YSaC, Vol. 577: Watch out for the condo fees, though.
2010 February 14
Some enterprising souls have taken it upon themselves to find a way of using the SNOWPOCALYPSE to solve society’s problems:
$140 1BR Affordable Snow Fort Sublet In Capitol Hill
$140 a month, including utilities.
10-minute walk from Union Station and Capitol South metros.
Amenities: Wireless internet, doorman with fez, premade snowballs.
Available for move-in immediately.
Sure, it sounds like a great deal. I’ve heard that this building has had problems with leaks, though. And at night, you have to deal with the ice weasels.
The possibly awesome tag is coming in handy these days. Thanks, Jennifer!
Do the utilities include heating? ‘Cause if they do, that might be a bit of a problem. Like, after a while your home would be gone.
The fez-topped doorman is tempting, though. It looks like he’s taller than the residence. That could be good for security; on the other hand I don’t know how well or quickly he moves. The built-in defense of the premade snowballs might make up for that, though.
I love this ad.
Ah, yes, when I was a child (merely moments ago, you see), we would built snow-fort-igloo-condos and would heat the walls with our mitted hands to melt them, then the cold air would re-freeze the walls with an icy glaze. They would last great lengths of time, always melting into oddly shaped & stained snow pillars that were great fun to kick over.
Adulthood sucks.
You just have to reproduce so you have an excuse to go out and play in the snow. Either that, or get one of your friends or family to reproduce and borrow their kid.
I can justify pretty much any goofy thing I do (including getting stuck upside down in the playground equipment-thank goodness I got down without having to call the fire department) by pointing to my daughter and saying “I’m with her”.
It’s the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man! Since all the Ghostbusters got old and fat, there’s not much for him to do anymore. So, times being what they are, he had to take a second job as doorman to the castle-condo you see here.
The best thing about this ad, other than that it targets penguins, snowmen and eskimos, is that it’s all spelled correctly! Such a rarity on CL.
Doorman with fez. Yes, please.
I think it would actually be worth paying $140 to make use of this snow fort for a month.
I wonder if maintenance is included.
I really like that it comes with premade snowballs, so I can fend off those inevitable slackers who will try to use my wireless internet, because they have confused my snow fort with a starbucks.
Possible awesome, indeed.
What happens if you run out of snowballs?! The onslaught of those looking for wireless internet that you had fended off would crush the fort!
I imagine that housekeeping would make you some more, but if you need immediate support your Ottoman bodyguard will defend you.
One thing they didn’t mention was that the doorman with fez, actually towers over the snow sublet, thus becoming a barrier from the onslaught of snowball attacks..
On the minus side, they also didn’t mention that the doorman is extremely sensitive to the elements, particularly temperatures above 30 F.
That’s true. It would have to be a “Winter Getaway” sublet. Not only would the doorman with fez be subjected to the elements, the snowsublet itself is unlikely to survive the rise in temperature.
He’s also just very sensitive. Don’t mention that he has a big butt and a tiny head.
There’s a place here that I take everyone who visits me from out of town, because the tea, view, and hookah are all fabulous (and it serves alcohol!). It’s in a hotel, and the hotel doormen all wear a jaunty red fez. I’m not sure if the fez-wearing has anything to do with it, but they are, to a man, completely awesome – always welcoming and friendly and so fun to hang out with and talk to while you’re waiting for a cab/your guests who are inevitably late because that’s how we roll in these parts. I look forward to going there in large part because of them.
So what I’m saying is, if one of the listed amenities is a fez-wearing doorman, I will almost certainly give it a look whatever the other aspects of it happen to be.
Lareina, I’m totally coming to visit you just so that I can visit this place. Like you, the attraction is at least in part the fez-bedecked doormen.
However, if I can’t visit, I think I’ll see about renting this lovely snow abode.
When I was in college, I am pretty sure I have paid more for less. If there was an igloo in Florida, I would have rented it just for the novelty of it all.
This is way better than a box under an overpass.
Hmm, I prefer my place of residence not to MELT in the Spring, and to have a ceiling. But that’s just me.
It’s not just you. My first thought on seeing this was “Sure, it’s only $140 a month, but how many months will it be around?” My second was “Wait…I don’t see any roof. What a rip-off!”
That’s because the ROOF, the ROOF, the ROOF is on FIRE!
We don’t need no stinking roof!
Besides that is a beautiful skylight feature. With a view of the evening stars over… D.C.? Well, you can’t have everything.
Wonder if they have a rent to own option on this? I think I could buy it and transport it to Southern California. I’d have to let the doorman go, though. People out here are rather rude to folks with big butts and tiny heads.
You totally know that California is crawling with people born with tiny heads who either had the big-head surgery or went out there and developed big heads and aren’t telling anyone. Jerks.
Snow Balls?
Is that anything like tennis elbow?
OUCH!
Dang, I built a snow fort just like this on Friday, but all I have left is a pile of melty snow in a mud pit. Now I see that I could have made $20 on this “weekend retreat.”
See, they usually last a little longer up here. I knew there was a reason i love it here.
A man homunculus and his castle?
Christina, because it’s Valentine’s Day, here’s an early punch for you! 8) Hope Dev can update the forum page, I don’t seem to be able to do that any more. Anyway, congratulations! (And yes, the song book should be put in the forum!)
Thanks Windrose, Happy Valentine’s Day to you! Also, Happy Year of the Not.A.lion to all!
OT, can anyone tell if DA shell is minty in this photo?
http://thatwillbuffout.com/2010/02/10/funny-car-photos-how-else-would-one-transport-a-wheelless-car/
An Ottoman is working on his snow fortress. He stops to take a break, and a guy walks up holding an ax. They chat for a minute. Then the Ottoman takes out a cigarette, but he needs a light. He says to the other guy, “Got a match?” The other guy says, “Sure, your fez and my adz!”
[corey]
adze
[/corey]
+elebenty for best/worst pun I’ve heard today. 8)
[doublecorey]
“Adz” and “Adze” are both correct.
[/doublecorey]
Yes, but when I first read “adz” I thought it was lolspeak for “ads.” It didn’t make immediate sense.
Double CCs to you sir – I don’t think anyone has done a double corey at once before. Is that like a double lutz in skating? 8)
And he stuck the landing! *golfclap*
Gymnastic golf skating? Time for me to switch on the Olympics and see what I’ve been missing.
This ad just wins. In these times of economnomnomic trouble, we must utilize our natural resources!
*tummy growls* Sorry. It was the “nom nom nom” that did it.
I think we need a “DEFINITELY AWESOME” tag. Although it doesn’t have to be in all caps. I’m just so excited about moving into my new snow fort next month.
Stephanie,
This is OT but I followed your name link and love your page. Your cat looks like the twin of mine, including the white spot underneath (same shape and location). Mine has a white throat spot, but it’s the only way I can tell those pics are not of mine, as the resemblance is quite close. He’s very handsome!
Ahem. Back to thread.
And Stephanie’s cat looks just like my cat, Loki. corey on… They are all, apparently, Bombay Cats, a breed from the 1960’s corey off… Mine is also very good at Cat Math, because at night he is indivisible.
Mine has too much white (any) to be a true Bombay, but that’s definitely the look. Loki is a good name for the type if his personality is anything like the one mine has.
It’s Chinese New Year.
Happy Year of Not.A.Lion everyone!
It’s quite here lately because, A) Everyone went out of town for the long weekend, B) Everyone is busy getting some for Valentine’s Day, C) the web boss and consort needed some down time, or D) Others are experiencing the weird and irritating issues with the site that I have been experiencing. If you choose D, please tell me how you think we might resolve the problem, ie, getting bumped out of the site with an error message every time I click on the submit comment button, and not being able to post at all in the forum. Sigh. It’s probably my computer. Just not having much fun with it. G’night young lovers, wherever you are, hope you don’t get caught!
Mine was E) Attending Church, Niece’s B-Day Party, Watching Olympics with Dad.
But I am here now 11pm AK time.
I’ve been having the same weird errors. I was also attending my nephew’s birthday party, but mostly I’ve been quiet in the comments because of the errors.
I’ve been clearing out the day’s browse history and that helps in posting, though I did have a couple of times where I would get to comment and after I posted it, I got a message error screen. Still put up the comment, though. Thanks for reminding me about the forums – when I went to some of the ones in the second page (both YSAC and non- categories) and when I clicked on them there were no postings whatsoever.
It was early one morning,
I went for a run,
and quickly was blinded,
by snow and by sun.
It had fallen quite quickly,
and layed 5 feet deep,
I dug great valleys,
and mountains steep.
I realized fast,
I had got myself lost,
I could’ve called home,
but at what personal cost?
So I wandered some more,
I searched wide and far,
and carefully avoided,
that stray speeding car.
I came upon shovelers,
kids sledding- like Valdez!
Yet- Oh Joy! Oh Rapture!
I saw a man with a fez.
He was dressed up in red,
with that great furry black cap,
and offered me free wi-fi,
and a place to nap.
This place made of snow,
near Union Station,
had five star ratings-
The best of the nation!
Only $140 a month,
and free telephone calls,
an ice bucket, wine,
and pre-made snow balls.
I decided to stay,
bedded down for the night,
with my blankets and pillow,
I blocked out the (sky) light.
I sent post cards and such,
from my cold-weather dome,
proclaiming quite proudly
“There’s No Place Like Home!”
That was awesome. But shouldn’t it be “no place like Nome.” :-)?
Oh, and you saw the skylight feature too.
P.S. Valdez the town – if that is what you are referencing – rhymes with fees not fez. But maybe that is just a little poetic license. Sorry for the corey moment there. Move along, nothing to see here.
I think it was a reference to the Exxon Valdez. (/corey)
Could be, but it is still pronounced Val- deez, like fleas not like pez. 🙂 (/corey)
I think I’d be less worried about the house itself and more worried about the giant snowman neighbor. I prefer my neighbors to be more like… well… Asian midgets I can refer to as Godzilla. But who lives in a perfect world?
I’ve heard that fire foxes are pretty good at hunting ice weasels.
Thanks so much!
and..
“P.S. Valdez the town – if that is what you are referencing – rhymes with fees not fez. But maybe that is just a little poetic license. Sorry for the corey moment there. Move along, nothing to see here.”
Yeah, it was either going to be poetic license with ‘Valdez’ or “kids eating pez” 😀
I guess I forgot to mention the neighbors…
😀 Thanks again!
As high as rent is here in DC, that is a helluva deal.
Too cold this morning to even THINK about living in an ice house! I’ll be back when it’s warmer.
Near 75ºF here in wintery North Texas . . .
For that rent in Capitol Hill, they may well have had a taker.
Hey, free air-conditioning!
That’s so cool!
The power of the Ostrimu is truly impressive, as it has been snowing in mid-Michigan all morning.
I scheduled this post a week ago. 🙂
*pulls pocket watch out of rabbit suit* I’m late! DAFT and Ducky, Punchity Punch Punch! Happy Holidays!
Good Morning, Abominable Snow Slumlords!