You Suck at Craigslist

Do you want a pet, but don’t have time to deal with all those pesky needs they have? Here’s two possibilities that might be right up your alley:

Frozen Meduim Rat

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condition: new
Its a gray frozen rat we recently sold our snake and we had a extra frozen rat, if any one wants it we dident want to throw it away.

Now, to my mind, “new” condition for a rat is probably still breathing, but whatever. It’s low maintenance! It doesn’t need food! It doesn’t need water! It doesn’t even need oxygen! It does, however, probably need a cool place to keep the smell down.

Still too much work?

Free to a good loving home

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Free to good home, “Boulder” has been a wonderful companion.

However we are forced to downsize and are moving to an apt.

They do not allow Boulders on the premises

Boulder is very quiet, he will just sit with you for hours on end.

Please give Boulder a good home.

Boulder doesn’t need refrigeration, so you could start here, and when you feel prepared, work your way up to dead rat.

Thanks for the posts, Michael and Alisha!

Phish Hat

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Hey brother, I am sorry bout today, I got another hat ive never wore. Let me know some key details and ill give you this one. Seriously very sorry and want to give you this hat.

I’m not going to do it.

I swear I’m not going to do it.

Not. Going. To…

Phish hat, Phish hat, rolly polly Phish hat
Phish hat, Phish hat, eat it up, yum!

Dammit.

Thanks for the post, Andrew!

Need someone to change a wedding photo a little…

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for 10 bucks I just need someone to do a semi-convincing photo shop of a wedding photo. It is a pic of them cutting a cake. I need it to look like they are cutting an animal for some sort of sacrifice or something and the faces need to be blurred out like it would be on the show COPS. It doesn’t need to be perfect. Just pretty good. I can easily do it in something like MSPAINT but…c’mon…it would be crap.

Payment is via paypal. I’ll shoot it over. You can invoice me if you are a professional

Full subscription to Photoshop CC 2014: $49/month
High end photo editing workstation: $10,000
4 years of art school: $150,000

Ability to help Sparky here mangle someone’s wedding photo? Priceless.

No, literally priceless. As in, probably no one will do this for any price.

Have fun with MS Paint there, Sparky.

Thanks for the post, Lisa!

free Shelving an miss furniture

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Free shelving and miss furniture
COME AND TAKE IT

The ways of nature sure are mysterious, aren’t they? We don’t know why, but this small stretch of grass is known as the “IKEA graveyard.” When particle board reaches the end of its natural life, it is compelled to bring itself here to live out its final moments. This happens even if the owners weren’t done with the furniture yet, causing them to miss furniture.

Thanks, Ralph!

2 Snow cap Geicos with all accesories and cage

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Well, here we go again!. My 6 year old has decided to stop playing and holding her geico’s. We have had them for a couple years and they are both great. You can hold both of them with no issues. One of the geicos needs to be hand fed with tweezers. He a little dumb! LOL The other is a great feeder and hunter and no issues. They both eat crickets. WE buy 24 of the every couple weeks for like $3.50. Other than that very easy to care for.

You’ll get cage and everything in it and any criskets we have left.

Small rehoming fee of $20.00 for everything.

You know these kids these days. You give them a couple of large international insurance companies, and they lose interest after a while and stop playing with them and feeding them. At least this time it’s just these Geicos; last time I had to figure out what to do with two Aflacs. Nobody would take those — something about their voices being really annoying.

Thanks, Ralph!

Beany Baby, Princess Diane – $80

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Princess Diane Beany Baby, Valued at $1`49.00, Selling for $80.00.

Princess, Like an angle she came from heaven above. She shared her compassion, her pain, her love. She only stayed with us long enough to teach the worlf to share, to give, to reach.

Intrigued, I went and looked into what Princess Diane Beanie Babies are actually selling for. Turns out there are people actually asking hundreds of thousands of dollars for these things on eBay. Sadly, they’re only worth about ten bucks. There goes THAT retirement plan. I guess I’ll have to go back to trying to teach the worlf to share, and keep it company.

Thanks for the post, Maggie!