YSaC, Vol. 478: In which Dan spends no time at all researching guitars.
A few posts back, we had a lively discussion as to the characteristics of a certain guitar.
Well, we’re in luck, gang! There’s no debate needed on THIS one, because he’s listed everything for us:
2006 Victory Jackpot – $16000
2006 Victory Jackpot
Sunset red
5057 miles
100 c.i. engine/6-speed transmission
250 rear tire
Never wrecked or dropped, no damage
Runs perfectly
•••
Upgrades: Monaco mag wheels, Arlen Ness Slashness pipes, custom v-bars, mirrors, pegs, grips
$24,000 total investment
Tires have less than 500 miles wear
•••
Call Mike at ###-###-####
See. No possible argument here. This is clearly a 2006 Victory Jackpot Guitar. I’m pretty sure that’s the one Jack Black plays in “Brütal Legend.”
This guitar is sunset red, has 5057 miles on it, and has a 100 c.i. engine / 6-speed transmission. That’s pretty good, actually. My guitar is only a 55 c.i. engine, and it really struggles on hills.
Also, it has 250 rear tires! Isn’t that amazing? Most guitars only have one!
Thanks for the link, Eric!
Somewhere on CL, there’s an ad with pictures of a motorcycle and a write-up of a guitar.
Oh, so it’s like Concentration! I was pretty good at that game. 8)
No airbags, though. Shame.
Heather, does Gravatar not allow GIFs? Because you need the glowing version of your jello lump over here, too 😉
It shows up on the forum side *points to forum link*, but I don’t know what the deal is here. Give it some time, I guess?
Jello lump?!?! :S
Just don’t jam in the basement or garage, kids. Carbon monoxide, you know.
I want to see how many cars Robbie Knievel can jump on that thing! I know the engine on it is a little small, but the 250 tires can make up for the lack of power.
Plus, if he is so inclined, he can play “Born To Be Wild” on it as he flies through the air!
Jackpot!
Careful now, Dan. You may have just given Jack Black his next script idea.
“It’s a guitar, that transforms into a motorcycle! And shoots laser beams! Me and my band ride around dispensing vigilante justice by day and playing big arena rock shows by night. It’s like an updated KISS Saves Santa.”
Irregular Fractal: I would so totally see that if Jack Black did it.
Three years old and only 5000 miles? I bet it’s the guitar that some ‘little old lady from Pasadena’ only took to church, bingo, hair salon, and grocery store. That’s good mileage, but it’s not much of a deal if it has that old person smell.
Lola, zat you???? wowzers.
Lola! You do look like Catherine! 8)
I can’t see it, still see the old one – oh well!
But thanks! 🙂 All y’all are sweet. *blush*
Lola, why do you need to see it? Dontcha know what you look like?
Always interesting to know how others see one.
Lola, it’ll probably fix itself if you clear your cache.
(Not a perverted metaphor, I swear!)
Heh heh, you said “cache.”
Actually, I do know what you mean, and that prolly explains why one of the main desk terminals at work keeps showing my previous Deneuve avatar.
*~*~*~*~*
I’ve just done that while writing this. Let’s see …
Later edit: Bugger.
Then you should watch the pilot for Heat Vision and Jack. Co-starring Owen Wilson as the motorcycle.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWXe4CKKf9o
Oh crap…”Kiss Saves Christmas.” Some things are better off forgotten.
You don’t mean that was a real movie?!?
not according to my hubby.
He claims as follows
“it’s shown in a christmas ep. of family guy but it never actually existed, it’s a fictional movie created for the ep. The band do guest in the show though.”
I’m taking his word on it since he’s a bigger music fan than me. The only real Kiss film I know of though is Kiss meets the Phantom of the Park, which should still be forgotten, lol.
But there WAS a KISS movie wherein the band saved the world from evil KISS.
I can’t make this kind of material up: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077788/
yep, that’s the one I meant Coco, and apparently it was truly dreadful, lol
Irregular Fractal: write the script and pitch it, you’re sitting on a gold mine.
The game I referenced in the post, Brutal Legend, is pretty much what you described.
I really like the features, but I’m not so hot about the color….got anything in Day-Glo Orange??? I want it to go with a couch I just bought.
On other subjects, yesterdays comments were fantastic, people. I was like 4th, and I go back today and there are what…178 or something nuts like that. I almost feel like we need a….a….I’ll say it…a chat room. I know, so very ’94, but I’d like to talk with you folks sometimes…in REAL TIME!!! I like ya.
I, too, was impressed by the level of comments. We do have forums, and while not real time and still warming up in terms of participation, they’re an alternate to the comments.
If you’ve visited the forums, then don’t mind me. I don’t think I looked yesterday (*feels bad about not participating in them more*).
Yep, I’m on there regularly. I started the “Tshirts Please” post.
Well, it’s possibly sad that we have nothing better to do on a Friday night. 8) All except Igor.
I guess it’s not a Fender on either end of this ad…
I’m looking for a nice hybrid guitar. You know, one that’s electric but also runs on gasoline. Hit me up if you find one!
Hey, did we find Igor yet? It’s freaking NOON, and I have yet to see his sparkling visage. Didn’t see a trace of him yesterday, either.
You don’t think….nah….he couldn’t be…doing stuff…you know…in the “real world”, could he?????
I’m thinking his folks took him on vacation or something. Sigh.
*searches under couch cushions* Igor??
*searches attic* Where arrrreeee youuuu?
*searches under bed* IGOR?
*sigh* I don’t think he’s hiding in my apartment.
In Soviet Russia, cute teenager looks for YOU!
That’s it, I’m moving. There, and back in time.
*thinks for a moment*
Meh, maybe not. I’m too soft and capitalist and don’t want to stand in line for toiled paper that could be mistaken for sandpaper (or couch upholstery, as the case may be).
*toilet paper. But considering the setting, maybe “toiled” is not entirely inappropriate either.
In Soviet Russia, paper toils for you
Thanks for looking, though. Maybe we need bumper stickers that ask “Got Igor?”
Those older women can wear you out. He could be down for days.
I’m glad you guys missed me. And nah, just been… asleep.
What? I get pretty damned tired, especially right before a long weekend.
On another note, this guitar-reality transfer reminds me of something my friend got in his honesty box- he’s a guitar player- “They call you shreddy? Shred my p*ssy.”
There was another one, but it was like “I want you to have”, then 4 pages of adjectives and then “sex with me.” One of the adjectives was public, painful, etc..
On the other note, whoever chooses to move to MA can come give me a big slap in the face for acting like a freaking koala all week. (The sleeping 22 hours part and sitting and eating for the other two, I mean.)
Oooh no wonder I couldn’t find you under the bed! You were in it!
On a related side note, the only times I’ve ever slept for 22 hours were when I took too much codeine (fun stuff, my parents thought I might die but just left me there) and when I had the Martian Death Flu. Even my worst depression never made me sleep THAT much. I don’t think it’s healthy…
Meheheheh.
My worst depression symptom pre-diagnosis was when I was 13 or 14, and constantly arguing with my parents- stayed up around 4 days straight and slept through the entire day. When I woke up, it was during a thunderstorm, and then I put on pajamas and ate my parents’ iced cream before I realized the sun hadn’t actually set yet.
I’m in NH; I’ll be right down. 🙂
WELCOME BACK!!! Nice to know we all worry about you when you don’t show for your daily postings, huh?
Not really shocked that you can sleep for 22 hours straight. You are a teenager…it goes with the territory. Hibernating are you?
Glad to have you back, my shiny friend.
Hibernation is healthy… but in two hours, I’ve got a man-date with my dad and a few friends! Go teenagerhood!
Sometimes we adults hibernate too. If I don’t sleep much in the week I’m entirely too capable of going to bed at 11 on Friday night and waking up at 1 on Saturday (if there is no guy here, which is the case lately; also, having no children helps you sleep a long time).
Man-date! What does that involve? Are you going to smoke cigars and tell dirty jokes?
Man dates! I went on those from time to time (not that I’m a man…) We would go down to a bar near where my dad’s friend worked, meet up with him, and drink Screwdrivers and gin & tonics to excess. One time when I came home and was very drunk my dad told my mom he’d only bought me 2 drinks. He’d bought me 5. His excuse: “Well, I was too inebriated to count”
Our man-dates would frequently include dirty jokes and cigars, though I always shunned the cigar part, what with being allergic to nicotine and all.
Pretty much. Mozzarella and roast beef subs, head down to the movie theater while making dirty jokes- make sure to park near the entrance, so they don’t have to walk or carry anything around too much (wouldn’t want to remind them of the mall, like a woman-date), watching the movie and laughing at how the guy in G.I. Joe says “Keel all ze Joews” in a way that sounds EXACTLY like “keel all ze jews”.
Mine include excessively dirty jokes and fake cigars, but I only go on man-dates with my friends that you guys would appreciate- people like my little brother (or evil, tiny, opposite-colored twin) don’t really get the concept of bro-polygamy.
Edit: Brolygamy?
Like Bromance?
I like it…
If you ever use the word “bromance” here again, I may be forced to hate you. You are NOT Brody Jenner D: Thank god.
If you’re allowed to have “girlfriends”, I’m allowed to call ’em bromances 😉
-Proceeds to sing the song “It’s Guy Love” from Scrubs-
Pah, I don’t call ANYONE a “girlfriend”.
I just assumed you wouldn’t want to be associated with the source of the word bromance, is all >_>
*proceeds to blow-dry pony hair and dance around the apartment to bad music*
Meh, it may be used by idiots, but the level of awesome contained in that pun plus the implication of homo-erotic images is well worth it in my eyes. 😛
Windrose: Hi!
And nobody has anything to say about the much, much stranger second half of that post? 😛
You’re our Igor come home! 8) Hey sleep while you can, youngster.
Amen to that, Windrose. Over the summer when I had a full-time, set-schedule job at the lab, I was SO happy. I had a routine! I had time for sleep! I had money!
Now…I’m lucky if I get 5 hours on a school night. Weekends are largely passed asleep.
Sigh…he’s probably out with some GIRL. I guess we are just not enough for him.
In other news….A very special man stopped by to leave me lunch at work…and left me a brand new laptop with it.
Holy Extravagent Gifts, Batman!!!
What a guy
… Is there any way I can send him my address so I can get lunch and a brand new lappy, too? 😉
Hot damn! That’s some guy you have there. If he ever happens to be in Oregon tell him to drop me a line, my “N” key is starting to stick and my screen has a small crack in it, plus these mini laptops aren’t as fun and cute as they look. While he’s at it, see if he can bring me that guitar, I bet it gets GREAT mileage and my SUV just istn’t cutting it these days.
Ha!!! “Would you like anything else with your order?” has never had such meaning.
He’s a pretty amazing guy, and this gift isn’t even scratching the surface of it. He’s damn cute too…he’s got one of those little handlebar moustaches and hot tattoos and the most beautiful clear blue eyes….sigh. Okay, so this isn’t a forum to drool about the menfolk, but he really does sound too good to be true. If I hadn’t known him so long I would be highly suspicious.
Lola…Homestar reference???
I don’t even know what Homestar is! So, no, at least, not intentionally.
LOLA!
http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html
Thanks Igor. I though I might faint when she said she didn’t know Homestar. Glad you and I are on the same page.
I think I need to sing a song about my Lappy. Now I just need a “The Paper” and I’m all set.
I had heard (now that I’ve seen it) of Homestar, but had not actually experienced it.
*darts eyes around frantically, now wondering if I am old and past it*
-comes out of a month of lurking-
I wonder if it has a working air conditioner or heat? If there’s no air bags, I’d at least like it to keep me comfortable during a crash.
Also, what are the safety ratings on it?
That guitar looks like it would splinter if it crashed, so I can’t see it having a very high safety rating. After all, there aren’t airbags.
P.S. Hi there Nicole! I’ve been reading for about half a year now (went through all the archives within the first 2 days I found the blog…) and just started commenting about a week ago.
Love when we call the timid little Lurkers out of the bushes. Leaving crumbs around the parameter helps.
Welcome!
I didn’t see any crumbs?
Where’s my crumbs? I want crumbs dammit! Better yet the whole cake, lol.
I’m out of cake but I do have some oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.(My mom leftme a bunch of cookie dough when she was here last weekend, so these are actually Mom cookies.) I would be happy to share them with a fellow tortie.
ooooh, choc chip cookies, even better.
See Nicole, coming out of the shadows has it’s privileges.
I am configured to accept cookies.
I love cake, I consider it a moral tipping point.
I can watch a movie, and if someone dies, I think “Okay, it’s a murder. People kill for lots of reasons. Wait? What? He destroyed his cake, too? WHO THE HELL MESSES WITH THE CAKE?!”
Thank you! I’ve been such a creeper lurky lurking away from all of your fields of vision, but I promise I will stay out of the bushes from now on.
-Steps out of the shower and shakes water out of his hair like a dog-
You can stay in them, if it makes you feel more comfortable… Either way, keep watching. 😉
Everyone here is lovely, so please all have a virtual spoon. I’d like to share the mocha flan brought to me a little while ago by a friend who works at a Cuban restaurant. Es muy bueno.
oooh, first cookies, now flan, I’m glad I stayed up a while
Igor,
If I didn’t know better I’d think you were the son of a friend of mine. She’s all about the cake. She once told me that if an emergency was declared that involved having to evacuate where she lived, she wouldn’t leave. She would just drive to the bakery. The exact quote: “I’m gonna die with CAKE in my mouth!”
Well, here’s the thing- it’s delicious, tasty, SUGAR-y, and if you see someone who doesn’t like cake or destroys a cake, then you don’t feel bad judging them because really, who besides a narcissist thinks they’re above loving cake?
I make a recipe my mom got years ago. It’s called “Perfect Chocolate Cake”. It takes more than a dozen eggs, a pound of butter each for the cake and icing, an entire container of dark dutch cocoa powder, heavy cream….you get the idea. For obvious reasons, it is only served at birthdays and Christmas, when I replace the usual whipped cream filling with creme de menthe filling. It’s the stuff of legend among friends and family now.
Just thought I’d add to the cake-love before we all move on to today’s post.
Meredith,
I have to go change my top because of drooling all over this one whilst reading your recipe. Mmm! Probably a good thing that you don’t serve it too often as it definitely sounds deliciously lethal.
Meredith, I want to die with that cake in my mouth.
I’m definitely going to eat it until I have a heart attack..
No one even bothers to ask what KIND of cake someone wants for their birthday. if they don’t want Perfect Chocolate Cake, then they can make their own damn cake! I had a friend who froze hers to try and not eat it so fast by herself…it lasted three days.
When it’s in my house, it’s commonly known as “breakfast, lunch, and dinner” till it’s gone.
OM NOM NOM CAKE
I just made an angelfood berry cake, but my significant other does not seem to be around 😉 ALL FOR ME
So are you ok with people who love cake but hate frosting, Igor?
Oh yummie! I am in the process of mastering carrot cake. I have about a half dozen recipes and a week and a half to try them all before I have to make a cake for my mom’s wedding. The best part is, I don’t even like carrot cake so I won’t be tempted by the dozens of cupcakes I will inevitably make.
I suppose, but I did once eat an entire “mini-cake” that someone who couldn’t bake made out of nothing but frosting. In school.
Can you say “inability to focus in the classroom”?
Damn, I’m away for two days watching the cricket and there’s, like, 2 million comments to read through. If only there was some way I could take my computer *to* the stadium…but I know I’d be too nervous to turn it on even if I could for fear I’d miss something. You know you’re addicted to a sport when you’re afraid to take even a bathroom break in a 7-hour game in case something major happens, which is completely possible in cricket.
No, I’m not from North America. How on earth did you guess??
Hi Lareina!
Baseball’s not entirely unlike cricket. It can be going along rather (according to some, anyway) dully and then get exciting without any warning. We still risk going to the bathroom once in a while, though. Intra-inning breaks help.
As for N Americans not being cricket fans … depending on where one lives, there can be more than you might think! I live in NYC and we have both East and West Indians here in enough numbers that when the weather is good they are playing at the park in their cricket whites. My boss is South Asian by way of Guyana and we’ve learned that if you want to get him in a good mood we can just ask about cricket and he’s off and talking!
Hi Lareina
Which match? Cricket’s great – take a look over at the forum and the book recommendations – “Penguins Stopped Play” is all about a British village cricket team playing around the world. Very, very funny.
I’m British – cricket is in my veins.
It was New Zealand vs. Pakistan, tigprincess. I love the Pakistani side dearly (even though I’m Indian – and as such have cricket in my blood, too!), but I was rooting for New Zealand because of the wonder that is their captain, Daniel Vettori. I don’t even feel bad for shamelessly ogling him during play (he is a beautiful, beautiful man) because he’s such a fantastic player, so I can tell myself honestly that I love him primarily for his skillz.
But you guys won the Ashes! And then lost the ODI series pretty badly, but still! South Africa’s going to be a tough ask, though, especially since they’re playing at home and still licking wounds from the Champions’ Trophy.
Lola,
That’s me to a T as well! Get us uber-fans talking and we won’t shut up. I started a cricket blog recently just so that I could have a place to babble about cricket without risking alienating all my long-suffering American and Canadian friends.
I am from North America and have no understanding of cricket, but I am a fan of listening to the cricket reports on the BBC. I have no idea what they are talking about, and they use all sort of words I never hear other places. It amuses me.
I am from North America and don’t understand the way anything but the batting/pitching/strikes work.
I was in Australia once when I was younger, however, and saw a match that was 500 to 64.
It made me think… “…Question mark?”
Igor,
Must have been a Test match that was still in progress. They are usually four to five days long you know. *runs off to check Cricinfo.com for stats to confirm* Was it an international match, do you remember?
develish1,
It’s a very complicated game, I’ll give you that. I just think the complexity makes it that much richer. Once you know the game well enough to understand all the tiny nuances, it’s incredibly rewarding and utterly absorbing. For me, anyway. I guess it’s one of those games that you need to invest a lot in!
One of my English friends is such a cricket fiend that when I listen to the BBC (Radio 4 fan here) online and note that there is a test match involving England, I know, if he hasn’t already told me there is one on, not to expect communication from him for several days, though the occasional “ASHES!!!!” or similar will come through.
well I’m in the UK, plus my dad is a cricket fan, so I should understand it I guess. I don’t of course, it just doesn’t seem to make any sense to me.
I wonder why my Gravatar isn’t showing up….
Wowsers! Look at all the real faces now, it’s awesome.
Clear your browser cache and it’ll show up. I can see it.
Yep, there it is. Lesson learned, wait before asking stupid questions on a public forum.
Mine took ages to show up. I think the trick was actually turning the computer off and then coming on again next day. I’d done everything else but that was the only thing that worked.
Oh, and if you have Windows 7, you have to unselect “Preserve Favorites Website Data” when clearing your cache from IE8. I just figured that one out. Unless of course, you don’t have YSaC in your favorites, which I would find hard to believe. 😉