YSaC, Vol. 808: Catalogue des araignées
Rose turangula
Rose turangula, good temperment. With tank $50
Turangula here is clearly a misspelling of one of my favorite twentieth century orchestral works, the Turangalîla-Symphonie of Oliver Messiaen. (Incidentally, this work was also the source of Leela’s full name on Futurama.) Messiaen was a known synesthete, and he associated red colors with the key of B-Flat major. So this is some sort of rescoring of Messiaen’s masterwork in the key of B-Flat. “Good Temperment” here is a little bit ambiguous, because while equal temperament was most common by the mid twentieth century, “good” could also be interpreted as a synonym for “well,” meaning it’s performed here in one of the many variations of well temperament developed in the Baroque and Classical eras. Really, this is a brilliant juxtaposition of the old and the new – 20th century music compressed entirely to one key center, and performed using an obsolete tuning method. I’m not sure I’d want to listen to it all the time, but it’s an interesting artistic choice.
Plus, it comes with a tank.
Thanks for the listing, Starlingv!
Wouldn’t you know it…I’m the first one in the Snark Lounge this morning after having been gone for a few days, and I don’t understand one word of the Ostrimu’s* musical interpretation. More coffee probably won’t help, but I’m still going to make me a fresh pot.
*Good Morning and here’s some bees 🙂
Good Morning, Snarkers!
I’m with Archie, I have no idea what the Ostrimu* is talking about, but since I suspect the original post was about a really big spider, I’m sticking with the musical interpretation.
Although, could it be referring to the Tarantella? Which is better in rose, an orchestra, a dance or spider? Discuss.
*bees be upon him.
I got the same impression, LRC. Hope the tank is filled up with spider spray.
I understood orchestral, B-flat, and Futurama. How many points is that?
Integrate the legos… carry the buckets… You get thirteen water bottles. (Having an oddly-altered mental state really helps with the catmath… Hmm…)
I really did just read your comment, EB, turn my head to the side, and go “What? What does it MEAN?” Apparently I had a very distressed look on my face, too. I’m getting worse.
EB, I read that as “impregnate” the legos…
What does it MEAN?
Now I’m picturing Meredith looking at a double rainbow and crying.
“Impregnate the legos”???? OUCH! You ever step on one of those barefoot in the middle of the night?
That’s how you wind up with those little onesy legos! They’re the babies!!!
Personally, I don’t like my turangulas with rose. The have a much better finish with a chablis or, perhaps, a sauterne. Rose just isn’t distinct enough to offset the hairyness.
Gewürztraminer Grampdaddy
Gesundheit!
Ha, just as I was giving ACG a door for mentioning my favourite wine, I sneezed, thus making Grampdaddy’s reply even more apposite.
Now I need a lie down.
I’m going with dancing Harry Potter fan. Tarantallegra is the spell that makes someone unable to stop dancing.
I’m still afraid it’s the kind of thing that would require the arania exime spell.
And maybe a blue Ford Anglia.
I read that as “the enema extreme spell.” Yuuuck…
Ewwwwwwwwwww!
I read it as anorexia extreme and thought it might be the spell that hit the actors around the fourth movie.
Where’s Taco when we really need a ‘splosion?
Good morning snarkers. Everyone must have heard about my return today and hidden from me. Oh well.
This type of post is what separates this blog from other humor blogs – we’re highbrow. Therefore, I don’t get it, and will wait for the discussion to devolve to middle school humor before I can participate.
Penis.
How’s that? We devolved enough yet or should I add boobies?
Boobies were mentioned in the post, small boobies, B-flats. Maybe we should up the ante and talk about D-sharps.
Annette Funicelo had those in the ’50s.
Does it go against women’s progress of the last fifty years if I admit that I wish the bullet bra would come back into fashion?
I spent most of my day yesterday at Old Orchard Beach in Maine.
Or as it is abbreviated (no joke!)
OOB, ME
I saw Sting there during the “Dream of the Blue Turtles” tour or
whatever that was he named his first solo album.
Man, I’m old.
You’re not old, Smedley. You just require less training.
Case in point: The other day in my history class, a student made an oral presentation about the elebenty billion derogatory names for a woman and the relatively few for a man, comparatively speaking. At the end, the professor asked if the class could come up with any new names to call a college-age young man. Silence. Finally, after a lengthy pause to allow others to speak and not being a fan of derogatory phrases to describe either sex, I raised my hand and offered “WIP.” Puzzled expressions ensued until I explained…”work in progress.” A win.
You are too nice. I probably would have gone with something from the “Jackwagon” school of thought. I think I am going to have to advertise more. “Well broken in” sounds more like, “Well, broken.” Free agency begins at the end of the month. I just have to watch myself. Too many “Deployment Widows” down here.
I thought the derogatory names for college men were fairly obvious: freshman, sophomore, junior, fry cook. . .
Smedley – Mr. LRC was previously married, and I like to think of myself as an environmentalist, reusing resources rather than simply getting a new one. You might want to issue a disclaimer “some training may not apply” or something to that effect.
Hi
*Waves at AR*
PAM!
Hammy, have you tried the non-stick teflon spray? Absolutely no fats or cholesterol.
I thought Teflon was finally proven to be a health hazzard?
Only for Dukes.
Only if you chip it.
Huh-what?
You guys never disappoint. : )
Now that I’m back to “normal” life, there’s so much stuff I “should” do, but I haven’t been able to get away from the vortex of internet, TV, and novel.
There’s always next week, right?
I was not scared ere AR be
Return-ed from France.
Just delayed by circumstance
(& cleaning computer debris)
You wrote me a poem! : D
Many doors to you, good Cap’n.
Well, to break it down, synesthetes are people with an interesting cross-over of senses. Some see colors with sounds, some taste things when looking at colors, and so on. While I am sure the original ad was selling a really sweet big spider (why am I not afraid of tarantulas? Makes no sense) the musical interpretation of rose as a particular key is brilliant. Good temperament, that’s a stretch, but ostrimus are known for their long necks. And it comes with a tank, which is an obvious reference to penis.
And it comes with a tank, which is an obvious reference to penis.
Are you sure about this Windrose? I’m inclined to think ‘tank’ refers to vijay, since it does the holding.
The idea of a large, hairy spider in the ‘tank’ could result in a lack of performance issue – and years of therapy.
Oh, yeah, and when I think of tank, I do think of pink which is like rose only tastier.
I’m sure if you did a search for “big hairy spider” and “unfortunate tattoo” you would find exactly what you described, Grampdaddy. I’m pretty sure that Rule 34, Article 5 states, if a really bad tattoo involving genitalia is mentioned, someone was drunk enough to have it done and post pictures on the internet.
Grampdaddy, I was way too sleepy to add that I was thinking of the military tank, with treads and big weapon out front. Definitely penis.
That’s OK – I was too awake to NOT ignore what I knew you meant. 🙂
I don’t think I ever had the treads, and you must have seen me when I was a lot younger….
Sometimes I smell colors (and this is not limited to when I have ingested caffeine and narcotics together). It’s pretty cool…
I always wanted that power. My mom had a friend who’s daughter saw music. She said it was the best thing to ever happen to her. She was an artist, and she would paint based on what she saw.
There is a wonderful children’s book that touches on this. The book is Appelemando’s Dreams, by Patricia Polacco (ISBN 0399218009). The dreams of the child in the book colors the world around him – it is a wonderful story to promote imagination. Read it for yourself, for your children, friends children, and any child you care about.
Thanks Grampdaddy. This will be on my Christmas list for Eyebrow Granddaughter #1.
Can I just say how much I love that the most referenced media here is books, and they’re cited with ISBNs?
The only colors I’ve tasted are blue and red. I like blue better, it’s slightly tangy. Red tastes red, no fruit, no tang, just red. I hate red.
My favorite flavor of Snow Cone as a kid was blue.
“Swallowing colors of the sounds I hear”
“Flying High Again” Ozzy Osbourne
Though I have a feeling he probably had a little too much LDS in the 60’s.
Do I need to explain that one? Any Trekkies in da hizzy?
Save those whales, Smedley! 😉
Yay! And a double dumbass to Sparky!
Yes, I’m sure it is a spider of which Sparky speaks. Most likely acute one but it could be isosceles…….
I think it’s probably obtuse, but I could be wrong.
No, I think you’re seeing it from the right angle.
Well, once you figure out the hypotenuse, it’s all downhill from there.
You can’t fool me – all the hypotenuse live in Africa. Nice try, though!
I looked online at tarantula prices, “rose” (a.k.a. pink-haired*) tarantulas go for 15 dollars. And a tank probably only goes for 10 dollars.
*Don’t quote me on the name, I’m probably wrong.
What shade of pink are we talking here? You know, October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and these spiders could be a great way for pet shops to get in on the cause.
I tried googling it…
there’s only a little bit of pink on it’s head
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Grammostola_rosea_adult_m%C3%A4nnlich.jpg
ostrimu* was oh so brilliant in his deconstruction of this listing. I am moved to tears.
*bees be upon him.
And doors to you, kc, for your lovely photo.
Another favorite red-headed left-hander.
Hi Mom! ♥
Hi Mom! 8) Have some bees, it’s okay, there’s plenty to go around.
I see a Cyclopean spider driving an M-1 Abrams, thanks to the description.
In a pretty off-pink hue, of course. That smells music. And is generally
well disposed.
See, and when I first saw the listing, I thought of this, my favorite cartoon cyclops:
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_PuZoLkvmBbc/SgNUbWjhqiI/AAAAAAAADfI/gjfuwF0xQl4/s320/Turanga+Leela.png
I would NEVER think of keeping her in a tank, but maybe Zapp Brannigan would!
My edit tool isn’t working, but everything else is. I think it’s my computer’s fault.
Don’t think so. I had that problem a day or so ago, so it may be a periodic bug.
In my case, it may have been Automatic Updates installing a fake version of MS Security Essentials. <grrrr>
I kind of feel bad for Sparky. Having a really bad cold is crappy enough, but it makes communication a bitch.
“Heddo, Dr. Balcolm? It’s Sbargy. I thing my turangula is sick.”
“What? Who is this? Speak up, please!”
“Id’s about by TURANGULA! He doesn’t loog well! I thing I gabe him by CODE!”
“Wha-your what? I’m sorry, I don’t understand.”
“My TARANGULA! You dow him! He’s galled Deddis, like Dennis the Bedace? He’s a rose tarangula, I broughd hib in to see you three weegs ago!”
“I’m really sorry, sir, but I can’t understand a single word you’re saying.”
“MY TARANG – oh, fuck id. I can’d deal wid dis right dow.” *click* “Sorry, buddy. I tried.”
-fires up CL-
I can now suggest to Sparky that coffee through the nose is a great sinus cleanser. Thanks!
Geeze reina! 10++++ I’m gonna be giggling the rest of the day……
So what does music smell like if you have a cold?
Bacon, most likely.
And boogers.
REINA! HI. You’re back. Am I imagining it, or have you been gone from here for a looooong time? Maybe we just keep missing each other on here.
Why is it that I still miss people when they don’t post here, even if they’re already my FB friends and I see them every day????
Why? Becasue life is perverse like that. Just la tarantolla de tarantula.
hehehe, this is great. Oh, and it kind of ties into the Hyperbole and a Half post that I JUST read.
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/09/party.html
Welcome back, how you been?
What kind of science experiment results in a pink-legged spider? Who thought that would be a good idea?
Did they think that spiders were simply too creepy as they occur naturally so in an effort to endear them to the female population, they genetically messed with them and gave ’em pink hair?
Is it a hybrid of a tarantula and My Little Pony?
That’s why you see pistols with pink grips, and long guns with pink stocks and fore ends.
A p!nk gun…disgusting. There is a gun shop owner in town who (I’m sure) is very grateful I wasn’t armed when he mentioned that the shotgun I was looking to purchase came in pink.
If I was inclined to buy a gun, I would get a pink one, for the same reason that I have a hot pink carry-on; I need my things clearly marked as mine so I don’t grab the wrong one.
I’m considering having my car painted pink as well. I got into what I thought was my car the other day and wondered why the seat was pushed forward. Why the person with the exact same year/make/model/color car as mine would park next to me in an almost empty parking lot is beyond me.
I remember the designer colored pistols Agent 99 used in the “Get Smart” series. Did that ever come out on DVD?
Hahaha, christina! I had that happen to me the other day at the paint store. Went in to buy a 5 gallon bucket of paint, and one of the salesmen offered to take it out to my car for me while I completed the purchase. I told him it was the gold Ford Ranger. Turns out there were only two vehicles in the whole parking lot…both gold Ford Rangers.* Go figure.
*And yes, it did get put into the wrong one.
Or thorns? What good is a tarantula with thorns? I mean, they already have hair, and eight legs, and too many eyes, not to mention the pincers *tsk tsk tsk*
Pincers? Where do you live? Jurassic Park?
It’s a Harry Potter reference–everyone knows velociraptors have teeth.
Oh, yeah, to get away from the fish on the bicycles.
Yup, I’m pretty sure I saw that movie on the SyFy channel–or was that the genetically engineered killer hamsters wreaking havoc on a small town? After a while they all sort of blend together…
No, I’m pretty sure you’re talking about the giant piranhas that throw themselves at buildings and then explode. This is a real moment in a real move on the SyFy channel that I randomly walked in on. Exploding over-sized piranhas.
[arachnophobe corey] They DO have pincers. Well, some do. Someone told me that learning which ones could actually hurt me and which ones can’t might help the phobia. It didn’t…now I’m just extra-scared of truly scary ones. [/corey]
Psssst, Bridgete….
….
….
*TSK TSK TSK TSK TSK TSK TSK*
Pssst, Laurel…
*Wisk Wisk Wisk!*
Now go ask your parents to explain the joke.
[matt] I can’t believe you people are so closed minded! This is obviously a tarantula posted by a German person because the G sound in German is the same as the CH* sound that the T** makes in taranTula! [/matt]
*may be true, I’ve known a lot of “Chermans” but don’t know a lot of the language, myself.
**regional dialect, perhaps. I grew up saying “ta-ran-choo-la” but have also heard “ta-ran-tyoo-la”.
[corey] Nope. I don’t know the language but I know how to pronounce it (thanks to Diction for Singers) and G does not make a “ch” sound. However, they only make the hard G sound, not the soft G sound you hear at the beginning of the word “German”, so they’re probably making the “ch” sound as their best approximation of that sound. [/corey]
I used to work for a large German tech company whose giggle-worthy name shall not be spoke of, and all of the folks from the main office made a CH sound instead of a soft G, so yes, it’s probably in the accent, but hey, I hardly ever get to [matt]. :p
I always say, “Sweet Jeebus, look at the side of that damn spider.”
Then run away screamingWe had a VERY large Wolf spider on our screened in porch earlier this week – too big for the cats to take care of it for me. My four year old, who is learning about spiders in preschool, informed me that I should get a tissue or the like to pick it up and put it outside. I agreed with her.
For some reason, I wasn’t able to pick the spider up with the wiffle ball bat I used. I wonder why???
*splat*
Tell her she is welcome to help the spiders get outside.
Which side?
I am trying so hard to read everyone’s posts today, but all I can see is “blah blah Sparky blah blah blah boobs blah blah penis blah blah blah highbrow humor I don’t get even when not delirious blah blah blah”.
I’m putting on a great show of being coherent, until I say something like “There’s not salt. Can you go to the bathroom and get some?” or “I can’t feel my smell”.
Coffee has not helped, even bacon did not help. I’m going to load up on cold medicine and try not to say anything strange enough to make the people around me worry for my mental state.
Yeah, and all I got from yours was blah blah blah salt blah blah bacon smell blah. Pass the flask (filled with cold medicine)?
I’ll take a flask filled with flask appropriate liquids, as well. Maybe I’ll take my grammas old suggested remedy and make myself some sort of toddy. What’s the old cold remedy liquor? Whiskey? Brandy? Scotch?
I think the old cold remedy (at least the one my paternal grandmother used) was drink as much hard liquor as possible until you forget you have a cold. Any type will suffice.
I vote for brandy. Or hot buttered rum. Everything’s better with butter.
Grampdaddy, you might know this, being a vintage human.
*See, this took me a minute to think up. I’m two clicks behind today.
It’s generally brandy in a toddy, although you can use whiskey.
I don’t remember either …. but if you put it in hot tea (not too much tea), it counts as a cold remedy.
Well, probably the traditional is good scotch although I think sufficient amounts of vodka will have the proper effect. I know that vodka works very well for my allergies when they act up (and even when they don’t).
Hope you feel better very quickly.
*Coats the bottom of a mug with honey*
*Adds 1 oz brandy and juice of 1/4 lemon*
*Heats 1 cup water and tea bag*
*Pours steaming liquid into the mug and stirs*
*Hands Meredith the Hot Toddy and….*
To your health Meredith – Get well soon……………
Now where did I put the damn cap to the whiskey bottle? Oh, bother………..
If you coat the bottom of the mug with honey, wouldn’t you get honey on the counter? Wouldn’t you then be in a sticky situation?
Yes and yes. Gotta watch what and how one says stuff around here……
GESUNDHEIT Gramps!
*Hands Grampdaddy a wee dram of Laphroaig*
slangevar to all……….
I think I may be getting your cold because I can’t feel my smell either and it took me a minute to figure out what was wrong with asking someone to go to the bathroom for salt.
Yeah, first you can’t hear that well, and then everything gets a bit blurry. Then you try to read and start to wonder if maybe you’re slowly losing your mind, or in a major motion picture about a young woman slowly losing her mind, and are the unwitting star.
My guy is getting angry because I’ll say something, he’ll ask for clarification, and I will already have forgotten what I said. I just stare at him with a “whaaa???” look on my face.
My tired brain read that as “can’t smell my feet”, and I was wondering why that was a problem…
Must be time for sleep…
Meredith, I think you just nailed the Round-up for today! I’ll post it in the fora.
Wow, it’s busy in here for a Sunday.
I’d like to thank either Sparky or the Ostrimu for not including a photo of this item…assuming it is, in fact, an eight-legged creature and not a misspelling of a symphony.
I’M IN THE BOX I’M IN THE BOX I’M IN THE BOX!!!!
For serious, this just made my week. PUNCH ME! :::extends jaw:::
Oh, and I am doing a little happy dance here at home. A RL happy dance on the couch…and my guy is completely baffled at what “I’m in the BOX!” may mean in my cold ridden mind.
Congrads!!!! passes Lola’s extra large flask. I had it for safe keeping, but it sounds like you need it and deserve it!
:::Snatches flask::: mine…myyyy…prrreeecious. :::glug glug glug:::
Just for you, Meredith! Punchity punch punch! 8) Be sure to call it the Don’t Suck Golden Lotus, that ought to clear up any confusion your man may have.
NNNNNOOOOOOOOoooooooo
Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111eleventyeleventyeleventyplex!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Astro, you know I love you like my little bro, but hand over the horn. You know what you did, and you know the consequences. This hurts me more than it does you. It’s for your own good.
Nuh-uh. You did it first.
*sirens*
Astro, now how many times have you broken the style sheet, hmm? I’ll let you off with a warning this time, but if it happens again, I might have to
exterminate yougive you another warning.And you spelled “elebenty” wrong. I know, because I looked it up in the YSaCtionary!!!
I love it when somebody else breaks the style sheet.
And I think he’d call me a pervert again if I started talking about the golden lotus. He is seriously sensitive about “private” matters. Weirdo.
Dammit, is EVERYONE’S golden except mine?!
Can anyone guess who I’m channeling?
I dunno, Reina, let’s have a look…
Yep, I’ve lost it. Man person is watching football. One of the announcers just said “seven of nine” and I shout “HA!, BORG” . He totally wants me to go lay down now.
Sleepy Time Tea, honey, lemon juice, and Yukon Jack.
The portions of Tea and Whiskey are interchangeable
depending on severity of cold symptoms.
Legal Disclaimer: Please heal responsibly. YSaC is not a medical reference site nor are most of the folks who comment here doctors. Do not drive while reading YSaC. Do not operate heavy equipment or lift machinery. Uh, Take two flasks and call us in the morning. Keep under refrigeration. The Llamanun* and Ostrimu* will disavow any knowledge of advice dispensed here. That is all.
*Bees be upon the sacred and witty web bosses.
We are Holy Bees, if you please.
We are Holy Bees, if you don’t please.
hehe. many doors.
I am both a registered nurse an an attorney. Therefore, I feel qualified to advise you of the following:
*YSaC is not a medical reference site, most of us are not doctors, and some of us advocate the judicious use of high explosives as the cure-all for any difficulty. Evaluate our advice accordingly.
*You probably shouldn’t lift heavy machinery even if you haven’t been glugging Nyquil.
*Ingestion of generous amounts of alcohol is a time-tested method of treating the common cold. Brought to you by the same people who thought removal of large amounts of blood was a good idea. Both treatments result in a general dizzy feeling and a proportional diminishing of the cold in the general scheme of “things that are wrong with me.”
*Not valid in Utah.
*See your doctor before beginning this, or any, exercise program.
If you experience explosive diarrhea of the mouth, severe angina, a sudden urge to watch movies featuring Will Ferrell, or mild to moderate swelling or tenderness of the breasts, please whine about it to somebody else.
Um… What if I want to hear about the swelling breasts?
In exhaustive detail.
Well, it’s been swell, but the swelling has gone down.
Consult your physician if your election lasts more than four hours.
Uh oh, I have an ongoing issue with the mouth diarrhea, and the desire to watch certain Will Ferrell movies. Am I dying?
Death isn’t allowed in the Snark Lounge, Meredith, so as long as you stay here you’re fine.
I find no issue with what you said, cold or no cold. Who wouldn’t make that mental leap?
Seriously, isn’t she universally known by both geeks and non-geek males?
I make all kinds of comments during basketball games, and I like basketball. Of course the announcers make it easy when they talk about reach arounds, expert ball handlers and taking it through the back door.
I was JUST laughing about this commentator, because he would not stop talking about this guy who was so good at taking in the backdoor. How in the world did he not realize how his ten minute monologue sounded????
My man person is extremely nerdy, but in a slightly different way. He could tell me in detail the results of a pro wrestling match from twenty years ago, watches every video game based movie ever made, and has no interest in most of the typical male traditions, aside from some football watching.
Is it bad that I understood almost every word of the Ostrimu’s post, or is it just a sign that it’s a good thing I’m taking Music Theory this semester?
In other news, Cary had a spectacular show at Heart of Carolina Invitational, and we still only got fourth.
Nope, I understood it all too. Also, how are you taking theory in high school? I had to wait until college.
The chorus teacher has a Master’s in Music, and is working on his Doctorate, so he offers Music Theory as a course to sign up for.
I thought the theory of music was that it soothed the savage beast.
Or turangula.
music soothes the savage *breast*
It’s one of the most misquoted quotes. Wow, it’s hard to type one handed. I hate stairs.
Boobies attack?
I had a lot of theories about high school at the time. Most of them were 420 inspired.
We have AP Music Theory at our school, and it is ranked as the most difficult class–and the poor kids still don’t get paid for passing the exam like the kids who take AP English and science classes, which are much lower on the difficulty ranking.
At our school we have to pay to take AP exams.
I’ll be taking AP Theory and English next year.
I took theory in High School, too. And I still understood almost none of the Ostrimu’s* post. But I did what I always do when I don’t understand something and I suspect those around me will, I assumed a thoughtful expression, pulled at my chin a little, and said, “Hmmmm. IN-teresting.”
*Bees be upon him
Music theory was a required class for us in junior high (6-8th grade) and an elective in high school. Of course, that was several decades ago, before the arts were cut out of school budgets. I remember only enough to provide intelligent-ish reasons why I hate a particular band or song my husband plays for me. Beyond that, Uncle Google usually has the info I need.
There was a lot of support for the arts at my high school, especially in the music department, but I still didn’t have the option to take music theory.
I took Music Theory in college. That was so long ago, we just studied drums made out of animal skins and horns made out of, well, horns. It was one semester, along with Fire in Practice, and Identify Non-Poisonous Foods to Collect.
You got to learn to identify non-poisonous food? We just had Hunting and Gathering 101 and we’d generally lose half the class to a charging mastadon or a poor choice of berries.
The hollow log drum school was after my time, too.
How Not to Get Eaten was a major also. You had mastodons?
Damn you liberal arts colleges!
I didn’t take theory in college, but several of my best friends did, and all we did was giggle about the title of the course, “Introduction to Musical Theory and Aural Skills,” how’s that for middle school humor?
Hah! We didn’t have any of that new-fangled stuff when I was in high school. We didn’t even have a high school, we had to make our own out of mud and sticks and protozoa and spit. And we didn’t even have spit – we had to get it from mastodons, and they hadn’t been invented yet. Let me tell ya, we were tough then, not like those wimpy humanoids that came after. All they wanted to do was eat, drink, and reproduce. We had to reproduce with ourselves back then. Matter of fact, one of the nicest things you could tell someone was to “Go have intercourse with yourself!”
Heh, heh, those were the days…. what was I talking about? Think I’ll just go sit over here and take a nap….
Smedley, my husband is currently in the process of making a drum set out of the sycamore we had cut down this summer. I admire his patience. It is going to require cave-man era tools because the density of the wood will burn out the motor on an electric drill before he gets halfway through the first log.
A modern drum set? Or a Flintstones bongo drum?
That’s an actual question, not me being a dick. Speaking of cave man tech, [Cups and bowls corey] We make cups and bowls out of the boles of trees by sawing off the part we want to use and drying it for a few months inside. (Make sure there aren’t any “guests” in the wood.) Then you get a lit charcoal briquette and roll it on the top and scrape off the burnt stuff every so often. Make sure you have a clearly defined margin at the top, or your bowl or cup won’t hold liquid. When you’re done, get some food grade polyurethane and seal it up for a natural look, or stain it then seal it. Probably not dishwasher safe, but it’s neat. [/Cups and bowls]
Rock kit, snares, toms, and bass. He started out with raw pre-made shells, moved on to refurbishing non-minty shells, then started building his own and could not resist the challenge when we cut down the tree.
He may want to dry it pretty thoroughly first. Do you have a
dehumidifier? Dry wood is easier to work with. And maybe find
some one with a pretty big band saw.
Actually, he has to retain the moisture to keep the wood from checking. Once he has the basic shell he’ll have to dry it before finishing the cuts. I mentioned that I was talking about this and he told me he’s not sure this project will be seen through to the end. I’d believe him, but unless something goes terribly wrong, I know he’ll finish, even if it means inventing a few thousand new swear words along the way. This is why I stick to small wood working projects.
Don’t you be knockin’ those aural skills, Gail. Rumor has it they’ll be the next new Olympic event (non-scored), because if you’re any good at it, you deserve a MEDAL.
With thx to Lewis Black.
From the “Elvira” movie:
Elvira wakes up after being knocked unconscious, and finds
herself being held by the love interest.
Him: “How’s your head?”
Her: “Haven’t had any complaints!”
(Google search) Big+hairy+spiders+tattoos (safe-search off) (search)
AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
What the heck – this was supposed to be WAY up towards the top, concerning spiders in the “tank”……. See ‘christina’, way back there.
I don’t need to google it to know that I wouldn’t want to…
I agree with Silva.
I agree with MNM.
I googled it, and now I agree with all of you….aaaaaaaggggghhh!
I didn’t have to google it. I had a roomie back in the day who was a tattoo artist so we had tattoo mags all over the house. What was seen can never be unseen.
I sure miss Hammy’s regular Fun with Anagrams segments. We could have such fun with Rose turangula, good temperment. Any Takers?
The site I found only fit Rose turangula into the submit field.
ARENA GURU SLOT (I got nothing)
ERRATA SUNG LOU (Mr. Stool love to point out our faults)
GALA NURSE TOUR (Andie, you’re on!)
ANGULAR TRUE SO (How many sides does that table have?)
NATAL URGE SOUR (Cats are just as good as kids)
AURAL GORSE NUT (I’ve heard about this)
Here ya go Windy 😉
Rose turangula
*Anagram Fun*
Solar Tuna Urge (Happens when I go to a nude beach)
Urea Tango Slur (Gets pissy about a dance)
Ungulate Roars (How a ho
arse lion sounds)Oral Sag Untrue (Don’t worry Gramp, happens to us all *snicker*)
Neural Oar Tugs (Only one in the water)
Hooray! Thank you, Hammy!
I could never out anagram Ham but here:
Rose turangula, good temperment
Up-to-date, elegant rumormongers
What happened to the smiley face at the bottom of the page?
My cat ate them…….
. ^_^
(=’:’=)
(“)_(“)S
Love it! Another “wish I had doors to give” moment.
Nuh uh, my goldfish ate it…
>
Ooops, I forgot those characters get ignored 🙁
I just drove 6 hours and I have to be at work at 6am, I’ll be more snarktasicter tomorrow!
G’Night, OOB, ME!