YSaC, Vol. 1769: Federal Burrow of Investigation

2014 October 15

Free burrow pick up only


Free burrow all wood it’s in good condition nothing is broken as far as drawers or anything just needs cosmetic work just sanding, painted and new drawer handles. First person to respond gets it only serious people please respond.

Hello. I am a very serious person. I would like to pick up your all wood burrow. However, I am confused. A “burrow” is a hole, is it not? It is difficult to pick up an absence of thing. For that matter, how do you know the hole is an absence of wood? It could be an absence of molybdenum, or cheddar cheese. This is important to me, because I am a serious person.

Of course, you could have just misspelled “burro.” Are you selling a donkey? Because I don’t think I want to try sanding a donkey. That would be insufficiently serious.

Thank you for this serious post, Christine!

30 Responses leave one →
  1. 2014 October 15
    MissMommyNiceNice permalink

    I see I will need to burrow my burro into the bureau and inform the appropriate bureaus. Good morning, homonyms!

    Adores: 8
  2. 2014 October 15
    CapnMac permalink

    It’s a Trap!
    A real Ishian burro would have draws, not illustrators.

    I might have fallen for that Greek horse.

    Or that Welsh rarebit.

    But Not Again!

    Adores: 7
  3. 2014 October 15
    Ralph permalink

    I can’t believe the Weasleys didn’t keep this. Did it get infested with gnomes again?

    And as a historical landmark I expect there is all kinds of paperwork required from the Ministry of Magic. Does Chester still work there?

    Adores: 3
  4. 2014 October 15

    Free borough all hipsters it’s in good condition nothing is broken as far as buildings or anything just needs cosmetic work just widening of I-278, painted and refurbishment of the subways. First person to respond gets it only serious people please respond.

    Adores: 3
    • 2014 October 15
      MissMommyNiceNice permalink

      DAMMIT! I knew their was a borough I was forgetting! My op should say “borough’s bureau”!

      Adores: 1
  5. 2014 October 15
    Tigprincess permalink

    i need to confirm that your definition of ‘cosmetic work’ doesn’t overlap with mine of ‘needs complete rebuild’. Please post picture. Also, is made of sapient pear wood? It’s the pickup only aspect I’m worried about, most of the rest of my furniture is static. Sounds a bit like The Luggage to me. Have you ever seen it with feet? Many feet? Moving? Just asking ….

    Adores: 5
  6. 2014 October 15

    I’d get this, but I believe it’d clash with my frainch prudential chester draws.

    Adores: 4
  7. 2014 October 15

    So wrong, I laughed my burro off!

    Adores: 1
  8. 2014 October 15
    Ralph permalink

    Serious or not, NASA keeps getting its Mars Rovers stuck. They forgot the old advice: Neither a lander nor a burrower be.

    And even if they bring it back, the price of the replacement drawer handles is out of this world.

    Adores: 5
    • 2014 October 15
      nojazzhere permalink

      “Just need cosmetic work just sanding, painted and new drawer handles”

      ….are we talking about Meg Ryan now?

      Adores: 2
  9. 2014 October 15

    Is it big enough to set my record player on? Because I really like listening to burrowq music.

    (Okay I think we’re now officially scraping the bottom of the barrel for “burrow” jokes.)

    Adores: 2
    • 2014 October 15
      camille permalink

      If it ain’t burrowq, don’t fix it.

      Adores: 3
  10. 2014 October 15
    HamCan permalink

    Jackass

    Adores: 3
  11. 2014 October 15
    Ralph permalink

    I can’t keep it, but I might borrow the burrow with a burro from the borough bureau for a burrowq bachanalia.

    Brother, can you paradigm?

    Adores: 5
  12. 2014 October 15
    Supreme Ruler permalink

    If you can pick up a burrow that means it’s portable. I really, really want a portable hole.

    Adores: 2
    • 2014 October 15
      Demon Duck of Doom permalink

      I have a portable hole. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

      Adores: 6
  13. 2014 October 15
    Ninja Chow permalink

    If Sparky means burro maybe we should hook him up with the budding Norman Bates from Monday. I’m sure all the pups out there would be grateful if he tried a different species.
    Okay, I’m still suffering some PTSD from that post, I’m going back under the bed now.

    Adores: 1
    • 2014 October 16
      CapnMac permalink

      [aside]
      Cool Avatar, Yay!
      [/aside]

      Adores: 1
      • 2014 October 16
        Ninja Chow permalink

        [aside]
        Thanks Capn!
        [/aside]

        Adores: 1
  14. 2014 October 15

    Wholly Cwap! I forgot to punch C””J! Ms. From Behind . . . Suddenly, Punchity Punch Punch!

    Ow, those quotes really hurt!

    Good Morning, Lender Bees!

    Adores: 3
  15. 2014 October 15
    Demon Duck of Doom permalink

    Free! Burrow all wood!

    All the termites in the house just perked up. But they want to know what percentage of the pickup is actually wood. Sounds like a trap to drive them out of town.

    Adores: 2
  16. 2014 October 15
    Demon Duck of Doom permalink

    Okay…… so I’ve been schooled by the Llamanun to grudgingly accept that “needs painted” is considered acceptable usage in some parts of the US, but when you throw “sanding” into the same sentence, you’re just taunting my inner grammar Nazi.

    You can’t have it both ways, Sparky!

    Adores: 3
    • 2014 October 15

      Interestingly*, “needs painted” would also be perfectly acceptable in Scotland.

      *Interest not guaranteed.

      Adores: 2
  17. 2014 October 15
    One Moving Violation permalink

    I used to have a pick up only just like you, then I took a burrow to the knee.

    Adores: 1
  18. 2014 October 15
    Brer Fox permalink

    It’s obviously a pick-up you can drive into the ground. Rust abounds. That is why it needs cosmetic help. But who needs drawer handles when you don’t wear drawers?

    *blink, blink*

    No, seriously. Who?

    Adores: 1
  19. 2014 October 15
    MandaB permalink

    Free ass it’s in good condition nothing is broken as far as drawers or anything just needs cosmetic work and new love handles. First person to respond gets it.

    Just a few minor tweaks and it’s a personals ad. I’m thankful my ass has never broken my drawers. My work here is done.

    Adores: 4
  20. 2014 October 15
    123456 permalink

    Is the burrow sold ‘ass-is’?

    Adores: 3
    • 2014 October 16
      nojazzhere permalink

      Honest Injun….another teacher just sent out an email asking if someone had an Iphone 4 charger that he could burrow.

      Adores: 3
      • 2014 October 16
        MissMommyNiceNice permalink

        Shut up!

        Adores: 2
        • 2014 October 16
          nojazzhere permalink

          OK

          Adores: 1

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