YSaC, Vol. 438: The daring young man on the …

2009 September 28

It’s been a while since we had a nice French Prudential piece, hasn’t it?

French Pervential – $3200


French Pervential 3 pice sofa Loveseat And arm chair Two End Tables One coffe table Very Clean Excelent Condition Like New $3200 O.B.O For more info call at xxx-xxx-xxxx ask for bob

Somehow I always pictured pervential furniture as involving a lot more black leather and eyebolts. I don’t even see any trapezes. I’m so disappointed.

cought &chair – $500


1960es french proncial chought &chair good shape

Just couldn’t even be bothered, could you? It’s barely worth getting out of bed in the morning for a measly $500 anymore, I’m sure — why should you make all the effort to spell out the word “Provincial” or come anywhere near approximating the word couch?

Just out of curiosity, I checked. There are 211 words ending with -ght in the English language. As far as I can tell, not a single one of them is pronounced with the same ending sound as the word couch. In related news, it’s official — the internet is completely full. If there’s a site listing the 211 words that end in -ght, there’s nothing more to be done.

Thanks to jentherose and Diana from Vancouver for the submissions!

67 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 September 28
    tigprincess permalink

    The second listing is obviously from someone who is now on a health kick and has given up both artificial tanning and smoking at the same time (getting into good shape) thus making their “cough tan chair” redundant – in fact they’ve described it a french bronchial (its a well-known fact to all Craiglisters that the French use ‘p’ instead of ‘b’ and have a silent ‘h’ in many words). For $500 you too can now have a smoking chair where you can get a lovely tan AND puff away to your heart’s content. Might have to question what they were smoking since they do mention not just the Sixties but in fact the precise date of 1960es which I recollect was when Woodstock happened?

    Adores: 4
  2. 2009 September 28
    Sherri permalink

    Um.

    Yeah.

    This is so self-snarking that making a comment seems both redundant and cruel.

    Let’s just call this whole thing French Perv and be done.

    Adores: 11
  3. 2009 September 28

    I know we wonder this about every three postings but how on earth did the person who wrote the second post even manage to properly use a computer, connect to the internet, and then post it online? How do you misspell the same word in two different ways? How do you function without a brainstem?

    Adores: 17
    • 2009 September 28
      Sherri permalink

      How do these people even manage to sit on chairs?

      Adores: 17
      • 2009 September 28
        Insufficient Data permalink

        Maybe they can’t, and that’s why they’re selling them?

        Adores: 31
      • 2009 September 29

        What’s a chair?

        Adores: 2
        • 2009 September 29
          sarajean80 permalink

          I think they mean “char”.

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 September 29
          Lola permalink

          Chars in good shap, too.

          Adores: 4
  4. 2009 September 28

    Cought? Well, goddamn. We’ve reached a new low.

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 September 28
      PrincessLuceval permalink

      *cought, cought* It’s like coughing on your couch with a hairball.

      Adores: 0
    • 2009 September 28
      Linnee permalink

      I thought is was a cot for sale, well, until I realized there was no such thing as a french pervential cot. French prudential, yes.

      Adores: 5
  5. 2009 September 28

    I like how “1960” ends with an -es. haha.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 September 28
      PrincessLuceval permalink

      That’s because that person remembered that when a word ends in “o,” one pluralizes with “es.” A zero is like an “o,” isn’t it?

      Adores: 23
      • 2009 September 28
        Lola permalink

        My brain is pronouncing the date as “nineteen six-toes”.

        Adores: 10
        • 2009 September 28

          Ah, yes; that little known movement when furniture for polydactyl cats was all the rage.

          Adores: 6
        • 2009 September 28
          Mrphysic permalink

          ‘My brain is pronouncing the date as “nineteen six-toes”.’

          Which incidentally, also describes the poster of the original comment – IQ 19, with six toes.

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 September 28
          Mrphysic permalink

          Sorry – meant poster of the original AD – not comment – I’m sure your IQ and toe count are beyond repute Lola…….

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 September 28

          oh, my God…..I did the exact same thing.

          Glad it’s not just my brain…

          Adores: 0
  6. 2009 September 28
    Jane permalink

    Why does bob tease us with a photo of the french pervential LAMP that he is obviously NOT offering for sale? What a pervent!

    Adores: 9
    • 2009 September 28
      Sherri permalink

      The lamp is the most obviously perverted thing in the whole ad. That lamp has worked a few bordellos. You can tell.

      Adores: 4
      • 2009 September 28

        I think you mean b0rde110es.

        Adores: 15
        • 2009 September 28
          Sherri permalink

          Noooooooo!

          Adores: 0
  7. 2009 September 28
    lost_compass permalink

    I had a raging case of the French proncial chought once – after that crazy weekend with the Parisian flight attendant, I think.
    I sounded like a cross between Courtney Love and Rod Stewart for a couple of days, but fortunately the cephalexin cleared it right up.

    Adores: 27
    • 2009 September 28
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      I’m really committed to fighting the spread of French pronchial chought worldwide, but I’m unclear as to which organizations I should be supporting in that effort. Safe sex advocacy? Health care reform? Organizations fighting against high prescription costs in third-world countries? Fair-trade furniture manufacturers?

      Adores: 14
  8. 2009 September 28
    JcT permalink

    They can write a 30+ word ad and not use any punctuation, but somehow add two periods (instead of three) between OBO when it is common to just use OBO without punctuation as shorthand for ‘or best offer’. This posting is amazingly broken. I can almost understand spelling ‘piece’ as ‘pece’ or ‘peece’ or even ‘peice’, but spelling it ‘pice’ shows synaptic degradation beyond casual drug abuse.

    What REALLY gets to me, though, is that this is really nice furniture. I wouldn’t own it, as it looks like something Liberace would own, but dang that kind of stuff is really expensive. How did people this stupid make that much money???

    I would push their reset button, but I am sure it is broken at this point.

    Adores: 14
    • 2009 September 28
      queensbee permalink

      thank you. I didnt know what OBO meant. in which case, my best offer is: here’s a buck …

      Adores: 1
    • 2009 September 28

      My theory is that pice is spelled that way because it rhymes with Nice.

      Not nice as in nice French furniture, but Nice as in French furniture from Nice.

      We are obviously dealing with someone who knows more geography than literacy.

      Adores: 9
      • 2009 September 28

        That would be the only way it would make sense, but then if someone could misspell “piece” then they would probably pronounce Nice as “nice” and not “niece”.

        Adores: 1
    • 2009 September 28

      I wouldn’t want to touch ANYTHING, even the reset button. I might catch French Pervential cought. Sounds itchy and I don’t think my health plan would cover it.

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 September 28

      This posting is broken, but it’s not beautiful and broken so I’m going to have to pass.

      Adores: 2
  9. 2009 September 28
    Brian permalink

    I like how he capitalizes almost everything except for his own name…

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 September 28

      bob’s the modest type, it seems. Doesn’t want to tempt us with reflectoporn or a blurry image that looks like it was shot through Vasoline, so he doesn’t use pictures but does expect us to hands over five big boys. Perhaps he thinks he can describe the pair so vividly by phone that the caller will instantly give him their credit card number.

      Adores: 3
    • 2009 September 28
      Mrphysic permalink

      But looking at those photos too – that furniture is not ‘bob’ furniture. That furniture might belong to a ‘Julian’, or a ‘Tarquin’, or for women you might get a ‘Violet’, or ‘Felicity’. But it’s not ‘bob’ furniture – unless bob has been breaking and entering.

      Sorry everyone named ‘bob’ – I just assume you guys have more masculine tastes.

      Adores: 8
      • 2009 September 29
        sarajean80 permalink

        Perhaps he is a “Roberto” and thought “bob” would appeal more to the unwashed masses that normally use CraigsList.

        Adores: 0
  10. 2009 September 28
    Sherri permalink

    You know, we could offer classes in How Not To Embarrass Yourself & Frighten Potential Buyers With Your Craig’s List Ad, but I suspect many of these, um, whatever they are think their ads the height of style, sophistication, and verbal clarity. Then they’ve return to whatever it is they are doing with the furniture.

    Adores: 3
  11. 2009 September 28

    I never would have guessed that “cought” was supposed to be couch. I was sitting here, surprised that anyone made such fancy cots. (I really can’t make out much of anything in those pictures.)

    Also, there are a lot of billboards in my area for the real estate company Prudential. Every time I see them, I think of YSAC and start giggling like a madwoman.

    Adores: 11
    • 2009 September 28
      drmk permalink

      My work here is done.

      Adores: 12
  12. 2009 September 28
    pixie721 permalink

    Someone needs to protect our children from foreigners with their sick, perverted furniture, their random capitalization, and their bizarre invented spelling.

    Adores: 14
    • 2009 September 28
      drmk permalink

      Won’t someone PLEASE think of the children!

      Adores: 7
    • 2009 September 28

      What may save us, me and you
      Is if the Craigslisters love their children too.

      Adores: 3
  13. 2009 September 28
    Lola permalink

    There’s a Russian pervential who lives in the apartment building next to mine. He earned the nickname “Pervski” after repeatedly flashing his ass out the uncovered kitchen window about 6 months after I moved inn (true story). I didn’t realize until now that he was part of an international ring of perverts with costly, overwrought furniture.

    Adores: 10
    • 2009 September 28
      JcT permalink

      You are WAY more tolerant that me. If he lived near me, he would have been down at the station, explaining his actions to the local cops. Kids have it bad enough these days without freaks showing their wares to the neighborhood, also.

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 September 28
        Lola permalink

        I put up heavy curtains and closed them, and moved my bedroom to a different room. A month or so later I peeked out of the window and Pervski was still standing in his kitchen sipping coffee, but wearing a robe.
        I didn’t report him because I probably would have needed to provide photographic evidence, and I already needed to bleach my eyes and brain after the original viewings. Photographic memory assistance probably would have resulted in a need for therapy.
        I had a friend come to visit who knew about the situation and who walked around that window pantsless at every opportunity during his visits. Mrs. Pervski apparently was offended and put a flowery decal up over *their* window. That confirmed for me the suspicion that she knew nothing about Mr Pervski’s early-morning activities.
        I still see him on the train sometimes. I ignore him.
        And from what I can see of their home (not that I try, I avoid looking directly at their windows whenever possible), they have the taste (or lack of) to buy this dreck. Russo-French pervential indeed. If I could find his reset button I’d get someone else to push it. I don’t want to touch the exhibitionist jerk.
        Ahem. Carry on, that is all.

        Adores: 1
  14. 2009 September 28
    Colleen in MA permalink

    It’s my birthday today. May I please have that lamp?

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 September 28
      JcT permalink

      Happy Birthday! But no, you can’t have it. You are not Pervential enough.

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 September 28
        Colleen in MA permalink

        That’s what you think … ask my Spidey Man.

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 September 28

          Rrowr!
          Happy Birthday, Colleen in MA, or anywhere you want to have it.

          Adores: 0
    • 2009 September 28
      drmk permalink

      Happy birthday, Colleen in MA!

      Adores: 0
      • 2009 September 29
        Colleen in MA permalink

        You all will appreciate this – Mr. Colleen in MA and I went out to dinner to celebrate and after one expresso martini somehow I got good and going with my old CL stories. Have to say I learned a lot about human nature with all of my experiences in the roommate-wanted section alone, back in the day…

        Adores: 0
    • 2009 September 29
      Trinket permalink

      Happy Birthday! I guess my invitatione to your birthday event must have been lost in the meil, huh?

      Adores: 2
      • 2009 September 29
        Colleen in MA permalink

        Actually it was up on CL in casual encounters. You know, laid-back parties. That was the place to put it, right?

        Adores: 1
  15. 2009 September 28
    Jess permalink

    My Grandmother has a set of Capodimonte lamps in, how shall I put this, much less clothing. I’ll have to advise her of their French Pervential heritage.

    Adores: 2
  16. 2009 September 28
    ??? permalink

    The poor &chair, it is so overwhelmed by the pronchial chought…

    I was going to go on, but the difficulty spelling couch SO poorly has frozen my brain. Ouch. Which does, in fact, rhyme with couch.

    Adores: 1
  17. 2009 September 28
    Just Me permalink

    See, this is the result of public schools ceasing to teach phonics. There is no way in hell any kid who slaved away on those worksheets day after day would think that a word that is pronounced “cowch” could possibly be spelled c-o-u-g-h-t.

    Adores: 1
  18. 2009 September 28

    A cought/chought is obviously a speshul lolspeak kinda Fronch Presuhdenchal “cot.” Right?

    (I recently discovered this site because I work for another classifieds site, but now I am addicted to YSaC. Such cleverness in the comments. And, it’s nice to have all the CL inanity in one place for easiest consumption! Thanks!)

    Adores: 1
  19. 2009 September 28

    I find myself wondering what professions allow a person to get far enough in life to own a $3200 piece of furniture without having any ability whatsoever to read or write.

    All I could come up with was “hooker” and “trophy wife” (which really just == an upscale hooker.)

    Any other suggestions?

    Adores: 7
    • 2009 September 28
      Canio6 permalink

      Member of Congress fits that description I think.

      Adores: 4
    • 2009 September 28
      bonni permalink

      Teenage country singer?
      Typical professional football player?
      Drug abuser?
      All of the above?

      Adores: 2
      • 2009 September 29
        Kagenin permalink

        More like Baseball player – at least most Football players go through college (even if they were asleep through English class…). Baseball players tend to be far less… eloquent in interview.

        Adores: 0
    • 2009 September 29
      sarajean80 permalink

      Pimp?
      Lottery winner?

      Adores: 0
  20. 2009 September 28
    Procrastinator permalink

    Actually, it should be 208 words that end in “ght”–I subtract points for “claught”, “sticktight” and “dogfought”, because there is no MW definition for the first two and no one uses the past tense of “dogfight”, which is the definition of “dogfought.”

    Why do I review the list of 211 words that end in “ght”? Well, I am the Procrastinator…

    Adores: 5
    • 2009 September 29
      Cled permalink

      Why do I review the list of 211 words that end in “ght”?

      So that we others don’t have to.

      Thank you for your service.

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 September 30
        Procrastinator permalink

        I live to serve. But not protect.

        Adores: 2
  21. 2009 September 28

    I grew up in Montreal, and”French Pervential” accurately describes who you’ll find on Public Transit. And they often ask you to turn around and couch.

    Adores: 6
    • 2009 September 28

      Yes, “Voulez-vouz couch avec moi,” they’re always asking…

      Adores: 10
  22. 2009 September 29
    Windrose permalink

    Can’t stop laughing long enough to think of something to say!

    Adores: 1
  23. 2009 November 15
    Catherine permalink

    Well, you haven’t quite reached the end of the internet until you’ve gone here: http://www.wwwdotcom.com.

    Adores: 0

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