YSaC, Vol. 685: Joe Camel WISHES he were this cool…
In this day and age, it’s important to have the appropriate amount of “bling” for one’s camel. Gone are the days when you can be taken seriously riding a threadbare old camel down to the mall adorned by a vinyl saddle with tin fittings. No, you need a touch of class. Fortunately, this person can help:
Camel Saddle – Egyptian hand made – $80
Grandma purchased this camel saddle at the pyramids in Egypt and paid a fortune to ship it home.
Yes, that is real brass.
Yes, that is real leather.
Hand made in Egypt.
The real deal. Full size camel saddle.
It’s in perfect condition.
Cash.
Please use the words SADDLE or Egypt in your email response so I know you are not a SPAM BOT. Thanks.
Obviously, we can trust this person. After all, he’s selling off grandma’s priceless souvenirs, so he must be a good guy. But just to be sure, let’s check the pictures.
Wow. That’s even more awesome than I thought! I’m going to have the coolest camel on the BLOCK!
Thanks for the link, Diane!
I hope that’s not Grandma. :-0
No, I think that Sparky’s grandma found Nefertiti’s tomb and all she brought back was the head.
I think “Grandma Scully” had some work done. Just look at those cheekbones, they could take someone’s eye out!
Oooh! I want the moldy-green-skull-thingy! I have a table that it would look perfect on!
It would be perfect to serve guacamole on!
Tuck a couple of cherry tomatoes into the vacant eye sockets and you’re all set.
It compliments the Not.A.Lionel. perfectly.
I have a couple of tomatoes for you, SJ!
I think the poster is hoping to saddle unsuspecting CL buyers with the various bits of crepe Grandma left him in her will.
[corey]I’ve stared and stared…what is the Hudson can?[/corey]
I’m guessing it’s either a fire extinguisher or some sort of sprayer.
*Google break*
Probably a sprayer, I can’t find a Hudson fire extinguisher.
I *think* it is a fire extinguisher. If so, it would be a lame safety camel. Instead of flaming skulls, it would have skulls with a few lingering whisps of smoke. Not nearly so cool.
Agricultural sprayer. With lovely residue from herbicide or insecticide (or just some liquid fertilizer). Hard to tell at this point. And you’d have to touch the thing to take it to have it tested.
So THAT explains the mummy’s curse – good old DDT.
Hey, no hating on DDT, the powder was near inert enough for human consumption.
It was one of the least toxic to humans pesticides ever made.
(The oil used to fog it, on the other hand . . . )
And, I know dear old Rachel wrote with great passion and all, but some of the predicted results could never be proven in real life (and had rather a hit-or-miss record in repeatable labratory testing).
Now, it’s that’s heptachlor residue, well, Rach was well right and correct on that.
I want a “My grandma went to Egypt and all I got was this green skull and a Hudson spray can” T-shirt.
I’ve been saving it for you until you were old enough to appreciate it. She said,”Give it to that man over there…”
Tea out the nose is not good! *sigh* I miss Grandma.
I’ve heard those camel traders are fast talkers; but damn, they sure pulled one over on ol’ Grandma.
That or there is one weird-looking camel over in Egypt.
Certainly nothing I’d want to ‘sit on’ in those pictures.
SJ is correct, it is a sprayer. However, in keeping with the subject of the post, it is a critical accessory for the well appointed camel saddle. Assuming the sprayer has not been used for toxins, you can fill it with water and extend your camel-mileage by periodically spraying into the beast’s mouth. Use of toxin-containing sprayers may reduce your mileage to zero. Your mileage may vary, optional accessories shown. Professional driver on closed course – do not try this at home.
Everybody knows that the only way to extend your camel-mileage is to brick him.
That’s true, but only for the initial fill-up for the trip…
Save a horse, ride a camel.
Yay, I’m right!
WHOOO!!!
That is all.
The green skull is actually a cheese server that has spoiled. Cleaned up (think pressure washed) and it is a vintage not.a.lionel.
I don’t have anything witty to add, but as I was sitting here thinking “Saddle? Huh,” my coworker came up and falsetto-shrieked “What is thaaat?!?” at the green skull. Awesome.
YSAC: keeping my coworkers on their toes since 2009.
You should have shrieked back, “It’s my graaaaaaammmaaaaaaa!!! Stop making fun of heeeerrrr!!!”
I am assuming you simply cut eyes at her and went back to work. Someone who screams at the sight of pottery doesn’t deserve your acknowledgement.
Nah, she’s cool. While for some reason 8) she’s not tempted to visit the site, she approves of its title, and doesn’t rat when I’m on it (I extend the same courtesy to her).
dan: I love you. This post is brilliantly written. I laughed and laughed and laughed.
Nice job Dan – think you could GIMP a chickollo onto the picture of the skull?
Chickollo – did I miss that in the discussion two days ago, or did you just make that up?
Ummm – you caught me. I made it up based on the chicken and the piccolo discussion a couple days ago. I don’t know,it just seemed right….. Would a chilute work better for you? I’m flexible on this.
Are you kidding? I think it’s hilarious… I was worried I had missed a meme.
The idea of a “flexible chilute” has given me the giggles.
I’m not sure what it is, but it sounds dirty.
And also kind of tasty.
pulletto and figgallo were also invoked.
I have the urge to say: “Darn tootin’ ” to the thought of Flexible Chilute.
SJ – “The idea of a “flexible chilute” has given me the giggles.
I’m not sure what it is, but it sounds dirty.”
Only dirty if you’re doing it right – for reference, see: Chapter 6, “Chicka Sutra”.
Glad to be of help….
Would that be the chapter before or after Forrest Gump temptations?
*takes notes for future kiss-up emergencies*
Don’t forget to mention that … let’s call him/her/it “the Recipient”, appears malnourished and suffering from a darkening of the skin due to exposure to ultraviolet radiation. (Rapid movement of the eyelashes is recomended only when Recipent is of the opposite sex.)
Of course I’m not a spambot.
Now please inform me whether this camel saddle has been sprinkled or neutered.
Sprayed (lightly).
.. flour the bottom and sides and pour batter
… and bake at elebenty internets for 3-4 bedrooms or until toothpick inserted in center comes out minty.
Serve atop a terra cotta bust of Not.a.Lionel Richie, or use as a sammich filling.
Stop, please, you’re making me hungry. :p
Perfect mine hors to go with a cocktail.
Question: If a cockhorse is a toy rocking horse (per one definition), why is a cocktail a mixed drink?
I don’t know, but there is a flashing image in my mind of a tailfeather from a rooster.
*whispers fatherly advise to Astro, “Be very careful using the word ‘flashing’ with this group”*
Cat Cooking?
[culture corey] Having done a fair amount of amateur study of Egyptology, I’m thinking those skulls look more Central- or South American than Egyptian, insofar as they correctly reflect art from any actual culture.[/culture corey]
I want to see the switcheroo ad: the one with the “Mange green skull and antique extinguisher set!!11! One of a kind!!1!” headline. I picture readers staring at a camel saddle and saying, “Skull of … what?!? – and a new branch of cryptofauna/cryptozoology suddenly flourishing.
I think that skull is Early School-Art-Project. I bet you, the back is either an ashtray or a planter. They’re known for their work in what is known as “gloopy glazing” and “make an ashtray for everyone, whether they smoke or not”. It’s characteristic of the culture. This is a very good example.
My grandparents had this awesome* skull ashtray that simultaneously intrigued and freaked me out when I was a child. I don’t smoke but I want it – no idea what happened to it. There was a hole in the lower back of the skull – which was (the skull) smaller than a newborn, so it wasn’t overly realistic – where you rested the cigarette, and the smoke flowed out through the empty eye sockets and the mouth.
Pure class, that.
*to a kid, anyway
The skull makes me think of the Snow Miser. The cheesy grins are the same.
AWWW Sparky, and to think I sold my friend (blonde, small, blue eyes, female) for a camel just last year in Egypt and have been waiting for elebenty ages to afford just the right type of saddle to grace it (they’re very fussy in this neck of the woods on animal saddles – Epsom UK the Derby happens this Saturday). *back to Leatherwork 101*
Yes, that is real rust.
Yes, that is real dust.
Custom made by sitting in my garage for 20 years.
(Mine is clearly superior. It rhymes.)
Some high school’s production of Hamlet has likely just skyrocketed in production quality now that this thing is gone.
Alas, poor York, I…ewww, this thing is gross!
It’s Yor-icky, all right.
***For Sale***
One slightly used Lionel Richie Camel Cheese Flambé set.
Includes sprayer to extinguish camel cheese flambé.
Full disclosure:
Due to an overzealous use of flaming cheese, Lionel Richie now looks more like Richard Pryor, circa 1980.
Oh, man… I shouldn’t read this stuff at work. I was filling out a card cancellation form and where it said “reason for reissue” I almost put “overzealous use of flaming cheese”.
**Cue Raider’s March**
Among Summer 2010’s upcoming blockbusters:
“When an aged Indiana Jones attempts to sell a saddle on Craigslist, he realizes (too late) his mistake in file-naming when he discovers that the included picture is of a Crystal Skull! The Geriatric Dr. Jones now must fight off a horde off Zombie-Nazis and Zombie-Commies from his past in an attempt to save his own life, and, more importantly, his hat, in…
Indiana Jones and the Zombie’s Curse”
What do zombies say when they curse?
I hope you realize that we’re gonna lose Taco again, and it will be all your fault Astro, cuz’ you brought up the zomb
I shoot, I forgot not to mention said zomb
*”I” should be “Oh,”. Don’t know how that managed to slip past me for so long.
Oh, and by the way, everybody wish me luck. Exams start tomorrow, and continue until Tuesday. (Actually, I should be popping in more often, as there’s a) No Homework and 2) We get out at 11:30/Noonish as opposed to the regular 2:30.)
Good luck for exams! Enjoy the temporary euphoria which comes as you knock each one off. 🙂
Spelling mistakes are allowed when dealing with zomb
Oh, exams, how fun! I have mine in French tomorrow, which will be [sarcasm]fuuuuuuun[/sarcasm]
I have tests in band and gym on Friday, though, and get out at noon. I’m kind of upset that I need to waste my time going to school for that at all.
My order of exams: Health, English I (Honors), World History, and then Band.
Astro, I think you should be able to submit your comments on YSaC in lieu of the English exam and just cruise on through. Do remember to include the effects of French Prevential during the World History exam – should be good for extra credit.
Good luck with exams! :<)
Unfortunately, English is the only one in which I have to face… a standardized test.
Fortunately, that means it’s loads easier than what Mrs. Letts would throw at us if she made it. Because, being standardized, it’s not even an honors-level test.
I LOVE standardized tests! One of the questions on my pre-AP bio exam was about how the human body maintained homeostatis, one of the supplied answers being “by producing more melanin when excercising.” I thought to myself, Well, wouldn’t that be a great way to get a tan. Go to the gym and ride the eliptical for an hour.
only if THIS gets to be in the movie:
http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/151/8/f/FurFright_Llama_Chainsaw_by_o_kemono.jpg
A drawing my friend Alex did (he also drew the rat in my icon, I just colored it)
Yes, that is a Llama with a chainsaw.
That’s the Zombai Lama!
I’ve heard of him – he’s the deity who hangs out in Shangra-L.A. (not EVER to be confused with our very own Llamanun, (blessed be her Llama-ness) who hangs out with her many followers here at YSaC).
Barnyard Halloween, Michael reincarnated in fur. Those pigs and chickuns have laughed for the last time.
*awesome picture, btw
So maybe it’s just be, but up there in the “Don’t Suck” box, I read this… “Also — sprinkle kittens, by Accident!” and thought “Someone accidentally made sprinkle kittens? …Maybe they accidenally sprinkled the kittens?”
Haha, I noticed that too! Then I wondered to myself, “Self, how long has Accident been waiting to do something which can then be attributed to them, causing the amusing ‘by Accident’ situation we see here?”
Then I got coffee and everything got less confusing. I think.
Accident needs to send that image to the Not.A.Lion page, too.
The rule still works:
It’s me or the avacado-green skull Sparky!
It’s me or the antique insecticide sprayer Sparky!
I can’t really see why one would want to get rid of the camel saddle. It goes great with the midevil armour couch and THE table.
Is it a meme yet?!
No, but it’s an
officiallyaccepted part of CatMath:The Bianchi Sound Postulate
We could write a textbook! What would we call it?
CatMath 101 x spinach toothpaste and some lines and stuff.
I dare you to post an ad on CL to sell:
“One Catmath Texbook, slitely usd, mostley minety. 20 FIRM OBO.
This book are new. It cald “CatMath 101 x spinach toothpaste and some lines and stuff – see related titles at Amazon.com”. I onely red it for times.
Here is a picher of a truck I have. It is fullofbees but rely good and new.”
I’ll take that dare!
http://sacramento.craigslist.org/clt/1772653069.html
As for the Bianchi Sound Postulate: It may get confused with the Bianchi Identity. (Not starring Matt Damon…)
http://mathworld.wolfram.com/BianchiIdentities.html
I’ll take your dare, Jen.
http://sacramento.craigslist.org/clt/1772653069.html
Ok, now I have to explain to my Manager why my keyboard is covered in tea.
Aww, you even put in the picture I was too lazy to find!!!!
Epic, epic win, and +elebenty adores!!! Please tell me you’ll start a forum thread with any replies!
If anyone replies, I’ll be sure to start a thread and split the profits with you. What’s half of OBO?
A chickollo ?
Well an oboe has two reeds, but clarinet is two easty to spelt,
so, Bassoon and mahi mahi sashimi or Contrabassoon with toro nigiri
Bianchi, that are epic. I’m archiving it through pictures/downloading the source code, so that it may continue to exist for all posteriority.
Astro, as the date stamp will tell you, I just clicked the link to the ad, and it has expired. I am so happy you saved it! No matter which body part you did it for. 8)
It appears that whomever that skull once belonged to died happy.
And I like a good happy ending.
Astrognash, please report to the office and present your card! And bring Accident with you. Pronto!
Punchity Punch Punch! Spread it around. 8)
G’Night, Egypt!
Jen and Bianchi Sound (also known as BS): BRAVO! BRAVO! Truly a great example of using your powers for good rather than evil.
Windrose, might I suggest that even if the “Catmath book ad” does not end up in the box, you punch Jen and Bianchi repeatedly. They deserve it. Over and over and over and…
Maybe we should form a gauntlet?
Spanking machine?