YSaC, Vol. 1648: Velour Goldmine
2014 January 6
free gold mine!!!!!!
FREE TO MANY THINGS TO POST ALL.PLANTS PICTURE FRAMS TVS TABLES BEDS CLEANING STUFF VASES RADIO FLAG BIKES HURRY FAST!!!! what ever is on or near the porch is free. please hurry fast!
I’m a bit puzzled on the urgency here. Do you think there’s REALLY a critical time limit on excavating whatever particular piece of crap you’re interested in from this particular “gold mine?” Is there an imminent risk of cave-in? Will a mob of zombies appear in twenty minutes if I don’t build a shelter?
Or has Sparky here just been snorting Pixi Sticks?
Still, I could use a good picture fram. Maybe I better hustle.
Thanks for the post, Jason!
I’m voting for home-made pixie-stiks.
Particularly if the, ahem, shafts or adits of this excavation include a FRAM.
Admittedly, Spark’ may be referring to an entire line of motor-vehicle accessories rather than a 2700 ton destroyer having undergone a Force Revitalization And Modernization. Even though that latter was used to free many things.
An now, I must away into the ugliness which is Monday, exacerbated by Minnesota-levels of non-seasonal cold.
Grandpa was a NAPA man, I’ll pass on the FRAM.
NAPA = Never A Part Available.
FRAM = Forget Repairs Any More.
SOMEBODY wants to clear someone else’s crap out of the house before they come home from the bar completely plastered again.
That’s my guess. 😀
I see these items are free to many. Will I be able to get the moldy items I desire or will I be forced to fight ravenous crowds of consumerist mad zombies in an epic battle of power and strength? If that’s the case, I’ll need to find someone to trade my gently used cloth diapers for a chainsaw and a machete first. BRB.
Isn’t Free to Many Things IF’s Lynyrd Skynyrd/The Things mash-up band?
….”please hurry fast!”…..estranged wife is coming to pick up the rest of her stuff…..she can have the crap, but I’ll be damned if I’ll let her have the good stuff….
alternatively: “the housing authority said they’d be back this afternoon with a condemnation notice…”
As opposed to hurrying some other way?
If whatever is on or near the porch is free, does that mean I can take the house? It’s very near the porch.
Good news! Most trailers are on wheels so it will be easy to drag away!
Hey! Don’t be dragging my home away.
Velour Goldmine is my Bee Gees cover band.
Tits aside, in an old gold mine buried somewhere under the immanent fram and the hurry fast are probably tons of toxic waste. You need to do at least a Phase One Environmental Assessment under CERCLA to avoid liability if this becomes a Superfund site. This hustle could cost you plenty if you don’t.
There’s always a catch when you get involved in surreal estate.
Surreal Estate is the name of my Blue Man Group/Sunny Day Real Estate mashup band.
I bet all you really get is the shaft.
Just the tip.
MissMommy…which do you recommend….15 or 20% ?
18.5
Free to POST.
Free to PLANT
S.Free to PICTURE.
Free to FRAME
S. (okay, so I corrected the spelling on this one)Free to
TVS. (huh? what?)Free to TABLE
S.Free to BED
S.Free to CLEAN
ING.Free to STUFF.(stuff what stuff where?)
Free to VASES. (can vases be used as a verb?)”She vases all of the time. Yesterday, she vased her aluminum plant.”
Free to RADIO. (oh sure, I radio every day)
Free to FLAG.
Free to BIKE
S.(I’ve never biked on more than one bike at a time)Free to HURRY.
Free to FAST.
I can understand why this was posted on YSaC. Not much of this makes sense. Besides, THINGS are nouns, not verbs. Although verbs are things.
Okay, now I’m confused.
The time has come, ol’ Sparky said,
To free to many things,
To tables, beds and cleaning stuff,
To cabbages and kings,
And why we have to hurry fast,
And whether frams have frings.
I’ve seen Treasure of the Sierra Madre, and this is no gold mine.
Stinking badgers, maybe . . .
In that case, never mind. We don’t need no stinking badgers.
True, not with a whole tribe of ferrets running around.
It has been said that “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.” I think in this case, one man’s “treasure” is just a pile of crap!
There are two words missing from the title.
“[The] free gold [is] mine!!!!!!”
Fixed it for you.
This looks like the haunted basement in Paranormal Activity 2. So are the demonic ghosts free too? Is that why you have to hurry fast? Before you are dragged screaming down the stairs or are possessed?
I want to apologize for my failure to update the box lately. I will get to it. Really. 8)
That’s it, you’re fired!
Oh, wait, can you fire volunteers?
With a match or a cannon. 8)
Windy…don’t apologize….just say you were hurrying (fast) to get to Sparky’s gold mine (on or near the porch) before all the good (sic) stuff was gone….no one would fault you for that….
But Jazzy, no one would believe it!
Let me have my fantasy that no one at YSaC thinks I would fall for a Sparky ad, okay?
What else am I forgetting? Wow, look at all the dust on the Punch-o-Matic! Hmmm. . .
TC and ghostcat, stand over here, please. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Day, Niners!