YSaC, Vol. 320: Ice cream does fix everything.
Elle, who was also responsible for the “Free blowdry and style” submission, sent this one in. It got flagged almost immediately, but luckily she’d taken a screenshot:
Click here for a larger version, and be confused for a while. The two pictures themselves are like those puzzles in Highlights magazines where you were supposed to spot the differences between the two pictures: The hair comb! The green thing! The white/grey square blob to the right of the pink thing just above his head! Find and collect them all!
Elle says, “I have so many questions. What/where is GUATSUSNAKE? Who is “HE”? Are they offering up an unemployed/retired person? A snake? Why did they include two almost-identical Photoshopped photos? Is that a mannequin? A dead body? Is there anything that ice cream doesn’t fix?
This may have put me off Craigslist forever.”
Here, I’ll save you the trouble — here’s a link to a Google search for “guatsusnake“. You’ll notice that nothing comes up. (I’m hoping the search engines will catch the word quickly enough that it will link back here by the time this post goes up!)
In other words: Nope, I’ve got nothing.
I’m disappointed that clicking on the picture doesn’t actually bring anything up. You tricked me! *shakes fist*
Sorry — it’s fixed now.
Agree with Sarah, I want to see the bigger version of the picture. (my eyesight sucks)
I wish more things were ice-cream powered. Besides GUATSUSNAKE and my girlfriend.
I like that the google search says “Did you mean: goatsnake”
Of course. I always mean goatsnake.
The best part is that there are not one, but TWO hits for goatsnake! Google has caught up with YSaC, though. It’s the first (and only) hit after the suggested alternate spellings.
Yay! That was my hope. I wanted to be a Googlewhack for Guatsusnake. (Okay, technically a Googlewhack has to have two words, but … )
Now that we have classic snark time…I’d like you to know that Google doesn’t even provide alternate spellings, it just brings up a bunch of YSaC pages and/or references to YSaC (yes, I re-googled to see).
I did the same, and was also very pleased to see several YSaC pages and nothing else. 🙂
I can’t see the larger image either. Damnit! I need to find out what a GUATSUSNAKE is!
Go directly to the image URL to see the bigger image:
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/320.jpg
I think that picture is going to give me nightmares now…. It does kind of look like a dead body being swallowed up in a pile of garbage in someone’s shed. Great tip Nick, I just wish I hadn’t clicked on the link.
Seems pretty clear to me. His wife has had enough. Just come pick him up and you can have this beautiful… um… fascinating… um… unique… um… ice cream-powered livingroom lounger for your very own.
At least they didn’t say “fried chicken” instead of ice cream.
When I read GUATSUSNAKE I tried figuring it out like you’d figure out random license plate combos. I came up with some misspelling of “Gonna gets yous nake” – maybe implying this fabulous offering is for a man to get you naked?
i am so confused!
So grateful you have a “WTF?!” tag for these occasions
they are referencing the fact that he is black, they’re racist.
What?
I didn’t hear any snark in that whatsoever. Foolish, pugnacious and downright rude. The only racists I know are people who always cry, ‘Racist’ at everyone.
Racist! OH SHI-
Did you mean: goatsnake
a Googlewhack has been born
all are still confused
This alone makes revisiting old posts worth it – YSaC haiku!
This is still confusing.
Also, it’s weird to see a post with only 19 (now 20, I guess) comments. I’ve gotten so used to 200+ comments as a usual occurrence.
In my 5 yr-old child’s world, ice cream and chocolate fixes everything. I hope this means I don’t have to start calling my child “Guatsusnake” now.
P.S. I like this travel back in time.
I’m pleased with the time travel as well. Also, I still haven’t read every single YSaC post so maybe one will come up that I somehow missed (although if it’s a classic or a favorite, perhaps not, I’ve read most of those).
Nothing like a well-deserved sabbatical to recharge the o’l batteries. Bon voyage, and bees be upon you both……..
*sniffs* Ah, the smell of classic snark. I dunno, commenting on these visits to the past kind of makes me feel like I’m vandalizing a historic monument or something. Get some well deserved rest, you crazy kids.
Break out the vintage crisco!
Good Morning, Snarkers! In stead of a tree this year, I got us this lovely guatsusnake! Let’s get out the lights and ornaments and make the place look cheery.
I’ve got some blinking lights that would look great, and a box of those icicle thingies that are really just tiny strips of mylar that will wrap around the vacuum cleaner brush for the next eight months. Mary Beesmas!
I was going to suggest that we use flocking, but it may not be safe for everyone here.
Well, I know the cats are going to eat the mylar tinsel, and flocking isn’t safe from a sheep. But what the heck, it’s Beesmas! Put it all on.
But slugs are so boooriiing!
Time for the cats to make some sparkle-poop!
I like the notion that racism explains this post. So if the man in the photograph were Caucasian, the ad would make perfect sense?
I also like that someone appears to have drawn boots/mittens onto the feet in the photo on the left. Nothing like mittens to keep your feet warm.
Maybe the man has opposable toes, so it makes perfect sense for him to wear mitten-socks. On the other
foothand, maybe the artist is just anatomically challenged.Also, FF does not think opposable is a word. I’m confused.
The other day, Mr. Brazil and I discovered that Firefox doesn’t think licensure is a word. Due to Mr. Brazil’s ESL-ness, he thought I’d spelled it wrong (I was editing a professional email for him). I had to show him in the dictionary.
I also like the olden days when the Llamanun made more appearances to the worshipers at Fatima and the 40 Watt. Bees Always Be Upon Her.
I wonder why they “needed” him to begin with. I also wonder about the two pictures… does having a Christmas tree and a blue bow make him more appealing? I really don’t need anything else that sleeps all day and eats all my ice cream — I already have kids for that.
While I’m rambling, since I’m commenting on something dated a year ago, does that mean that, for today at least, I’m a year younger?
No, but as you travel through time, that clock in San Dimas is still running, so you keep aging.
Doesn’t it go backwards though? Shirley there has to be a benefit to this trip.
Bill and Ted reference FTW, and don’t call me Shirley.
On the bright side, we can pretend that Graham T and HHNF are still regulars.
I know, I know, Dan and drmk need their downtime, BBUT. And I echo christina, a national treasure that I am now smudging with my hashbrown greasy fingers.
mmmm — hashbrowns.
Homemade hashbrowns. Eggs sunny side up. And BACON!
I have outdoor work to do today.
I had hashbrowns with onions this morning along with my chicken-fried steak and sausage cream gravy, scrambled eggs, and a fresh biscuit (also with sausage cream gravy). For lunch I’m having a heart attack.
Ha ha ha. Everyone had such dumb hair and clothes in 2009.
Hey! I still have some of my clothes from 2009!
Well, mostly because they still fit and I could really care less about fashion trends as long as it’s comfortable and doesn’t hurt my eyes.
I still have a few clothing items from highschool ( I graduated in 2000 )
I still have a few clothing items from high school too, and I only graduated one year after you.
Heck, I’ve still got a few clothing items from high school, and I graduated in 1992.
Though granted, they’re things I rarely wore then, that my folks found in their closets while cleaning out their house (like my letter jacket from the X-C Ski Team).
One year at Brownie day camp someone goofed and ordered adult sized t-shirts. So I still have (and wear) a t-shirt that I got when I was 6. Ok, so I only wear it to sleep in, but still.
*harumph*
I most certainly did not have dumb hair and clothes in 2009. I had exactly the same hair and clothes that I do now. Even the same nail polish. I fail to see the problem.
Oh, wait…
Have to get on the road presently; and the question of whether the pile of junk is ice cream powered, or that there is some robotoy pictured, or whether the figure shown is a mannikin or coproreal (with no bias towards life status), or even connected with the photo or ad at all, remains irresolved.
All I can offer is a stab at
If the leading “g” is not soft, and this is a derived word, then
Ju + aht + sue + nah + kay
Nope, got nothing.
Maybe the last vowel is long
guh + ahts + oose + nah + key
Perhaps this is from Central America, then
hooWHATs + ah + knock + eh
But, who can know what goes through a spark’s head before being trashed by autocorrect on the borrowed phone? (One suspects that The Shadow is still in therapy for even a glimmer . . .)
Adieu, mes amies
Adieu? Are you leaving us forever?
À bientôt! 😉
This is exactly what the past needed, Cap’n Mac Explains Everything. 8)
‘Twas the night before Beesmas, and ALLLLLLL through the lounge,
Not a creature was sober, not a full cup was found.
And I in my feathers, all preened and in line,
had just poured myself a flask full of wine.
Take it away, Snarkers! 8)
The presents were placed ‘neath the blue tarp with care
In hopes that the Llamanun soon would be there.
With Smedley in his watchcap and Windrose on the tree
Andie danced round to a version of “Born Free”.
The snarkers were dipping the Not.A.Lionel cheesehead
While delusions of mine hores were rapidly spread.
When up from the closet there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my beanbag to see what’s the matter.
And what to my blurry eyes did appear,
A guatsusnake, flat-backed: he had too much cheer.
I guess Lara may never learn that she was in the box today. However, here’s her Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Guatsusnake! (look, it’s listed as the location!)
when you do the google search now it brings up this weird “adolescence girls” link that has a weird mix of porn and random things from this site… fucking creepy.