YSaC, Vol. 587: Post the Monkey!
Need Help Posting Pictures to Craigslist? I CAN HELP Funiture!
I can help you post any pictures to your ad on craigslist.
I will even come to you and take the pictures of your items for sale.
Then Ill post your items to sell on craigslist.If you don’t have time to list your item or you just don’t know how to post or add pictures to your posting, I can do it for you.
FOR JUST $20 YOU GET:
Big Beautiful pictures and as many as you want or need to show potential buyers the detail they need to want to buy your item.
I’m no way affiliated to craigslist, but I do use craigslist and there’s a lot of good sales but NO PICTURES to help sell the items. Most people viewing craigslist want to see pics of your items. I assure your pictures will sell your item.
Sellers!!! do not sell yourself short, if you really want to sell your item add pictures, especially yard sales, and garage sales etc.
If you need help e-mail me or call me.
[email]
###-###-#### text Msging are welcome.
“t”
I’ll be glad to help.
Example size pictures.
Example 1
[The second picture is exactly the same picture at a different resolution.]
Wow! For $20, you’ll add pictures to my Craigslist ad, something which I could do for free by myself? That’s fantastic! That’s like charging people to flag Craigslist ads! The only thing that would be more perfect would be if, after we posted this here on YSaC, someone contacted US for help with posting pictures on Craigslist.
It also raises the question: If you are trying to impress potential clients with your mad photo posting skilz, why THIS particular picture? There’s nothing like a monkey on a bedspread to say “high class commercial photography.” And there’s nothing like eating hay when you’re faint.
“‘I should think throwing some cold water over you would be better,’ Alice suggested: ‘-or some sal-volatile.’
‘I didn’t say there was nothing better,’ the King replied. ‘I said there was nothing like it.’
Which Alice did not venture to deny.”
Thanks for the link, Jessica!
I can hire him to take pictures of the coupons I am going to sell on CL. Sweet!
To be fair, he says he’ll help FURNITURE post pictures on craigslist, not people. And furniture does have trouble doing that, what with the lack of hands at all. And chester drawers and the armore are too busy preventing the French to do it themselves anyway.
Ron
Major water-spewing and tears running down the cheeks ensues!!
Elebenty-hunnert!!!
I’m a couch potato. Does that qualify?
So that is where my Not.A.Lion pictures and nacho fountain went! My furniture must have sold them on CraigsList. I always thought my desk was up to no good.
Kelli…I don’t know how to tell you this, but your other furniture is trying to sell your dinning set and your cuoach on CL.
I…I thought you’d want to know.
Coco – I can live without the dinning set, the noise was driving me crazy, but the cuoach is supposed to be helping my chairleaders this weekend.
Kelli… I’ve begun to suspect that my furniture has been seening your furniture behind our backs.
I’m filing for for a dumpster.
That beautiful table you wanted to sell? The couch gave it away for free!
Windrose – Not my Red Table for Sale! They took it for free?
The very one!
Precisely. It’s obviously the furniture that has been posting ads on Craiglist all this time. And how would an Ottoman know how to spell itself? Have you ever seen a couch at a spelling bee? I rest my cabinet.
Thought he spelt that as “fun-iture” which suggests some sort Spoonerism-slip of over enjoying the “D” side of B&D, perhaps?
Look again. He didn’t say FURNITURE at all.
I think he was promising the extreme FUNITURE his customers would have working with him to post a add on the criag’slist.
The ad starts with an offer to help “funiture”, but then goes on to describe awesome skilz with a camera.
I’m left confused and disappointed. My “funiture” is in need of an intervention, especially since it has been taking a beating from the new man in my life. He’s two, and everything he touches turns sticky.
“Funiture” is feeling used and abused, and here I thought I could get him the help he needed…all for only $20! Sigh…
I wonder if they would accept a tub of vintage cereals instead of actual money?
I’ve also got this minty shell…if you hold it up to your ear, you can hear the internet laughing at you.
I just love you today, sarajean
Awesome! Lamar is back!
But alas, Curious George* does not have that come-hither look like HYPNO-DOG!
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=3468
*I love it when artistic photographers use big words like resolution. Makes me feel like they’re totally legit.
So, you don’t think this is going to be a huge money-maker? *stashes camera and monkey under the funiture, whistles nonchalantly*
Can someone help me post my comment? This internets thing is so hard. If you could just go ahead and post my comment for me, there’s $20 in it for ya! And you should know – I’m a frequent commenter, so there more where that came from. Maybe we could work some kind of arrangement out. Perhaps a bulk discount if I sit on you?
You had me at “sit”.
Get a room! 8)
Just wait til HHNF gets here…oh, wait! I’ll pay myself to post as HHNF today.
@Windrose But this “funiture” is so comfy, I don’t want to leave… 😉
My “funiture” is so damn helpless (I have to move it myself!) I’m glad these people have taken up this cause. However, I don’t think I want my furniture posting pictures to Craigslist. My furniture cannot tell tales *ahem*, and that’s the way things should be.
1. I have an item that I want to sell for $8
2. I have no knowledge of how to take a picture let alone post it.
3. I hire an enterprising ass clown for $20 to do it for me.
4. My item sells.
5. I’ve made $8.
Seems straight forward to me.
You’re using the cat math calculator again TMm. You totally forgot to figure in taxes.
What’s the going tax on Craigslist scams these days?
8% of Wholesale, Retail or Ripoff.
Sqrt(broccoli) dollars.
A bit off topic, but does it bother anyone else that Curious George doesn’t have a tail?
Got too curious with a guillotine.
Also, I’m presenting my punch card! Woop woop! This is my second featured comment. The first one was eons ago and I can’t even remember what it was, sadly.
Well-deserved, Heather. *punchity-punch* Too bad your first Don’t Suck appearance is lost in the misty vales of prehistory. But the good news it, this one will be recorded forever in the forums.
Curious George doesn’t have a tail… because someone else was spanking the monkey.
Ah, no wonder he looks shocked.
He must have eaten the free sausage.
Yes, The Man With the Yellow Hat did it. Ah, why’s it always gotta be The Man?!
How shocked can he be when he appears to be wearing a half-shirt that says “Get (or Got) Curious”? Shockery should be expected to come with the territory.
Don’t you know you’re going to shock the monkey?
Darling, please!
Don’t like it but I guess I’m learning.
Monkey, monkey, monkey.
Ah, yes. “Curious George Discovers Meth”. I’ll be reading that book at Read Across America Day to grade schoolers. Followed by “Curious George and the Cosmetics Testers”.
I’m more disappointed that this Anne Geddes of the animal world didn’t even attempt to engage the viewer by posing George in an interesting primate composition. It just screams for something monkeyesque such as hanging with deer carcii (I’m adopting this word) from the swing set monkey bars…
….or flinging poo from the inside of a French prevential amore.
Where’s the $20 worth of pathos and suffering for your art “t”…? All we get is crotch with no tail.
Why am I seeing ads for beef jerky?
Camille, me too. The Fat Man’s Jerky does sound interesting. If only there was a picture of it.
I don’t want to see the fat man’s jerky. I want him to put it away, the pervert.
I’m getting Stove Top stuffing recipes.
Woo Hoo!!! Putting the “fun” back in funeral again!
Uh. My ads all say: “How I Get Free Sausages! Thanks to this website, I never have to pay for sausages anymore. ”
My dirty mind suspects there’s a euphemism there somewhere.
My dirty mind suspects the same thing.
It also has several suggestions on how to get free sausages.
I had free sausage this morning. 8) What? TMI?
Yes, TMI: Too Much Innuendo. 😉
Bacontini not have de sausages, but Bacontini still free to those who like de breakfast meats.
Yes, put Bacontini’s meat in your mouth for de rich flavor of bacon. What, why you back away from Bacontini? He only want to give you his meat for free.
Oh hello officer, Bacontini think there is a mistake. He only offer to let these people eat his meat and now dey are angry. Why you cuffing Bacontini?
Apparently Bacontini go now. He will see de ladies later.
Bacontini, here’s a tip for jail: don’t talk about or get out your tea bags OR your meat. Safety first!
Luckily, Bacontini keeps his rim greased, so he always ready for attention even in de jail.
Why you look at Bacontini dat way?
Ewww…Bacontini…you put the “pig” back in “pork”…!
What I want to know is where I can get some free vegetarian sausages. All the ones I’ve seen around here are meaty.
Meatless sausages can be satisfying, but every once and a while you kind of want something a little more substantial.
“equal oppertunity sausage” causes me to think of such items as boudain, haggis, blood sausages and the like. Which can be rather nice in discrete, well-executed, doses.
Don’t forget the chorizo! I like a little spicy sausage every now and then.
Do you like the links, or the pattys? I prefer Pattys to Links.
BTW, really great singing Jackie. Do you naturally sound just like Julie Andrews? 🙂
I am an equal opportunity sausage aficionado.
And I second the kudos to Jackie and everyone else who is to blame… er, I mean “responsible” for the video. Way to go, guys!
Thanks jg and sarajean80. I don’t always sound like Julie Andrews. I’m generally pretty good at sound-alikes (I also did the female vocals for A Whole Nude World 11 years ago), but my natural tendency is more toward opera.
Regardless of price, I’m just not sure about the basic concept.
Most of the furniture items I’ve seen posted on craigslist would be much easier to sell if they didn’t have any pictures. How on earth can this guy assure me that the pictures of my hideously flowered couch will help me sell it?
Indeed. Were there pictures with the items, most of my livingroom set would actually match. And I couldn’t possibly stand for that.
Same here. If anything I owned actually matched, I’d probably spontaneously combust. Most of the soft surfaces in my place are covered with towels or slip covers to catch the cat hair anyway. (By “slip covers” I mean “quilts with the fewest holes in them”)
This poster who is helping furniture take pictures better make sure the furniture is of legal age. Wouldn’t want to be an accessory to sexting. (Is that a Murphy bed in your pocket or are you happy to see me?)
You mean pictures like these? I’m reasonably sure all the furniture pictured here is of age, but you never can tell with some of these retro chairs.
Bleach wash, please. Sigh. Should know better than to follow every link blithely like that.
Yes, please pass the bleach this way when you are done, Windrose.
Jackie – please tell me you just googled that, and it isn’t a web site you regularly visit. Please?
*passes bleach to LurkRealClose* Hmm, seems to be losing its strength.
I have to admit that it was not the result of a quick search for pictures of furniture in compromising positions. I can’t remember how I first found Furniture Porn. I’ve been aware of it for a REALLY long time now. It’s one of the more hilarious (and less disturbing) examples of rule 34 I’ve seen.
Trying to lure Develish1 back to the comments:
see more Lol Celebs
Whoa! Didn’t realize the link was so massive! Good thing it was reduced to that little bitty thing there. 8)
Curious George and the Homemade Throw Pillow from the 70’s
Or, alternatively, I’ve got: Curious George and the Unfortunate $20 Crotch-Shot
Other ideas? 🙂
Curious George and the “where’s the money” shot.
” Curious George and his Gambling Problem”
“I swear, I’ll have the bananas by Tuesday! What are you doing? Let go of me! I already gave you the hat, I have nothing… No, not the tail, not the…!” CRACK
“Curious George In…I Was Young And I Needed The Money”
There is a creepy CraigsList-Casual-Encounters-posting air about that pose.
Dead on, sarajean. All that’s missing is a companion picture – blurry close up of his (nonexistent, in this case) genitalia.*
*Ever seen the blog “Desperately seeking … something”? It has a disclaimer before you click in because it’s defo NSFW. It is both hysterical and pathetic, so of course I love it.
*googles “Desperately seeking … something”*
Thanks Lola, now I am sad and giggly at the same time. I didn’t know I could do that.
“Bi-Curious George Hides the Banana of Love”
*snorting coffee out of nose*
See, thought this person has Tourette syndrome where they have to FURNITURE! shout out a certain FURNITURE! word when they are having a conversation. FURNITURE! How unfortunate.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tourette_syndrome
I’m confused by that “t” just sitting there in the middle of the ad. What does it mean?!?
Stephanie, I think that’s his handle. His web name. Who he is to his on-line community. Could be a her, for that matter. But he will sell you that t for 2 dollars. 8)
He also pitties the fool.
Fool! You talking a whole load o’ jibba jabba!
I’m assuming “t” is the name of the Fujifilm fool who placed the ad.
Curious George hated the advent of the Internet.
The one time he gets the paper stuck to his arse, and some asshat’s around to forever capture the moment on film.
Ah, the good ol’ days – when you had to wait until someone was famous to leak embarrassing nude photos of them to the press.
Now we have Facebook, where you can get (in)famous for posting embarrassing nude photos of yourself.
So true, sarajean…which brings up a question…why do people who do that ASSume the only folks who are going to see said photos are the ones they intend to see said photos??
OT — I just discovered the group Neanderthal Sponge Cake. 8)
Headlining for FatMan’s Beef Jerky (actual ad over there ——>)
Now the ad generator is featuring “Sausage Maker Seasonings
Create Your Own Succulent Sausages [italics added] using our Mixes.” Which is waaaaay too potentially innuendo-filled for me … I think my brain has given up trying to do work today and is instead just generating smut.
I’m getting the eponymous Fat Man’s Jerky and wireless ethernet adaptors, a combination that I find very odd and disturbing.
I wonder if Curious George chewed his tail off when he was hung from the swingset…
Nope. He lost his tail on the monkey bars, which is the other playground equipment that will be included. (You know, I knew people who lost their tail on the monkey bars….)
I knew people who got tail on the monkey bars.
maybe they left it with the swing set and the deer…. i still cant get that image outta my braim.
Get the monkey some pants!
Pervert.
Monkey porn is the last thing I need right now.
I thought we were paying that other guy to block this kind of smut!
Poor George, who knew that his experiment with the ether was just a gateway into harder drugs and harder living. Look at him now, taking low paying “modeling” jobs for amature “photographers.” Bet that breaks the man in the yellow hat’s heart.
I like the part about using photos for yard sales and garage sales.
So, first you stage your yard sale in advance. Then this guy comes by and takes photos of a bunch of crap spread around your yard. Then you pack it all back up, post an ad, and pull everything back out a few days later for the actual yard sale.
Sign me up!
You’re not getting with the program BS!!! The pictures are well worth it and are “what you NEED to show potential buyers the detail they need to want to buy your item”… That is just so obviously worth the tradeoff.
Achten Sie darauf, wecken dass Lesers Wunsch . Meine eigene Der Immobilienmarkt Inhalt Stücke gemeinsam mit dem allerbesten Kosten tendenziell sind in der Regel Dinge, Ihre pic in unserem $ 17, 500 Haushalt. In Anbetracht Interessierten Lernen Typen von Haushalt neigen wir dazu, kann gut zahlen für der? Viele Fans Zuschauer sind im Allgemeinen viel zu! Es ist ein . “Necken Zoll louis vuitton taschen
13. Sie haben bestimmt beschriebenen fundamentalen Bestimmungen und zusätzlich das sein wird mysteriösen hin breite Öffentlichkeit insbesondere zusammen mit muss erwähnt artikuliert. Stellen Sie sicher, gekommen zu sein kontinuierliche in ihre Arbeit mit;
Attention, benevolent overlords! German spambot ahoy!