YSaC, Vol. 615: D’oh! A deer, a bedazzled deer …
2010 March 24
Deer Feet, gun/coat hanger, (be-dazzled.) – $50
This is a very unique piece, more for a young girls room. It has five deer feet that are used for hanging coats, but could also be used to set a gun on.The feet are painted to rezemble more of a zebra, and each hoof has rhinestones added to the tip. The backboard is black with speckled pink. Also forgot to mention there are five design handkerchiefs hanging from the hooves.Very unique piece, one of a kind, hope you like it!!
Because what young girl wouldn’t love to have a coat/gun rack made out of five bedazzled deer feet?
Thanks, Samantha!
Ick
Double Ick
Beyond Creepy
(But I guess if you hang deer from your swing set, you probably would think this was cool)
Especially if you hollowed out the carcass to make a new swing seat. It would have the same “functional yet frightening” vibe this gives off.
*Groan*
Did you really have to “go there” sarajean? Now I can’t get the vision of Meatloaf out of my head from that Masters of Horror episode called “Pelts”.
Just once I’d like to see some broccoli heads mounted on a wall!
I’m actually raising free range broccoli this year. If they grow nice and big I’ll stuff and mount one for you muddy.
specially for mudslicker, because I had too much time on my hands
http://i727.photobucket.com/albums/ww274/develish1/public%20album/broccolirack.jpg
Taco, I have this vision of you mounting a broccoli and it’s NOT a pretty picture.
Rule #34.
So much for broccoli being considered a wholesome food.
The little tramps.
Of course I’ve got this nice new tablecloth I need to christen…
I dunno dev, that broccoli definitely needs a little BLING dontcha’ think? Those florets are just not speaking to me the way glitter and Swarovski crystals can.
more bling you say, well I don’t normally do bling so much, but here goes….
http://i727.photobucket.com/albums/ww274/develish1/public%20album/broccolirack1.jpg
You subscribe to Rob Zombie’s parenting and crafts magazine, Sarajean? I just saw that in the April issue!
I saw it in Febuary’s Better Homes and Taxidermy. They had a feature article on “101 Unusually Useful Mounts”. It was the same issue with the “101 Neat Feet Ideas”.
Per the usual, the projects I saw recently in Martha Stewart’s Non-Living were deceptively simple-looking, but a bear to make; speaking of which, it was a rug. Turned out nice looking though, and as Martha always says, “It’s a dead thing.”
I had to cancel my subscription to The Zombie’s Home Journal. Every time I opened it it would just mutter “Brains!” and try to eat me.
Sarajean’s articles could lead this thread into quite the yarn of bad jokes.
Gee, that’s never happened before.
semi off-topic
anyone else play Plants vs. Zombies?
Best. Game. Ever.
Okay, besides Super Mario Bros NES
Kill two deermu with one stone:
Clark’s Hooves & Feathers. They specialize in Emu products!
http://www.clarkshoovesnfeathers.com/
And they have mine hors!
Are mine hors miniature horses?
Oh snap! Because I could have sworn they were hors d’oeuvres. Which would have been yummier. “Could I have my mine hors on a cracker please?”
HHFN:
There’s a zombie on your la-awn,
there’s a zombie on your la-awn,
there’s a zombie on your la-awn,
We don’t want zombies on the laaaaawn.
I know your type, tall, dark, and dead,
you want to bite all the petals off of my head,
and then eat the brains of the one who planted me here.
I’m just a sunflower but see
me power an entire infantry,
You like the taste of brains;
we don’t like zombies.
And now, that is stuck in your head.
Emu Oil?
drmk, do we want to know what that’s for?
(Is Dan squeaking?)
Yup, Taco, that’s the song i play on my ghettoblaster when i roll through the hood.
Emu oil is a great moisturizer. A drop or two goes a long way. I bought some years ago when I took a pottery course and the clay really dried out my hands. Emu sausage, on the other hand, wasn’t for me.
(Wherever this ends up, it’s in reply to HHNF) Yes, I LOVE Plants vs. Zombies! I haven’t made it very far, but it truly rocks. 8)
I’m not sure even a double ick does this one justice, maybe a triple or quadruple ick would be more accurate?
It looks like it’s giving me the finger. Or hoof, I guess.
Who in their right mind would put this in a child’s room, much less a girl’s?
“Gee, thanks Dad! Now I have somewhere to keep my Hannah Montana Remington 700 with the pink glitter stock!”
You might be surprised. Taco told me that there was a whole section on the Hannah Montana forums dedicated to “Decorating with Severed Animal Feet”
Apparently that’s the Hannah Rural Montana section.
I don’t think I’ve seen that before. I must go to the wrong Wal-Mart.
There’s a right Wal-Mart?
Sure, there’s one right down the street.
Just remember to keep your hands inside the cart at all times and flash photography is not only permitted but encouraged.
I know I’m late on this, but … There’s an urban Montana?
Isaac, there are a few smallish cities in Montana (I have family there and visited it regularly as a child). Urban Montana is probably at least somewhat equivalent to urban Vermont, if that helps as a point of reference.
So, there’s urban-ish Montana, rural Montana, and seriously undeveloped and unamenitied Montana (the latter being, while not always easy to get to (e.g., no roads, so must fly in) or friendly to humans, sometimes the most beautiful part).
Isaac:
Yes, and it’s not pretty. It’s called Butte and I believe they only attached the “e” on there just to give it a fancy French flair. Then they missed the concept entirely by making the “e” silent.
Mud, I saw a bumper sticker in southern Idaho that said ‘I like it in the Butte’
I almost died laughing. Best insurance claim ever.
I bet it was on a mini-van! Those soccer moms are FREEEeaaaaakkkkyyyy!
Glad to see you were able to accommodate her when you rear-ended her. Happy ending!
Better: semi-truck. I’ll bet he never hears the ‘end’ of it.
Musta’ been a Peterbilt.
I’m more disturbed that Taco knew that.
You should see the Hannah Montana elephant leg dresser I made.
I painted it with that flavored glitter so that when I lick it I taste Strawberries!
Taco just reminded me of a favorite Far Side: elephant in phone booth, with a crutch and leg stump: “They made it into a what?”
I kinda think that these girls would like to have this…
I gonna hazard a guess that amongst our commentators there are a few things hanging on your collective walls that would cause these girls to cringe — show of hands, who has a cat figurine within sight? Personally, as a kid, I always wanted to use figurines for target practice with the pellet gun. Much more satisfying destruction than the styrofoam cups filled with water.
One of these pics is
not like the other
One of these pics
just doesn’t belong…
I sure hope that doe bites that woman’s face off. Thanks *grumble grumble* for sharing BUJ..
The only thing that comes to mind that would make these she-men cringe would be a couple dozen Precious Moments figurines ambushing them from behind a bush.
*Please duck to avoid the red laser light*
Actually I have something they would probably love sitting next to the TV in my office (I work at home). http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=43172524 but mine has candles in it.
I got it at a White Elephant Christmas Party a couple of years ago. I was going to wrap it up to take to last year’s but didn’t go. It will go to this year’s whether I go or not.
It clashes with my long “haired” African mask name Fred.
Since nobody else has said it…
Hey girls! NICE RACKS!
Poor Dancer and Vixen!
Don’t feel bad for them…they look FABulOUUUUUUSSSSSSS!!!!
I don’t know if I would have gone with that color rhinestone. Vixen’s always been an ottom.
He wears one black hoof, covered in rhinestone.
The only thing preventing this from being featured on Regretsy is the fact that it was posted on Craigslist.
Must not let my future in-laws see this. They might think it’s the perfect gift for my daughter. Their new house includes a trophy room with animal heads on just about every wall.
If they don’t have bedazzled hooves, fake eyelashes, or makeup, then I’m not impressed.
Or wigs! WIGS would be AWESOME!!!
If I had a severed animal head, I’d put it in a top hat with a big cigar in his mouth.
I’d also make it say, “Indubidably!” whenever it heard somebody talking around it.
So, basically, you’re thinking your standard talking stuffed animal heads from Country Bear Jamboree, but tarted up a little?
Hehe those silly country bears and their Jamboree.
*Hrrruum* No, totally not the same.
Meredith: Believe me, I was tempted, but I was visiting for a week, and I didn’t want to get kicked out of the house.
I always kind of wanted a mounted head on my wall. But all my exes were light sleepers. I was gonna even give them googley eyes!
Who would have had the googly eyes, Meredith – the mounted heads or your exes? Is that why you broke up?
Lola: uhhhh, the heads. Totally not my exes….or my exes mounted heads. Nope, not thinking that at allll. he…he…he…
That’s what I figured, Meredith, but I was highly amused by the “exes were light sleepers, was gonna give them googly eyes” sentence construction because the possible cause and effect situation there was … weird and nonintuitive, to say the least. Not that that’s anything new for the comments here (much less the OPs).
I want some of whatever these people took that made them think this was a good idea. Because unless they happened upon a deer with five feet, it would take more than one to make this glittering monstrosity. That implies some level of planning. I am now very curious as to what happened to the other three feet.
I’m guessing at least one’s a bong now.
And what is with the handkerchiefs? Were these deer rival gang members?
The other three were painted orange and black in a not.a.lion pattern and hang in the shed out back to hold the spoons, etc. for the moonshine still. They aren’t bedazzled cuz Uncle Billy Bob tends to get distracted by shiny things.
Oh, I bet one was made into a backscratcher.
Another was made into a ball point pen for keeping score in horseshoes (they don’t realize you don’t really keep score in horseshoes).
And the third into a bottle opener that plays the theme song from Born Free every time you use it.
I, too, was wondering either where the other three feet (aren’t they hooves? just wondering) went, or what the deer with the five hooves looked like.
If not a bong, then a holder for a meth pipe, Sarajean.
I think, and I might be wrong (been known to happen) that deer walk on their tippy-toes, like cats. The hoof is the cloven bit on the end (like a toenail) but the foot is the whole thing.
Like I said, I could be wrong, it’s not like I spend a lot of time staring at deer feet.
The three feet are in the yard, of course.
How dare you do real math here?!
I agree, I thought we only allowed cat math in here, which of course means the answer is tuna sammich.
WITCH! WITCH! WITCH, I SAY! They useth the “maths” of the devil, rather than our righteous Cat Match!
He turned me into a newt, he did.
We will need the largest set of scales!
And he didst striken my cattle so they giveth soured cream.
*whispers*
What? I didst not knoweth we hadeth a bull. Why wouldeth the bull giveth soured cream?
*more whispers*
Oh.
I withdraweth my complaint.
What else floats?
Ohmaigawd Sarajean. Everyone that’s procrastinating with me just about died laughing. If we could all give you +1’s, you’d have elebenty.
A duck?
Very small rocks
I got better.
I want to go for a walk . . .
Churches!
I have to go to the feasting on the robins, sloths, orangutang et al;
but, when I get back,
it’ll be
The Holy hand-grenade of Auntie-ottom!
Hoove Tang Clan ain’t nothin to F*ck wit, sarajean. They gonna cutya…cutya hooves off!
One word SJ: Hoofchucks!
It’s like nunchucks, only frightening rather than awesome.
My catulator indicates this is Not.A.Lion-math.
Which is why five-footed deer = bedazzler.
Or why we cerf the net.
I’m happy to learn that it’s a unique piece. That means that after it’s destroyed, there’s no risk to see another of those horrors.
Four little words: Kill it with fire. 🙂
It’s almost worth the $50 just for the opportunity to destroy it.
Then again, you’d also have to shell out another $500 for the priests and holy water.
And whatever fire insurance will cost you. Just because you try and burn it in the back yard doesn’t mean your home will be safe …
Napalm is so much more effective, and it burns just as long and hot as our hatred.
And put in some sparklers!
No reason, I just like sparklers.
No, sadly, anyone who would make one of these, would not stop there.
There’s always more bad craft to be done, ottom it.
There should be at least a matched pair.
‘Cause what’s the point of having just one?
May I briefly express my pedantic outrage at the repeated phrase “very unique”?
Thanks.
UNIQUE MEANS ONE OF A KIND. IT CANNOT BE INTENSIFIED. ANYTHING UNIQUE IS ALREADY AS UNIQUE AS IT CAN BE.
Okay. I had ot get that off my chest.
ot = to
I hate Type-A on Corey-Wednesday!
*sigh*
ot to, brute.
By the way, I was having cookie / cache problems today that kept me from editing my own posts. (And kept me from reading all the comments, for that matter, because I’d keep getting booted off the site after each post I made.)
Hopefully that’s all resolved now.
I was having a cookie problem, too, but I ran out of cache, and they threw me out of the bakery…
Geez, Isaac, I was wondering when you would get around to that. I thought I was going to have to put on my President Bartlet avatar…
That single moment in The West Wing convinced me to watch the show for like two whole seasons.
I’m glad that wasn’t too obscure.
I can’t hear the word “unique” without thinking about that scene. Let alone “very unique” or “extremely unique.”
This was the very rare, conjoined-twin deer of the upper Outer Wetlands Forrest. For years, this doe wandered with the herd, on her five feet, and was thought to bring a special good luck to anyone who happened to see her. Then one day, while running from hunters, she tripped over her own five feet. And the rest is history. Now pay the $50 and I’ll be on my way.
This could be the new ASPCA commercial, with quasi-celebrity endorsement.
Aside from the “ick” factor, there’s the “painted to resemble more of a zebra” factor. These don’t resemble any more.of.a.zebra I’ve ever seen. More.of.a.zebras, like not.a.lions, have stripes.
And I’m not sure what species of zebras have rhinestones on their hooves. Maybe they consider zebras mythical creatures which exist only in our imaginations (and in the haze generated by crack pipes.)
I’m surprised they didn’t say they were unicorn hooves. That would be a magical decorating accessory any young girl would love.
After the weeping stopped and the meds kicked in, of course.
…..and hanging just outside the window…….
Windrose, do you think a little punch would perk Depressy up?
Something tells me the only thing that perks Depressy up is poisoned coffee in his mug-head, but it’s worth a try.
Stealing Bianchi Sound’s punch make Depressy very happy!
Up yours, Depressy!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I’m a schizophrenic,
And so am I?
Bad! Bad Depressy! Back in your cave! Punch, punch, punch!
Reminder to self: Never drink Kool-Aid with Depressy.
But it was DIET! He said it was dieeeettt…..ack….ugh…….aaaaaccckkk…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6wqKb8EUxI
Also forgot to mention we can create coat hangers out of your dear, deceased pet feet. Fido can be your helpful best friend, always!
One step worse than this.
I don’t know, Colleen – making a sweater out of your live pet’s hair doesn’t seem nearly as creepy to me as having dead feet hanging around. I mean, we wear sweaters made of sheep hair, don’t we? Though if your dog-hair sweater got wet, you’d walk around smelling like wet dog for the rest of the day, which is probably not a good thing
For a while I was seriously considering making a scarf out of my cat’s hair, but that was back in my single days, and my friends made me swear not to do it – out of fear that any potential dates would go running away after learning about the scarf. LOL But yeah, on the grand scale of creepiness, hanging feet outrank pet hair any day!
I’ve also considered sending in my cat’s hair to be spun into yarn. Getting it made into yarn is expensive though, and I’m allergic to cats (and yet I have one, go figure) so I wouldn’t really want to wear anything I knitted with it. Then there’s also the wet dog/cat smell factor.
If you made a sweater for your dog out of yarn spun from its own hair, would it be the same as dividing by zero?
Somebody try that and let me know what happens.
It would be like Shaun the sheep wearing a sweater made of his own wool.
Sweet mother, they’ve spun Not.A.Lion yarn!
I must admit, I find it fascinating that I could literally knit a kitten with leftover cat hair.
Were you the one who linked me to the knit a kitten pattern? I’ve made two of those (with yarn, not with cat hair) for my daughter now, and she loves them so much she wants me to knit a couple more so she can have a complete cat family.
Guilty. They are super cute.
Two creepy ass words:
Family Hairloom
And yes, I’ve seen several of these in variuos museums and mansion tours. They always gives me the jeebies. The worst was a tablecloth. *ghehelbleh*
Oh, it should be noted that many of the pieces I’ve seen (including the tablecloth) were made with hair harvested from recently deceased family members as a way to preserve a small part of them.
*hurf*
I’ve seen pins that were a few strands of hair looped and knotted into a design, but … tablecloth?
*runs from room with hand over mouth*
ok, where’s that bleach Lola, I think I need a bucket full after thinking about dead feet and table cloths made of dead peoples hair
That explains why my pin smells like Dippity Doo and Head and Shoulders!
Gee Your Hair Smells Delicious…even after you’re gone!
I could make a fully wardrobe from my man’s hair right now, and still have enough for a pair of drapes.
And it is the hair on his HEAD, you guys! Other than his formerly long, lustrious locks, he can barely grow anything. Poor guy can’t even get a smidge of a beard.
If you do have drapes made, will they match the carpet?
(Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
You could save his combings and fix that.
Ok, that confirms yet again that you’re not my cousin. Her husband is nearly bald.
I wonder if anyone would taxidermy a person’s driving finger into a coathook? ‘Cause if so, I need to change my burial instructions.
I want a key hook that’s a finger, so it always looks like my wall is motioning “C’mere, you!”
Like these?
sarajean: that is unbelievably awesome! “Sold in fours because this importer doesn’t deal in thumbs.”
seems you beat me to it sarajean, I just found these
http://nerdapproved.com/household/finger-hooks/
There’s probably more than one rabbit who is very happy to see this “zebra spangled piece”.
Like the Chick-fil-A cows, the bunnies mottoes’ are: “For good luck, desecrate more deer hooves!”
How Easter appropriate!
I have to wonder if these folks weren’t selling a swingset awhile back. It seems they made use of the normally “useless” carcass parts. But…I didn’t notice the deer having an extra hoof…
But, glad to see their little girl has grown up and moved on! She doesn’t need the trappings of youth anymore. Craigslist is so much easier than a yardsale. And now they can go git her a new gun with the earnin’s.
I read that last word too quickly and thought it said “earrings” and screamed,
“Good God™, you can buy Bambi at Claire’s!?!”
The “Bits of Bambi” collection is right next to the Thumper jewelry boxes.
Oooh! Band name! Bits of Bambi
They could provide the soundtrack for the remake of Pieces of April.
“more for a young girls room…” “more of a zebra…”
They forgot one: “more of a nightmare inducing abomination”.
“more of a nightmare inducing abomination”
For consideration:
This was in someone’s room (hence the handkerchiefs), where are they now?
Just who went in that room, took a look, and said “Hey, I bet we can get $50 for this”?
Someone made this item. They found/had-on-hand taxidermy deer foot forms, and carefully mounted the hide & hoof to those forms. Someone then bedazzled the hooves. All of these are volitional acts. Just what color is the sky in their world?
Very frightening that, for someone, this might not be nightmare or abomination. But, that’s ok, they probably would hire scantily-clad folks to liven up a funeral or two, after mounting the slightly-used stripper pole to the swing set.
O, o’er Flanders fields, rent by armwar
Grows the single blossom, bedazzler
Burton bloom in venison-soaked soil
Where the Ant and Not.A.Lion toil
I can’t begin to guess the color of the sky in their world, but it seems a safe bet to assume that, whatever it is, it is ugly and tasteless.
that may be the case, but considering what they’re likely smoking they probably think it’s very purty.
Unlike my elephant leg amore: Which is ugly and tastes like strawberries.
I’m sorry, but in true HHNF form, I must point out that you said elephant leg love. That tastes like strawberries. I don’t even want to know where the lip gloss was involved.
Maybe you should try decoupage, TM. If I have learned anything from my time spent in thrift stores, it is that decoupage covers a multitude of sins. And makes them worse.
Well… how else do you think they fill fruit-cream doughnuts?
I think I’ll be eating much more healthily now.
Glad I could help the diet.
But what about the custard…
You know, I’m better off not knowing.
you have to eat your sausage before you get the pudding.
Elephant Leg Love playing the Flying Pig 2Nite
Special £5 matinee after Tea!
Why not improve on Mother Nature’s creation by bedazzling it?!
Those poor deer.
What better way to display the Deerly Departed than by combining the whimsical glittery goodness of a Bedazzler with simple utility? I, for one, have already replaced all of my switchplates with Bedazzled doe ears and I also use deer teeth to babyproof the electrical outlets. What part of a deer *can’t* be used? I’ll tell you: none of it.
Hey sweety, guess what Mommy found for your room! You know how much you loved the movie Bambi? Now you can have something in your room that reminds you of all those pretty deers. I bet a couple of these feet might even be from Bambi’s mom. Why are you crying?
Oh, alleviate some of the horror and just tell your child,
“Don’t fret none too much sweetie. About that deer? I heard he shot his self.” [sic]
You weren’t crying last night when you were enjoying those venison steaks I made.
True story: my dad was driving home when I was about 12, and someone in front of him hit a deer. There in our ritzy suburban neighborhood (wasn’t our house, just a fluke that we lived there) he hauled it into the back of his pickup, picked up me and my mom, and made us go with him to a house where someone would clean it.
Then, every time my mom served dinner, he’d wait till we were eating and start talking about how beautiful it was right before the lady creamed it with her minivan. Yeah, my dad’s kind of an ass.
He went ‘an hero’ after watching Bambi.
My mom was no better. I’m a brave eater, and I’ve always been up to trying anything once. I ordered rabbit stew once in Williamsburg (going back to me and my “different” childhood). It shows up and is DELICIOUS! My mom tastes it, decides she likes it better than her food. So she begins to sing.
“Here comes Peter Cotton Tail…”
I ate bread.
That’s totally inapproriate and your mom is a jackass.
Everyone knows you should sing “Little Bunny Fufu” when you’re stealing rabbit stew.
Speaking of rabbit stew: YUM!
Next time my dad tries to name one of my buns ‘Stewart’, I’ll have his head mounted on my wall.
Just be careful it’s not Cymru rarebit, or it’ll be dog of the hare that bit you.
” ‘E’s vicious, ‘e is; look’it the faanngs, the fangs!”
I have a friend whose in-laws are French.
In France, the Easter Bunny does not bring you your treats, the churchbells do (long story, best told by David Sedaris if you’re interested). So they have no Easter bunny tradition there.
My friend went to her in-laws for Easter dinner, and they served … wait for it … hare.
Imagine reindeer steak at Christmas. (I have a friend who ate it in Iceland and said it was delicious, but it wasn’t at Christmas time.) While hare and rabbit are not the same, it was close enough that my friend was traumatized into thinking, “We’re eating the Easter bunny!”
That’s the most foul, cruel and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on! It’s got a vicious streak a mile wide.
He got Bors and Ector, that’s five. (Three, sire.)
Robin, go an change your armor!
Lola: reindeer isn’t a traditional Christmas food in Finland, but it is eaten often (it shows up on the cafeteria menu at work regularly). I wouldn’t be surprised if some people eat it at Christmas.
Here we see the hooves of a prime example of Odocoileus urbanicus sub. pentapodia, the Western Urban Five-Footed Deer. These are clearly recognizable by the species tendency to accent the hoof with small sparkling stones, a process known as “bedazzling” or “bling,” which is believed to make them more attractive to young females. Males of the species are recognizable by their distinctive call, said to sound like “Ungulate life 4 evah!”
The five-legged subspecies, of course, is even more clearly recognizable.
I can hear David Attenborough whispering this now.
Love that taxonomic classification!
*three-legged doe hobbles into clearing*
Awww, giiirl, I’m boutsta tell you sumpfin dat gon curl yo antlers. You know me and my girl Faline just went an gots our nails did and wuddayah know, some jive-ass honkey be sitting right in dat tree ober dere on Pine and Brook, and he done merked on our tails. An yaknow wha? That redneck crackah done jacked our new nails. You best believe it, sistah. He swept us off our feet right good. I gotsa-way wif three a my legs, but Feline, she weren’t so lucky. I tell you, those crazy rednecks be turnin this neighborwood into a right meadow. Can’t go nowheres wifout somebody tryin shoot yo ass.
I have the feeling that, although quite thinly veiled, this might be misconstrued as racist. Al Sharpton has got to be hiding somewhere around he….*Black Not.A.Lions attack*
Then I’m getting mauled for mine, too.
:::peeks over desk wearing safari hat::: I’m ready for any Not.A.Lion attacks. I’m gonna make it into a comforter.
Giiiirrrrl, I KNOW. But you hear what they did ta Thumper? Some stupid kid found him and took him home. So he’s stuck in this box, which ain’t so bad, cause he was gettin all the carrots he could eat, and the missus w’ant around to give him crap about bangin those fiiine lookin tame rabbits.
Then some bitch shows up, and…lean close….she COOKS him. That kids dad had some crazy ex, and the crazy crackah hoe goes and cooks him up for dinner.
Man…human bitches is craaaazy.
I tol him all dat talk bout dem lucky feeta his wain’t gon do him no good.
Ain’t so lucky now, girrrrl! HA! Put that third hoof up here so I can fix it. You wanna French Manicure this time?
The one who cooked him wasn’t the You’re-Not-Going-To-Ignore-Me-Dan! one was she?
Now you to can own the whole set!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39840615
Deer God.
LOVED TO DEATH!
You keep using that phrase; I don’t think it means what you think it means.
Yah, I had the same thoughts on, ’til death do us part’. I thought you were supposed to have a set date. The judge informed me that wasn’t the case.
” ’til death do us part’? How’s Friday at 5 work for you?”
Looks like I’m open, but I need to be promised googly-eyes and a place over the mantle before our meeting.
That deer stands like Charlie Chaplin.
looks like bambi had too much to drink at the party
You know it’s been a good party when a disembodied deer puts on a lampshade.
Spooky, twisted, mental image of Ghost Hunters episode, “OH! oh, [bleep], what the [bleep] was that? Was that a [bleep] Deer?”
The Google Ad Gods are workin’ their mojo again. I’m getting ads for coatracks, deer pictures, and something called a ” Hot Fix jewel applicator”.
That is just freaky.
It’s telling me that as a man over 30 (at the ripe age of 28) I should use a certain website to get a date.
Boy, my wife will be pissed.
Now that’s cat math at it’s best.
My cousin’s husband took up hunting, and he mounted a HUGE buck head RIGHT OVER THE FRONT DOOR. The three women of the home cried their eyes out as he did. But hey, it’s also a gun rack. So yeah, it’s hooves like this, AND a big pissed off dear face above it. Does look like he’s giving you the Double Duece when you’re leaving.
“Thanks for coming, F*ckers, don’t let the door hit you on the way out! Enjoy the beautiful world out there, since I’m stuck up on this assholes wall instead of with my wife and little chillens. Thanks for making me look so ‘artistic'”
As a hunter, I never really understood the whole mounting thing.
For one thing, a deer head really isn’t that neat looking and it completely clashes with my dragon and Mega Man collections.
Between the dragon and Mega Man collections and the missed mounting concept, it’s a wonder you haven’t had fawns of your own.
Given that information, it’s kind of a proof against Darwinian selection that I’ve managed to procreate.
Yay! So, are they….burritos?
More like those little appetizer tacos you can buy in the 16 pack. You know, the ones that are all greasy and weirdly soft when you reheat them in the microwave.
EDIT: Come to think of it, we do call the package we make every night with his swaddler the “Baby Burrito.” Well played HHFN, well played indeed.
*nomnomnom*
What? Oh, sorry, I was just eating this…aw, crap.
Ortega taco shells are made from PEOPLE!
Ohh, are we having soylent tacos tonight?
I have a dragon collection too 🙂
p.s. hi, I’m back.
Hi Silva!
*waves*
Hope you’re feeling better.
He makes it hold the gun that shot it? That’s just sick.
Sarajean, until you said that, I had not realized just how hilarious this is.
“I’m going to stuff you. And once you’re up there, could you hang on to the murder weapon, please?”
It would be kinda fun to kill another deer with a different gun and then have the two deer aiming at each other.
And by fun I mean disturbed.
You mean like this?
http://thechive.com/2010/03/19/bizarre-art-by-peter-gronquist-nothin-but-class-21-photos/
Weird. The plaid tank is cute, though.
For me, the most annoying thing is the “Also forgot to mention…” part. People are not reading this ad in real-time. Go back and edit it. Take your time. We do not need to know that you forgot it.
Is Cazio South American for Corey?
…No? I feel as though I am missing something vital here.
This brings to my mind a couple deer exiting from wildlife’s version of a nail salon after having gotten all dolled up for deer prom/deer bridesmaid duty when a couple hunters shoot them.
Or they were “deer of the evening” and this is the work of a deer serial killer.
Anyone know if the police have been recieving taunting letters written on leaves with berry juice?
Shame someone hadn’t mentioned this before. *ahem*
A gun rack….. a gun rack. I don’t even own *A* gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do… with a gun rack?
Hang your bandanna collection on it?
Besides, if you own enough guns to fill a rack, the responsible thing to do at that point is buy a safe instead.
[corey]Shed antlers (deer shed antlers after every rutting season) actually make better storage hooks, if only for the fact you can saw them to suit, and leftovers can be used for knife scales and the like. [/corey]
They make interesting chandeliers and furniture too.
You are officially Awesome.
party time, excellent.
Why, it’s simple, really. Use it to threaten people. Especially those unfortunates suffering from Not.A.Lion disease. Telling them you own a gun rack causes them to assume you also have multiple guns of various types.
I just noticed that this is listed under “art and craft”. That makes no kinda sense.
“What Not To Do when trying to craft a beautiful coat hanger”?
I’m gonna buy this for my girl. Even though she has a gun and coat rack made out of deer’s feet – it’s called the back of my pickup truck. Unfortunately, said pickup truck doesn’t fit in her bedroom. (It did fit in the living room when we thought of selling the truck on Craigslist.)
It makes as much sense as a Mattel Creepy Crawler’s Thingmaker.
I’ve still got one of those actually.
Hey. That thing was awesome.
Can you believe they used to let children make napalm spiders in that? My brother’s got about 25 burn scars from that thing to this day. It was AWESOME!!!
I wanted one so bad, but Mom always said “No!”. (But more forceful and sometimes with the use of “grown-up words”) Something about “you will hurt yourself” or “You’ll burn the house down”, something like that.
I short out one little wall outlet and I’m marked for life.
My parents always told me that if I wanted to play with fire I was to do it outside. It’s a stance I’m holding with my child as well.
But napalm isn’t ‘technically’ fire, now is it
I can hear the song now.
By the way, if this monstrosity is used as a gun rack, the only gun that would be appropriate to place on this would be this.
Yancy, wow. It almost makes me WANT the rack, so I can get the rifle. 8)
Beautiful gun. Be sure to “click to enlarge”……..
I just realized they spelled beerdazzled wrong.
I’m surprised nobody ran with this one, but….
Ray, the guy that has the gun!
I can’t decide which is my fav – this hanger or the couch that someone died on (if you don’t recall – http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=3006, it’s the second one down). I mean this one has a bedazzled carcass but the couch had a corpse stain/odour. We’re really comparing apples to…a different kind of apples here lol. This piece is touted as art while the couch ad had no qualms about telling you it’s morbid history/characteristics. On the other hand, the couch was still being sold for well more than it’s worth (ie $0) and I think killing 1.25 deers (or maybe one deformed one..which would actually increase its value) was more than $50 in labour let alone the taxidermy costs. Hmmm…the rhinestones really make this special…maybe if the couch came with the dead aunt (bedazzled of course) then it would be a clear winner…..
At least it’s not vagazzled. Although, if it were, it would be perfect for Jennifer Love Hewitt’s boudoir.
*climbing back in the chair after falling down laughing* sorry, but the words ‘bedazzled dear’ hit me without warning. anyway, dude’s right here, this thing is VERY unique and hopefully, it’s one of a kind as well. But what’s with the handkerchiefs? Is my daughter supposed to clean her assault rifle with it? and does it have to be bedazzled too, because that would raise some unwanted attention in gay-dear-world. Actually it wouldn’t be so unwanted, because it would not just save some nice flamboyant dears, but also protect us from more of those, err… things.
Oh noes! I didn’t punch anybody on this day! The world will probably end now. *hangs head in shame* I should turn in my custome-made brass knuckles and never show my face around here again. *checks to see if anyone looks concerned or interested*
My question … why 5 feet? If each deer has 4 feet then were did the extra foot come from? Or is this one foot from each of 5 deer? Maybe two horribly mangled deer with missing feet? Or is this just one hanger from a potentially matching set?! Are there 3 more of these floating around, totaling 20 feet from 5 normal 4-footed deer? But then this couldn’t really be called unique and one of a kind then, could it?
To me (who is non-American) this sounds like the ad is from Texas. Seriously.
I grew up in an all-boy family, so we had five-deer-feet gun racks without bedazzling or multicolored handkerchiefs.
(Part of the preceding sentence is true.)
The five-hoof part of it still scares me. That’s just not your normal deer.
I wonder if I should tell my neighbor about this one. Every deer season, her son sticks an honest to goodness deer hoof on the antenna of his 1998-ish Jeep Cherokee.*
*-Sad to say, this is entirely true.
My Little Taxidermy Pony
You know, nowhere in the ad does it actually say that the deer feet are taxidermied – just painted and bedazzled.
I really have nothing to say except, “Kapooya!”
Dave, you are Regent of the Baux for weekends. I hope that fits in to your busy schedule! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Deer Friends!
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