old dirt in any cond
anything from the 60,s 70,s 80,s thank you, ###-###-####
Um. Being dirt – if you really want it from a specific period, it might be good if you specified which millennium you were interested in, not just the decade. Just sayin’.
Thanks, Mike!
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I’m wondering what section of CL this was posted within–makes a difference if it was in Trade/Barter or, [shudder] Missed Connections . . .
I’m not sure how deep they had to dig to find this one…
?
??
???
I have vintage dirt and antique dirt, both of which will cost you more.
Vintage dirt is so last millenium. I won’t settle for anything less than cruelty-free, organic, free-range artisanal dirt hand crafted by the indigenous peoples of Ish and fortified with Omega-3.
I guess I need to have my glasses checked…I read that as “old dude in any cond—-anything from the 60,s 70,s 80,s thank you, ###-###-####.” Thought I had me a live one….darn!
Should be pretty easy to tell them apart. Dirt from the 60s contains traces of LSD and free love. Dirt from the 70s commonly has threads from corduroy and/or bell-bottoms. Dirt from the 80s contains buried unsold Atari E.T. cartridges.
Hooray, we get to play in the dirt today!
I’ll go get my TONKA™ trucks.
I call dibs on the front end loader!
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
According to the Urban Dictionary … yes.
*looks around all shifty*
DETRITUS!
*Runs away*
For those who need a refresher, our day of detritus started here and ended with the Cat Mafia being quilted.
Watch your mouth!
Jus’ talkin’ ’bout detritus.
I can dig it.
Because I have a pillaging shovel and a pail.
I have dirt from 1670. It’s pure, genuine Ottum dirt!
Let’s see, I think I have some.
Carl Wilson was a coke addict.
Gary Glitter was a pedophile.
Jodie Foster is gay.
Yeah, and I can’t believe Liberace was gay! I mean, women loved him. I didn’t see that coming.
WAIT A MINUTE!!!!!…Liberace?…gay???? How absurd!!!!! next thing you’ll be claiming Rock Hudson was gay!!!! you revisionist historians make me sick!!!!…Now, Noel Coward..that’s different.
Richard Chamberlain. Dr. Kildaire and Shogun for cripes sake!
And don’t get me started on what a man Raymond Burr was. Now he was a litigator!
Raymond Burr was a man?!? I thought he was an exceptionally eloquent elephant seal!
Oh be-hayve!
If Sparky were a real connoisseur, he would be pickier about condition. I mean, there’s just no comparison between collector-grade minty dirt and badly-cared-for dirt that’s just been allowed to sit around getting dirty.
Tell me about it! I mean, who would want to buy dirt that had just been left laying on the ground outside?
And there isn’t much of a market for dirt-condition mint, is there?
I have dirt on Happy Days. The Fonz was really afraid to ride a motorcycle.
Then there is that entire show, Space: 1999.
And oh, don’t even get me started on the Terminator.
I’ve kept this stuff buried for a long time.
If you want this dirt, you haul, and make sure you bring someone to help load it. I have a bad back.
The dirt I used in the ’70’s and ’80’s, my pa used back in the 1950’s.
And his pa used the same dirt back in the ’30’s. Great gramps used it back near the turn of the century. Now, they all conditioned it with horse manure, cow manure, and pig manure. I never used those conditioners on the dirt when I started using it. I used the dirt to ride my motorcycle on and burying umm, never mind. You can’t have my dirt unless you want it from before 1971.
Why would anybody want dirt from the 1970’s? Everybody knows that Disco Dirt sucks.
Well, you can smell by the way I don’t use my soap,
I’m a dirty man: no time to wash.
Stink is bad when it is warm, I’ve worn these socks
Since I was born.
And now it’s all right. it’s ok.
And you may look the other way.
You can try to understand
The dirts effect on man.
Whether you’re a brother or whether you’re a mother,
You’re smellin’ my funk, smellin’ my funk.
Feel your eyes leakin’ and everybody pukin’,
And were smellin’ my funk, smellin’ my funk.
Uh, uh, uh, ugh, smellin’ my funk, smellin’ my funk.
Uh, uh, uh, ugh, smellin’ my funk.
You know, I think there’s dirt on EVERYBODY over in the corner.
Digi, SHHH! That’s secret dirt! What happens in the corner stays in the corner.
Digital Axis…please clarify…do you mean everyone in the corner has deep,dark secrets in their past,…or they just need to be hosed down?
Yes.
That’s an absolute definite maybe.
*shifty glance*
…
:attempts shifty glance:
Dangit, why won’t they move?
:eyeballs begin to make grinding noises:
Ahh, they’re stuck! I hate manual drives!
Just pop ’em out and squeegee them with a little WD-40. If you feel self conscious, you can pop in a couple of grapes in the meantime (but be warned, that gives you California Raisinvision)
That would explain why everything suddenly looks like Plasticine clay.
You should say, “Awww”, and then cast them somewhere.
I need some old dirt and some young dirt.
The power of loam compels you!
The power of loam compels you!
Quick, let the puppy outside in the dirt before he uses the carpet!
Hey, wait a minute.
ALL YOUR DIRT ARE BELONG TO US!
The Meek shall inherit the dirt.
Inherit?! Inherit?! That’s all we’ve got now. Dirt soup, Dirt cakes, dirt bread, clay houses, and Carrot Top for entertainment.
Dirt soup? We would have loved to have had dirt soup! We had to settle for a packet of cold gravel!
Like, if you are as old as dirt, you could be in any condition.
I think I’ve mentioned playing with a casket in the past. If I had buried it in the dirt instead of the snow, perhaps my past would still be buried.
(That was in 1972, so I still stand by my pre-1971 dirt.)
Well, Wikipedia informs me that there was a British Anarcho-Punk band called “DIRT” once… Maybe Sparky is a collector.
Digi, this is just our little secret. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Dirty Deeds!