the Doctor, but I’ve been enjoying this season a lot. Of course, it could be because I think the writing is better. I loved Tennant, though, he’s a fabulous actor.
No! Daleks in primary colours, looking as though they’re about to teach me my ABCs are NOT cool. Though will admit liking new Dr despite him being Not.A.Tennant.
BUT as Camille already pointed out the lares/penates connection, I present what I hope is a linkety to Ten and Donna as kitchen gods.
This is why I heart this site. Literature, classics, fantasy geekery and coffee tips. All in one snarkily wrapped package. 🙂
Meh, the new Daleks are wierd, but at least I can tell them apart now. They’ve changed so much from the first few episodes. You used to be able to defeat them with a cloak and then push them over.
Hey, where has Ten been, anyway?
Was wondering if his Tardis was broken.
Free Tardis parts if you do not anger the the kitchen deities? Dang, if only I was not headed to Houston!
Ten Been?
Ben Ten?
I have a whole thesis on the similarities.
Kitchen God? I assume they mean the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Ramen.
Yum! Homemade Noodley Goodness.
Ramen, eh? Would that be as opposed to varelse?
Wait about five years, you will learn, as almost all collegians typically do, of the miracle which is ramen.
Just when you think it’s safe to make an innocent sci-fi reference…
BTW: I look differnt becuase I’m away in Roanoke, VA. We’re visitng relations.
Watch it, I think you could be excommunicated from the First YSaC Church of Clothespin Jeebus of Latter-Day Not.A.Lions for such sacrilege.
As Barista Queen of the First YSaC Church of Clothespin Jeebus of Latter-Day Not.A.Lions, I can say that we welcome members of all faiths, no matter how wrong and misguided they are. In fact, we have a special refreshments table set up, with Kool-Aid specially made for the blasphemous non-believers.
It’s almond-flavored.
By the way, I also want to be the first to claim the 52 inch TV that doesn’t work. I never* watch TV, and I’m tired of people asking why I don’t have a big screen**. The “doesn’t turn on” set would be perfect!
*ALMOST completely true.
**I don’t like to talk about the size of my screen. Let’s just leave it that I’ll put my screen up against Taco’s “Rod of Wonder” anytime.
*Wow, that didn’t come out right*
Grampdaddy, are you by any chance what would be referred to as “an old coot”?
Astrognash, are you by any chance what would be referred to as “a young whippersnapper”?
Oh, umm, yeah, I probably would be. T’will be entering into my 3rd score of years shortly. However, as I tell my childrens – “I may get older, but I refuse to grow up.” They agree that I have proven my immaturity frequently.
Touché, Grampdaddy. Touché.
And God Bless You for that, Grampdaddy!
I’ve given my children strict orders that if I ever grow up they’re to take me out to the woods and leave me for dead.
I think, no I know, they’d do it, too.
Touche’? Heck, I never even looked at her!
*sits in corner, pondering, “Perhaps I should change my name to ‘Touche’Magic’…*
“Why tough signior? Why tough signior?”
“Why tender juvenile? Why tender juvenile?”
CJ – and you also! I’m also trying to convince them to put me into a large ‘Hefty’ bag out at the curb on trash day, when my time finally comes.
May we both find ourselves in the woods together – we can search for for not.a.lions and trucks with bees together…
Dear Isaac – Thank you for bringing some much needed Shakespearean culture to this discussion. It is always good to know that you and Capn can elevate the mental age of the rest of us to somewhere above 3rd grade.
I am always happy to bring the highbrow literary references. That’s my job, y’know.
Now, I find I keep thinking of our dear Astro as being Joey Logano.
Which is likely apt given the #20 driver resides over in Concord NC.
But equally inapt for Mr Logano being four years’ older than Astro, too. (And for Astro only having caused accidental damage to the odd computer monitor, not wrecking orange cars at over 150mph.)
Grampdaddy: That Hefty bag might work, but what if you’re not bound for glory, but to that other place you would not choose? 😉
Eclecticblue –
Other place? – Yonkers??
Grampdaddy, not yet being in your third score puts you some years short of your 40th birthday. And since my darling wife has already had hers, I refuse to call anyone who hasn’t met their 40th an old coot.
[corey]Sorry Dear Maureen, a score is 20 years (think of A. Lincoln – “Four score and 7 years ago….) as opposed to a decade (10 years)[/corey]
So, that would put me at reaching 60 shortly and, when compared to Astrognash, that makes me an ‘old coot’.
I know what a score is. Your first score is your first 20 years, your second score is your next 20, and so forth. So if you are still in your second score, you aren’t 40 yet. When you turn 60, you will have completed three score and be in your FOURTH score, thereby sounding really old to someone who doesn’t know the score.
Maureen, who doesn’t know the rules of the game, but keeps score anyway. My only option, because nobody’s asked me to give away the score in a while now. Maybe that’s because last time I didn’t cut my fingernails, and therefore there was scoring. Next time I’ll wear scoring pads.
Ah… but Gramp… you said that you were about to ‘enter’ your third score (41-60).
I just can tell… you’re older than I am, and I’m exiting my second score of life.
But luckily for us all, your mental and emotional age is much, much…. much younger. 9…10? Young enough that potty humor is still hilarious. 🙂
*ouch* stop with the froggies, I bruise easily
Sorry folks, four score is 80 years (four score and 7 years was 87 years before Lincoln’s Gettysburg address, when the nation was founded). Therefore, three score is 60 years, with or without catmath….. The difference is that a “score” denotes the completion of twenty years, not one through 20.
D*76nit… forgot that explanation from class years ago… always gotta be the teacher doncha?
Let me just say, I don’t deserve that ‘F’. Can I do some extra credit to make up for it?
[corey]Actually, ‘score’ is a tally of twenty, such as achieving 20 points and placing one tally mark on the record sheet [/corey]
Not so much always gotta be the teacher as having it beat into me by MY 4th grade teacher – literally – the ruler on the knuckles method of education.
*Passes Lolly a vodka and lime in companionship, changes ‘F’ to ‘A’*
Can you call it a curtain instead? Screen just gives me some horrific nightmares.
Thanks.
My curtain of compulsion?
His drapery of desire?
or
Awning of Awareness
Partition of Perfection
Shroud of Secrecy
Shield of Savoryness – (on second thought… no)
This needs to stop before I run out of mind bleach.
Astro ordered more brain bleach last week. It’s under the red table, just bow in reverence to the kitchen god before taking a jug.
Bewbtube of Bounty?
I do like “Shield of Savoryness”, Limelolly. Perhaps we’ll put it to a vote.
You are the SnarkMaster today Gramdaddy.
😉
Grampdaddy with his 52 inch Shield of Savoryness….
hmm, what’s the pixel quality of that? 🙂
Limelolly – difficult to tell. According to CL poster, it won’t power up….
Dear Landlord:
We, the recent tenants of your dwelling, feel it necessary to contact you regarding one item left behind.
The kitchen god.
You see, we’ve relocated to a lovely house of death that reeks of blood – it’s perfect! And after acquiring a sadistic/sensual dolly from eBay (it was a steal), we find that she is in much need of a kitchen god to satisfy her insatiable appetite for sprinkled kitties.
Please return said item, as quickly as possible.
Thank you,
Your Former Tennant,
David
CJ, what probability is it that the culinary idol is a front-yard residing, concrete cabezza?
[corey] In ancient Rome, the household gods were known as lares and penates. [/corey] And I’m sure they do not take kindly to being sold on Craiglist. Chances are good that they will exact an awful revenge: the seller will soon be infested with a swarm of angry bees, or a pack of hypno-dogs, or a bevy of bad puns, or something.
Well, they aren’t actually being sold. The ad says most of it is free.
Does that make this a ‘missionary outreach’?
Depends on the position they take on this.
And how big their outreach actually is. They need a web page with a massive link to be truly effective.
You always want to make sure you see eye-to-eye with your missionary outreach.
No thanks, SJ, I don’t want ANYONE’s outreach in my eye. Particularly if it’s about to firs serve.
You’ve got something in your eye. It looks like…
*cleans glasses, then squints at screen*
Is that a ferret foot?
“First come, firs serve”
I see. If I rock up late, the firs will be busy serving someone else?
And what kind of firs are they? Douglas? Norwegian?
Well, judging from the way that they’ve been pining for the fjords, I think they’re probably Norwegians.
Pining for the Fjooooords? He’s bloody demigoded!
I want the one sectional two dresser kitchen gods! I’ve been looking for a practical deity that offers different storage options.
And a merry chritmas to all!
And a merry chritmas it will be, sarajean, if i get there in time for the decoration.
Hope it’s mintey.
I know I have birds on the brains, but those metal bits look like a cage of some sort. Hmmmm.
I though they looked like some sort of shelving unit that had been taken apart, but I like the cage idea better.
It is a cage.
An Extreme Fighting cage.
I hope there are no other ‘surprises’ in the backyard!
Ah, I see Taco’s box is back from the shop, and he’s in it. Er. Uh. No, I’ll leave it.
Since we have no real topic anyway, for you connoisseurs of the terpsichorean muse:
One NiTe 0nly
Inappropriate Cat Touching
opens for
Ginzu Cat Tao
(formerly Neko Ginzu Waza)
May the kuriya kami be pleased.
Do they sing ‘Scratching The Bedpost’, or ‘Meowing When The Sun Goes Down?’
Because those are my favorites.
The Crazy Cat Lady Starter Set is doing a lovely rendition of “There’s A Cat On The Porch!” right now. Seems to be more of an interpretive dance number, what with the running back and forth to different windows and “digging” on the glass, but there is a bit of hissing and growling involved.
Personally, I really like Inappropriate Cat Touching’s new hit, “Don’t Spank the Kitty”, especially the refrain”
“Ooh, Ooh, Ooh.
Oooh, Oooh, Oooh,
Oooooooooooooooooooh, Yeah!
Dear Llamanun/Powers That Bee,
I’m trying to switch from the mobile site to the desktop site, so I can get the nifty comment threading… I tried to click on the little “mobile site on” switch, but nothing happened… I tried to click on the link at the very bottom that says “Switch to our desktop site, and it reloaded the page… To the mobile site (it overrode the option?). Just thought you might want to know, if this isn’t already a known problem. I’m running the stock browser on Android 2.1, in case that makes a difference.
Huh. It’s doing the same thing on mine. I’ll look at those settings.
Awesome! I could use a house God, and a kitchen God. I wonder if they help keep my house clean, and help me think of what to cook for meals, and help me cook?
Ditto on that one! Let me know if you come across a good deal 🙂
I have no gods kitchen or otherwise, and those sneaky elves keep escaping from the basement. :sigh:
Slave labor is so hard to come by these days.
The elves stick around longer if you don’t leave socks lying around. True fact.
No, I’m pretty sure you have to actually GIVE them the socks before they run off… or else, how would they do your laundry?
Ah, there’s my problem.
I hate not having matching socks, but I could never find the corresponding mate.
I see now those elves skated out with them. So the dryer really isn’t a black hole?
This goes with yesterday’s coffee thread, but then again, we almost always have a coffee/tea/water with significant impurities thread going. 8)
http://www.daniellecorsetto.com/archive.php?today=954&comic=1
Nice! Another comic to add to my ever-growing list.
Speaking of yesterday’s never-ending coffee thread, I tried the caramel-in-the-coffeepot thing Taco recommended yesterday this morning (I had no caramels so I used Rolos instead) and it is very good!
Rolos….. not just for snacking, anymore.
Better buy the big bag next time.
I see our favorite little gordito fairy gets another punchity punch. Pinto beans.
Guacamole
Don’t forget the sour cream!!
And the salsa.
the flour tortillas
Margaritas
Official Punchity Punch Punch, Taco. You wear it well.
G’Night, Roanoke!
Goodnight, deity. (if you really exist)
“3 rugs including a persian, computer speakers,One big TV”
I’ve head of persian rugs, but what the hell are computer speakers rugs and One big TV rugs?
will prayer to the kitchen god make you a better cook, or will they come and clean your kitchen? hope i dont have to wait until critmas, whenever that is.