YSaC, Vol. 981: And if an INTERESTING monster can’t have an INTERESTING hairdo, he can have this.

2011 May 4

Not too far from where I grew up is the town of Boring, Maryland.* I was always vastly amused by this. “Visit Boring!” my mental ad campaign began, followed by: “See the Boring citizens! The Boring roads! The Boring post office!”

Well, now you can have the next best thing:

Boring Tools – $1200


Ditch Witch RotoWitch – Never Used, Great Condition, Accessories Optional
Model RW
Retails for over $3,000.

“Honey, can you go [do whatever it is one does with one of these things], please? I’ve been asking you for weeks.”
“Sigh. I would, but the tool is just so uninteresting… I can’t get motivated.”

Update: Actually, I just found a picture of this thing:

Maybe it’s just the Y chromosome talking, but this doesn’t look boring at all… it looks awesome!

Thanks for the post, Mark. We should also note for the record that it does not, in fact, suck.

*Note: this is true.

171 Responses leave one →
  1. 2011 May 4
    Lola permalink

    Boring Guy – Free to good any home

    Ditching This Whiny Bitch – Never Worked, Great Condition from playing Wii Tennis all day, Accessories Optional (but please take his ugly furniture and “art”)
    Model RW (Rarely worth it)
    Has cost me over $3,000.

    Adores: 17
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      Oh…we have so much in common! Except my guy was Model RA (Rude Awakening).

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4
      tigprincess permalink

      You were dating my ex? but hang on, aren’t you in USA and we are / were in UK?
      Fortunately (for me) he is now marrying some poor/ rich witch / woman ….

      @drmk – Yea! my avatar is back now I’m on my ‘home’ machine! x

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4

        It’s a pretty common model these days.

        Unfortunately, due to its weird popularity with the women, Jerk™ (Now with more ego!) has been widely distributed globally and can be found translated into every language.

        Growing up I didn’t get many dates because I wasn’t enough of a Jerk™, I was always in Friend Town (Not as cool as Funky Town) because I was, apparently, too nice. Which suggests that one must have to be a pretty big Jerk™ in order to qualify, as I was am a sarcastic jackass most of the time.

        The problem with Jerk™, though, is that their inane charm can only hide their nature for a few months/years. After that you end up having to sell them on Craigslist before you’re forced to bludgeon them with the blunt side of a splitting wedge.

        C’est la vie.

        Adores: 7
      • 2011 May 4
        Lola permalink

        tig – fortunately, that ad’s a bit of fiction, though based on the observations of friends’ experiences. The only unemployed males who have been allowed to move in to my residence, ever, have both been cats.

        Adores: 3
  2. 2011 May 4

    Yeah, I was like…huh? Even I…with a decided lack of Y….knew what a ditch witch was. It’s like the time we had a concrete crushing machine parked RIGHT outside my office building, and it spent several days pounding and breaking up the sidewalk to make way for a new one.

    Every man in the company stood with his face pressed to the glass in the door at one time or another just to watch this amazing piece of heavy equipment.

    The comments ranged from “Awesome!” to “I have GOT to get me one of those.”

    Machines=awesomesauce

    I guess it’s a guy thing, all that damned machine gave me was a headache.

    Adores: 7
    • 2011 May 4

      One of our customers has a Shelby Cobra convertible that he drives when it’s warm. The muffler’s so loud you can hear it down the block and any time that thing shows up in the parking lot, every male employee mysteriously vanishes.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4

        OT – Storytime!

        Everyone gather round, sit on the bacteria-laden festive storytime carpet circle!

        Taco, stopping pulling the ghostiecat’s tail!

        Alright now…here we go…

        Many years ago, when legislation was enacted to empty our wallets clean up emissions from vehicles, we were faced with having to replace the catalytic converter on my hubby’s pick-em-up truck.

        I took it to the local shop to have it done where the guy behind the counter kept trying to sell me a whole system, complete with “glass packs”.

        I, being a definite X, said, “Wha…?”

        “Glass packs…they, um…well, they’re part of the exhaust system and a lot of pickup trucks have them?”

        “Why?”

        “Why?”

        “Yeah, what purpose do they serve?”

        “Purpose?”

        Leaning forward on the counter, and speaking slowly, I said, “Yes, p-u-r-p-o-s-e. What purpose do the serve? Will I get better gas mileage?”

        “Uh, no.”

        “Cooler running temps for the engine in the Texas heat?”

        “Nope.”

        *sigh*

        “You see ma’am..well, they are LOUD…no, really, really LOUD.”

        “And this is necessary because………..”

        Sheepishly grinning the guy shrugs, “I guess it’s a guy thing. So, um…you probably aren’t interested, right?”

        “Right.”

        Adores: 16
        • 2011 May 4
          Bombdude permalink

          You know, it’s a funny thing… I am a gearhead*, and I currently own a 1971 Chevrolet Camaro with a pretty stout, built engine, and a lot of go-fast goodies. I have owned numerous late ’60s and early ’70 “musclecars” and have yet to actually install a loud exhaust system, on purpose. I owned one (a 1969 Mustang Mach One) that had a pair of glasspacks on it when I bought it, but I don’t accept the blame for that… I have had numerous queries as to why I don’t have a “loudmouth” (yes, that’s actually the marketing name for a particular exhaust system that is known for it’s audible volume) exhaust setup on my car.

          “Dude”, says I, “I rarely am doing the speed limit, and I drive a car that catches the eye. Why would I invite the otherwise occupied LEO (whether ticketing some other unfortunate Mario Andretti wannabe, or doing a doughnut) to place his attention on me, based on the fact that he can hear me coming a mile away?!?! That’s why I painted my car silver, rather than a bright flashy color! I want to slide under the radar (pun absolutely and completely intended), not smack it over the head!”

          *one who likes old muscle/show cars and likes to do his own mechanical tinkering.

          Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        Lara permalink

        I have a neighbor who likes to park outside my apartment at 1 am and rev his extremely loud car and then zooms away just as loudly.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          That’s why rocks were made.

          Adores: 5
        • 2011 May 4

          And why BB guns were invented.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          Wrist rockets.

          Crossbows?

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4
          Windrose permalink

          Moira!!!!!!

          Adores: 0
    • 2011 May 4

      It is a guy thing. The bigger, noisier, more destructive a machine is, the more we want it. It’s on the 89th unpaired gene on the Y tail.

      Adores: 5
      • 2011 May 4
        Angel permalink

        When I hear something that loud, all I can think is, “Thank God it doesn’t live next door to me!”

        Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        Addicted Reader permalink

        Many doors for giving a “biological” explanation.

        Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        Yeah, this is pretty much a guy’s ultimate example of machine porn. (Well, that doesn’t involve the uncanny valley, anyway.)

        Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4
          Bombdude permalink

          Oooooh!! I want one!

          I don’t know what I’d do with it yet, but it’d look good in my driveway!

          Adores: 3
  3. 2011 May 4

    Boring doesn’t only mean uninteresting, that would be boring as in to bore a hole.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      Well, you see….here at YSaC, we prefer the Robert Frost Method of reading and like to take the path least traveled (aka The Low Road).

      Thanks for reminding us that our brains don’t always spin clockwise.

      Adores: 12
    • 2011 May 4
      tigprincess permalink

      ‘No shit Sherlock!’ as we say here in UK … thanks for the BGOTO*

      *BGOTO = Blinding Glimpse Of The Obvious*

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        Artsy Computer Geek permalink

        We say that in the US too.

        XY you forgot the [cory] tags.

        Adores: 1
    • 2011 May 4
      SilvaNoir permalink

      Hi, Corey

      (borey corey!)

      Adores: 13
    • 2011 May 4

      [corey] Technically a DitchWitch is a trenching machine, it digs a trench for laying pipes or cables.[/corey]

      Adores: 7
      • 2011 May 4
        mudslicker permalink

        [matt] Righteous indignation!!! [/matt]

        Adores: 9
        • 2011 May 4

          [matte]Mild, yet opinionated statement put out there as a way of clearing things up.[/matte]

          Adores: 5
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          I dunno, Matte resonates as flat to me…

          😉

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4

          You mean to suggest that matte may be a little too… mild?

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          I say, I think he needs to grow a pair. Either opine or stand in the corner Matte! Have some conviction, man!

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          Do we have a [semi-gloss] tag yet?

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4

          Nobody has really taken a shine to it yet, Ghostie.

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          I’m a [satin]* girl myself.

          *satan in Sparkylish

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 May 4

          [satin] and [matte] for walls, [semi-gloss] for wood furniture, [gloss] for table tops, and [high-gloss] for anything that you want to look tacky.

          Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        Lara permalink

        Heh heh heh heh you said laying pipes

        *goes to the corner via a starbucks*

        Adores: 7
        • 2011 May 4

          I was wondering when someone would say something about that 😉

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4
          Bombdude permalink

          I came too late for the finish…

          Wait.. What?!

          Muttering …never needed no ditchwitch to lay no damn pipe…

          :Heads for the corner with a sleeping bag:

          Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4
      CapnMac permalink

      [equipment add-on corey]
      And, in non-sparky circles, the tractor attachment is called an “auger.”

      Which has nothing to do with its predictive ability, but, instead refers to the use of an Archimedean inclined plane-shaped drilling tool.
      (The semi-continuous inclined plane surface helps remove the tailings from the hole, handy when drilling holes in soil.)

      Tractor-mounted auger trivia: Since it is powered from the PTO (Power Take-off) on the tractor, such augers have no “reverse.” If one drills past–around–a rock or bit of ledge or the like, that will not “yank” out, then you need to get a long bar and a couple of stout boys, disconnect the auger bit from the tractor and walk the bit out manually. This is not fun. It also does not get the remaining elebenty holes for fence posts dug, either. It is often an augury of poor drilling to come, too.
      [/corey]

      Adores: 6
    • 2011 May 4

      And this looks nothing like the ditch digger I rented to lay my sprinkler system. That thing had a continuous tread of little shovels and it bucked like a sonofabitch and gave me all kinds of interesting stomach bruises trying to get it to eat through our adobe-ish soil.

      It would not have worked for fence posts.

      I need to do something about my fence posts…

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        We had to rent one a few years ago when our well went dry and we had to have another one dug and new pipe laid to the house. The numerous big rocks on our property meant it went something like;

        1. Turn on machine
        2. Dig with machine
        3. Machine hits rock
        4. Turn off machine
        5. Dig up rock
        6. Move rock
        6b. Use chain and truck to move very large rocks
        7. Turn on machine
        8. Dig with machine
        9. Machine hits rock
        10. Repeat steps 4-9

        That was a fun summer.

        Adores: 8
        • 2011 May 4

          I live in a glacial till area, it’s more like.

          1. Try to dig
          2. Hit rock
          3.Try to dig up rock
          4.Hit more rocks
          5.Give up
          6. Call Bombdude and see if he has any extra ANFO.

          Adores: 10
        • 2011 May 4
          Bombdude permalink

          Dude!!! I got what you need!!!

          Call me!

          Adores: 4
  4. 2011 May 4
    Ah-kun permalink

    I was going to make fun of the word combination of ‘ditch witch’ but Googling confirmed that it was real and killed my joke.

    Perhaps the gentleman selling the tools doesn’t realize how exciting horizontal drilling can be? I mean, who doesn’t like to dig a good hole. Sideways.

    Adores: 13
    • 2011 May 4
      Windrose permalink

      Ah-kun, you seem destined for the corner! Wink wink, nudge nudge, say some more!

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4

      Reads Ah-kuh’s post.

      I’ll be in the corner. Ah-kun’s coming with me.

      *Drags Ah-kun to the corner*

      Coffee Slice?

      Adores: 4
  5. 2011 May 4
    LimeLolly permalink

    Props to dan for the title. I just watched this particular episode of Bugs Bunny last night since it’s one of my favorites.

    Adores: 8
    • 2011 May 4

      I love Gossamer. He’s cute when he’s angry.

      Adores: 7
      • 2011 May 4

        I had a computer game way back when that was based on that episode. The best part was that you could play as Bugs or as Gossamer.

        Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4

        I love that he’s named Gossamer. (I love many other things, too, but the name is particularly wonderful.)

        Adores: 1
  6. 2011 May 4
    mudslicker permalink

    Awww, I was really wanting to buy some Boaring Tools for my pet wild pig. He’s such a weekend warrior and needs to get on with that “honeydew melon” list.

    Adores: 7
    • 2011 May 4

      I gave my ex a “honeydew melon” list, unfortunately he thought honeydew was two words and spelt slightly different and that is why he is no longer allowed in the produce section.

      Adores: 10
      • 2011 May 4

        Oooh…so I assume the Fidelity Bank and Trust closed his account for making a deposit elsewhere?

        They’re a tough creditor, that’s for sure.

        Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4
        Lara permalink

        You know something is wrong with you when you are banned from the produce section at the grocery store.

        Adores: 6
        • 2011 May 4

          That bok choy was asking for it!

          Wait, what are we talking about?

          Adores: 7
  7. 2011 May 4

    I work with a bunch of boring Tools.

    Adores: 21
    • 2011 May 4
      LimeLolly permalink

      My hubby always talks to his stubborn mechanics tools. I don’t know if it’s the threat of being melted down to a pile of raw materials or the fast overhand toss across the garage that makes them start working, but eventually they behave.

      Adores: 17
  8. 2011 May 4

    You know what I think this really is?

    A test.

    A test of the Snark Lounge’s collective ability to make snarkaliciousness out of nothing.

    Well, played Royal Ostrimu, well played indeed.

    Adores: 12
    • 2011 May 4

      In my more active movie riffing days we had the occasional “Riff a good movie” night. Amazingly, a good movie is still pretty easy to Riff as compared to a bad one.

      I think that’s what might be happening here.

      Adores: 3
    • 2011 May 4
      ToBScholarly permalink

      Marking snark out of nothing at all.

      Didn’t Air Supply already do that?

      Adores: 11
      • 2011 May 4

        No, ToB, that was money..they made money out of nothing at all.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4
          ToBScholarly permalink

          Oh – I thought that was the federal government.

          Adores: 5
  9. 2011 May 4
    Ralph permalink

    For you X chromosome types, I suggest this tool.

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      That should take care of my lawn mole problem. They’ll all be smoking Lucky Strikes (LSMFT) after I’m done!

      Adores: 6
    • 2011 May 4

      Oh dear. I don’t know whether to be titillated or frightened!

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        Frightillated.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4
          Addicted Reader permalink

          Nope, just frightened.

          Adores: 0
  10. 2011 May 4

    I don’t care how boring the tools are. I am not going to pay double for tools designed by Philippe Starck or whomever, so you’re just going to have to use these.

    [boring OT comment]I grew up in Maryland, too, but in Kensington.[/boring OT comment]

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4

      [boring OT comment] There’s a Boring, Oregon, too. This is one of the best road signs in Oregon, mainly because Oregon City actually is rather boring…[/boring OT comment]

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        SpaceBug permalink

        Lived in* Boring, Ore. for a few years.

        *Actually about 4 miles out, but had a Boring address.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4

          TotallyUnrelatedCityEnvy….hubby was looking at a tornado map last week – yep, we were one of the states that was visited by Dorothy – and there’s small town east of us called “Gun Barrel City”. Hubby kept going on and on about how cool it would be to say you lived in Gun Barrel City, on S&W or Colt Drive. He was truly disappointed when I told him I had NO desire to move to Gun Barrel City…ever.

          Adores: 6
        • 2011 May 4

          I have a picture of my Mom somewhere standing in front of the city limits sign for Virgin, Nevada.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4
          Lola permalink

          If you ever visit Intercourse,* Pennsylvania, gc, you can take another picture to go alongside that one.

          *Yes, actual town

          Adores: 1
  11. 2011 May 4

    Hmm I dunno. Do you think the Ditch Witch RotoWitch will go with my Markis Parker Trokers?

    Adores: 5
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      As long as you combine them with a HoverRound and a Mantis RotoTiller set on “Weed Whack.”

      Adores: 1
    • 2013 June 23
      CapnMac permalink

      Hmm, RotoWitch boring attachment as trocar . . .

      [corey]Some boring follows the medical model, in that casing is set in the bore hole in the fashion of a trocar, and the drill stem passed through the casing in the manner of a cannula. Drilled water wells, and oil-and-gas wells, follow this model (the casing becoming the delivery construct, emulating a fistula).

      For geotechnical soils testing is different, the drill stem is hollow, to preserve the layers for examination & testing. So, it’s trocar sans cannula. For geologic exploration/research, those bores sometimes use a casing to isolate where the coring drill stem operates–this is especially used for ice boring. This is very much like needle biopsy, where a trocar cannula is used.

      Oh, and since I made the distinction; in days before machinery, wells were “dug” so they had internal dimensions sufficient to operate tools within. A drilled water well is a significant improvement, other than not having a surface fixture from which one might gaze into the depths of the water below. Drilled wells also make Lassie redundant, as, if Timmy falls down a 4″ drill casing, Timmy has rather a different set of problems than a collie can affect effect upon.
      [/corey]

      Adores: 0
  12. 2011 May 4
    Izzybee permalink

    You forgot the Boring Tractor Show. It lived up to it’s name in every way.

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4

      I’ve only been to the Boring Rodeo.

      They didn’t even have a clown.

      Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      The Boring Demolition Derby I went to was a snooze. None of the cars had engines. They just sat there and every once in a while someone would get out and push their car into someone else. Even the mud was unimpressive.

      Adores: 5
  13. 2011 May 4

    Sunday, sunday, SUNDAY! Memorial Auditorium and Ditch Witch II: The Unborer present the Exciting Tools Expo 2011! Come see the latest in incredible, amazing, fantastic tools that won’t “bore” you to tears!

    Concrete saws! (CONCRETE!)
    Ice augers! (ICE!)
    Routers! (ROUTERS!)
    Two-man jackhammers! (TWO MEN!)
    Hole saws! (HOLES!)
    Carbide Forstners! (CARBIIIIIDE!)
    Planers! (PLANES!)
    Belt sanders! (BELTS!)
    Reciprocating saws! (SAWS ALL!)
    Hammer drills! (HAMMER TIME!)
    Caulking guns! (LOOK AT THAT CAULK!)
    Counterbores! [*record needle scratch noise*] (UH-UH! NO BORING TOOLS HERE!)
    [*butt-rock music continues]

    See the zero-turn lawnmower race powered by 80 horsepower diesel engines! (DIESEL!) Watch the two man team of Humbolt & Burbur demolish a log in seconds flat with twin chainsaws, turning it into a giraffe! (AN EVIL GIRAFFE!) Bring the kids and cook wieners over an open arc welder! (WELDED HOT DOGS!) It’s fun for the whole family this sunday, sunday, SUNDAY!

    We’ll sell you the whole seat, BUT YOU’LL ONLY NEED THE EDGER!

    Adores: 16
    • 2011 May 4
      mudslicker permalink

      …nothing runs like a deer (deer!) until Bambi is stopped by a Stihl (Stihl! Stihl! STIHL!).

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4
      Angel permalink

      Weird Al Yankovic’s Hardware Store

      I used the WoW-themed video ’cause it has the lyrics. (And also ’cause my youngest son is sitting here patting at my shoulder saying USE THAT ONE MOOOOOOM! IT’S SO COOOOL! Guess whose kid plays WoW…)

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4
        Artsy Computer Geek permalink

        Angel — give your son a hug from me. I really needed a good laugh today — I loved his choice of music.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4
          Angel permalink

          Will do, Artsy! He sits here and reads YSAC with me a lot and he feels like he knows all of you nice folks. It’s not easy to get a 17-year old to read but he loves to go chase down references he finds on here 🙂

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          :waves:

          Hi, Angel’s son!

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4
          Lola permalink

          Remind him that Astro is about his age. Younger snarkers are welcome!
          *waves at Angel’s son, and the Gila monster-lizard thing*

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 May 4
          Angel permalink

          He was all smiles for the greetings! and sent back a *wave* to everyone.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4

          After trying 3 different ways, I found there is no way to make a TacoThong joke referencing an 18th birthday without channeling huge amounts of Uncle Creepy.

          Instead I give you this graphic depiction of the TacoThong.

          Enjoy.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          I’m gonna regret this…

          :click:

          Huh. I expected something … more impressive.

          Where do you attach the bells?

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4

          On the tail. And one on each paw.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4
          Bombdude permalink

          Oooohh, I know I shouldn’t… but… :click:

          “he’s ruff ‘n’ tuff with his geoffropuffs!”

          Adores: 0
    • 2011 May 4
      Lola permalink

      *clicks Adores repeatedly but futilely*
      Mindfield, I’m really glad I’m back in the office and not taking my turn on the front desk, as that way I can quiver with laughter and make my near-supersonic “heeeeeee-heeeeeee-heeeeee” sounds without attracting weird(er than usual) looks. Honestly, I don’t know what I like best – all that caulk, evil giraffe, or welded hot dogs.

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 May 4

        Evil giraffe.

        Adores: 2
        • 2011 May 4
          Lola permalink

          I dunno, the dainty eyelashes on the hellflame-red eyes detract slightly. The mustache is good, however, along with the menacing brows.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4
          Addicted Reader permalink

          Picky, huh?

          Adores: 0
    • 2011 May 4
      Lara permalink

      I would pay to see someone roast their weiner over an Arc Welder.

      *Throws several Brazilian Doors at MF (DOORS!). Specifically these: http://www.door.cc/Subpages_Wood/BrazilianCherry_wood.html

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4

        The key to a good arc welder wiener roast is not to use too much flux and keep a distance of at least two or three inches so it shrivels evenly.

        Adores: 6
  14. 2011 May 4

    *Sigh*
    Boooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiinnnnggggg!

    *Jumps into the thermal bore hole*

    Adores: 5
    • 2011 May 4

      That’s what she said! For me … to … do. The thermal … bore …

      On second thought, that didn’t work at all. Never mind, carry on.

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4

        Organic Superlube?! It’s great stuff, GREAT STUFF! But you really have to keep your eye on it though, it’ll try to slide away from you the first chance it gets.

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4

          I tried it once. It took me three hours to lose enough velocity that I was able to grab onto something without losing an arm.

          When they say “A little dab’ll do ya” they really aren’t kidding. Do not just slather it on.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4
          Windrose permalink

          http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive/2793

          Adores: 5
  15. 2011 May 4

    [OT]
    Also, man, everyone freaked out on the TacoBlog (think I need to rename it to keep with the Taco[thing in relation to Taco] theme).

    I wasn’t even ready for a formal unveiling and you all drove it up to nearly 90 hits for the day o.O.

    I’m flattered… and scared.

    Also, I can totally see why the dynamic duo uses time delayed postings. I can write a whole bunch when the mood takes me and just queue it all up. Took care of my whole week on Sunday.
    [/OT]

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4

      I only just noticed the link under your name yesterday and dropped by. Everyone’s setting up a blog lately, it’s great. I gotta update my blogroll. Actually, I need a better blogroll widget. Time to go widget diving!

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 May 4

        You can get arrested in California for Widget diving.

        Adores: 5
        • 2011 May 4

          Nah, they repealed that law when they legalized same-widget marriage.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          Same-widget marriage is a slippery slope. Before you know it, people will be marrying thing-a-ma-jigs. Anarchy!

          Adores: 3
    • 2011 May 4
      Artsy Computer Geek permalink

      [OT]
      Taco — I checked out your website yesterday and loved it.
      [/OT]

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        *Bow*
        Thanks Artsy.

        I’m still looking for a more unified theme I think, but I’ll just espouse whatever I can come up with until such a theme takes me by the hand.

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4
          Lurker permalink

          Suggested theme: http://www.funfolly.com/h/mascots/c1812.htm

          Adores: 9
        • 2011 May 4

          You win, dear Lurker.

          *Tosses Adores*

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          ::sniff sniff::

          It smells like nuts!

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4

          AHHHHHH!

          :flees in terror:

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4

          TM – maybe you could expand on what we ALL seem to have in our heads as a “lounge” theme? Call Bacontini, I’ll bet he will be dere for you….and de ladies, always de ladies.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4

          Bacontini could be a guest blogger.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          If only candorman was still here…..*sigh*….

          8)

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 May 4

          Oh!

          Rename my blog to “The Corner!”

          That could be fun!

          Now I just need some topics to fit it!

          Maybe “Innuendo from around the Web: Intended or Not.”

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          In You End-o From Around the Bend-o: Taco Talk!

          Adores: 2
    • 2011 May 4

      I really need to write a blog update. I also need to start working on the blog that will be linked to my law firm. *sigh* Has anyone been working on a mechanism to freeze time? That would really help me out.

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        With my freeze ray I will stop-

        Adores: 5
      • 2011 May 4

        Try emailing Dr. Horrible. I think he finally got the kinks worked out of his Freeze Ray.

        Adores: 2
        • 2011 May 4
          CapnMac permalink

          How is Freeze related to Rachel?

          Adores: 1
      • 2011 May 4

        Bridgete – remind me again, what area of law are you specializing in?

        I have a friend whose daughter is just finishing up her first year @ Georgetown. The poor child’s lost about 20 lbs. from a body that could ill-afford it. She’s going into international law and I hear that it is brutal….I wonder if she’ll make it.

        Kudos to those of you who do stick with it and make the world safe for people like Taco to wear squirrel costumes.

        Make room in the corner!

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 May 4

          Tax law. My practice will specialize in commercial property tax abatements, but I’ll do other tax stuff too.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4

          commercial property tax abatements

          That should be the name of a band.

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 May 4
          Lola permalink

          Tax law is some of the most stunningly dull research I’ve ever had to do, but on the other hand all of the tax attorneys (save one, and he was a definite anomaly) I have known were very nice (actually, that one guy was fairly nice, just super odd). Best of luck getting started, Bridgete!

          As for Astro’s suggestion – tonight only, at the 40 Watt: Commercial Property Tax Abatements, with special guests Letter of Engagement and Attractive Nuisance!
          /legal terminology humor

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 5

          Yeah, even for those of us with an interest in tax law, the research is stunningly dull. But you’re absolutely right, every single tax attorney I’ve ever met/worked with has been really quite nice.

          I really want a shirt that says “Attractive Nuisance”. Also “Tortfeasor”.

          Adores: 0
    • 2011 May 4
      Lara permalink

      I’m going to set up a blog after graduation when I can think again. Right now I am sleeping about 12 hours a night because I finally have some down time. Way to go on the hits Taco. If SisterLyle was here she would probably hit you a few more times for good measure.

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 May 4

        *contemplates the thought of ever sleeping more than 5-6 hrs a night*

        Envy.Envy.Envy.Envy.

        Adores: 4
  16. 2011 May 4
    Windrose permalink

    If this thing is in California, be sure to have it inspected before purchase. We have an infestation of boring weevils.

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4

      I’m picturing a bunch of beetles dressed like hipsters and talking about term life insurance.

      It made me giggle.

      Adores: 6
    • 2011 May 4

      Weevil 1: “What’d ya do today?”
      Weevil 2: “Ate some wheat.”
      Weevil 1: “Cool. Cool. Any plans later?”
      Weevil 2: “Gonna eat some more wheat.”
      Weevil 1: “Cool. Cool. I prefer cotton plants myself.”
      Weevil 2: “I don’t like cotton.”
      Weevil 1: “I don’t like wheat.”
      Weevil 2: *waits*
      Weevil 1: *waits*
      Weevil 2: “Gonna rain.”
      Weevil 1: “Yup.”
      Weevil 2: *waits*
      Weevil 1: *waits*
      Weevil 2: “Well, better get back to my wheat.”
      Weevil 1: “Cool. Cool.”

      Adores: 13
    • 2011 May 4
      Lara permalink

      That’s what they all say. Because Weevil is a fun word.

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 May 4

        Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil Weevil

        WHEEEE!

        Adores: 2
  17. 2011 May 4
    ToBScholarly permalink

    Dan’s description reminded me of a camping trip to Letchworth State Park our family took a few summers ago. It was very scenic, with waterfalls, gardens and a large dam.

    My kids thought it was the greatest thing to walk on the dam road, look at the dam river, view the dam scenery.

    Until my then-8-year-old dropped the F bomb because he didn’t get the joke and thought it was a hall-pass for cursing.

    Sometimes he is a little slow. I blame the Y chromosome.

    Adores: 12
    • 2011 May 4

      [Matt] Why don’t girls get to have an X chromosone? What’s so special about boys that they get one and we females don’t? It’s chromosonal discrimination! [/Matt]

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4
        Artsy Computer Geek permalink

        [Matt Reply]

        Kelli — it probably is some type of discrimination, but I think that in this case it works in our favor.

        [/Matt Reply]

        Adores: 4
      • 2011 May 4

        Um, I think you might mean a “Y” chromosome…

        Adores: 6
        • 2011 May 4
          mudslicker permalink

          Why?

          Apparently the Y Chromosome is the bossy one.

          🙂

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 May 4

          Taco’s right. [corey]And we do get the better end of the deal with our lack of Y chromosomes. There are all sorts of things that are carried on the X chromosome that men are prone to getting because they don’t have the second X chromosome we have to potentially cancel out the recessive genes (baldness and colorblindness…and I think hemophilia as well).[/corey]

          Ta daaaaa! A lawyer who’s also good at science! I’m a statistical anomaly!

          Adores: 8
        • 2011 May 4

          I thought it would be funnier if I used the wrong one and in my at the time sleep deprived state, it was (to me at least).

          Adores: 3
      • 2011 May 4
        Lara permalink

        [totally off topic]

        Male Calico cats have two x chromosomes and a y chromosome. That’s why they are so rare.

        [/totally off topic]

        Adores: 5
  18. 2011 May 4
    ladycrim permalink

    “Ditch Witch RotoWitch.” Sounds like the beginning of a Dr. Seuss story.

    Ditch Witch RotoWitch
    Bored her way into a ditch
    Had a snitch with perfect pitch
    And a switch that had a stitch.

    Adores: 10
    • 2011 May 4

      The Ditchy Witch, ran by Mitch
      Found the ditch to be quite rich.
      But that ditch had an Archlich,
      So they joined and filled a niche.

      Adores: 5
    • 2011 May 4
      SpaceBug permalink

      Unto this niche there came a fitch.
      A fitch, that is, which had a twitch.
      This twitching fitch seeked a sammich.
      A sammich, his favorite, which was spinach.

      Adores: 6
      • 2011 May 4
        SpaceBug permalink

        A niche approaching, spinach sammich seeking, twitchy fitch called Goodrich,
        Sniffed the niche enhomed*, formerly ditch residing, richly smelling Archlich.
        Not spinach, thought the fitch, not so good for Archlich sammich,
        When noticed the fitch, topstitch kitsch would surely enrich this niche.

        The fitch then sat bewitched and thought he would unhitch.
        For the wafting aroma of quiche then came, the heady odor of spinach.
        Running with twitchy starts and trips, the fitch came upon a snitch.
        Baking the odiferous source for sure, the snitch it was…
        …An ostrich?

        *What, it’s a perfectly cromulent word.

        Adores: 4
    • 2011 May 4
      LimeLolly permalink

      Which witch did the snitch snitch the sammich from, and to which niche can we switch the hitch ?

      Adores: 7
  19. 2011 May 4

    [OT]

    I’m going to have to set aside a considerable chunk of time to go through this blog’s archives, but I think it will be worth it.

    That is all.

    [/OT]

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 May 4

      Better check your linky, ESP. I’m getting a “page not found” thingy.

      Adores: 0
      • 2011 May 4

        try this, no 404
        http://betterbooktitles.com/

        Adores: 0
        • 2011 May 4

          Thanks, I dunno what the heck happened to that link, but that’s what I was trying to post.

          On a related note, when I see that title my brain initially scans it as “better book kitties”

          Adores: 1
  20. 2011 May 4
    Ziaheart permalink

    Huh. I have no Y and yet that looks amazingly fun.

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 May 4
      LimeLolly permalink

      *throws a bunch of whys at Zia*

      Now you’re the “WHYS QUEEN”.

      Feel free to sing along:
      She thinks my tractor’s sexy…

      Adores: 3
  21. 2011 May 5
    Windrose permalink

    Taco and Mindee, Punchity Punch Punch and good night all.

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 May 5

      Yay, double boxed this week! It’s been a while since I’ve managed that!

      Adores: 0
  22. 2011 June 23
    Ziaheart permalink

    OT: going to visit some relatives in the States, we passed through Boring yesterday. Centralia was more boring. Boringer?

    Adores: 0
  23. 2013 June 23

    I just can’t get in to commenting today. I have a bad case of enui. *yawn*

    Adores: 0
    • 2013 June 23
      nojazzhere permalink

      Windrose….I would say I’m sorry you’re feeling ennui-ish, but I Just.Don’t.Care.

      Adores: 2
    • 2013 June 23
      CapnMac permalink

      (psst, You dropped this: “n”)

      Adores: 1
      • 2013 June 23

        Ooops. I guess I had a strange case of emu enui. Okay, that doesn’t make any sense, but I am happy Dan is back.

        Adores: 1
  24. 2013 June 23
    nojazzhere permalink

    ?

    Adores: 1
  25. 2013 June 23
    One Moving Violation permalink

    You’re not living right if you are considered to be boring and a tool.

    Adores: 1
    • 2013 June 23
      nojazzhere permalink

      Some think you’re not living right if you AREN’T considered to be boring and a tool….(fixed it for ya)…..

      Adores: 0
  26. 2013 June 23

    *points upwards*

    Puppy!!

    *sniffle*

    Adores: 3
  27. 2013 June 24

    So this one Saturday, not at band camp, ghostie, Miss Mommy, Capn, and me, we were hanging out at the lounge, when suddenly, out of no where, Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Gossamer!

    Adores: 1

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.